Awesome Audiophile Snake Oil

lololololol

"The very best sound was obtained when I slightly loosened the screws on the Duplex Covers. And they sound great!!.

8]

lolololol

every product on the site is like New Hope for the Ape-Eared

i love that website! check out this fancy table: http://machinadynamica.com/machina25.htm

it's supposed to isolate your amplifier from vibrations, "especially the 0 -10 Hz variety produced by Earth's crust movement, traffic, subways, tides, etc. "

how a spring could cancel out waves slower than 1 Hz?

but the best is this "teleportation tweak"
http://machinadynamica.com/machina60.htm

everything on there is great but I'm still standing by the Tru-Tone Duplex cover as the most balls-out

http://www.hometheaterhifi.com/volume_12_3/marigo-labs-signature-3d-mat-7-2005.html

oh wait though codename turquoise is pretty fucking rad

Brilliant Pebbles is my favorite one on that site i think

From cidepress' link, this was amusing:

"Where most audiophiles would agree, however, is that tweaks are a minor aspect of system building. Defined by the dictionary in Microsoft Word® as "a slight adjustment or change in..."

italics mine.

http://machinadynamica.com/water.gif for brains

Somewhere, audiophile dude pushes the leather sofa away from the wall, sees four-socket outlet, shrieks.

Well, these are great, but you don't have to spend a lot of money to improve sound:

http://www.belt.demon.co.uk/Free_Techniques/Free_Techniques.html

Holy shit the Teleportation Tweak! We are dealing with <i>balls</i> here, gentlemen. Big, round, shiny balls, of finest brass, lovingly hand-polished to a mirror shine by a taskforce of brilliant Sound Artisans. These balls can be yours for the astonishingly low price of $680 (Big Shiny Brass Balls are not subject to our 30-day money-back guarantee)

it doesn't actually take any courage to be a con man, is the thing. you just have to really, really hate everybody.

The interesting thing about these tweaks is that they abandon the pretense of scientific support. Whereas w/ feet for speaker stands in Stereophile or whatever they'll be some physicist explaining how the damping works, here's it's just like, Hey, put this magic clock in the room and it'll improve the sound. I love it.

Sorry, maybe I'm Billy-doesn't-get-it, but is this site real or an elaborate spoof?

I had initially assumed spoof, but I followed some links and poked around and it appears to be real, or at least elaborate enough a spoof to include three or four different sites. Stereophile had an article on some of these tweaks a few years ago anyway:

http://www.stereophile.com/news/10415/

even if it is a spoof there's certainly enough real snake-oil products with extremely similar purposes/explanations

here's a collection of some more: http://www.ilikejam.dsl.pipex.com/audiophile.htm

i know someone who swears by this ....
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&rd=1&item=280182123367&ssPageName=STRK:MEWA:IT&ih=018

"extremely flat"

I don't even know what "a richer, fuller sound, with less emphasis of detail" means. it's supposed to be a good thing?

My latest tweak = this chair;

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v236/njsouthall/Photo624.jpg

i'm actually buying a glass platter for my turntable. i might even buy that mat for it. i'm a sucka 4 luv.

actually the chair i'm assuming was a joke, but honestly i was suprised how much getting speaker stands and "correctly" positioning my chair i listen in and the speakers in the room made a HUGE difference in how good things sounded.

The chair's totally not a joke; it's expensive and comfortable and easily moved but it's not likely to make me fall asleep in it (no headrest); if I'm comfortable and awake, I can concentrate on listening more. I bought it (almost) with the sole intention of it being a 'headphones' chair.

But yeah, basic physics says position your speakers correctly and sit in the right spot; you simply don't get stereo-imaging without it.

http://www.engadget.com/2008/03/03/audiophiles-cant-tell-the-difference-between-monster-cable-and/

...a coat hanger.

that's AMAZING.
audiophiles are some weird people, man.

actually the chair i'm assuming was a joke, but honestly i was suprised how much getting speaker stands and "correctly" positioning my chair i listen in and the speakers in the room made a HUGE difference in how good things sounded.

