Best line in an Elvis Costello song

'I said 'I'm so happy I could die'/ she said 'drop dead' and left with another guy'

it's a force of habit,
if it moves then you fuck it, if it doesn't move you stab it

"blind ignorant nigger"

The rabid rambo dogs ransack the shampoo shop

He's got a mind like a sewer and a heart like a fridge / He stands to be insulted and he pays for the privilege...or something like that...

The detectives come to check if you belong to the parents who are ready to hear the worst about their daughter's disappearance

- It's like a tongue-twister

You were the spice of life
The gin in my vermouth
And though the sparks would fly
I thought our love was fireproof

"You're the marshmallow valentine that got stuck on her clothes"

"I know you've been loving somebody, I only know it isn't mine"

i know this world is killing you
my aim is true

Geir and Alfred already nailed my 1 and 2...

I'm not a telephone junkie
But when I hold you like I
Held that Bakelite
In my hand

Runner ups for me involve a contrast between the actions of the viewer and those of the investigators in "Detectives" and a disconnect between name and appearance in "Chelsea."

yes thats it

EVERY TIME I HOLD YOU, I JUST WANNA PUT YOU DOOOOOOWWWWN.

^ it's "phone you," I think...

From that one, I'll take the kicker:

Sometimes I phone you when I know youre not lonely,
But I always disconnect it in time.

someday you're gonna have to face
a deep dark truthful mirror
and it's gonna tell you things
that i still love you too much to say

(i like spike)

He's acting innocent and proud still you know what he's after
Like a matador with his pork sword, while we all die of laughter
In his turquoise pajamas and motorcycle hat
I hope you're happy now because you'll soon put pay to that
I knew then what I know now I never loved you anyhow
And I hope you're happy now

"Cut to the baby taking off her clothes/Close-up of the sign that says 'We Never Close'"

I'm not a telephone junkie

Alex took mine.
Also, "Till I speak double dutch to a real double duchess."

"You lack lust, you're so lackluster."

Charged with insults and flattery
Her body moves with malice
Do you have to be so cruel to be callous?

EC too often relies on what X-gau described as "puns for punters", but "Beyond Belief" is smart enough about the wordplay to avoid anything groan-worthy.

There's a word in Spanish
Italian and German
In sign language, morse code, semaphore and gibberish
Have you forgotten how to say it
In your pidgin English?

Maybe not his best line but I love singing along with this one.

Man - there's nuggets all over!

Until you realize my loss is your surprise unless you know otherwise
Then don't grieve - you see I had to be, the first to leave.

From the Juliet Letters

Too many to pick one. Okay:

"The salty lips of the socialite sisters
with their Continental fingers that have
never seen working blisters
Oh I know they've got their problems
I wish I was one of them."

yes I love that one. also "good manners and bad breath get you nowhere" from "new lace sleeves"