OPO: dopey Bernie Taupin lyrics

It's just another Sunday, in a tired old street
Well if you got the toco, oh, then we just lost the beat

Ma Coley plays the mamba, listen to the radio, don't you remember
We built this city, we built this city on rock an' roll!

And there's no one there to raise them if you did

Shouldn't it be "if you're dead"? I know the internet agrees with you, and so does Singstar, and William Shatner... but my version at least means something, "if you did" just makes no sense.

And Jeff is just rong!

sure sounds like "if you did" but EJ's phrasing is nothing if not unique. maybe he sing "if you dead"

"He may be dead"

"He maybe did what?"

I hate these:

I'm gonna tell the world, you're a dirty little girl
Someone grab that bitch by the ears
Rub her down scrub her back
And turn her inside out
`Cause I bet she hasn't had a bath in years

And these:

Island girl
What you wanting with the white man's world
Island girl
Black boy want you in his island world
He want to take you from the racket boss
He want to save you but the cause is lost
Island girl, island girl, island girl
Tell me what you wanting with the white man's world

And these:

When she gets up in the morning
It's enough to wake the dead
Oh she turning on the radio
And dancing on my head

It's no good living in the sun
Playing guitar all day
Boogalooing with my friends
In that erotic way

Come on Jamaica
In Jamaica all day
Dancing with your darling
Do Jamaica jerk-off that way

Come on Jamaica
Everybody say
We're all happy in Jamaica
Do Jamaica Jerk-off that way

Let the ladies and the gentlemen
Be as rude as they like
On the beaches, oh in the jungle
Where the people feel alright

So do it Jamaica
Got plenty for you and me
Honky tonking with my baby
In that deep blue sea

Levon wears his war wound like a crown
He calls his child jesus
`cause he likes the name
And he sends him to the finest school in town

Levon, levon likes his money
He makes a lot they say
Spend his days counting
In a garage by the motorway

He was born a pauper to a pawn on a christmas day
When the new york times said God is dead
And the wars begun
Alvin tostig has a son today

And he shall be levon
And he shall be a good man
And he shall be levon
In tradition with the family plan
And he shall be levon
And he shall be a good man
He shall be levon

Levon sells cartoon balloons in town
His family business thrives
Jesus blows up balloons all day
Sits on the porch swing watching them fly

And jesus, he wants to go to venus
Leaving levon far behind
Take a balloon and go sailing
While levon, levon slowly dies

"If I was a sculptor/But then again, no" wins the prize every fucking time for me, though the same song's "Anyway, the thing is, what I really mean" is in the same ballpark.

I think that verse about Mars is kinda funny, actually. Like, the TEMPERATURE's the main impediment to raising a family on Mars? Reminds me of Lou Reed advising against shooting sailors to death for fear of staining the carpet.

Variant thread

I'm 99.9% sure that Elton sings "if you did". In any case, it's surely a tribute to Elton's powers or the weird Bernie/Elton synergy that makes these songs work so well...even the ones w/some of the daftest lyrical passages I still find genuinely moving.

I didn't know until recently that "We Built This City" was a Taupin product, but it makes perfect sense...

Isn't it "Marconi says to mama, listen to the radio"?

All-time fave dopey BT lyric: "The roots were formed by twisted roots/Your roots were twisted then."

Had NO CLUE Taupin was behind "We Built This City." That might actually salvage the horrific thing...

While Mona Lisas and mad hatters,
sons of bankers, sons of lawyers,
turn around and say, "good morning" to the night.
For unless they see the sky, but they can't and that is why,
they know not if it's dark outside or light.

I'm 99.9% sure that Elton sings "if you did".

i'm 100% sure that that's what the printed lyrics on the album say.

Ma Coley plays the mamba, listen to the radio

Isn't it "Marconi says to mama, listen to the radio"?

the amazing thing is that both of you have managed to mangle these in a way that makes them even worse than the original, which isn't easy to do.

dopey BT lyric that sounds absolutely majestic coming out of EJ's mouth:

"but losing everything is like the sun going down on me"

dopey BT lyric that EJ can't save no matter how hard he tries:

"a couple of the sounds that i really like / are the sound of a switchblade and a motorbike"

"I was made in England like a bluuuuuuuuuuue Cortina"

BT doing 'hardman' lyrics for EJ to sing, might as well give 'em to DW.