-- M@tt He1ges0n, Thursday, December 13, 2007 11:39 PM

totally true

actually properly treating one's room acoustically would probably do a better job than moving your chair and speakers about

is there already a company selling audiophile interior house paint?

because if there is, I should start selling audiophile EXTERIOR house paint.

(xpost)
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/cb/Dbsts2.jpg

I was much, much less impressed with this enormous fucking Naim set-up than I should have been given how much it ought to have cost. Sure it went LOUD, but sound-wise I wouldn't swap it for my own system, I don't think.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v236/njsouthall/IMG_0126.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v236/njsouthall/IMG_0128.jpg

Is it just perspective on that first photo, or are your speakers nearly at shoulder height?

Oh, no - is that a Cyrus CD player? Or tuner? And why isn't everything on Mana shelves? That's why it doesn't sound that good. And has it been on continuously for five years? Another biggie with Naimists. (Seriously, that doesn't look like a great room for those huge - and amazingly ugly - speakers).

What's the turntable - Nottingham Spacedek or something? Oracle Delphi?

mp3s out a old marantz amp someone gave me and 15 y/o bottom of the line cambridge soundworks speakers all day babay

although i did love to read sudiophile magazines when i worked at a bookstore just for the lulz

The speakers are nearly to chest height - I'm 5'8".

The Cyrus is just a DAC for his wireless streaming thing. Dunno what the turntable is. The room is big but odd; it's a loft that used to be three bedrooms. There's a (low) double bed behind the speakers, plus a desk, which is where I slept (not the desk) (although that picture was taken at 6am so sleeping wasn't exactly urgent and key that weekend).

Yeah, I really wish someone had just given me a peek into my co-habiting/flat in communal block/married-with-kids future when I was handing over the moolah for all my gear in 1996-97. I wish I'd just got something good/2nd-hand with a small footprint (Cyrus CD/integrated, ProAc speakers, something like that; maybe a Pro-Ject record deck, old Marantz cassette deck, NAD tuner, cables from Maplin) and STOPPED there. Think of all the photographic gear I could've bought with the money saved if I'd just contracted that particular hobbyist bug a decade earlier!

(Ah, DAC for wireless streaming; the Naim box-stacking is kinda insane - external power supplies for everything. Makes my Audiolab pre/mono arrangement look positively understated).

The speakers are Naim DBLs. They weigh about 15st each. Retail these days at £15k. When he got them, in 2000, they should have been £12k. He got them for £4k cos they were "shop-soiled" - the band he's in had an arrangement with Naim and they'd been using them as a playback set-up when they recorded an album in a country house, and the guitarist's dog had taken a bite out of the bottom corner of one, or something.

I'm kind of glad I've had a brush with stuff that's seriously high-end because it's warned me off a bit. Our flat's not that small, but it's a flat nonetheless, and, you know, I want stuff on the walls and holidays and a new camera and stuff maybe too.

I think my main response to audiophilia these days is that the best way to make your hi-fi sound great is to play better records on it.

actually properly treating one's room acoustically would probably do a better job than moving your chair and speakers about

How so?

the best way to make your hi-fi sound great is to play better records on it.

b i n g o

if anyone is looking for really great speakers that won't break your bank....i bought these about a year ago and couldn't be more pleased with them...they are really surprising given the price and size:

Epos ELS 3 mini monitors:

http://www.musicdirect.com/product/73457

i run them with a Cambridge Audio integrated amp w/Cambridge phono pre-amp.....

My turntable is a Rega P1 -- one thing on that i would recommend is buying a glass platter and also i replaced the original ortofon cartridge with a Denon DL 160 cartridge which is a fucking amazing cartridge for the price...

For CD player I run a really really old NAD one that I got off craigslist for $35...it works pretty well, has a hard time tracking CD-Rs but will play them after awhile (it's from 87 though so I guess there weren't even CD-Rs then)

Post more pics of slobs in garrets seasoned with with ridiculous sound systems and ugly furniture.

