who wanna battle?

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well it seems to me, that in other forums people wanna talk shit and battle. Why not create a space for that. spit yo shit.

― kazper, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I think you'll find the Jay-Z/Nas thread further down the page.

― Marcello Carlin, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

like a dj battle? okay, here's my bizness:

wikki wikki wikk....wiki wikk wikk......wikki wikk wikk wikk ikiikiiwiwkkwii....wiwkkwiiwoook wook wiikki wook....wookawookawikki wikk...wikk.wikkiw.....wikkwii....

yeah.

― Gage-o, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

your momma's got bad breath

― M. Matos, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

m. matos

thats why yo mama got one tittie tyring to breast feed twins...

― kazper, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

m. matos

thats why yo mama got one tittie tyring to breast feed twins...

― kazper, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Fuck off bitch.

― Andy, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

oh yeah, well uh, um I'm gonna breastfeed you, uh....yeah!

― Gage-o, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

both yall last cock suckers r lame, grt the fuck off the computer, go play outside, or somthing

― kazper, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

um yeah well, uh, you are dumb. and stuff.

― Gage-o, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Cockfarmer.

― electric sound of jim, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

"It's like bringin' a post to a Statscock, a pen to a blogwar - S-K-Y too STRONG for y'all!"

― Tim, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

"Rebellious" boy/Got no cause to complain/ya hoes write ya prose/you piss yo life down the drain/folk don't care about yo lines/'cos we ideas too/you little fuck/I got CD stacks bigger than you!/and if you get strong like/I'm gonna hit you bomb-like/speaking in my blog-mic/watchin' all your clan pike/Never had a problem with ya up to '01/then I got a sniff of all the shit that you done/never finish album lists/can't update on time/fuck ya and ya blog/and all the shit that you rhyme/For shizzle, I saw ya/when you be readin' ma words/tryin to understand/all that music you heard/you phony ass nigga/I know those words were once mine/posted on your page/should know that stealin's a crime/and I blow ya revelations/away like mining excavations/with the new shit I be postin/keep the whole beeyatch toastin:

S-K-Y/We runnin this blog shit/Freak-Trigger/We runnin' this blog shit/Josh Kortbein/We runnin' this blog shit/we win da attention/and score all the phat hits/the Popshots bully/We runnin' this blog shit/Sterl and Jimmy combo/We runnin' this blog shit/Ears be Bleeding/we running this blog shit/the people have spoken/we're the masters and that's it!

― Tim, Thursday, 20 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

kazper--hmmm, an appropriate alias/ with your white-ass rhymes more played-out than Beetle Bailey is/ you say "create a space" but we got a whole fuckin' site/ i'd "create a space" in your moms but that shit is too tight/ that line is fuckin' wack 'bout "trying to breast feed twins"/ shit, you think if you post it twice it'll make any more sense?/ your rhyming skills reveal you to be a grade-a simp/ if "cock suckers r lame" your moms must have one helluva limp/ your shit don't work right like serious movies with Jim Carrey/ named after a fuckin' ghost that ain't even scary...

Backdafucup--

― Clarke B., Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

why you fuckin wit nigga in all black/ testin my niggas wit nut sacks/ bigger than yours/ im getting bored/ slicing you haters with daggers and swords/ niggas excited while bitches bighting the lyrics im spittin so figuretively/ boy you a hater/ your mammy im rapin/ im dickin and stickin her vigerously/

― kazper, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

"your mammy im raping"??????????????

mammy?

― Ronan, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

my moms you're rapin' only in your imagination/ to get your cock hard requires too much concentration/ you're too busy jackin' off into ads for lingerie--nah, make that boxer-briefs... you say you ain't gay?/ how the hell do you know about the size of my stuff, bitch?/ who cares if your nut sac's big when your cock is microscopic?/ and by the way, the only mothafucka i'm testin' is YOU/ based on spelling alone, you get about a two/ which incidentally is the length of your cock in inches/ while fuckaz like me are slammin homers your fat ass is warmin benches/ and you're lucky i'm not grading for content/ but seeing as there's none it's not even worth the time spent

Beeotch--

― Clarke B., Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

This thread reminds me of Ricki Lakes shows where the people come on and rap.

