Many musicians with ordinary, boring real names take new artist names just to sound cooler. But there's also a bunch of artists with real names so embarrassing you can totally understand why they assumed a pseudonym. Let's list those real names here:
Ice T - Tracy Morrow
Annie (from Norway) - Birger Djävlknull
Björk - Bóhätter Högmundkarlsdottír
Prince - Shawtesh Preck
Sting - Leonard Nimoy
Kate Bush - Catherine Vagina
― Tuomas, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 09:20 (eighteen years ago)
are you alright?
― jabba hands, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 09:22 (eighteen years ago)
Madonna Ciccone - Sharon Longstaff
― moley, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 09:23 (eighteen years ago)
Tom Petty - Tuomas Petit
― StanM, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 09:26 (eighteen years ago)
Bing Crosby- Bing Hitler
― moley, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 09:26 (eighteen years ago)
assbring
― W4LTER, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 09:28 (eighteen years ago)
David Bowie - Ben Dover-Anlick
― Tuomas, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 09:28 (eighteen years ago)
Michael Jackson - Terrence Snordley
― gr8080, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 09:54 (eighteen years ago)
Jay-Z - Jebbadiah Zachariah Housington III
― gr8080, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 09:56 (eighteen years ago)
Ban Fake Tuomas!
― Grandpont Genie, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 10:01 (eighteen years ago)
never ban any tuomas
― gr8080, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 10:15 (eighteen years ago)
Ja Rule - Cuthbert Calculus
Sid Vicious - Siddhartha Woolly
Morrissey - Harry Hamburglar
Elvis Costello - Elvis Presley
― Tuomas, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 11:10 (eighteen years ago)
Keith Sweat - Brian Sweat
― ledge, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 11:11 (eighteen years ago)
Tina Arena - Palladium Stadium
― ledge, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 11:12 (eighteen years ago)
The Kooks - The Anti Semites
― Dom Passantino, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 11:12 (eighteen years ago)
Thom Yorke - Bonzo Fripatelli
― Tuomas, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 15:33 (eighteen years ago)
Johnny Rotten - Danny Rotten
― Tuomas, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 15:34 (eighteen years ago)
David Bowie - Peter Tork
― Curt1s Stephens, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 15:39 (eighteen years ago)
Iggy Pop - Thelonius Pop
― Thomas, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 15:40 (eighteen years ago)
Newton Faulkner - Keith Bottoms
― blueski, Tuesday, 5 February 2008 15:44 (eighteen years ago)
Ice Cube - O'Shea JacksonSting - Boy O'SummerVanilla Ice - Andrew AryanLady Gaga - Ladee CacaPatti Smith - Patty HearseKanye West - Ouagadougou EastEngelbert Humperdinck - Slade McCool
― Tuomas, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 12:37 (fifteen years ago)
why the hell would anyone called SLADE MCCOOL change their name, huh?
― purblind snowcock splattered (a hoy hoy), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 12:39 (fifteen years ago)
this thread owns
― Princess TamTam, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 12:41 (fifteen years ago)
^^^just laughed solidly for like 2 mins
― best poster with ten-letter single-word username (acoleuthic), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 12:43 (fifteen years ago)
Johnny Marr - Johnyy Marzbar
― Mark G, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 12:43 (fifteen years ago)
cracking up here at "Catherine Vagina"
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 12:43 (fifteen years ago)
The Edge - David Howell EvansRobyn - Shadwell PutzMs Dynamite - Rikki Snavely
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 12:46 (fifteen years ago)
Morrissey - Woe Esme
― Mark G, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 12:48 (fifteen years ago)
Cerrone - Edgar Bon Jovi
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 12:49 (fifteen years ago)
Dee Dee Snider - Charles Esophagus
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 12:50 (fifteen years ago)