I really like the coffee table.

I think my favourite way / place to listen to music these days, rather than the big sofa and NAD / Cambridge Audio / Tannoy / proper rack & stands set-up in the living room, with everything anchored in a nice triangle, blah blah, equidistant from rear walls, speakers toed in, is the hotch-potch system in the back room, with the knackered Marantz CD, 20-year-old Marantz amp, DAC, and diddy Q Acoustics speakers. Cos I have space, peace, my comfy chair, books, headphones, no TV or console to distract.

Those are the kind of speakers you buy to justify having previously bought Monster Cable.

What's the sensitivity rating on those things? It might be all show, but they certainly look like they could bring on an involuntary bowel movement.

Ah !
Ta for the info.

sorry to nerd out but it's actually quite interesting, from the wikipedia for rca connectors, if you've ever had that momentary loud buzz/pop when plugging or unplugging stuff:

When connecting the male into the female, the inner, hot (signal) connection is made before the ground connection has been guaranteed; this often produces a loud buzz if the equipment is active when the connection is made.

The hot signal wire and signal ground provided by an RCA connection implement an unbalanced connection. A true balanced connection is generally preferred in certain applications, particularly professional settings because it allows for the use of long cables while reducing susceptibility to external noise.

also, if audiophiles truly gave a shit they'd just switch everything to xlr connectors / balanced audio since that provides inherent shielding and is what pros use to run audio dozens of feet without that much signal degradation: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Balanced_audio

NB some DAC/amp setups do try to implement a 'fully balanced' signal path, jury's out whether it offers improved audio quality...

here's the full review of the stereo:

so, the tl:dr of this is: IT STILL WORKS AND IT’S AWESOME.

i don’t know technobabble terms with regards to stereo stuff. you’d think i’d know the proper language after years of dj’ing, but nope. so, my best point of reference is guitar gear, mostly pedals. when i try to describe the audio stuff, i’m gonna use guitar pedal references. i’m not doing schtick with that; i genuinely don’t know what i’m talking about. i mean, look at the snake oil i learned on!

there’s a really important piece of relevant personal information to this set of stereo components. it’s “the sad part” as it were, and it does help with some of the exposition of the following `review`, but it’s fairly unpleasant, so it’s going here:

part of the abuse i endured as a small child involved being locked in an isolated basement by myself for 48-72 hours once per week between ages 4-6. the only good thing down there was this stereo, which was plugged in and working. i figured out how to work it because i knew no one was coming back any time soon, and that’s also where i taught myself how to play a record and work the turntable. this explains why i have had so much time to study it over the course of my entire 44 years so far.

i first encountered the carver c-4000 high fidelity control console and its copilot, the carver c-500 high slew rate laboratory standard amplifier, in the early 80s. i call them, collectively, “Si.” pronounced with a long I sound, like you would say the word “sigh”, but absolutely nothing to do with the sentiment of a real sigh. homophones that are proper names are fun anomalies. and it’s not just a name: Si, as far as i’m concerned, is a genuine anomaly.

Si has a lot going on. Si has come and gone from my radar through the years, but always returns in functioning order with diminishing returns. many of Si’s peers and, let’s be honest, imitators have come and gone all along. even to this day. i have no doubt that this is at least 60% because Si is built like a tank. if Si is dropped, you need to worry about the impact point, not Si. i am speaking from experience. please listen to me with respect to this aspect of Si: if you break these components physically, you were angry at Si, or Si’s human keeper, and decided to take very persistent intentional, and repeated actions. Si is not impenetrable, but if this thing breaks, that’s on YOU.

