Which FreeCreditReport.com commercial song most makes you want to stab that smug motherfuck's eyes out with a rusty fork?

i'm torn....i hate the way the asshole bass player says "yee-haw" in the pirate one sooo bad....but then in the car one, the singer asshole does this little fucking smirk at the end of "credit report.com bab-bee" right at the last moment of the commerical that i can't fucking stand either.

I never get that far.
The TV gets turned fucking off two seconds into these human tumors

these are a huge scam btw

if you didnt need enough reasons to hate this fucker

didnt have enough reasons i mean

When you order your free report here, you will begin your free trial membership in Triple AdvantageSM Credit Monitoring. If you don’t cancel your membership within the 30-day trial period, you will be billed $12.95 for each month that you continue your membership. If you are not satisfied, you can cancel at any time to discontinue the membership and stop the monthly billing; however, you will not be eligible for a pro-rated refund of your current month’s paid membership fee.

Sadly, this is true - they got me.

So the correct answer is "firebomb the corporate office.'

Gotta be the car dude for that smirk. The worst thing about these ads is that the old FreeCreditReport.com jingle was great.

the apartment one where he blames it all on his new wife's bad credit is worst!

peeps need dvrs stat

no commercial has made me change channel this fast since the Taco Bell Nachos Bell Grande one a while back.

if i knew there was no way anyone would ever find out it was me, i would kill all of these motherfuckers and not lose a second of sleep over it my entire life, i swear.

if any of you want to appear on a court transcript, post now and get caught up in the fun when that post is revealed as the key character evidence in the trial where i get sent down for a murder i didn't commit.

"didn't" commit

i kind of like these commercials actually, despite myself. but yeah this is a bullshit service, you can get a free credit report with no strings attached from annualcreditreport . com

i'm not convinced. where's your jingle?

the apartment one where he blames it all on his new wife's bad credit is worst!

-- gff, Friday, May 23, 2008 5:20 PM (10 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

crap! i totally spaced that one...they don't show it nearly as much as the other two.

irritating AND sexist, just awesome.

Here is the young man is question.

http://www.ericviolette.com/videos.php

Scroll way down in the comments for Pammie's ILX-worthy exegesis:

http://christyhulsey.wordpress.com/2008/01/14/free-credit-report-dot-com-pirate-commercial/

WTF he is french? oh, canadian

i like both of these but the car one is not as good as the pirate one

I was thinking about doing this poll last week and totally spaced it. I HATE THEM SO MUCH.

Gotta go with the car one (don't know the apartment commercial, I only see tv in the break room at work). Worse song, + the face. That song is like every open mic night at this bar down the street from here but with less Sublime and 311 covers.

Someone please make a gif of that smirk at the end.

OH NOES THAT VIDEO OF HIS BAND!!!

ts: freecreditjingle vs vampire weekend

I've only heard the radio spots so I'm missing the visuals, but come on, that line about his legs stickin' to the vinyl while his posse's gettin' laughed at is pretty good. But AKM OTM about the misleading nature of 'Free Credit Report'.

Does anyone remember the Jiffy Lube radio spots ca. '98-'99 with the guy singing lyrics over a bunch of well-known classical pieces? I've googled to no avail. . .

definitely the car one

I like them both. What do I do now?

you can GO DIE!!!!! it's funny, no matter how seemingly cosmically awful a commercial is there's always a couple of fans.

voted for the car one.

lol momus made a commercial.

none of these are as annoying than their generic girl singing 'freeee credit report DOT! COM!'

but that was classic jingling!

ftr none of these are nearly as bad as the optimum commercials

best commercial is the jg wentworth takeoff on network

http://youtube.com/watch?v=HX0fIi3H-es

best

if you love the commercial, buy the domain!

http://cgi.ebay.com/4-Domain-Names-ITS-MY-MONEY-AND-I-NEED-IT-NOW-COM_W0QQitemZ190211798959QQihZ009QQcategoryZ46689QQcmdZViewItem

http://pics.ebaystatic.com/aw/pics/stores/MrkdwnMgr/imgFreeShipping.gif

lololo

For me, any instance of the FreeCreditReport generohipsterish quasi-Jon Heder-looking douche mascot inspires vomitous convulsions, but the horror of that shit-eating smirk and head-nod in the closing seconds of the "car" commercial makes me want to perform unspeakable acts.

The only other recent example of song-in-commercial that achieves such storied annoyance levels, for me at least, is that Dunkin' Donuts "My mouth can't form these words" bit. Kill Kill Kill!!!

all of the dunkin' donuts ads are pretty blowticious.

There is a third one in his apartment, by the way.

I'd just like to say that despite that thread title having the word "stab" in it, I did NOT write this one (although I hoarily agree with the sentiment).

Something about the guy's fixed, unblinking gaze gives me the fuckin' creeps as well.

how would bad credit stop you getting a job?

i've had credit checks from landlords and when i bought a car, but not jobs as far as i know.

is this some weird us thing?

Scroll way down in the comments for Pammie's ILX-worthy exegesis:

http://christyhulsey.wordpress.com/2008/01/14/free-credit-report-dot-com-pirate-commercial/

-- dad a, Friday, May 23, 2008 5:45 PM (3 days ago) Bookmark Link

God would have warned me about devil tricks.

