Taking Sides: J. Geils "Love Stinks" vs Def Leppard "Love Bites"

Hold on this song has a little introduction to it...
It's ain’t supposed to be sad, though you might feel it that way
It's a song about desperation,
Every now and then we do get desperate.

This is a song about L-O-V-E,
and if you abuse it yer goin to lose it
and if you lose it yer goin to abuse and
if you abuse it you aint going to be able to choose it
cuz you aint going to have it further on down the line
and things aint going to be so fine
and yer going to be sitting there on your little machine
tryin to look and keep it clean and
You’re going to be home playing bingo all night all alone
and that's why your sittin there by the telephone
and you know that she aint goin' .. to .. CALL YOU!

So you put on the TV and you're watchin Johnny Carson
segueing right into the Tomorrow show
but that don't got the go so you turn it off ya turn on the radio,
the radio don't seem to get the click so you say
"Hey Man, I can't lickety split"
You start to open up a little book
and there's somethin there you got to overlook
and you say "BAY-BEE, you know there's somethin on my mind!"
You say, "Baby there's somethin on my mind -
I know that you're home and I know you aint all alone! "

So you start walking over to her house
and you get over to her house
and you walk over to her door and
you start poundin on her door and you say
"Open up the door bitch!
This is the wooba gooba with the green teeth, let me in!!"

Well, she opens up the door
and then you just kinda walk up to her and say
"Baby", [say Baby!] you look up way up at her green mascara
and you say "Oh my darling,
you know her and me was at the party as friends -
do not believe what they say
that's only gossip that they tellin ya -
a wise crack of lies!"
You say "Darling!!!"

Take your big curls and squeeze them down Rotumba -
What's the name of the chick with the long hair?
[Rapunzle!] Hey Rapunzle!
Hey Raputa! Raputa the Buta!
Hey Raputa the Buta flip me down your hair let me climb
up to the ladder of your love!!
Because this is the wooba gooba sayin to ya:
"Love comes once and when it comes
you better grab it fast cuz sometimes the love
you grab aint going to last and
I believe I musta,
You know I think I MUSTA,
You know baby I think I musta,
You know I think I MUSTA,
I MUSTA GOT LOST!!!!!!!

I'll take "Love Stinks" in a walk.

This is critical stuff, I know ...

I think "Love Bites" likes it; and for *this*, it is the better song.

I still wanna here his most recent solo record from a year or two ago. Chuck Eddy among others said it was really good...