Who saw the Billboard awards?

He went on for literally 6 or seven minutes. It was incomprehensible - strings of gibberish cliches like "somewhere between a smile and a teardrop" and quasi-motivational new-age hooey about reaching inside yourself and pulling out the best (in my case, certainly not the kidneys). We had entered another dimesion. And still he kept talking. Gripping the mic tighter, his knuckles whitening, his face turning red and sweaty, his stare more fixed and crazed, like his mouth was a motor whose switch was unfindable. We were imagining big red lights going off, klaxons wailing, agonized camera directors making the throat-slitting gesture, MMcC seeing all of it but hypnotized by this shockingly unedited speech that unspooled sadistically on his teleprompter. When it was over finally, all of us sort of patted ourselves to make sure we hadn't just been dreaming, and Johnny Cougar himself strode out looking fat and happy. THe first thing he did on approaching the podium was take out his reading glasses and put them on. Moans heard round the world.

Did you see when PINK introduced Bernie Mac and said "he only takes pictures with white people!" ???? wtf?

God I love Pink's new single.

I managed to see Britney's horrible performance. Not only is she just tacky as a performer, she manages to get some of the worst outfits on her body, as well. What was the look she was going for-- leprechaun? And what did it have to do with the song "slave" or the waterworks behind her? Get a clue, dummy.

The more I see Britney perform, the less respect I have for her. She's not a particularly good dancer, her clothes are, um, unflattering at best and the lip synching, the constant lip syching - it's not like her prerecorded vocals are anything even decent, who cares? We were talking about it while she was performing, her dance routines are never that complex or strenuous, because she's not a particularly above average dancer. So there's really no lame Janet Jackson "I dance too much to sing" excuse going on. What's the story?

Didn't see it, but MMc sounds just like Bono at every awards show ever.