So Nick Cannon's new song consists of the full-grown ghost of his potential self singing to his mom, asking her not to abort him?

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I mean, seriously?

― Hillary Brown (Hillary Brown), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:15 (twenty years ago)

yes. it's creepy as hell. it reminds me of that Christian propaganda record that made the rounds on the internet a few years ago with a baby's voice (or rather an adult man's voice manipulated to squeaky high pitch) singing "mommy, please don't kill me".

― Al (sitcom), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:19 (twenty years ago)

[Talking]
Talking Ma
I know the Situation is Personal
But it something that has to be told
As I was making this beat
You was all I could think about you heard my voice

[Verse 1]
Yeah Just think Just Think
What if you could Just
Just blink your self away..
Just Just wait just pause for a second
Let me plead my case
It's the late 70's Huh
You Seventeen huh
And having me that will ruin everything huh
It's alot of angels waiting on their wings
You see me in your sleep so you cant kill your dreams
300 Dollars thats the price of living what?
Mommy I dont like this clinic
Hopefully you'll make the right decision
And dont go through with the Knife incision
But it's hard to make the right move
When you in high school
How you have to work all day and take night school
Hopping off da bus when the rain is pouring
What you want morning sickness or the sickness of mourning

[Chorus]
I'll Always Be a part of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE
I'll Always Be a part of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE

[Verse 2]
I am a child of the king
Ain't no need to go fear me
And I see the flowing tears so know that you hear me
When I move in your womb that's me being scary
Cause who knows what my future holds
Yo the truth be told you ain't told a soul
Yo you ain't even showing I'm just 2 months old
Through your clothes try to hide me deny me
Went up 3 sizes
Your pride got you lying saying ain't nothing but a migraine
It ain't surprising you not trying to be in Wic food lines
Your friends will look at you funny but look at you mommy
That's a life inside you look at your tummy
What is becoming ma I am Oprah bound
You can tell he's a star from the Ultrasound
Our Sprits Connected Doors Open Now
Nothing But Love And Respect Thanks For Holding Me Down She Let Me Live...

[Chorus]
I'll Always Be a part of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE
I'll Always Be apart of you
Trust Your Soul Know it's always true
If I Could Talk I'd Say To You
CAN I LIVE
CAN I LIVE
[Repeat 2]

[Nick Talking]

It's uplifting foreal yall
I ain't passing no judgement
Ain't making no decisions
I am just telling ya'll my story
I love life
I love my mother for giving me life
We all need to appreciate life
A strong woman that had to make a sacrifice
Thanks for listening
Thanks for listening
Mama thanks for listening

― miccio (miccio), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:19 (twenty years ago)

also it annoys me that he used the title of one of my favorite Jay-Z songs ever.

― Al (sitcom), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:22 (twenty years ago)

I am a child of the king
Ain't no need to go fear me
And I see the flowing tears so know that you hear me
When I move in your womb that's me being scary

If Ice Cube sang this couplet it would have a totally different meaning.

― miccio (miccio), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:22 (twenty years ago)

hahahaha

― Al (sitcom), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:23 (twenty years ago)

Ah, so true, Al. I knew it was ringing bells somewhere. I don't know if this is more or less creepy, though. Less because it's not a terrible song, and he's kind of nice at the end with his whole "I ain't passing no judgment" thing, but more because this is obviously going to get played on the radio.

― Hillary Brown (Hillary Brown), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:23 (twenty years ago)

Man, I'm so with Dave Chappelle on this guy

― Zack Richardson (teenagequiet), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:25 (twenty years ago)

Mommy I dont like this clinic
Hopefully you'll make the right decision
And dont go through with the Knife incision

― miccio (miccio), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:25 (twenty years ago)

MUMMY... I'M NOT AN ANIMAL-AH!

― Boring Satanic Space Jazz (sexyDancer), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:25 (twenty years ago)

I don't know, is it? the only time he ever got on the radio before was w/ R. Kelly. this was on the 106&Park countdown for a while a couple months ago but I haven't heard it on the radio at all.