Ethan to thread surely, if only to take the piss.

― Ronan, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

"niggas with nut sacks"

kasper, i'm unaware of gangs of African American males without their testicles. And more importantly, those who would proudly announce to others they there are without them.

here's my rhyme:

"when my adidas hit the stage, at live aid.." wait, that's not me.

― Gage-o, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

you all rhyme like icp.

― ethan, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

So why don't you step up and put your ass where your foot is, huh? Or you a CHICKEN(bear), boy?

― David Raposa, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

theres something about rap lyrics in print that's just very cringey.

― Ronan, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

My favorite thing about Ethan = defending rhyming from any and all attempts to democratize it. Half of the reason I decided to put vocals on that Listening Chamber I did was to get Ethan to eviscerate me, but apart from an offhand IM dis with Ian, no dice! I was hoping to start an argument about the paradoxical insularity of hip-hop relative to other genres, but I'm assuming that it was, quite reasonably, taken as a deliberately crappy joke.

― Nitsuh, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

yo yo

girls with fake lips flip scripts over the loose lips that sink ships/using hairclippers to shave your legs while you listen to the honeydrippers/i saw yo ma stealing old spice from the pharmacy/she got caught and accidentally got charged with petty larceny/ i'm a man who can lactate chocolate milkshakes/ You let a yeti masturbate on your birthday cake/

― Gage-o, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

[[my god, I can't believe this guy actually took my bait as...uh, bait!]]

― M. Matos, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

it's a beautiful thing, though, eh?

― Gage-o, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

tim and i would like you to get out of our way fools.

now where is that punk because i came up with problem is you're just sad and bloated/like tales from hiphopographic oceans today in the car.

― jess, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

(jess, sadly for me that line is much better than anything I'll ever come up with, but nonetheless:)

Think yuz a jukebox? Ya ain't got a hit/I got more wisdom in da flecks of my spit/blastin' on and on about Manuel Gottsching/don't ya know kid that ain't the way to bling bling/Ya tired, nigga, ya act is lame/the longer ya stay the more ya shamin' ya name/Yours be the blog the playas wanna disown/tryin' to win us back but son the chicken has flown/and the wolves is gonna bite ya if ya stay in these lanes/my sweetest lines will give ya them sharpest stomach pains/Don't try and contest me, cuz I'm URGENT AND KEY/the kind the ballers write to cuz they wanna be me/my mailbox is flowin' with all my adoring fans/and the people in power be always shakin' my hand/And I still stay hard cuz i hardstep fast/breakin' em off while ya'll be coming in last/no-one wants to hear about ya indie-boy woes/'bout the last time ya let a girl step on ya toes/so get back, baby, don't step up to the lord/don't make me have to cut off ya umbilical cord/think ya can halt me with your pissweak invective?/I'll slit ya, steal your copy of "Seasonally Affective"/(the worst part about it is you got okay taste/so why is everything ya say about it such a waste?)/"Dubplate-style?" You's a broken cassette/with the worst damn flow of anyone that I've met/I'll tell ya the reason, just so ya can see/it slowly dawnin' on ya like a nasty STD:/ Stop PAYIN' them hoes to write ya lines/for a small remuneration, I write a hot dissertation/But if ya wanna learn my tricks just to try and slay me/All I'm gonna say is baby "Fuck you, pay me!"

― Tim, Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Ethan:

Lyrical skills for you my friend will always be but a dream/ naive little hopes of becoming a hybrid of Scott Herren and Rakim/ you think you can make it as a critic with some gimmicks and some smarm?/ coming up high on queasiness and dangerously low on charm/ keep going though you might get to be an intern at Warp--fair enough/deep- throating Tom Jenkinson while jacking off both Boards of Canada...