but again: Si has a lot going on. you saw all the buttons in the photos! they all do something, but not in Si’s current shape. if Si were Batman [ED. NOTE: and they very well might be], he would need a trip to the Batcave because he is quite battle scarred; most of Si’s utility belt has exhausted its inventory. in stronger days, the time delay peripheral was a truly enjoyable and fully working toy. with hindsight on my side, i can clearly see it as a gimmicky (maybe even annoying) add-on, the power glove or google glass of the late 70’s hifi world. i’ve tried and tried to get it working again, but like i said in my initial reassessments of Si’s current state, the board that controls all the eqs and peripherals has rust on the soldering. the signal cuts about 20 decibels and is only coming through the left channel if i try to engage any of those features. i have so much more daffy heart-eyed praise for time delay, but i have not actually gotten it to work in over a decade so i can't say any of my research is current in that respect. in those previous research sessions however, time delay was almost always an hours-long engagement and a perfect reason to reassess my favorite records. i definitely believe Si’s deluxe features would still be working if i had been able to do proper maintenance this whole time.

but Si’s base operation is as a stereo playback system. and, in that respect, Si is very happy to still be here. like all components of this age, there is quite a bit of fussiness when needing to adjust wires. connections are cleaned and recleaned, but still sometimes get a little cranky and crackly. nothing permanent, and sometimes Si just needs a few minutes to reorient, and we’re in business. but, on the other side of that, Si is not supposed to be mobile, so once everything is connected and set, you’re good. stereo playback, even without the luxury of Si’s fairly decent bass+treble control for each channel, sounds just as good as ever.

been playing lots of vinyl and cds. haven’t gotten the cassette player out yet, but it will be possible to play tapes again should i need to. the only thing i can’t play are 78s. so that means i’ve also been able to attach Si, indirectly, to the internet for the first time ever. i still have an iPod touch with a ⅛” headphone output, and an RCA->⅛” connection cord. this iPod touch has wifi capability, and the Spotify app. so, the million dollar question is obvious: have i synced up david axelrod on vinyl and streaming, and then used Si’s mode knob to do a side-by-side? of course i have, and idk, seems like streaming just has more treble. still very cool to hear Si proudly broadcast out things like long season and dj muro mixtapes. sounds great, Si!

which brings me to my last point: even though none of Si’s peripherals work anymore, in their day, that was a brilliant way for a listener to interact with their music. some of the buttons still work, but they are kind of like fixed EQ presets that you turn on or off [ED. NOTE: and again: i think probably more happened in the past with those buttons when you had all of the original equipment and the insides were not as corroded as they have become]:
.the output -15db decrease is still a very powerful tool, because Si is a very loud talker! it’s an always on button for me.
.the stereo->mono button works still; it remains to be seen how this will unfold but that’s not something you just get on audio playback equipment anymore. this is clearly awesome. idk how else to articulate how exciting this is for me and i’m intentionally trying to swear less: heck yes mono button!!
.<-3db trim/<800Hz button does something, but not sure what. sorta feels like a one-button compressor. useful if a recording has very boomy bass that you need to temper.
.peak unlimiter and auto-correlator do something, but they sound broken. corresponding knobs do nothing. these are “muffle the sound” knobs at this point, unfortunately.
.the big one that still works is the sonic hologram generator. it’s like a one-button super low delay+reverb combo that gets added to the overall output. the delay is very short; less time than a slapback, but long enough to notice, especially with hiphop or anything with loudly mixed vocals. the reverb is like a `room` mode, but with the mix knob never going past 8 o`clock. when time delay is integrated and working, the sonic hologram generator button throws you into the solar wind properly. very fun button. even without time delay, it adds a very lightly echo-ey perceived extra dimension to the sound that i am finding enhances everything. just now, while typing this, i have the iPod shuffling on my Spotify and Polaris came on; sounds better than it ever has on headphones. the best thing about this button is that, because it kind of “expands” the sound, you don’t need to play anything very loud to get the full spectrum. great feature, tone sweetener, always on.

and that’s pretty much it, kind of looking back. this is a rare opportunity for someone to review a piece of consumer goods that have been truly put to test. this thing has worked my entire life, as long as i have the proper cables and some capable speakers (i mean, Si has dispensed plenty of incompetent speakers along the way too). if i were to give ratings, Si gets the top one. to sum it up simply, just… would i buy another one of these? you bet man, worth every penny.