(xpost reply to Hillary)

(haha man I was just about to talk about the voice he uses when he says "Mommy, I don't like this clinic")

― Al (sitcom), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:26 (twenty years ago)

Maybe not a big radio hit, but this at least has a chance compared to scary chipmunk Christian song.

― Hillary Brown (Hillary Brown), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:28 (twenty years ago)

That's a life inside you look at your tummy
What is becoming ma I am Oprah bound

This reference would be lost to Nick Cannon's mother in 1980.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:34 (twenty years ago)

He could have mentioned his hot snare drum chops as part of his argument.

― Jordan (Jordan), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:36 (twenty years ago)

btw, what was that scary Christian song called anyway? I'm totally blanking on the title. (xp)

― Al (sitcom), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:40 (twenty years ago)

Mommy, please don't kill me cuz I'm gonna be rich
I got a taste for the camera after Maury Povich

― miccio (miccio), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:40 (twenty years ago)

MICCIO STOP QUOTING ALL THE ROFFLES

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:40 (twenty years ago)

He should have created an outline, that way his argument would be much clearer and more focused.

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:41 (twenty years ago)

If you do have me killed, put the fetus in a jar
so they throw me at the doctor when they shoot him in his car

― miccio (miccio), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:43 (twenty years ago)

also it annoys me that he used the title of one of my favorite Jay-Z songs ever.

My favorite Jay-Z song is also called "Mommy Please Don't Kill Me"

― michael burble, Friday, 29 July 2005 18:45 (twenty years ago)

Your friends will look at you funny but look at you mommy
That's a life inside you look at your tummy

― The Ghost of LOOK AT YOUR TUMMY, DAMN YOU (Dan Perry), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:46 (twenty years ago)

You see me in your sleep so you cant kill your dreams

― miccio (miccio), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:46 (twenty years ago)

My life is so precious, won't you let this egg hatch
you'll regret it if the doctor puts the vacuum in your snatch

― miccio (miccio), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:47 (twenty years ago)

"Diary of an Unborn Child." By Li'l Markie. I sitll want to cover that.

― Eppy (Eppy), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:47 (twenty years ago)

that's it! thank you.

― Al (sitcom), Friday, 29 July 2005 18:51 (twenty years ago)

ABORT! ABORT! ABORT!

― Rob Upt1ght., Friday, 29 July 2005 19:00 (twenty years ago)

Mothers don't let your babies grow up to be Nick Cannon.

― miccio (miccio), Friday, 29 July 2005 19:03 (twenty years ago)

Mothers don't let your babies grow up.

― michael burble, Friday, 29 July 2005 19:28 (twenty years ago)

This song is an abortion.

― Whiney G. Weingarten (whineyg), Friday, 29 July 2005 19:43 (twenty years ago)

Miccio ON FIRE.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Friday, 29 July 2005 19:44 (twenty years ago)

desde el cielo vine a aqui
por hacerte my feliz
no me rechazes
soy tu hiiiiiijooooo
madre dejame vivir
la vida no me quites, dejame vivir
no intentes impedir que vaya a nacer
tuyo quiero ser

Oh dejame vivir (dejalo vivir)
la vida no me quites, dejame vivir (dejalo vivir)
quiero vivir mi vida madre ya veras
si la oportunidad me das
que al tenerme entre tus brazos
a amarme aprenderas

-Los Yonics, circa 1990 I think, Mexican pop was years ahead of this game

― Banana Nutrament (ghostface), Friday, 29 July 2005 20:06 (twenty years ago)

Miccio's rocking this thread.

And I want to slap Nick Cannon even more than I did when that hideous "Gigolo" song came out. Did he get a fucking presidential grant to record this? He is so passing judgment: "Hopefully you'll make the right decision / And don't go through with the Knife incision."

Sigh.

P.S. Seals & Crofts was 17 years ahead of Los Yonics with this theme.