― Clarke B., Friday, 21 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

naw, phuck dat, ima physical cat/im the nigga that beat the x-men with a barbed wire bat/told you earlier iwas a fool, but you failed to believe/ now you callin the police, and there here trying to retrive me/ cuttin hatas with my lyrics like my style was a surgeon/ have you washing out your draws, bitch im bold like detergent/ what niggas think bout that/ what niggas know bout rap/ heard me spittin 8 and leaving niggas dead on they're back/but fuck dat / you wanna hear wack/ rewind and play yo shit back/ took you 40 mutha phuckin minutes just to write that

― kazper, Wednesday, 26 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

that's not how you pronounce 'rakim'.

― ethan, Friday, 28 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Where our ringer? STERLING TO THREAD!!

― Tracer Hand, Friday, 28 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Y'all cats been wastin' your time/workin to get up an freestyle rhyme/fuck dozens/my skills too fine/rather explain/where i been takin my game/out with a shorty/sweet sixteen/she so horny/we up all night/keepin her right/like my rhymes she tight/midnight hour/she feelin my power/two in the morn/we gettin it on/six am/we at it again.

You showin me disrespect/but i showin her howta put a leg behind her neck/you tryin to bust on music crit/i shown' her how Keith Sweat keep a crib lit/you wanna wind me?/first you gotta find me/check up in her/i'll sinnin so deep/pullin out take a week.

I rhyme like I ride/tongue twists deep inside/i got moves/like kubrick got movies/sharp, anguler, intense/and lolitas all do me

I pay her bills/got life skills/got the drill/from ms bikini kill/know howta turn off the tv set/know howta get off the internet/keep posts concise/an i get off in real life.

So ya'll can crawl/back to your terminal/yo tty/yo S-K-Y/Yo I-L-Apple-Pie/yo might wanna C-R-Y/coz I just ride/an you lonely gentlemen/nice posts/y'all sleepin alone tonight.

― Sterling Clover, Sunday, 30 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Um...I know you are, but what am I?

― Ned Raggett, Sunday, 30 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Get the beastie boys in here to clean up this thread.

― Ronan, Sunday, 30 December 2001 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

two weeks pass...

AHEM.

All you do is just spin your wheels
Kick up mud and break your heels
Ripping off Hova
This bullshit is ovah
Pour out my Lucky Charms and mow down this half-ass Clova
The bully’s in action
Quiet on the set
Check the gate, set the scene
And start takin’ bets

I play you diary queens like baseball cards
Trade pine for sluggers; it ain’t that hard
Your stack is a joke, no stars and no stripes
World Chump is your title, sucker punches all night
You can’t hit me straight when I bring it real
I hit you; you hit ropes; how’s THAT shit feel?
Shove your stack in my Schwinn
Watch you crack & spin
Buy another pack and stick it to you again

Now I’m just an extraordinary guy
So please excuse me while I kick this sky
Fanning the FLAAAAAAAAAAAAME
Talking so LAAAAAAAAAAAAME
Rip another track, it’s all the SAAAAAAAAAAME
And the Jukebox, Rebellious, Cantankerous - no, wait
A gator, an aardvark – lemme set this shit straight

One is URGENT AND KEY
Something like me
They all think I’m him
But not quite, you see
Check the pedigree
It’s no mystery
I set fire with words
He burns in effigy

And this one talks like he’s paid
With nickels and dimes
Calls his homies collect
Cheap shit wastin’ our time
I hang up, he calls back, says he wants another shot
I say, just two-step your lame ass off my damn pot

― MC No Flo, Wednesday, 16 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

how's that shit feel? how's WHAT shit feel? / i hit frozen ropes straight back through ya INfield

― Tracer Hand, Wednesday, 16 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

two months pass...