i know how i sound when i say this, but from the bodily harm-inducing construction to the actual good playback that it still produces, over four decades later, even when it’s technically broken: they really don’t make `em like this anymore. i’m sure with most stereos of similar power in the current day, you wouldn’t even be allowed to connect it to Spotify without paying some sort of fees. and what’s with those sound-altering buttons? those have the potential to be awesome, as evidenced by the hologram button here. i seem to recall an Aiwa bookshelf system from the mid-1990s that had all sorts of similar on-off `hologram` type buttons that completely affected the playback. some of them were akin to that thing that would happen when you would only plug your headphones in part of the way and you got that really aquatic, echoey sound ― something i intentionally learned to do later as a substitute for time delay. that aiwa stereo was rad, too, with all those extra buttons. bring these features back to consumer stereo stuff imo!

balanced connections also run 12 db hotter than unbalanced, resulting in less noise.

Audiophiles Can’t Differentiate Audio Signals Sent Through Copper, Banana, and Mud in Blind Test

Yes!!!!

I think you’ll find plantains give a much cleaner signal than bananas.

Are you talking about Honduran or Panamian plaintains? The former are more expensive but the sound quality is well worth the difference ime

Which will make the music more slippery?

now I want to hear Mick Karn basslines through bananas for that extra slipperiness

slide whistle through octave pedal, next topic

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LQFbN91ULg8

tbf some of those records really do sound better encased in plastic and inaccessible

Correct me if I'm wrong but usually, you can't manufacture collectability like this, right?
Surely the most collectable records are usually ones where they only had enough money to make a few hundred, and then a legend grew up around it?
Instead of delibarately trying to make a collectable from the start like this. There must be exceptions but I can't think of any.

yes, you are absolutely right. the most valuable album I ever owned was an original Fondle En Records press of the first MF Doom album because I bought it new

Musicians and artists, not to mention manufacturers of every stripe, have been producing "limited edition" things for a very long time. Many times it doesn't work at all but it does sometimes work in my experience

A famous example being the White Album numbering scheme. Low numbers are still worth crazy money today

FWIW, Jeff Gold of Record Mecca actually discussed these self-manufactured collectibles on Flagging Down the Double E's:

Ray Padgett: Speaking of auctions, are you involved with the T Bone Burnett thing, Ionic?

Jeff Gold: No, and I’m not a big fan of that. To me those are fake collectibles. You know, “We’re going to manufacture a collectible to sell for a lot of money” rather than something that played a part in the history of Bob Dylan.

RP: Because it was designed to be a collectible? Unlike all this other stuff we’re talking about.

JG: You’re buying something that was made to be a collectible. They can do that with his whole catalog or any other artist’s catalog inexhaustibly. There you’re just buying something literally to brag about, I guess. When I was in the record business, I was one of the innovators of doing limited-edition collectibles to sell. But those were $25 to $50 or something, not a million dollars.

I can’t remember what the first one was [”Blowin’ in the Wind”], but I said, “This is going to leak.”

RP: It leaked immediately.

JG: It leaked immediately! Like the next day.

RP: I don’t know who actually bought it, but it seemed like it was marketed maybe more to art collectors than music nerds. Like the person buying these things might not even be a huge Dylan fan.

JG: Would I rather own the lyric manuscript to “I Want You,” one of my favorite Bob Dylan songs ever, that was written as he was composing the song? To me, that’s true history. Whereas something like that, it’s not the same. I don’t mean to diss anybody, but for me as a collector I’m much more excited about getting something that is a part of the creation of a great piece of art.

(tbf they're discussing something insanely expensive, but it gives a little insight into a collector's mindset and how varies - i.e. the balance between an interest in history or rarity for rarity's sake.

*how it varies

There you’re just buying something literally to brag about, I guess.

