What's the new Garbage LP like then?

In my younger and more vulnerable years I wrote a review in which I claimed Version 2.0 was the "Parallel Lines" of the '90s.

Somebody needs to shatter this eventually so can I just point out that Parallel Lines is nowhere near as good as Eat to the Beat?

I was excited cuz I don't have the first two albums and have had a hankering to hear "Vow" these days. I like the first two tracks but goes downhill faaaaast.

Eat To The Beat >>> Garbage

You'd be hard pressed to find a bigger Garbage fanboy than me. This is what I think:

Bad Boyfriend: Needless riffage = not a good sound for sleek, sexy electro-rock band. Good singing but particularly bad lyrics on this one - the lyrics were better when the whole band wrote them, though Beautifulgarbage was occasionally interesting and revealing. Actually sounds a bit like "Suffocate Me" by Angelfish!

Run Baby Run: One of the better songs, definitely, like a more amped-up "Breaking Up The Girl", verses a bit dull but chorus works, which is more than can be said for lots of the songs on this.

Right Between The Eyes: Second-best song, at least for the first three minutes. Pleasantly uncluttered, just enough guitar to work, excellent chorus. The end, though, doesn't work. Yes, Shirley, you're an awfully good singer now, that doesn't mean you should wail aimlessly over the end of an otherwise good song. Radio edit this one down and make it a single.

Why Do You Love Me: "I'm not your baby girl". Lyrical nadir. She sounds like Aimee Mann in the quiet bit and tries to sound like Courtney at other times. Not entirely successful, the fact that this has been their biggest hit in eight years is just encouraging them. Stop it.

Bleed Like Me: Hands down the worst thing they've ever done. Just embarrassing. In addition to not being Courtney Love, Shirley is also not Siouxsie, even she couldn't have pulled this off. Hate the backing vocals over the end of it.

Metal Heart: Not bad, sort of like a shorter, sharper "Hammering In My Head", quite a pulsating, nagging chorus. You can almost believe that this is the same band who once got the dynamics of electro in their plastic pop-rock JUST right ca "Version 2.0". Okay, it doesn't precisely go anywhere, but it's not bad.

Sex Is Not The Enemy: Singled out by Pitchfork as the worst song. No, this at least has some hooks on it. Distort voice LESS, Shirley, aren't you supposed to be an organic rock band? But, at least the guitars on this chime and sway over the place in a vaguely melodic fashion, so you can forgive the rather crap lyrics.

It's All Over But The Crying: The clear stand-out, the only song that is even of comparable quality to their earlier work. Okay, I liked it a bit more when it was called "Medication", but still, a well-paced, well-executed slowie. Garbage's ballads are underrated, this is certainly no "You Look So Fine", but lovely.

Boys Wanna Fight: Too rough-edged. Didn't they get the memo that the worst song on all of their previous albums is ALWAYS the loudest, ugliest rock track (cf "Dog New Tricks", "Dumb", "Silence Is Golden), but this one at least has a decent groove and some interesting dynamics. It's just that, again, Garbage were not built to make clattering rock songs. I like the way Shirley sings "loaded" - good ending saves it.

Why Don't You Come Over: Hookless, but at least nimbly-paced rocker. Repeating title over boring riff in chorus, NOT FUN.

Happy Home: The final nail in the rockist coffin. Yes, what every band needs to do is have more six-minute closers to eleven-track albums, just like albums are supposed to be. No, this isn't rockism. This is a n exaggerated caricature of a rockist album closer. The ah-ah-ah bits in the middle are nice, but texturally, it's just so boring otherwise.

Yes, it's a complete letdown. NOT a return to the debut album at all. Maybe four or five tracks worth keeping. Strangely, the B-sides to the single aren't bad at all.

Thanks for the play-by-play dude! Made me decide to give it a second spin.

It's not the complete unlistenable horror-fest I initially thought, but given how LONG the gap between albums is, it's pretty bereft of interesting ideas. I can understand a gap of 3 years between V2.0 and Beautiful because that album is pretty packed with interesting sonic touches and the songs are quite adventurous - I like to imagine some of those songs would have been massive pop hits if they'd come out in 2004 with the name "Gwen Stefani" on them. (Imagine Gwen doing "Cherry Lips" or "Can't Cry These Tears", they'd be massive)