My balls are as big as monkeys/ they are so big in my pockets i can't put my keys/ they are bulgin for your momma/ they want her nut sack on my tummy/your balls ain't big your dick is just small/ you thought you had your first pube til you nutted with it on the wall/i'll slice you and dice you/ cut your ball ups and put in my fettuccini alfredo/ vot george bush/ cause your bush covers up your tiny weenie cause my balls are as big as moneys/'lick on my vaginy it is your mommy/ your next door neighbor is putting his sponge on your daddy/ yur daddy is a fag/ his nuts like to sag just like spongbob squarepants/ your mom had sex with bob/ she licked his cob/ it wwas bob/ dole/ on a roll like butter on your teeth and your shoe has a sole/with your mikey wanna be nike/ you have balls on your chin like the new season of south park you are a dork talkin bout byork you eat potatoes with a spork / nut sack grow in canada

CANADA SUCKS THEY PROTEST NUT SACKS QUEERS

― monkey balls, Monday, 18 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

YA NEVER HERD OF THIS MURDEROUS MC STYLE SUPERB WITH THIS YOU COULDNT SWERVE WITH THIS OR SPEED UP TO ME ON A HIGH SPEED CHASE, I SHIFT THE CLUTCH, BUMP CHUMS ,AND WHAT? IM RIPPIN IT UP IM HANGIN CORNERS TYPE CAR LAMBORGINII YOU COULDNT SEE ME LIKE SOLAR RAYS SEARCHIN FOR HUDINIIYOU KNOW MY ESSENCE HIP HOP AND ENERGY ASASINATE YA NEVER HATE YA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 111

― JOSEPH VELASQUEZ, Tuesday, 19 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I LOVE TO SMOKE, WHEN YOU SMOKE WITH ME YAOU BETTER TOACK,WHEN IT COMES TO THE ROACH,DONT APPROACH,CUZ THATS WHEN I PUT IT IN MY PIPE, SMOKE TO MY DELIGHT,I DONT TRIP WHEN THE COPS SEE CUZ I RUN WHEN THEY SAY FEEZE,HIDE IN THE TREES, HIDE THE PIPE IN MY SLEEVES,AS I DITCH THE COPS MY HOMIES GIVE ME PROPS,FUCK THE COPS, THEIR FUCKEN LOPS,I PICK MY WEED FROM THE CROPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!

― Joseph Velasquez AkA AsAsIn 187, Wednesday, 20 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

i don't like how everyone was seemingly pitched against me on this thread? like i'm the evil kirk of the blog world. sob.

― jess, Wednesday, 27 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

That's acause your flow was WEAK, beeeeyotch.

― Sean Carruthers, Thursday, 28 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

i stand by problem is you're just sad and bloated/like tales from hiphopographic oceans.

(guilty...of being...white...)

― jess, Thursday, 28 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Tim's blog rhymes are off the heeezeee! for Sheezee!

― Ron, Thursday, 28 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

But Ron I don't have any hoes. Hustlers, yeah, hoes, no.

― Tim, Thursday, 28 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

you don't need hoes to be off the heezee! Fa shizzle, my nizzle!

― Ron, Saturday, 30 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

jesus wept.

― ethan, Saturday, 30 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

... is Ethan's favorite PM Dawn album.

― Ian, Saturday, 30 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Wait, I'm confused... then what does "Heezee" mean in this context?

― Tim, Saturday, 30 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

off the heezee = off the hook

― Ron, Saturday, 30 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

=I like your raps

― Ron, Saturday, 30 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

IT JUST GETS WORSE

― ethan, Sunday, 31 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

see, you post a compliment on the battle thread and all goes to pot.

― Ron, Sunday, 31 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Hey, evil Kirk, let's hear s'more of your parallel universe RHYMEZ.

― Sean Carruthers, Wednesday, 3 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

two weeks pass...

my nuts are of simian origin i'm a rapper so i don't use a pen kickin' it in the big a only fish fil-ay

yo.