Cilla Black - Issy WysiwygRingo Starr - Donald CakePhil Anselmo - George Mummoon
― What are you doing here? (dog latin), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:02 (fifteen years ago)
Ciara - Fifi Greenblatt
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:04 (fifteen years ago)
Bono -Bongo
― sonofstan, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:04 (fifteen years ago)
Elton John - Nodahl Kernwright
― What are you doing here? (dog latin), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:07 (fifteen years ago)
Ol' Dirty Bastard - Archibald Leach
― Tuomas, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:07 (fifteen years ago)
Neil Young - Gary Geezer
― Tuomas, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:08 (fifteen years ago)
Pink - Enid Schaffelstaff-Boeringer
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:09 (fifteen years ago)
Bez - Erik Castlemaine Shitehouse Gorilla Bong-Bong Delaney
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:10 (fifteen years ago)
Gary Numan - Lester Hickens
― lookin qwyte (crüt), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:11 (fifteen years ago)
Akon - Coleen Nolan
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:13 (fifteen years ago)
Dr. Dre - Dr. Kildare
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:14 (fifteen years ago)
Frank Zappa - Irwin Merkin
― e.g. delete via naivete (ledge), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:16 (fifteen years ago)
Lou Reed - L0uis J4gger
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:18 (fifteen years ago)
Bob Dylan - Nob Dylan
― lookin qwyte (crüt), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:18 (fifteen years ago)
Slash - Piss
Axl Rose - William B. Egomaniac
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:19 (fifteen years ago)
No,
Axl Rose - Axel Ros
― Tuomas, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:21 (fifteen years ago)
Momus - Rank Sticklin
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:21 (fifteen years ago)
Nivea - Jergins Hoff
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:22 (fifteen years ago)
Fish from Marillion is actually originally named Derek William Dick, so no wonder he changed his name....
Varg Vikernes was also not so content with his name, Kristian Vikernes. Yep, Kristian means Christian....
― You're Twistin' My Melody Man! (Geir Hongro), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:26 (fifteen years ago)
Ralf Huetter - Handjob McFarlan
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:26 (fifteen years ago)
Otherwise...
Sophie Ellis-Bextor: Jane SmithJoe Strummer: Landon Von Snickelgruben Mountbatten
― You're Twistin' My Melody Man! (Geir Hongro), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:28 (fifteen years ago)
DMC - Daryl Hannah
― irish xmas caek, get that marzipan inta ya (a hoy hoy), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:34 (fifteen years ago)
Bruce Springsteen - Jean-Sébastien de la Malle IV
― iatee, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:38 (fifteen years ago)
Jah Wobble - Dis Vicious
― Mark G, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:40 (fifteen years ago)
Jimi Tenor: Jukka KoskenkorvaTarja Turunen: Saunaläinen Perkele
― You're Twistin' My Melody Man! (Geir Hongro), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:43 (fifteen years ago)
Michael Bublé - Mikey Flakey-Skinrash Wristcramp Cokesucker VII
― Les centimètres énigmatiques (snoball), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:47 (fifteen years ago)
stupid - Ladee Caca
I actually thought she failed pretty hard when I found out her real name was Stefani. If your first or last name is Stefani, you start out in Ska and then progress to Dance Pop and stupid. She's doing it wrong.
― ILM Flipping - I Kelsey Grammered Your Thread (MintIce), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 13:51 (fifteen years ago)
Madonna - Beatrice Rotunda
― What are you doing here? (dog latin), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 14:32 (fifteen years ago)
lady gaga
― lookin qwyte (crüt), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 14:33 (fifteen years ago)
ok never mind I thought it was autocorrecting
― lookin qwyte (crüt), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 14:34 (fifteen years ago)
Lady Gaga: Farrokh Bulsara
