who writes this crap?

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".. shows just how far he's come in turning an unconsious childhood passion into consumate artistry."

"..offers up a dozen tracks rich in craft and texture, all drawn from deeply personal sources but composed to offer universal insight."

This is actual copy from the "bio" section of a musician's website. Anyone else have some great examples of press releases or reviews with a similar tone?

― mike h. (mike h.), Monday, 19 July 2004 19:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Um, I wrote that.

― Huck, Monday, 19 July 2004 19:10 (twenty-one years ago)

those lines aren't THAT bad if you're not writing them about YOURSELF

― amateur!st (amateurist), Monday, 19 July 2004 19:11 (twenty-one years ago)

To give this example credit, there were a lot of song samples on the site, so I guess a description of the music wasn't necessary. Still, wow.

― mike h. (mike h.), Monday, 19 July 2004 19:14 (twenty-one years ago)

And if Huck is totally serious, that the fastest answer to a rhetorical question that makes me look like an asshole I've heard today!

― mike h. (mike h.), Monday, 19 July 2004 19:16 (twenty-one years ago)

ILX: here to SURV

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Monday, 19 July 2004 23:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Tim Mahoney? Never heard of him...

― James Mitchell (James Mitchell), Monday, 19 July 2004 23:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh fuck that's about TIM MAHONEY! hahahahaha! Man, hee hee James I'll take you down to Lord Fletchers on Lake Minnetonka so you can see what it's like to get the full blast of Tim Mahoney and the Meenies in flight!

OGARAS GARAGE REPRESENT MUHFUKA!

― M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 00:15 (twenty-one years ago)

and no, I'm not the poor man's Martin Zellar, bitches.

― Tim Mahoney (Matt Helgeson), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 00:17 (twenty-one years ago)

ha.

Tim Mahoney played at my school this spring. I did not go. I don't understand why I have to know he exists.

― artdamages (artdamages), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 00:18 (twenty-one years ago)

it's your job, dude! know that shit!

― Who Will Cut Our Hair When Tim Mahoney Is Gone? (Matt Helgeson), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 00:20 (twenty-one years ago)

seriously though you should have gone...it would have been good yucks for free...

― M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 00:20 (twenty-one years ago)

it would have been. i am obligated to hold a grudde against the organization that brought him in though.

― artdamages (artdamages), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 00:23 (twenty-one years ago)

the young republicans?

― M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 00:23 (twenty-one years ago)

something like that. (actually the guy who was the hea dof the college republicans lived in my dorm a 2 years ago and we share a first name and people I thought [i]I[/i] was the pres. of college rep.)

and I am setting up shows this year, funny. Tim Mahoney, Stuart Davis and Mason Jennings on a triple bill. how bout it.

― artdamages (artdamages), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 00:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Ill shut up now. I am suffering from heat strokes.

― artdamages (artdamages), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 00:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Damn, the secret is out. That guy tours through my college town (well, what was my college town) at least every six weeks and puts on what I've heard is a great show for the fraternity/sorority kids. I figured such hilariously nebulous writing could really apply to anyone (and those phrases really COULD describe anyone), so I didn't attribute it.

Saw Stuart Davis once, no strong opinions. Is he just the same sort of constantly-touring deal for a different crowd? I could see that being the case.

― mike h. (mike h.), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 02:33 (twenty-one years ago)

shitty mpls rock takes up a surprising amount of ilx attention, i love it. but i missed something here, how did we get to tim mahoney out of nowhere?

― g--ff (gcannon), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 05:22 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't know, but I think it has something to do w/Cities 97 somehow.

― artdamages (artdamages), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 05:35 (twenty-one years ago)

i said the same thing about pawlenty

― g--ff (gcannon), Tuesday, 20 July 2004 06:26 (twenty-one years ago)

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