"I'm not feelin' it."

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I think I would respect certain people more if they put a little Randy Jackson into the way they talk about music they don't like.

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:09 (twenty years ago)

At least Simon goes through the trouble to explain why he didn't like the music. Randy spews the same two or three lines all the time. It's like getting your criticism from one of those gimmicky fortune telling balls.

― Barry Bruner (Barry Bruner), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:15 (twenty years ago)

Yo dawg, I really like that Cure album, they did their thing.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:18 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, Barry, maybe Randy's a misguided ideal here, but still, I've gotten into far too many arguments about music with people where I wish they'd just say, "You know what? I think the thing is, I'm just not feelin' it." I don't know; maybe that's too Raggett-Zen or something.

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:21 (twenty years ago)

Now, if they want to elaborate on HOW they're not feelin' it, that would be extra-good, but on its own, it still beats snarky comments about bands being "derivative."

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:23 (twenty years ago)

I agree that "I'm not feeling it" is a perfectly legitimate comment on a piece of music. But it's just not very useful as criticism, which is supposed to be Randy's job.
(xpost)

― Barry Bruner (Barry Bruner), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:24 (twenty years ago)

But, quantitatively, if music critics stuck the the Randy Jackson model, sooooo many more albums could be reviewed in each print publication...

- Beastie Boys To The Five Burroughs, ***1/2, "It's a'ight, but at this stage in the game, they really need to bring it."

- Kanye West College Dropout, ****1/2, "Yeeyuh yeeyuh, Kanye's doin' his thing."

- Nellie McKay whatever her album was called, **, "Woah. I don't know, I just ain't feelin' it."

- William Hung America Is Dumbass, *****, "Yeeyuh, this is really where it all comes together."

- et fucking c

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:25 (twenty years ago)

b-b-but I thought you loved music criticism.

― oops (Oops), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:25 (twenty years ago)

You were a little bit pitchy in that last post, but that's okay, I'm still feelin' it dawg.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:26 (twenty years ago)

he's doin' his thing

― peter smith (plsmith), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:28 (twenty years ago)

I do love music criticism. I think I'm talking more about conversations with dumb people who want to seem smart and jaded.

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:30 (twenty years ago)

I mean, they'd do themselves a favor if they just got right down to it.

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:30 (twenty years ago)

I can only criticize music when I drink now.

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:32 (twenty years ago)

(xp)

And the thing is, that's OKAY! "I'm not feelin' it" is a useful criticism! It tells me about your relationship to the music in a remarkably honest way!

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:33 (twenty years ago)

Gear!, the Ghost is Born analysis was inspiring, truly.

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:33 (twenty years ago)

it'd be better if they put a little more Jermaine Jackson into the way they talk about music they don't like, ie. "this song is TORTURE."

― hstencil (hstencil), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:33 (twenty years ago)

if ive inspirrred anynoe toget it ive donee mijob, vomit

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:34 (twenty years ago)

TOO much music crit these days seems to cop outkast - "this record is like a brown stallion horse on rollerskates..."

― peter smith (plsmith), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:36 (twenty years ago)

its a perceptive emotional judgement. but if they put more jermaine into their summaries, it should be to 'lets get serious'.

― dickvandyke (dickvandyke), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:38 (twenty years ago)

they need to put more Lionel into their reviews: "I listened to this record all night looong, all night. Hello, THIS is the record I've been waiting for!"

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:49 (twenty years ago)

"I heard a song, I heard an awesome song."

― hstencil (hstencil), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:50 (twenty years ago)

more tina turner in their reviews would be great.

― dickvandyke (dickvandyke), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:51 (twenty years ago)

actually, i think they shouldnt be allowed to speak and should only offer ratings with macca-like thumbs up.

― dickvandyke (dickvandyke), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:52 (twenty years ago)

WE DON'T NEED ANOTHER REMIX
WE DON'T NEED ANOTHER GUEST SPOT
ALL WE WANT IS JAMS WITHOUT
P. DIDDY

― Tina Turner, Music Criritc (Dan Perry), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:55 (twenty years ago)

there should be more leon thomas in reviews.

this record has a master plan; le le le le le lo lo doo doo le le

― peter smith (plsmith), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:55 (twenty years ago)

more reviews should be like Underworld lyrics:

John Mayer - Room For Squares

you bring light in to a dark place walking in light glowing walking in light gold ring around you the hues of you the golden sunlight of you you bring light in, cool wind following, following after you, rising for you your skin beautiful everything comes natural fantastic fan rocking rocking floating, this record blows.