― Joseph McCombs (Joseph McCombs), Friday, 29 July 2005 20:06 (twenty years ago)

Lyrics please Joseph!

― Banana Nutrament (ghostface), Friday, 29 July 2005 20:09 (twenty years ago)

whenever I'm in the booth and i get exhausted
i think what if marie banker got that abortion
i love ya ma'

― jermaine (jnoble), Friday, 29 July 2005 20:17 (twenty years ago)

http://www.oldielyrics.com/lyrics/seals_crofts/unborn_child.html

SEALS & CROFTS lyrics - "Unborn Child"

(Lyrics by Lana Bogan; music by James Seals, 1974)

Oh little baby, you'll never cry, nor will you hear a sweet lullabye.

Oh unborn child, if you only knew just what your momma was plannin' to do.
You're still a-clingin' to the tree of life, but soon you'll be cut off before you get ripe.
Oh unborn child, beginning to grow inside your momma, but you'll never know.
Oh tiny bud, that grows in the womb, only to be crushed before you can bloom.

Mama stop! Turn around, go back, think it over.
Now stop, turn around, go back, think it over.
Stop, turn around, go back think it over.

Oh no momma, just let it be. You'll never regret it, just wait and see.
Think of all the great ones who gave everything
That we might have life here, so please bear the pain.

Mama stop! Turn around, go back, think it over.
Now stop, turn around, go back, think it over.
Stop, turn around, go back think it over.

― Joseph McCombs (Joseph McCombs), Friday, 29 July 2005 20:22 (twenty years ago)

that is revolting! how come more people don't know about that? why did anyone like Seals & Crofts? I always confuse them with the HR PUffinstuff people

― kyle (akmonday), Friday, 29 July 2005 20:35 (twenty years ago)

summer breeze! makes me feel fine
'cept when I'm rememb'rin' that a-
booooooortion

[i]deer-na-neer-neer-na-neer[/i]

― Banana Nutrament (ghostface), Friday, 29 July 2005 21:03 (twenty years ago)

damn tags

― Banana Nutrament (ghostface), Friday, 29 July 2005 21:11 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, a co-worker forwarded me this. It's funny for its sheer unspeakableness, but those laughs wear off pretty quickly. For me, anyway.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 29 July 2005 21:29 (twenty years ago)

Word on the street is that we can expect a rebuttal diss track from his mom.

― Dr. Glen Y. Abreu (dr g), Friday, 29 July 2005 22:07 (twenty years ago)

and another from the surgeon whose game this wack fetus keeps hatin' on

― Banana Nutrament (ghostface), Friday, 29 July 2005 22:12 (twenty years ago)

Anyone want to YSI this? (I'm afraid slsk would be flooded with scratched versions)

― Cunga (Cunga), Friday, 29 July 2005 23:55 (twenty years ago)

yeah, nick cannon is so deep.

― Christopher Costello (CGC), Saturday, 30 July 2005 00:36 (twenty years ago)

Hahahaha, that's seriously riiculous

― Tokyo Ghost Stories (Tokyo Ghost Stories), Saturday, 30 July 2005 03:28 (twenty years ago)

"If you do have me killed, put the fetus in a jar
so they throw me at the doctor when they shoot him in his car"

This is cracking me up every time I think about it.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Saturday, 30 July 2005 03:48 (twenty years ago)

yeh, hard not to think about the humor value of people getting gunned down. heh heh.

― michael burble, Saturday, 30 July 2005 08:17 (twenty years ago)

my fetus thinks this song sucks.

― teeny (teeny), Saturday, 30 July 2005 13:39 (twenty years ago)

Teeny, you win the internet today!

― Tantrum The Cat (Tantrum The Cat), Saturday, 30 July 2005 14:12 (twenty years ago)

greg cannon has something v. similar, though better written and more cryptic, on the country charts ight now

― anthony easton (anthony), Sunday, 31 July 2005 13:10 (twenty years ago)

This thread is leaving me paralytic.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 31 July 2005 13:12 (twenty years ago)

I think its a beautiful song of hope for children. Children that could have been your best friend, your brother, your sister. No "Christian propaganda", just one of the only people in music being a voice for those without & saying "I love my mother for giving me life."

