Swayze, Blender Magazines's Mystery Coma Rapper, Anyone heard the hip hop Jandek?

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was reading the newest issue of Blender at the place we were mastering at last nite, and read an interesting article on Swayze, a dude from Camden, NJ, that has apparently been the subject of much speculation because of a song called "Bang" that is apparently the greatest thing since Kool G Rap, sliced bread, ice cream, Jay-Z, and boobies combined.

Anyway, the article is about the writer going to try to find this mysterious character (apparently Swayze rarely makes himself known, sort of hides out in Camden, shunning the attention)...anyway he finally meets him and Swayze is very evasive and noncommittal about talking about his music...

but the big hook is that apparently Swayze was in a coma for 4 months and emerged from the coma as an amazing rapper, with these newfound skills....he claims his "gift" appeared almost like magic.....they interview a doctor that says sometimes comas, while they damage the brain, can unlock hidden powers sometimes, odd things can happen....

....swayze's also apparently involved in the street life, according to the article.....his interview almost reminded me of the time that woman found Jandek....he was real evasive and appeared to not really want people to know who he was...

they talked about his verses on the song Bang as being like genius dropped st8 from heaven, like a new rap genius or something.

all this being, said the way the article was written was really playing up the whole mystery man thing, so it seemed a little..suspicious..too good to be true...

if anyone could post a place where you can find the mp3 for "Bang" his one known song, i couldn't find it...

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:16 (nineteen years ago)

lots of rumors that this is a hoax....

also, in the article said the coma was because of an OD on Adderol.

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:27 (nineteen years ago)

fuck i can't find anything on this....i'm such a sucker for this kinda mythology bullshit.

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 15:51 (nineteen years ago)

YSI?

Heh. Wasn't there a Swayze that was a Puff Daddy protege or something? Maybe I'm misremembering that...

― js (honestengine), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:05 (nineteen years ago)

just like Swayze I'm ghost

― dmr (Renard), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:06 (nineteen years ago)

hmm well I guess that's actually old news, the allhiphop article they reference is from 2005

http://www.allhiphop.com/hiphopnews/?ID=5193

still, this smells really fake

― dmr (Renard), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:11 (nineteen years ago)

I don't have the June issue with the article, but the July issue has a couple letters in response to it. This one is interesting:

After the third reading of the story "Who Is This Man?," I finally realized why preternaturally gifted rapper Swayze's real name sounded so familiar to me--"Clifton Tony" switched around is "Tony Clifton," Andy Kaufman's infamous lounge-singer pseudonym. Are you positive Swayze isn't some already-famous rapper messing with you?

Anyway, sounds like a big hoax to me but Blender would rather make it seem like maybe they were just tricked and not trying to trick other people.

― Alex in Baltimore (Alex in Baltimore), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:13 (nineteen years ago)

hmmm..clifton tony! haha the plot thickens.

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:15 (nineteen years ago)

they have the article online with alleged pictures of the dude

http://www.blender.com/guide/articles.aspx?id=1948

― dmr (Renard), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:22 (nineteen years ago)

I think the most suspect part is that there are quotes from a couple blogs, (Broken Language and Hardly Art, Hardly Garbage), and not only am I pretty sure that the quotes in the article were never said on those blogs, but both are run by people who I think have written for Blender. I'm sure it's complete fiction, but as much as I dislike Blender I'd like to think they wouldn't waste a few pages of an issue on something like this.

― Alex in Baltimore (Alex in Baltimore), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:25 (nineteen years ago)

i found the quote from broken language...couldn't find the hardly art, hardly garbage one...

November 22, 2005

ACTORS LIKE

What's the use of having an improbable, almost unreasonable talent if no one can hear you? You're about as likely to hear Swayze as a Priority-released Ras Kass album. Just saying.

Posted by jon at November 22, 2005 09:09 PM

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:37 (nineteen years ago)

found this (another suspect source from a fuckin GTA forum haha)...

BicentennialMan76
Posted: Jun 19 2006, 00:32

Player Hater

Group: Members
Joined: Jun 19, 2006

This isn't a myth. Swayze is real, as was the interview and what's in it. I'm from Camden and I'm not surprised with how Swayze is handling things. It's a shame, but it could mean his life if he becomes too famous...as with the many other rappers and aspiring artist in Camden, NJ.

In that article, it was mentioned that a drug dealer that pulls in more money than 'the next guy,' faces unwanted attention. That holds true for anybody trying to shine brighter than 'the next guy' here in the city. There's plenty of things to rap about here that are unique to this city...and plenty of rappers and producers here holding back because of the fear that comes with fame.

The mixtape in question is 'local' at best. I've never heard of it, so possibly it was mainly released in North Jersey cities. The only advice is to hold out until he finally decides to release his own product. I've been trying to find 'Bang' too. There isn't a prominant hip-hop scence here in the city for exposer...and for a long time those cats across the bridge (in Philly) weren't interested in Camden rappers. (The underlying tone here is, for the most part, Philly cats don't like Camden and vice-versa.)

