quit your job, change the hold music

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I have an interesting opportunity to change the music for people on hold at the company I am soon to be leaving. Ideas? I was thinking either really really sad and long songs like "New York Mining Disaster" by the Bee Gees or "Nothing Matters when we're Dancing" by the Magnetic fields. Tell me what you think and why I should choose songs like that.

― Mandorf (mandorf), Monday, 7 August 2006 19:17 (nineteen years ago)

There's a thread about Wolf Eyes doing the rounds today, and I can't see any further than them to be honest.

― Louis Jagger (Haberdager), Monday, 7 August 2006 19:20 (nineteen years ago)

i think anything by Chuck Mangione...but also, respondents to this thread should be informed about the conditions of your leaving: I mean, is this on amicable terms? That really will dictate the nature of the song...

― J. Grizzle (trainsmoke), Monday, 7 August 2006 19:29 (nineteen years ago)

I will be leaving with a good reference and in pretty good spirits with everyone. I want it to be subtle, so maybe it won't get changed, but I still want the tunes to be unbearable. People can post what they wish they could put on the tape, but it'd be helpful to hear what might make it under the radar without getting me in hot water.

― Mandorf (mandorf), Monday, 7 August 2006 19:33 (nineteen years ago)

if we had hold music in our office it has always been agreed that it'd be hamburger lady by throbbing gristle. for your purposes the entire berlin album by lou reed.

― simon 803 (simon 803), Monday, 7 August 2006 23:16 (nineteen years ago)

Matchstalk Men and Matchstalk Cats and Dogs by Brian & Michael. There's something so entirely dispiriting about the song. It must have soundtracked some suicides despite being ostensibly rather jaunty and featuring St. Winnifred's School Choir.

― jimnaseum - formalist rigour! (jimnaseum), Monday, 7 August 2006 23:20 (nineteen years ago)

Metal Machine Music, duh.

― It's Rodney, assume the position! (R. J. Greene), Monday, 7 August 2006 23:31 (nineteen years ago)

Lil Markie "Diary of an Unborn Child"

― Marmot (marmotwolof), Monday, 7 August 2006 23:33 (nineteen years ago)

"Music for 18 Musicians." People will stay on hold, entranced, for over an hour, or call back just to get more!

― Josh in Chicago (Josh in Chicago), Monday, 7 August 2006 23:34 (nineteen years ago)

Whitney - One Moment In Time

specifically the interpretation on this album. Note arrangement is Albert Hammond's, the Strokes' member's daddy-oh.

I bet that actually is used as hold music. I'm certain that this is.

But seriously:

Jóhann Jóhannsson - Virðulegu Forsetar
This, just.. doesn't develop and goes nowhere whatsoever, I think it left me in a weird trance. It starts off fine, all sustained solemnity with trumpets and you think it's going to build and build, but it just keeeeeeppsss repeatttinggg. It would be excruciating to have this as hold music or alternatively completely brain numbing.
65 Minutes of it too.

I bet some people like it though.

― Major Alfonso (Major Alfonso), Monday, 7 August 2006 23:43 (nineteen years ago)

Along similar lines, Spacemen 3's 44-minute live 'masterpiece' An Evening Of Contemporary Sitar Music, the most single-mindedly static thing I've heard.

― Louis Jagger (Haberdager), Monday, 7 August 2006 23:46 (nineteen years ago)

Disintegration Loops by William Basinski - perfect for this.

― DougD (DougD), Tuesday, 8 August 2006 00:12 (nineteen years ago)

Alvin Lucier's "I Am Sitting In A Room"
would make people REALLY conscious of the time spent on hold

I also especially like Phill Niblock - "Early Winter", or Tony Conrad - "Four Violins"

― davelus (davelus), Tuesday, 8 August 2006 02:34 (nineteen years ago)

I think that most of you people don't like 'on hold' music enough. If you mentioned Chuck Mangione, then you are a glowing exception.

Basinski? Pbbbzzztthhh.

I'd go with old soul and gospel records. Mahalia Jackson. That'd be sooooo awesome.

― trees (treesessplode), Tuesday, 8 August 2006 05:38 (nineteen years ago)

Steve Reich seconded.

― Whiney G. Weingarten (whineyg), Tuesday, 8 August 2006 05:53 (nineteen years ago)

Steve Reich thirded (from New York to Los Angelessss)

or Merzbow. I think "Farsa Del Buen Vivir" would be AMAAAAZING for like your last 5 minutes at that job.

― less-than three's Christiane F. (drowned in milk), Tuesday, 8 August 2006 06:03 (nineteen years ago)

Spacemen 3's Dreamweapon is a legitimate masterpiece that does not deserve some stupid-ass ironic quotes around it.

I agree w/the Music For 18 Musicians idea. Or Eno's Discreet Music.

― sleeve (sleeve), Tuesday, 8 August 2006 06:24 (nineteen years ago)

Lambchop was once recommended here in a thread about "work-appropriate" music, and I agree now as much as I did then. Your best bets would be "Nixon" and "Is a Woman", probably. Feist would also be nice to be on hold to...

― Ryan J. Collins (Badarts), Tuesday, 8 August 2006 06:41 (nineteen years ago)

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