― dabby luke, Saturday, 13 August 2005 00:48 (twenty years ago)

I think it's a steaming pile of shit.

― The Ghost of Black Elegance (Dan Perry), Sunday, 14 August 2005 02:22 (twenty years ago)

two weeks pass...

You obviously have some serious issues if you can call the right to life a "serious pile of shit". EVERY ONE has the right to live.... even an unborn child. You're a fucking pussy if you can't even put your real name beneath your comment. If you have something to say, have the balls to stand behind! By not putting your name, your showing that you have a guilty concience, just like every other pro choice person should. Pro choice is a bunch of bullshit, and you all should be ashamed.

― Callie Hughes, Monday, 29 August 2005 01:34 (twenty years ago)

My mother, Mrs. Nutrament, gave me the family name, and she told me to tell you to just eat my ass out raw if you don't like it. I will have the room lit tastefully for the occasion and some Nick Cannon pumping on the stereo. Afterwards, we can share our visions of a post-Christian future. There will also be refreshments.

― Banana Nutrament (ghostface), Monday, 29 August 2005 01:49 (twenty years ago)

Hello Calliebelle90!

Just a quick question...when y'all pro-life yokels shoot an female abortion doctor, do you check to make sure that she isn't pregnant? Or do you just shoot for the head and hope for the best?

Cuddles!

― John Justen (johnjusten), Monday, 29 August 2005 02:01 (twenty years ago)

Every pro-lifer should be forced to adopt an unwanted crack baby.

― Mr. Snrub (Mr. Snrub), Monday, 29 August 2005 02:09 (twenty years ago)

Better yet, have one forcibly shoved into their womb...or surgically implanted into whatever male equivalent the doctor chooses.

― John Justen (johnjusten), Monday, 29 August 2005 02:16 (twenty years ago)

> EVERY ONE has the right to live

Except us faggots and non-Christians. Oh yeah, and the president of Venezuela.

― Joseph McCombs (Joseph McCombs), Monday, 29 August 2005 02:30 (twenty years ago)

I finally saw the video to this. Me and the girl sat slackjawed then, as if in slo-mo, switched the channel.
And shame on you Anthony Hamilton, for attempting to provide this with yet MORE gravitas!

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Monday, 29 August 2005 05:37 (twenty years ago)

Every pro-lifer should be forced to adopt an unwanted crack baby.

And every person against slavery should've seen how far illiterate, uneducated blacks went when they were freed (not far). The fact that freeing the slaves often made it worse than keeping them didn't osbcure the fact that slavery as an institution was pretty wicked.

― Cunga (Cunga), Monday, 29 August 2005 05:53 (twenty years ago)

Who needs Li'l Markie?

― js (honestengine), Monday, 29 August 2005 21:07 (twenty years ago)

"And every person against slavery should've seen how far illiterate, uneducated blacks went when they were freed (not far). The fact that freeing the slaves often made it worse than keeping them didn't osbcure the fact that slavery as an institution was pretty wicked."

Wow. This thread got stupid quick.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Monday, 29 August 2005 21:09 (twenty years ago)

Cunga, are you seriously jockeying for The Dumbest ILM Poster By A Gigantic Fuckoff Margin Award or something?

― The Ghost of Black Elegance (Dan Perry), Monday, 29 August 2005 21:13 (twenty years ago)

And the most clueless random googler EVAH award goes to . . . Callie Hughes!

― J (Jay), Monday, 29 August 2005 21:13 (twenty years ago)

And yet Callie STILL managed to not be as staggeringly offensive for no discernable reason as Cunga!