― Gear! (Gear!), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:59 (twenty years ago)

whoa - that review had a real shocker for an ending.

― peter smith (plsmith), Monday, 21 June 2004 17:01 (twenty years ago)

i think smiths/morrissey lyrics or song titles could prove very useful for pop idol judges.

'heaven knows im miserable now'
'its over, i know its over, i dont know how far i can go'
'some girls are bigger than others'

― dickvandyke (dickvandyke), Monday, 21 June 2004 17:01 (twenty years ago)

they need to put more Lionel into their reviews

I think I'd like most reviews more if they just said something like "OUTRAGEOUS!" and nothing else.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Monday, 21 June 2004 17:45 (twenty years ago)

Randy Jackson delivering reviews in the style of Alan Jackson.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 21 June 2004 17:46 (twenty years ago)

Kanye West - _College Dropout_ (***1/2)

"Everything sounds good in a room" she sings
Two chord cool in her head, she swings
Buzzing, buzzing, buzzing like them killer bees
Tell me this is not for real
Please tell me this is not for real

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 21 June 2004 18:18 (twenty years ago)

Review of Wilco, "A Ghost Is Born":

Why don't you do what you do
When you did what you did to me?

I was crazy for you.
You were crazy for me.
How could something so right go so wroooooooooong?

― Jermaine Jackson, Monday, 21 June 2004 19:19 (twenty years ago)

I think the obvious critical model is Whitehouse lyrics

Red Medicine
(Fugazi, Dischord Records 1995)

I'm comin' up your ass!
You won't like it, sugar!
Not as good as Steady Diet of Nothing

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Monday, 21 June 2004 19:28 (twenty years ago)

I'm not feelin' this.

― demetri, Monday, 21 June 2004 20:04 (twenty years ago)

I bet you wish you were feeling *this*! wakka wakka hey!

― oops (Oops), Monday, 21 June 2004 21:36 (twenty years ago)

jermaine's review of wilco above is reallllllly OTM.

― teeny (teeny), Monday, 21 June 2004 21:47 (twenty years ago)

All reviews should be done in the style of Kompressor.

― noodle vague (noodle vague), Monday, 21 June 2004 21:54 (twenty years ago)

Demetri! WTF!

― jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 21 June 2004 22:02 (twenty years ago)

Hey J!

We look hard
We look through
We look hard to see for real
Such things I hear, they don't make any sense
I don't see much evidence
I don't feel
I don't feel
I don't feel

Name that tune!

― demetri, Monday, 21 June 2004 22:57 (twenty years ago)

Sisters of Mercy, "Lucretia."

But, uh, that's all thanks to Google; it's not like I knew that or anything.

― jaymc, Monday, 21 June 2004 23:21 (twenty years ago)

(At any rate, welcome to the club!)

― jaymc, Monday, 21 June 2004 23:24 (twenty years ago)

Haha I KNEW THAT WITOUT USING GOOGLE!!!

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 22 June 2004 00:24 (twenty years ago)

Despite his use of certain phrases I always found Randy to be the most informative of the three judges. Simon wasn't very good until the end, he'd say "that's just crap" and even when he was right (and he usually was) I'd resent him to for not articulating why. Paula was fairly useless after the initial auditions obviously.

The Simon-equivalent judge in Australia ("Dicko") was much better - he had a great way with imaginative insults and put-downs but the insults always contained a moment which pinpointed exactly what was wrong with the performance and needed to be improved, such that it was basically constructive criticism wrapped in barbwire.

― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Tuesday, 22 June 2004 01:15 (twenty years ago)

When Randy says "dawg," even as an african american, I still get offended and think it's racist.

― David Allen (David Allen), Tuesday, 22 June 2004 01:16 (twenty years ago)

You're the man now, dawg.

― Slim Pickens, Tuesday, 22 June 2004 01:41 (twenty years ago)

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