Worst Power Ballad?

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My nomination - Kiss, "Forever". Absolutely godawful. Kiss were always smarmy and obnoxious anyway, but this one was responsible for making Kurt Cobain a star, or should have been

― dave q, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I like the video for Mr Big's "To Be With You" - those shred-crazy guitarist and bassist acting like they're enthusiastic and interested in a song with two chords in it. Billy Sheehan in particular might as well not have bothered, he's still too ugly to have even gotten laid with a pathetic ballad like that one

― dave q, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

"When Love And Hate Collide" by Def Leppard. Sixth form poetry combined with third form backing. Awful.

― Judd Nelson, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Any Poison ballad. Poison are the most terrible hair band, hands down. Admittedly, I was four or five when they were at their peak, but songs like "Mama Don't Dance" make me suicidal. Weak, obvious melodies for weak, obvious people.

― Clarke B., Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

If I apologize for that last comment, does that make me weak and obvious, too?

― Clarke B., Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

"When the Children Cry" by White Lion - Joan Baez meets Nazareth.

― J Blount, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

"Love of a Lifetime" by Firehouse.

― Alex in NYC, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Probably something by Lifehouse, Third Door Down or Creed, actually.

― Ned Raggett, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

No, I take it back, "It's Been Awhile" or that other Staind song, that live one.

― Ned Raggett, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I shall smite you for your Staind comments. Nothing can be worse than that awful "High Enough" song by Bad English.

― Dan Perry, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I admit, a strong contender, it is.

"WHEN I SEE...YOU...SMILE..."

I just liked seeing John Waite, having attempted the semi new-wave thing in the early eighties with the appropriate short haircut and semi-moody clothes, looking like a haggard hair farmer fuckup in the Bad English videos. Silly man.

― Ned Raggett, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Hmmm, how about that one that Meatloaf and Celine fought over, that Celine won? What's it called? "It's all coming back, all coming back to me now..." (that's a line not a pun on me not remembering the name). In the video she wears a big huge white dress, and lives in a castle with a ghost man who rides a motorcycle.

― laurie, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I just realized that I stuck two songs together. I was thinking of "When I See You Smile", but wrote "High Enough". Eek.

― Dan Perry, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

those shred-crazy guitarist and bassist acting like they're enthusiastic and interested in a song with two chords in it Whoever you really are, take back this prog-rock muso Dave Q and give back the other one. That Mr. Big song totally roolz.

― John Darnielle, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

"High Enough" is by Damn Yankees.

How about "Sister Christian" by Night Ranger (featuring Jack Blades....yeah, `cos that's his *REAL* name, I'm sure.....also of Damn Yankees)>

― Alex in NYC, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

How about "Sister Christian" by Night Ranger

Disqualified from this question for its exquisite use in Boogie Nights. Unlistenable any other way, though.

― Ned Raggett, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Excellent point, Ned.

― Alex in NYC, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I'd choose just one out of a virtual sea of vapid turds from the library of post-New-Jersey Bon Jovi. But most contemporary country rock stars make Bon Jovi's crooners sound like the Stooges in comparison.

― Brian MacDonald, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

"All I Wanna Do Is Make Love to You"- Heart.

― Joe, Saturday, 27 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

OK stupid question coming up.What is a power ballad? Is Roy Orbison considered a power ballad man? Could Pearl Jam's Alive be considered a power ballad? Or does it generally just refer to 80's hair bands and solo female artists of the 90's?

― kiwi, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

John D - I like the Mr Big song too, I just LOVE the thought that Gilbert and Sheehan probably find it torture!!! "OK Mr. Sony, we want our contract renewed, we'll do anything to...WHAT????"

― dave q, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Kiwi - think Jim Steinman, Desmond Child. Nazareth's "Love Hurts" (but not the Everly Bros. or Gram Parsons' "Love Hurts") is the template.

― J Blount, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Warrant - Heaven, which features these immortal lines - "How I love the way you move and the sparkle in your eyes/There's a colour deep inside them like the blue suburban skies". Wow, Jani, do you say that to all the girls?

― Damian, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

no "heaven" by warrant is great! here i nominate "everything i do" by dryan adams.

― di, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

There is perhaps more really horrible music in this genre than any other. I notice the Smallville TV theme is just getting a release, and that's appalling, but the new Trek show Enterprise has the most unspeakable theme ever, and it's a really grotesque power ballad, made from sticking together loads of horrible cliches from other power ballads, and sung in a style that seems to be a pastiche of the Real American Heroes/Real Men Of Genius TV ads. I don't know who it's by or if it's been released, but it may be the 'peak' of this awful style.

― Martin Skidmore, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Is "Winds of Change" a power ballad? The whistling might make it too soft. It's shit, anyway.

― Mike Ratford, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Cheap Trick's "The Flame", if only because it went a long way to nullifying any rep they might have still had at that point.

― Sean Carruthers, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

'Enterprise' theme tune by Russell 'The Voice' Watson.

― Andrew L, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Bryan Adams' "Everything I Do" would take the cake here if it had enough power for me to call it a power ballad. Cinderella's "Don't Know What You Got (Till It's Gone)" (those damn parenthesis!) definitely has the power AND it's a completely terrible song, so it wins.

― Vinnie, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I am amazed by the absence of Jennifer Rush...

― jamie, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

there is no such thing as a bad power ballad.

― di, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I give to you the ineffable slop that is "Ballad of Jayne" by the LA Guns and ask you to reconsider.

― Ned Raggett, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Key moment in "To Be With You" occurs in gtr solo when Gilbert accidentally sounds the open string & they, these hotshot wundermusicians PURPOSELY LEFT THE GLARING ERROR IN THE SONG guffaw guffaw hijinks hijinks madcap madcap!!

― AP, Sunday, 28 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Creed. Anything and everything. I know they're decades too new for the power ballad era; but their music always has a nasty power ballad feel to it. (And half the people who listen to them wouldn't be caught dead listening to, say, "Every Rose Has Its Thorn," which makes things even stupider.)

― Christine "Green Leafy Dragon" Indigo, Monday, 29 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Worst Pop Balled: The (dis)honors go to "Fly to the Angels" by Slaughter. The scary part being my 12 year old self would have thought differently.

― JC, Monday, 29 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

"It must've been love (but its over now" by some band that deserve execution.

― Lord Custos 2.0 beta, Monday, 29 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Just remember, kids, remove the 'S' from Slaughter, and you'll know what my reaction to the band was!

― Sean Carruthers, Monday, 29 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Asking "what is the WORST power ballad" is sort of like asking "what's worse - a hot poker in the eye or a razor across the mouth?" (I think I choose the razor.)

"Faithfully" - Journey.

― Dave225, Monday, 29 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

My nomination - Kiss, "Forever". Absolutely godawful. Kiss were always smarmy and obnoxious anyway, but this one was responsible for making Kurt Cobain a star, or should have been

On that note... "God Gave Rock and Roll to You."

― , Monday, 6 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Lord Custos - Roxette hardly deserve execution

― J Blount, Monday, 6 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Listen to that Roxette song every 30 minutes for 8 hours a day for 6 months and then get back to me on whether or not Roxette deserve execution or not.
But I will like to also add a blindingly obvious one no-one has mentioned yet: The Michael Bolton version of "If You Don't Know Me By Now."

― Lord Custos 2.0 beta, Monday, 6 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

The War Against Silence to thread!!

― mark s, Monday, 6 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Annihilator did a lot of incredibly, incredibly awful power ballads.

could Imagine be considered a power ballad? then that. Imagine is shite.

― Wyndham Earl, Sunday, 12 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

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