― The Ghost of Black Elegance (Dan Perry), Monday, 29 August 2005 21:15 (twenty years ago)

say, Callie, do you think that having some well-funded programs for pre- and post-natal care for poor people would be a good idea? After all, not only would it help more babies to be born, it helps them stay alive!

― kingfish 'doublescoop' moose tracks (kingfish 2.0), Monday, 29 August 2005 22:36 (twenty years ago)

Cunga, are you seriously jockeying for The Dumbest ILM Poster By A Gigantic Fuckoff Margin Award or something?

sorry

― Cunga (Cunga), Monday, 29 August 2005 23:38 (twenty years ago)

eight months pass...

Well done!
[url=http://dkswjezd.com/hute/qbxc.html]My homepage[/url] | [url=http://dvoruzsj.com/qjkv/cxcl.html]Cool site[/url]

― Troy, Saturday, 6 May 2006 11:06 (nineteen years ago)

this thread fucking ruled

― Thomas Tallis (Tommy), Saturday, 6 May 2006 12:35 (nineteen years ago)

one year passes...

Funniest ILM thread ever?

― John Justen, Friday, 3 August 2007 02:09 (eighteen years ago)

If you do have me killed, put the fetus in a jar
so they throw me at the doctor when they shoot him in his car
-- miccio (miccio), Friday, July 29, 2005 6:43 PM (2 years ago)

Funniest thing on ILX ever?

― John Justen, Friday, 3 August 2007 02:12 (eighteen years ago)

I am a child of the king
Ain't no need to go fear me
And I see the flowing tears so know that you hear me
When I move in your womb that's me being scary

If Ice Cube sang this couplet it would have a totally different meaning.

-- miccio (miccio), Friday, July 29, 2005 6:22 PM (2 years ago) Bookmark Link

i miss miccio:-(

― latebloomer, Friday, 3 August 2007 02:14 (eighteen years ago)

I'm still here! God, I forgot all about this.

― da croupier, Friday, 3 August 2007 02:40 (eighteen years ago)

Just so you know, I still quote your "fetus in a jar" couplet to people on a regular basis. I'll try to credit you in the future.

― John Justen, Friday, 3 August 2007 02:53 (eighteen years ago)

haha! awesome.

― da croupier, Friday, 3 August 2007 03:09 (eighteen years ago)

two months pass...

I had to google search to find this thread. the fetus in a jar couplet is one of the greatest things I have ever read.

― horseshoe, Thursday, 11 October 2007 06:41 (eighteen years ago)

amazing

― Davey D, Thursday, 11 October 2007 07:55 (eighteen years ago)

i can't believe that for the longest time i didn't realize that da croupier was miccio!

― latebloomer, Thursday, 11 October 2007 10:46 (eighteen years ago)

and yes, that rhyme was awesome. one for the ages.

― latebloomer, Thursday, 11 October 2007 10:46 (eighteen years ago)

fetus in jar rhyme - still funniest thing ever said on ILX. maybe on planet.

― John Justen, Thursday, 11 October 2007 21:36 (eighteen years ago)

three years pass...

fyi Nick Cannon has written another song about unborn children:

http://www.okmagazine.com/2011/04/nick-cannon-sings-a-rap-song-filled-with-advice-for-his-twins/

― steendriving is very bad - but I got a fake ID though! (some dude), Sunday, 17 April 2011 14:36 (fourteen years ago)

four years pass...

http://f.cl.ly/items/3P142a2i2t0R0c1k0h3f/Screen%20Shot%202016-03-17%20at%2023.57.43.png

― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Friday, 18 March 2016 00:00 (nine years ago)

four years pass...

What a fucking idiot.

― Mr. Snrub, Friday, 17 July 2020 16:37 (five years ago)

Cancelled Cannon No Longer Canon

― Lady Antibody (Neanderthal), Friday, 17 July 2020 16:38 (five years ago)

Nick Cannon Wilds Out, Cancelled, Wild 'N Out Cancelled

― The Mandymoorian (Whiney G. Weingarten), Friday, 17 July 2020 16:57 (five years ago)

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