After all of the negative attention Camden has gotten over the last few decades, and even moreso since 'The Most Dangerous' label has been put on us, this is refreshing news. I hope he decides to come out, and tell the world the untold stories about Lost City.

Camden, known in the area as the acronym C.M.D. or Country's Most Dangerous, needs a bright spot. for sure.

Hey Swayze, if you need someone to make some hot tracks for ya, holla back!!!

This post has been edited by BicentennialMan76 on Jun 19 2006, 00:52

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:39 (nineteen years ago)

ah, there it is. still, Caramanica is listed on Blender's masthead as a contributor, so he's in on it.

― Alex in Baltimore (Alex in Baltimore), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:43 (nineteen years ago)

the clifton tony thing + the fact that he is called SWAYZE ffs sez this is defly defly a hoax.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:45 (nineteen years ago)

actually, is the print version of the Swayze article even credited to an individual author? it doesn't seem to be on the online page.

― Alex in Baltimore (Alex in Baltimore), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:46 (nineteen years ago)

yeah the name of both the rapper (swayze) and the song (bang) make it pert near impossible to fuckin' google the thing, almost by design? such common phrases that pop up all over fuckin the place, esp. when you add in another search term like "mixtape" or "hip-hop" or "rap" or whatever...

found this comment in a comments section of an XXLmag.com stream of a new Papoose song:

stoneyisland Says:
June 3rd, 2006 at 8:50 am
Pap aint he future, check out a nigga from Camden named Swayze. Nigga could be the G.O.A.T

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:50 (nineteen years ago)

Patrick Swayze - Patrick Swayze to release rap songPatrick Swayze The 'Dirty Dancing' star is said to be planning to record a hip-hop track and could release it later this year.
www.femalefirst.co.uk/celebrity/79622004.htm - 19k - Cached - Similar pages

― deej.. (deej..), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:52 (nineteen years ago)

the clifton tony thing

yeah that's the clincher

― dmr (Renard), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:52 (nineteen years ago)

also as someone pointed out SWAYZE=GHOST>

GHOST.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:52 (nineteen years ago)

ROADHOUSE

― David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:54 (nineteen years ago)

They mentioned that in the article.

xpost (the Swayze-was-in-Ghost thing)

― you can email me if you wish to challenge the truth (nickalicious), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:54 (nineteen years ago)

Google cache says the Blender article was written by.... hey, Nick Sylvester!!!

J/K

― Edward III (edward iii), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:55 (nineteen years ago)

my swayze / ghost post was a link to that thing deej just posted

http://katia.cabaretvoltaire.com/blog/imagens/tonyclifton.jpg

CAMDEN'S MOST WANTED

― dmr (Renard), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 16:56 (nineteen years ago)

While being a hoax for the sake of roffs, this might also function as a publicity vehicle for some well known rapper's new "secret identity".

― you can email me if you wish to challenge the truth (nickalicious), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 17:00 (nineteen years ago)

Clifton Toney = Pretty Toney?

Swayze = Ghost(face)?

― dmr (Renard), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 17:03 (nineteen years ago)

It's not too much of a stretch to imagine this line...

“A city undead by the Delaware bred the basis/Put fear in the faces …”

...to be a Ghostface one.

― you can email me if you wish to challenge the truth (nickalicious), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 17:06 (nineteen years ago)

didn't Q magazine recently do this 'invent a band on the web' scam recently ..

though reading that article i would really like all this to be true ..

― mark e (mark e), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 17:08 (nineteen years ago)

did a search on the "new highland institute for neurocognitive research" and the "dr. benedict bruner" that they talk to about the coma in the article....no results (except for the blender article)

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 18:00 (nineteen years ago)

It's not too much of a stretch to imagine this line...
“A city undead by the Delaware bred the basis/Put fear in the faces …”

...to be a Ghostface one.

also, in the actual article, he spells it Clifton TonEY like "Pretty Toney".

this is retarded why am i so fascinated by this???

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 18:01 (nineteen years ago)

WE ARE PLAYING RIGHT INTO THEIR HANDS

― dmr (Renard), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 18:03 (nineteen years ago)

no shit!

i'm just a pawn in the game! prof. griff warned me about this!!!

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 18:05 (nineteen years ago)

pwnd

― dmr (Renard), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 18:07 (nineteen years ago)

Well, if all it does is lead to me buying yet another Ghostface album, then it's not like teh terrorists have won or anything.

― you can email me if you wish to challenge the truth (nickalicious), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 18:11 (nineteen years ago)

Results 1 - 10 of about 10,300 for ghostface swayze

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

― you can email me if you wish to challenge the truth (nickalicious), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 18:13 (nineteen years ago)

I don't see anything in those Google results out of the ordinary. you could plug pretty much any 2 unrelated celebrities into Google and get the same kind of stuff.

― Alex in Baltimore (Alex in Baltimore), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 18:34 (nineteen years ago)

Wait... so Patrick Swayze is Ghostface? And he's in a coma?

― max (maxreax), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 18:37 (nineteen years ago)

prof. griff warned me about this!!!