― Gage Villere, Thursday, 18 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

This is wack.

― Mr Noodles, Thursday, 18 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

one month passes...

Wack are me rhymes, when i trhow them in your plate in your time to dine/Dont u expect no mercy from the big-ass hurry, cos hell kick your face adn youll look like lurry/Mr Noodles i know u triyng to escape, but there aint no way cos im on top of me game/Cup Noodles i saw ur ad, i pour with boiling water and u turn red/U scream and shout like a lil bitch, i say haha now is time to taste me fist/I feking swing dance and holler, like a raver floating over da water/Now when i am done over, youll cry to mama like u were at dover/Ill fuck you up and lock u fast, inside a dolphin belly's trap/There aint no way u r escaping from there, cos ill sew the shit up and let u wit no air/When u see death in front of ur face, youll scream why god such disgrace/Ill be saying too u now dont u mess wit me posse race, cos Chupa-Cabras will cut ur baby face

SEN?

― Chupa-Cabras, Thursday, 30 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

This Is Still Wack.

― Mr Noodles, Friday, 31 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

two weeks pass...

some 1 needs to challenge me

― jacob, Monday, 17 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

chupa!!!! where are you!?!?!?!? someone wants to BATTLE!!! jacob, chupa cabras would love it if you posted some scathing rhymes on his battle blog

― Ron, Monday, 17 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

i got the skillz..that will make you ill..so listen as i glisten on tha microphone so let it be known i aint no sista of the alcapone..

― miSSxthICknESs, Wednesday, 19 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

A month later its still wack.

― Mr Noodles, Wednesday, 19 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

This thread has "Very Bonkers" written all over it.

― Christine "Green Leafy" Indigo, Thursday, 20 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

"very bonkers" reminds me of "its very stimulating"

― Ron, Thursday, 20 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

make it go away, mommy.

― jess, Thursday, 20 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

C'mon c'mon, evil Kirk. MORE RHYMEZ or this gets dragged out forEVAH.

― Sean Carruthers, Thursday, 20 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

but good kirk

deserved to ummmmmmmmm, die as the ...prototype.emo.figure. What do you think Spock?

― Mr Noodles, Friday, 21 June 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

one month passes...

Wilf Smarties in the howse! Yowser!

― Wilf Smarties, Sunday, 28 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Come here and then we can have a nice FITE!, beatch

― Chupa-Cabras, Sunday, 28 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

one year passes...

revuve

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 8 January 2004 08:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Freestyle (I'll do some breaking later):

you want a revue?/heres what i'll do/speak my peace/thereby entertaining you/i've sat here all night/drinking beer by myself/smokin sess/but my flow is still tight/tho i'm severly depressed/right, like i said i can bring it anyway/i got more consonant than fenway/you might be asking.../but i'll interupt you/i'm a self- obsessed asshole/and I think I'm above you/still i've got more shame than an old sebadoh song/insert masturbation joke here/then allude to "thoi thong"/by R Kelly/he be pissing on chicks/reminds me of eating spaghetti/reminds me if i have to sit through the Ben's/I'll be fucking pissed/like "please sir, can I have no more"/opposite of Oliver! - twist/I don't even battle y'all like you don't even exist

― christhamrin (christhamrin), Thursday, 8 January 2004 09:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Whateva

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Thursday, 8 January 2004 09:27 (twenty-one years ago)

one year passes...

Sick shit, man.

― Mark (MarkR), Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:44 (twenty years ago)

Dear lord, "dream" and "Rakim" do not rhyme.

Now if we could only do away with the "rhyming" and get all the indies to fight it out in a cage match. Litter the ground with glasses...

― Rob Uptight (Rob Uptight), Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:51 (twenty years ago)

fourteen years pass...

fitebitch.antville.org

― When I am afraid, I put my toast in you (Neanderthal), Friday, 20 September 2019 17:51 (six years ago)

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