I mean, come one, it's not like record collectors don't do this anyway. You can argue if you want about whether a mono promo of Blonde on Blonde is more meaningful than a limited edition Steve Aoki funko pop, but it's not like this isn't all silly on some level

well the mono promo sure sounds better ;)

the balance between an interest in history or rarity for rarity's sake

Right, this is basically the two main (unhealthy) currents that I see in record collector circles. Basically one group thinks they're art collectors and the other wants it to be like comic books or sealed action figures or something. Both are pretty silly and usually annoying

to be fair there are also legit archivists (thinking of Frank from VOD specifically)

but generally that statement is so otm it hurts, also I feel a bit seen lol

Mitch Blank is a perfect example of the legit archivist type, and what he's preserved came about from technically being a collector. I think this is true of any hobby, but you're going to have a wide variety of types ranging from people like Mitch Blank to those completely driven by self-interest.

wonder where Tefteller fits in on this spectrum ;)

Gold also goes into this a bit too:

RP: How do you respond to the criticism that a lyric sheet or something should be in a museum or available to the public rather than in some rich guy’s private collection?

JG: I agree, actually.

I bought the archives of Gloria Stavers, as I said, from 16, and Ralph Gleason, who was essentially the first popular music and jazz critic in America. Among their stuff, they had huge clipping files. Gloria Stavers literally clipped out of the paper the first article ever written about Bob Dylan, which was Robert Shelton’s review of the Greenbrier Boys and Dylan at Gerde’s. That’s how early she was into Dylan. And Gleason was not far behind.

Between the two of them, I had six notebooks of clippings in chronological order that went from that first article through '68. And that stuff is impossible to find. You might be able to find the content online, but the actual artifact, impossible. I’ve had these things for 25 years sitting on a shelf. Occasionally I’d pull them out when they were doing a new Bootleg Series and wanted to find artifacts from a particular era. I’d scan ‘em and give them to them, or things like that.

Two weeks ago, I finally decided, “These belong at the Dylan Center.” I had my assistant pack them up, they’re sitting in my garage, and I’m sending them out next week.

I do believe they belong in museums. So yeah, I agree. These things should be in a public space. Unfortunately, it’s very difficult for institutions to come up with the kind of cash these things cost. I will always sell something for less to an institution, and I will always loan something to an institution. I donated a painting of Bob’s to the Dylan Center. I’m very supportive of them. I’ve donated a lot of stuff to the Hall of Fame.

Unfortunately, it’s very difficult for institutions to come up with the kind of cash these things cost

yep, this is the issue, see that beef between UC San Diago (?) and the jazz collection guy

DIEGO FFS

Actually this is more relevant - they found a rare recording in Gleason's archive, and while they wanted to sell it, they also wanted to make it available to everyone:

RP: You mentioned Gleason. I know that plays into you discovering the Brandeis 1963 concert tape that got officially released. How did that happen?

JG: Ralph Gleason was a huge supporter of Dylan early on and became friendly with him. And he saved absolutely everything.

Years after Gleason died, I got introduced to the family at a time where they were trying to raise some money and clear the house out. The first time, it was kind of like, “Okay, you can go into the garage this time.” I went into the garage, and they had maybe fifteen file cabinets filled with stuff. I bought a lot of stuff, and they liked dealing with me. So the next time was, “You can go in the house.” Then the third time is, “You can go in the basement.”

In the basement, he had all these reel-to-reel tapes. Some of them were extensively annotated, and some of them not at all. Most interesting was maybe three feet of reel-to-reel Dylan tapes. Gleason had gotten stuff from Dylan and Grossman and Columbia Records. He was friends with John Hammond. People would send him tapes of bootlegs.

Some of the stuff, it was obvious it wasn’t that interesting. Tapes of bootlegs that had been released. And some of the stuff looked interesting. I said to Toby, Ralph’s son, “If you’re up for it, I’ll take the tapes that look interesting. I’ll book a studio at my expense, listen to them, and we can figure out where we go from there.”

A friend of mine had a studio and we just listened to tapes and tried to figure out what was what. So we’re listening to these things that are fairly uninteresting—“oh, this is a bootleg” or “oh, this tape’s been circulated.” There was this one that just said “Dylan Brandeis” in very light pencil on the spine of a white box. I put it on, and it was like perfect quality stereo. I was like, “What the hell is this?” I started Googling. There’s no Bob Dylan Brandeis tape anywhere. No story behind it. Just the two words, “Dylan Brandeis,” on the side.