WHY DO YOU THINK THEY CALL IT SWAYZE

― Edward III (edward iii), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 18:42 (nineteen years ago)

Um, guys; "Swayze"="Ghost" is an OLD bit of hip hop lingo. Like mid-90's. Didn't Ice Cube use it in Natural Born Killaz?

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 19:00 (nineteen years ago)

And yes, this totally looks like a hoax.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 19:01 (nineteen years ago)

"So pick ya pride up boy, oopsie daisie
See ya! Audi, Ghost, Patrick Swayze"

"Now I'm Swayze, Ghost, the rap host
Who rip shows from coast to coast"

― max (maxreax), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 19:06 (nineteen years ago)

http://members.aol.com/essobmcc/brakbook/tees/m-sg.jpg

― dmr (Renard), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 19:10 (nineteen years ago)

Maybe then "Swayze" is some career ghostwriter's crossover vehicle?

― you can email me if you wish to challenge the truth (nickalicious), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 19:17 (nineteen years ago)

Um, guys; "Swayze"="Ghost" is an OLD bit of hip hop lingo.

i was assuming this was common knowledge.

― M@tt He1geson, Rendolent Ding-Dong (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 19:27 (nineteen years ago)

is the print version of the Swayze article even credited to an individual author?

Chris Norris

― Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Thursday, 29 June 2006 06:32 (nineteen years ago)

http://www.theitcrowd.co.uk/img/cast/chris-morris.jpg

― Ruairi Wirewool (Ruairi Wirewool), Thursday, 29 June 2006 09:35 (nineteen years ago)

four weeks pass...

OMG! i read this article today and at first i completely fell for it all! And then, after trying to look him up on Myspace, unsuccessfully, and then trying to google him and getting nothing but Patrick Swayze's new rap album...it hit me, I GOT GOT!!! Its genius! The average person could make no connection between the names, pseudonames, and references between the evidence that hip hop heads or just people who listen to wu Tang or Ghostface, etc. would automatically understand...its as simple as that. Though a trully amazing artist in my book, i wouldnt call Ghostface Killa the greatest rapper EVER, that is a bit much, and as for Blender magazine, and whoever dubbed this guy (assuming they too fell for this hoax) a genius after one verse should go back to wherever it is they came from and get their head out of their na-na...im open to any suggestions, and also willing to eat my words if he really is a random guy from Jerzee

TERESA

― Theresa Ramirez (TERE505), Friday, 28 July 2006 19:44 (nineteen years ago)

one month passes...

So obvious this is a hoax, for those who asked, the writer is supposedly Chris Norris, don't know if there is any inuendo there. But I could believe the whole Ghostface thing seeing as how he is in there with a direct quote stating "anyone can rap about crack and chicks, this guy uses his brain". The one thing that you should notice in the article is that Blender mag couldn't find his phone number, yet he has Dr. Dre and others calling his house phone. Second, if he is running guns and making so much money doing that that he doesn't need rap, then why was he delivering pizzas to the studio? If you search for the prawjex (lol) mixtape, you find nothing. The Rushin song was made by J-Kay and Slaya (K-Slay anybody?). Search for those rappers and you will come up with nothing. I think it is more of a parody on hip-hop, almost like a statement to those that say they are the greatest rappers of all time. This is saying that the greratest rapper of all time, may be out there, and not even pursuing a career in it. It's like a who is the greatest rapper of all time type of thing, is it one of these industry rappers, or just some kid on the street that you will never know? I think Blender was quite clever for coming up with the concept personally. It's almost like a challenge to the reader. Are you the greatest rapper of all time? Or even a challenge to the idea of a greatest rapper of all time, like that idea of a g.o.a.t is Swayze, a ghost, a myth. However you interpret it, it was a great rouse, and every body who read it obviously fell for it for a least for a split-second.

― B Han (sagadg1), Monday, 28 August 2006 03:39 (nineteen years ago)

I forgot all about this.

Thankfully.

― Whiney G. Weingarten (whineyg), Monday, 28 August 2006 04:39 (nineteen years ago)

The lyrical reference to Regarding Henry was too good to be true.

― Zwan (miccio), Monday, 28 August 2006 04:47 (nineteen years ago)

I'm still kinda disappointed that this isn't really a hip-hop version of Jandek, e.g., "You Painted Your Grill."

― clotpoll (Clotpoll), Monday, 28 August 2006 04:51 (nineteen years ago)

i want to believe.

― grady (grady), Monday, 28 August 2006 18:42 (nineteen years ago)

me too.

― M@tt He1geson: Real Name, No Gimmicks (Matt Helgeson), Tuesday, 29 August 2006 14:55 (nineteen years ago)

one year passes...

i want to believe.

-- grady (grady), Monday, August 28, 2006 6:42 P

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Wednesday, 13 February 2008 22:47 (eighteen years ago)

no doubt

― M@tt He1ges0n, Wednesday, 13 February 2008 23:01 (eighteen years ago)

three years pass...

anyone have a copy of the original Blender article? its gone from what's left of their site.

― gr8080, Friday, 18 March 2011 21:56 (fifteen years ago)

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