Unblack Metal - Are you knowing what it is, are you thinking it is stupid.

http://c.myspace.com/Groups/00016/76/36/16346367_m.jpg

HORDE
Hellig Usvart (1994)

1. A Church Bell Tolls Amidst The Frozen Nordic Winds
2. Blasphemous Abomination Of The Satanic Pentegram
3. Behold The Rising Of The Scarlet Moon
4. Thine Hour Hast Come
5. Release And Clothe The Virgin Sacrifice
6. Drink From The Chalice Of Blood
7. Silence The Blasphemous Chanting
8. Invert The Inverted Cross
9. An Abandoned Grave Bathes Softly In The Falling Moonlight
10. Crush The Bloodied Horns Of The Goat
11. Weak Feeble Dying Antichrist
12. The Day Of Total Armageddon Holocaust

PLEASE! SILENCE THE BLAPHEMOUS CHANTING

http://www.raptureradio.net/sites/images/NF%20-%20Cindy%20with%20Pilgrim%20and%20Jayson%20Sherlock.JPG

And the lord spoketh to the huddling mass, "Death to false metal! 666!"

Oh god, the picture!

LOL

I guess he's pretty otm about Unblackness

Who?

JAYSON SHERLOCK

Elementary, my dear Varg.

Skit, imagining Varg's face!

http://image.com.com/mp3/images/genie_images/story/2006/v/varg_vikernes_story.jpg

O.o

Sherlock's hair+scarf+turtleneck. wtf

Hello, Vice article

Janne Karlsson is frantically trying to get a new password right now, but nothing's coming into his email account. Bear with him.

I am alone, thinking this kind of thing is so rough? X(

I was thinking of copying a line from the Horde's titles, but each one is making me laugh ensuring too difficult of choice.

Although: 5. Release And Clothe The Virgin Sacrifice

LOL

Wikipedia:

"Horde was so influential both musically and lyrically that several groups have almost copied the band's style"

Almost!?

I think you may be alone, Pål, in your experience of the roughness. From where I stand, it's kinda cute.

Aquarius folk have been talking about this or that "white metal" band for years. Never heard any of it.

It is perhaps seeming more cute from a silent distance.

they have great clothes!

http://www.rockdetector.com/assets/resized/img/artists/47344-0-220-0-300.jpg

christian metal, it is like ice to water. no. fire to water. there can be only but steam that smells of shit and weaklingnes

This is being a little poetic to my taste, but I am agreeing that it is bad, though I find also humor in it.

5. Release And Clothe The Virgin Sacrifice

roffle

See!

9. An Abandoned Grave Bathes Softly In The Falling Moonlight

Also lols, and nice follow up to #5

this grave will not be abandoned for long

I'm partial to the rather clumsily expressed sentiment of "Invert the Inverted Cross"

what is 'cross stream' on the middle one's shirt...i tell you what it is, it is my urine streaming down on their cross

HaHaHa

I am so happy.

Ned Raggett, please be telling the other members in your Unblack Metal troupe!

They ran away. :-(

For a long time I have lurked, but this is too much for me to hold in silence. I have many things to announce about this SHIT, but such is my ANGER I will first try to calm.

http://www.workandtravel.no/reisebrev/Images/MardiGras/meditate.JPG

Please do not disappoint us, Janne. We require the full force of your announcements.

Anger is good, but cold rage is best. So: I am now determinate and central in my cold rage to talk about this FUCKING SHIT.

you should calm down bro

http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u17/lein_83/ADVISORY.jpg

xpost do they have chill pills in your country?

11. Weak Feeble Dying Antichrist

First: this PHOTO. I wish to know three things:

1. Who is fucking SEA CAPTAIN on far right? Is he perhaps out to catch me some FUCKING lutefisk?

2. Who is fucking smiling WOMAN in middle? She is some kind of youth outreach coordinator? She is going to teach us fucking how to tie-dye? I will tie her up and she will die.

3. My friend on the far left. You, my friend, you take and eat all the cake up. I will gather my thoughts. How to describe you? YOU, are a fucking PONY. I ride you all over fucking Oslo and feed you from a bag! This is grim? This is how a Christian is grim? You will defeat the forces of darkness making making us laugh ourselves into DEATH??!!? Hihi!!

I'd be more concerned about that scarf if I was you, it's obviously hiding secrets from the vast and terrible depths of space.

I've known one Horde fan. He was really, really into that and the first Coal Chamber album, and considered himself one wicked-evil grimbob. I'm pretty sure he thought they were satanic, however.
Later on he stole my copies of "World Downfall" and "Hammerheart", the fuck, and now his knees are useless. Who wants lemon squares and tang?

that scarf hides a fear of my blade, is what it hides.

(x-post) His knees are useless because he spends his life on them, I am thinking.

Hails Vas! Fenriz tells me that he wrote that song about Canadian black metal in your honour. But what would he remember, seeing as he is always so pissed on Borg Bokkøl when he writes his lyrics on a beermat.

Damn you're hostile, Karlsson.

Pal Utendli needs to show up on more threads.

^^

Øystein, hello to my neighbour! XD

Janne, I am being a fan of yours from the "Making Love To Black Metal" thread, in fact this is what is bringing me to ILXOR.com!

