With all the self-destructive rock out there, the drug bands and the leg hounds, death metal, satanic, shock rock, "rape rock" (are the Mentors this entire genre?) and white power bands attempting to make racism sound cool, where in the bleeding fuck are all the songs about filling the tub with chocolate sauce and having a one-man fondu orgy? If GG Allin can make a catchy tune about wanting to fuck himself "and noone else" and if Gangreen can proudly shout "I'd rather drink than fuck," surely someone can put a cool spin on being a fat slob.
Here's my contribution:
Fuck the biggest loser, you're the biggest loser
choosy moms choose Jif
S'my fuckin' life and I choose this
bacon fat and pork backs fresh from the smoke shack
brown gravy, hashbrowns and a stack of flapjacks
You can keep your beer and you can keep your ludes
keep your love and drugs and sex
give me all your food
Shut your mouth, baby, I don't wanna hear it
get away from my food, I don't want you near it
don't even think about it, you can't have a taste
You'll lose any fingers that come near my plate
and when you run away screamin', I'll fry 'em up and eat 'em
they're finger lickin' good but you'd prob'ly like to keep 'em
― Fatrock, Sunday, 25 December 2005 03:12 (twenty years ago)
forgot the chorus:
I'm a fat fuck
and happy as fuck
to be a fat fuck
I'd rather eat than fuck
― Fatrock, Sunday, 25 December 2005 03:19 (twenty years ago)
I steal all the candy from the serving tray
from any building's entryway that has them on display
I eat from the garbage if I feel the the need
if it looks like something good and I like what I see
I broke into your home and I raided your fridge
I stole all your valuables and this is what I did:
Sold it to the pawn shop
bought a bunch of pork chops
Sold it to the pawn shop
bought a bunch of pork chops
Just like all the others in the neighborhood
If you don't want to be hamburgled, lock your house real good
don't come to me crying, I just don't give a shit
is that something I smell frying, I'm on the trail of it
speaking of trails, I don't want your trail mix
if you wanna save the wales, give me a bag of corn chips
― Fatrock, Sunday, 25 December 2005 03:35 (twenty years ago)