― You're Twistin' My Melody Man! (Geir Hongro), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 16:34 (fifteen years ago)
Terrence Trent D'Arby - Hyundai Sonata
― shanti ram emmanuel (corey), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 16:40 (fifteen years ago)
Stuart Murdoch - Sir Dr Johnny Destructor
― Antoine Bugleboy (Merdeyeux), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 16:41 (fifteen years ago)
Mr. Fingers - Lawrence Fingers
― shanti ram emmanuel (corey), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 16:41 (fifteen years ago)
Exene Cervenka - Fallopia Jones
― shanti ram emmanuel (corey), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 16:45 (fifteen years ago)
Tim Allen - Spottiswoode Aitken
― shanti ram emmanuel (corey), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 16:47 (fifteen years ago)
Debbie Gibson - Rathgar the Invicible
― progressive cuts (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 17:14 (fifteen years ago)
it was the misspelling that so galled her, you see
Ron Sexsmith - Don Sexsmith
― lonely is as lonely does, lonely is an eeyore (unregistered), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 19:12 (fifteen years ago)
Aretha Franklin - Aretha Benjamins
― tremendoid, Wednesday, 8 December 2010 20:23 (fifteen years ago)
lol
― EIEIoOoOO (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Wednesday, 8 December 2010 20:38 (fifteen years ago)
Elizabeth Cotton - Wamsutta Percale
― Hideous Lump, Thursday, 9 December 2010 03:01 (fifteen years ago)
Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan - Bernard Flaps
― lonely is as lonely does, lonely is an eeyore (unregistered), Thursday, 9 December 2010 04:53 (fifteen years ago)
Ronnie Van Sant - Ralph FeldmanGary Rossington - Blaine Houseman IIIAllen Collins - Malik UsmaniLeon Wilkeson - Sally ChanningArtimus Pyle - Artimus PyleBilly Powell - Sir William Crooks
― earlnash, Thursday, 9 December 2010 05:38 (fifteen years ago)
Freddie Mercury - Valentin Uranus
― Tuomas, Thursday, 9 December 2010 07:10 (fifteen years ago)
Leigh Bowery - Sunshine Cuddly
― RR, Thursday, 9 December 2010 07:24 (fifteen years ago)
Bruce Cockburn - Bruce Cockburn
― unintentional boob pic (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 9 December 2010 07:28 (fifteen years ago)
Brian Eno - One BrainProfessor Griff - Izzy GriffowitzLydia Lunch - Chlamydia LunchChuck D - Leroy WashingtonBarry Gibb - Andy GibbTed Nugent - Ted bin LadenKeith Richard(s) - Keith Richard(s)Cher Bono-Allman-Simmons-Samboro - Cher Slut
― Canadian Club & Dr. Pepper (Myonga Vön Bontee), Thursday, 9 December 2010 08:37 (fifteen years ago)
Iggy Pop - Iggy Disco
― Mark G, Thursday, 9 December 2010 09:27 (fifteen years ago)
Chas & Dave - Chas & David
― unintentional boob pic (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 9 December 2010 10:10 (fifteen years ago)
Ben Fong-Torres - Ban Fake Tuomas
― Hideous Lump, Friday, 10 December 2010 03:26 (fifteen years ago)
Ian Curtis - Cedric WeinerCaptain Sensible - Travis SensibleStiv Bators - Jack Manlove Jr.Elvis Costello - Mohammed Akbar AlhusseiniLou Barlow - Louis Wayne RubiosHaddaway - Munenobu Shinozu
― Lazarus Niles-Burnham (res), Friday, 10 December 2010 05:34 (fifteen years ago)
Genesis P-Orridge - Bernice Frankel
― lookin qwyte (crüt), Friday, 10 December 2010 17:34 (fifteen years ago)
Bradford Cox - Chad Cocks
― I will always think of you, while (quite) fondly, myself (Evan), Friday, 10 December 2010 21:44 (fifteen years ago)
Chris DeBurgh -Christy Burke
― sonofstan, Saturday, 11 December 2010 00:01 (fifteen years ago)
http://www.clickhole.com/article/10-real-names-rappers-theyd-rather-you-didnt-know-545
Did these folks read my thread?
― Tuomas, Friday, 18 July 2014 13:20 (eleven years ago)
Though admittedly I got the idea from an old Volume compilation booklet.
― Tuomas, Friday, 18 July 2014 13:22 (eleven years ago)
Cher - Cherilyn Sarkesian
Kylie Minogue - Kylexandra Rastapopoulos
Cee-Lo - Ceeman Lova
Robyn - Ronja Rövardotter
Rod Stewart - Shaft Stewart
KRS-One - Robert van Winkle
― Tuomas, Thursday, 24 March 2016 13:12 (nine years ago)
― shanti ram emmanuel (corey), 8. joulukuuta 2010 18:41 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
For some reason this is totally breaking me up.
― Tuomas, Thursday, 17 November 2016 14:26 (nine years ago)