Dumb Stuff You Can't Take Into Concerts Anymore

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So last Saturday I went to see Wilco play in Downtown Houston at the Verizon. Even though I’m not the most avid concert-goer (this was my first Verizon gig in 6 ½ years), I still thought I had a good handle on what I can and can’t take into a show. So I was more than a little surprised that—when I showed the contents of my pockets to security—WRITING UTENSILS (PENS, PENCILS ETC) ARE NOW CONSIDERED CONTRABAND.

Why? Did I miss a memo or something? Was somebody stabbed with a Dr. Grip?

Anyway, this is a thread about all the dumb stuff you can’t take into concerts anymore, and any fun or ludicrous stories you have about same.

PS. I had to give up a pen and a mechanical pencil.

― Doobie Keebler (Charles McCain), Monday, 25 April 2005 20:05 (twenty years ago)

Ultimately all concerts will have to be attended naked.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 25 April 2005 20:10 (twenty years ago)

...but you'll have to leave your penises and breasts at the door.

― fact checking cuz (fcc), Monday, 25 April 2005 20:10 (twenty years ago)

When I went to see Chaki play at the club Good Hurt in Mar Vista, L.A., the security guards told me to go put my backpack back in my car... I told them I didn't have a car.

They literally paused for three minutes.

Chaki had to yell at the guys and tell them it was cool, and then they let me in.

Many mid-to-big sized venues in Seattle have bag checks, where you pay $3 or so to have someone hold your backpack/possessions for you. I used to think this was a rip-off, but then I thought, if the alternative is to go ALL THE WAY HOME to return my shit, I'll pay the $3.. also, you can buy merch in between and go to the bag check folks and they'll store it for you too.

So, basically.. Bag Checks = ace.

― donut debonair (donut), Monday, 25 April 2005 20:14 (twenty years ago)

The last time I tried to get into a Kaiser Chiefs gig, I wasn't even allowed to take my AK47.

― Failin Huxley (noodle vague), Monday, 25 April 2005 21:12 (twenty years ago)

Went to a Neil Young concert with a NO CELLPHONES policy.
I can understand not want rings going off during an aucostic set, but why didn't he ban LOUDMOUTH FANS WHO TALK THROUGH THE ENTIRE SET?

― The Sensational Sulk (sexyDancer), Monday, 25 April 2005 21:30 (twenty years ago)

Failin beat me to it!

― ken taylrr (ken taylrr), Monday, 25 April 2005 21:33 (twenty years ago)

no cellphones would put an end to the whole "hold my phone up and record the one song I came to hear" thing. i can't stand that. hold it up and take a photo? fine. hold it up and bootleg a song so i gotta watch your hand in the air for 4 minutes? no thanks.

― gspm (gspm), Monday, 25 April 2005 21:46 (twenty years ago)

when i saw radiohead at liberty state park they confiscated:

my 2 water bottles
my sandwich
my BLANKET that i was planning on sitting on (what was i gonna do, cut up pieces of it and use it roll joints?)

― joseph (joseph), Monday, 25 April 2005 22:30 (twenty years ago)

xpost
that infuriates ME. WTF! Your blanket? and fuck not being able to bring water, sandwhiches maybe...no fuck that and the shitty hot dogs or whatever they were probably selling. Damnit!

― jmeister (jmeister), Monday, 25 April 2005 22:53 (twenty years ago)

Umbrellas at my place of employment (the local arena), even if it's raining.

― Ian Riese-Moraine has a grenade, that pineapple's not just a toy! (Eastern Mantr, Monday, 25 April 2005 23:14 (twenty years ago)

It was understandable when Dick Cheney spoke last spring at the Florida State graduation (oh, trust me, that didn't go over well at all here), but at a fucking off-Broadway play with only 1,500 people in attendance and most of the arena closed off? Christ...

― Ian Riese-Moraine has a grenade, that pineapple's not just a toy! (Eastern Mantr, Monday, 25 April 2005 23:17 (twenty years ago)

Last time I tried to ride in my litter with my Oompa Loompas carrying it, they had to wait outside until after the show.

― The King of Siam (Big Loud Mountain Ape), Monday, 25 April 2005 23:47 (twenty years ago)

The best shows happen at places where I can (openly) birng my own beer/forty/weed/cheap liqupr/what-have-you.

― Ian John50n (orion), Monday, 25 April 2005 23:50 (twenty years ago)

a lawn chair! when i saw radiohead about two years ago at umb bank pavilion, we were on the lawn, and the ground was wet but they made us take back the lawnchair because they rented them inside, and wanted to make their dirty dirty money. i'm still bitter.

― jonathan - stl (jonathan - stl), Tuesday, 26 April 2005 00:17 (twenty years ago)

I walked by the Key Arena tonight where U2 was playing a second show.. and this guy leaves the place all pissed off yelling "I CAN'T believe they wouldn't let me FUCKIN' IN!"... The guy was trying to bring an acoustic guitar inside the venue.

― donut debonair (donut), Tuesday, 26 April 2005 07:25 (twenty years ago)

im gonna start just sellotaping stuff to my ass.

― Hari A$hur$t (Toaster), Tuesday, 26 April 2005 07:49 (twenty years ago)

put your weed underneath your balls

― The Sensational Sulk (sexyDancer), Tuesday, 26 April 2005 14:45 (twenty years ago)

Hang outside and drink and smoke to yr heart's content, cheap too

― A Viking of Some Note (Andrew Thames), Tuesday, 26 April 2005 14:47 (twenty years ago)

Or just stuff the acoustic guitar up your rectum

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 26 April 2005 14:47 (twenty years ago)

Now there's a good heckle if ever I heard one

― Pradaismus (Dada), Tuesday, 26 April 2005 14:49 (twenty years ago)

im gonna start just sellotaping stuff to my ass.

Is this related to concert security or should we just thank you for sharing?

― M. White (Miguelito), Tuesday, 26 April 2005 14:57 (twenty years ago)

ten years pass...

wasn't surprised that wallet chains are being targeted now (I think they're dumb anyway - last time I just left my chain there as it'd come with the wallet I wanted but I never used it).

But as much as I see the security as imperfect and annoying, it does wig me out how little there is at most metal shows I go to. I wasn't patted down or so much checked to see if I had anything under my hat at like my last five shows.

what if I nunchucked the entire moshpit at Slayer?

― Hammer Smashed Bagels, Sunday, 3 May 2015 16:15 (ten years ago)

So nunchucks are ok but you hang up one little cross behind the band...

― Siegbran, Sunday, 3 May 2015 16:45 (ten years ago)

Couldn't take chewing gum into the Brixton Academy. Fucks sake, why?

― kraudive, Sunday, 3 May 2015 20:10 (ten years ago)

yeah same at another Academy venue. Guess it gets stuck everywhere.

― kinder, Sunday, 3 May 2015 20:26 (ten years ago)

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