YOU, are a fucking PONY.

holy crap so awesome

(Bill Magill, I am thanking you for your kind phrase)

Janne-

I følge Øystein Aarseth var det meste innen metal på begynnelsen av 90-tallet, utenom noen få norske og svenske band, falsk life metal.

lol

(Eisenfaust) has someone listened to the new Hellfucked album?
(ATA) Anybody heard the new Akercocke?
(MTIRD) analcunt
(infernal vulture) ugliness shall be endeth
(UglinessAndSecretions) you know what anus cunt is?
(23DeadRosicrucians) I got the new akercocke
(--Etoile noirE--) ackercoke argh is a big shit
(UglinessAndSecretions) hey, whats you problem man?
(i*am*the*black*wizards) we are children of odin and thor
(Odd-Einar) u deny humans conquered the world?
(infernal vulture) rats are sucessful creatures, yet eagles are near extinction
(sven hoek) hahaahah
(melrick) some aliens are creaters of life in the galaxy
(sven hoek) and they are extradimensional entities
(melrick) some aliens are daemons
(sven hoek) aliens are gods
(Odd-Einar) scientology is insane, cause they say aliens landed on Hawaii 7 million years ago, but the problem is that Hawaii didnt exist at that time
(sven hoek) scientology is a money making scheme
(infernal vulture) all is just a fucking jewish conspiracy
(23DeadRosicrucians) L Ron Hubbard belonged to a sex magick cult in Florida in the 30s before he started scientology
(Alex Schwarz) Satan is like Darth Vader or something
(Odd-Einar) nobody listens to your feeble illogic views on nature/ humanity
(sorrowtears) aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
(23DeadRosicrucians) the world as a whole has never been ready to accept enlightenment... those who cant understand it have always tried to destroy those who do...
(UglinessAndSecretions) black metal man does not want to believe...he wants to disbelieve and destroy!
(Odd-Einar) humans are better than animals thats an universal truth
(UglinessAndSecretions) how is that a universal truth..?
(noisebastard) animals dont eat mcdonalds and listen to Eminem
(Odd-Einar) nobody will manage to kill Varg, he's so powerful and true, a real necrokult frostbitten bastard, krieg as hell
(banananutrament.blogspot.com) can anyone recommend any Christian friendly Black Metal bands?
(VikingligrVeldi) are you kidding?
(SuSa) lol
(SuSa) christian black metal = ass shit
(NocturnoC) lol
(Alex Schwarz) there is no such thing, banana nutrament
(BuriedTemporarily) yeah there is
(Lord of Tears) Christ's Womb is good
(BuriedTemporarily) white metal
(NocturnoC) lol
(VikingligrVeldi) how about "Cut Your Flesh and Worship Satan"?
(Alex Schwarz) it's not black metal then
(Pure_Hatred) Black metal is Antichristian, it is like asking for satanic gospel
(NocturnoC) then it isnt black metal
(Alex Schwarz) well, black metal is the satanic gospel
(Pure_Hatred) Try Satanic Slaughter, banananutrament, they are pretty christian
(NocturnoC) try antichrist 666, good christian black metal
(Pure_Hatred) or Impaled Nazarene
(ShieldMaiden) no he shall try Archgoat
(Alex Schwarz) Setherial is a good christian band
(Pure_Hatred) Diabolis Arising
(CrepuscolarWhisper) don't forget Havohej, songs about God's love, flowers, coloured birds and etc...

The Horde album was a prank by Jayson Sherlock of Mortification, with riffs lifted left and right from Mayhem, Immortal and Darkthrone albums - basically one half taking the piss and proving how easy it is to clone the True Norwegian Black Metal sound, and one half real admiration of what those bands were doing musically.

Is the Xianity real or not?

Cobalt were accused of being white metal (in the Christian sense) because the guy used to be in an xtian band I think but supposedly he renounced Christianity just before he started Cobalt.

The phrase "white metal" was supposedly coined to market Trouble, who weren't ever a Christian band in the first place (no more than Black Sabbath, anyway). Nobody seems to have a problem with Trouble.

"Contenderizer," no one is knowing who in fuck they are being.

Nowadays white metal has other connotations so you never know if its a christian band or neo nazi shit.
Trouble are awesome, that's why.

Trouble are awesome, that's why.

Exactly. Being awesome is the solution to all this.

Am listening to Manic Frustration as we (do not) speak.

this white metal, it is more like shite metal do you hear

I like the one about the PONY better.

this one?

http://youtube.com/watch?v=BWh8XKvsYqc

yeah yeaooow yeah, that one

Janne-

I følge Øystein Aarseth var det meste innen metal på begynnelsen av 90-tallet, utenom noen få norske og svenske band, falsk life metal.

lol

-- Pål Útlendi

You are on point, my friend, with this telling observation. If Øystein were alive today, he would be rolling in his grave.

It's hard to evaluate how telling that observation is. But I think I understand the "false life metal" and "lol" parts.

Janne --

If he were not being too lazy to execute a roll.

Croatian Documental:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lBdS9csE268

And it is the worst thing I am seeing til this day:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exkOLBqvKRc

am i to understand that hellhammer was a session drummer for fucking ANTESTOR

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unblack_metal

Etymologically, the term "unblack metal" derived from "holy unblack metal", which was a wordplay invented by Sherlock from the Norwegian band Darkthrone's "unholy black metal" term.[2]

Good work, Sherlock, we are all loving this style. >:O

― Pål Útlendi, Tuesday, February 26, 2008 3:12 AM (1 year ago) Bookmark

^^^ howling post

seriously is it a widespread internet meme or did an ex mayhem seriously play on some antestor shit, im laughing over it and the laughing feels good

Nobody in Mayhem ever had a problem with religion, says Heavenhammer.

• "De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas"

• Blasphemer

• erstwhile bassist torched 7 churches

If you look at their logo upside down it has not one but TWO crosses that aren't inverted anymore. (Yeah I know, I was just quoting him there, btw)

YOU, are a fucking PONY. I ride you all over fucking Oslo and feed you from a bag!

amazing post