The quality, as I said, was just incredible. So I sent it to Jeff Rosen and he said, “All right, here’s what I can pay you.” It wasn’t what [the Gleason family] was expecting, but as I explained, yes, you have an unreleased Bob Dylan tape, but it’s of no good to anybody else in terms of releasing it. Otherwise, it’s just somebody buying it to brag. They, like I, were interested in seeing it get released, so I sold it on their behalf to the Dylan office. Pretty quickly, they came up with a plan to release it.

Musicians and artists, not to mention manufacturers of every stripe, have been producing "limited edition" things for a very long time. Many times it doesn't work at all but it does sometimes work in my experience

― Cattedrale metropolitana di Santa Maria de Episcopio, Wednesday, April 8, 2026 1:06 PM (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

i mean to a degree every DIY indie or punk band ever is producing "limited edition" vinyl as they can't afford to press much more than a couple hundred

Its just that the demand is even more limited (usually).

"increasingly selective"

The DIY indie and punk version of "limited edition" is a nice trophy in taste - like, I bought this when the band and label barely had enough money to press this record, and now y'all calling yourself fans but I was there first!

hey don't talk shit about my Slay Tracks 7" that I bought when it came out ;)

another thing about these gimmick reissues is that they frequently have utterly worthless mastering and QC

But you get the soothing zipper-like sounds of non-fill. Oooo.....

a.k.a. "warmth"

Brrrr, it's cold in here. I better zip and unzip my hoodie over and over again just to feel that warmth.

misposted this to the Shady Scams thread:

i already shouted out the new episode of We Buy Records on the AI thread, but it deserves a mention here for their incredulous discussion of the $9,800 EX700 cartridge, "crafted from the finest spruce harvested in the South Tyrol region of Northern Italy—the very area said to be the source of the wood used for Stradivarius violins."

― Mighty Morphin Is The Subject of My Sentence (Doctor Casino), Friday, April 10, 2026 4:52 PM bookmarkflaglink

As you can imagine, the compatibility with string instruments is outstanding, but we hope you will play all genres of music with this cartridge.

the compatibility, definitely imagined!

I don't know if it would be enough to make a difference, but if anything, isn't wood a suboptimal material for this use?
Like, you don't actually want the cartridge itself to resonate, right?
Although with an object this small, I doubt it would matter either way, as there wouldn't be enough wood to resonate much.
But at least in principle, it seems to me like if it even did make a difference, it could be worse not better.

I have a wooden Grado cartridge, I like it! it's super sensitive though, sometimes I have to turn the weight up higher than usual

My dad’s turntable is some MFSL/Fender collaboration thing and the plinth is lacquered wood with a sunburst finish. It sounds really good, though.

Correct me if I'm wrong but usually, you can't manufacture collectability like this, right?

When I was ordering comic books for a living, whenever Marvel or DC would have a big special event they'd have 1 in 100 or 1 in 1000 variants (which was normal). Then another company started offering - at the same time I was ordering the initial run, so ~2 months ahead of release - graded versions of these variants. They'd arrive slabbed and a guaranteed 9.8 (not sure if it was actually on release day or if they arrived later). Not once did I see the guaranteed 9.8 version sell (via EBay or a collectible app) for as much as the initial price. The existence of guaranteed mint options immediately devalued the entire concept of grading and slabbing. (Similarly, the existence of those variants was starting to backfire when I escaped from that life - they almost never sold for as much money as the wholesale cost of buying the extra issues.)

Once something is slabbed, is it sealed forever?

You can crack open the slab with a butter knife

It's a funny idea that the creators spent so much time writing and drawing pages that their core audience prefer to be physically inaccessible.

the comics thing and the albums thing above makes me wonder why companies don't just sell good quality prints of things and forget about the actual content