The Last Time I Saw Elvis

The Last Time I Saw Elvis
He was dancing around like a saint
Leaving a room with a fat red girl
and an empty gallon can of paint
He was the king

The Last Time I Saw Elvis
Eating handfulls of No-Doz
Laying naked on a waterbed
with two Little Smokies up his nose
He was the king

The Last Time I Saw Elvis
Being driven in a clown car
Flipping off all the cops in town
All while feeling up Terri Garr
He was a king

The Last Time I Saw Elvis
Pulling on his trouser worm
He had just called in a specialist
to give his pubic hair a perm
He was the king

The Last Time I Saw Elvis
He was tipping the scales at 310
Humping away at well-lubed hot dog buns
in the company of other men
He was the Kinks

The Last Time I Saw Elvis
He was buying clothes at Fashion Bug
He was hoping to change a fifty dollar bill
to get quarters to play Dig-Dug
He was a king

The Last Time I Saw Elvis
On the corner of an envelope
He carried it to my cheating girlfriend who
was living in the heart of Park Slope
He was the king