The only other recent example of song-in-commercial that achieves such storied annoyance levels, for me at least, is that Dunkin' Donuts "My mouth can't form these words" bit. Kill Kill Kill!!!

-- Pillbox, Monday, 26 May 2008 09:12 (7 hours ago) Link

[They Might be Giants] contributed fourteen original songs for the 2006 Dunkin' Donuts ad campaign, "America Runs On Dunkin'", including "Things I Like To Do", "Pleather" and "Fritalian".

Who the fuck are all these people who think these commercials are hilarious? Reading Youtube comments and the one from that one website above, it's like this is the most hilarious commercial ever made. Do I live next to these people??

the car one is so much worse especially for the jokey "rapper" mannerisms

Oh my gosh I loved their original jingle so much. I will slay the makes of these new, and inaccurate, abominations.

(That is about how the apartment one is wrong.)

Do I live next to these people??

-- burt_stanton, Monday, May 26, 2008 12:08 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

they're everywhere

They're even worse than the guys who watch Viva Tequila on break at my job every night. Even those fux think these commercials suck.

Someone please make a gif of that smirk at the end.

-- RabiesAngentleman, Friday, May 23, 2008 12:49 PM (3 days ago) Bookmark Link

pretty please?

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

the car one is so much worse especially for the jokey "rapper" mannerisms

Truly. His usage of "posse," "fly" and "rollin' phat" make me shudder with contempt.

After watching some of the other vids on the guy's page, am I wrong in postulating that that's not his voice?

it's not. he's french canadian. he's also really bad at lip-synching.

Car one has been pulled due to terms of use violation, so I stuck another link up in the text, hope that's OK matt (I can't edit poll text or I'd have just updated the link there)

They're both very annoying in their obnoxious bullshit chirpiness, but the car one is worse for sure.

Some of the youtube comments must be from street-teamers, surely.

Some, from complete fucktards, of course.

I watched the g.f. with bad credit one. It is far worse than the other 2.

these are all brilliant
so much better than the old "I'm thinking of a number..." garbage
EFF ARR EEE EEE THAT SPELLS FREE

I have to say I'd rather watch any of these three ads than the "viva viagra" spot and the whole lot remain a damn sight better than those fucking cadillac ads, especially the one for the Escalade that uses Justice

That reminds me

a related question would be: who most deserves to be mauled by bears, these freecreditreport.com guys, or the inane duo who did those Applebee's commercials riffing on the "Gilligan's Island" theme?

ten/fifteen years from now people who're 12 now are gonna be talking about the classic commercials of their youth like those awesome free credit ones with the pirate dude and why don't they make cool commercials like that any more

especially the one for the Escalade that uses Justice

Is that the one where he says it's "dripping in chrome" and that if it had a bathroom he'd live in it? God I hate that.

i like the one the one in his apartment. it sounds like fountains of wayne. it's a great tune, IMHO. the other ones, not so great, but the car one is easily the worst.

Reminds of the Barenaked Ladies and the type of people who love the Barenaked Ladies.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

yay car one.

especially the one for the Escalade that uses Justice

dis must be run during rich guy shows on CNBC, i've never seen it.

J0hn may possibly be otm, but they're still unbearable to me.

"yay car one" also otm

best commercials for bullshit product = Enzyte

wait, are those the "smilin' bob" ones or the awesome ones with the creepy, failed actors in their 40s pretending to be regular guys with creepy, failed actresses in their 20s pretending to be their girlfriends? and using the word "bigger" like it was the new comma?

OMG there's a new one which may be the worst yet.

F to the R to the E to the E...

a new one??? wha? what is the set up?

I like knowing that the real reason people live with their parents, own economy cars, ride bikes and work in restaurants is because their credit score sucks.

a new one??? wha? what is the set up?

He (and, apparently, everyone else in his town) is riding a bicycle because he score is so low he had to trade in his car for a bike because of gas prices (?!). Also, the old lady from the seafood restaurant is a crossing guard.

he=his

would stab

i kinda like these

man, missed this thread when I was away, I woulda spewed so much hate about these ads. fuckin @@ron l@cr@te lookin' french canadian guy.

The dream-girl one irks me because he calls her his dream girl but then suggests that he would have ditched her if he'd only known how crappy her credit was. It's probably the catchiest song, but still. Plus, you know, I don't care how crappy her credit is, you can still rent for a while, instead of living with her parents, you big freeloader.

these are no IO digital cable song

oh yay there's more coming

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26061279/

yay...ay...ayyy...

btw, worst written article i've read in a long time. also, i like that the writer has an anime icon instead of a picture, that screams good journalism.

in fact "worst written" is probably being charitable.

You think that's somethin, track down her article giving us all the skinny on this "emo" thing that's all the rage with the youth.

how would bad credit stop you getting a job?

The financial services company I work for checks credit. People with terrible credit (or in bankruptcy) are bad risks for jobs where employees are handling a customer's financial information.

http://www.jayski.com/schemes/2008/scup/talladega1/38freecredit-side-talla.jpg

Okay, I take back what I said about the bicycle one and transfer the title of worst ever to the one where dude and his bandmates are working a champagne party at the mansion.

Oh quit lying. You'd totally bump to this at the club. I'ma spin it tonight.

I wouldn't be surprised if Asshead Smirkface and his low-credit-having hijinks were synergized into a sitcom, ala the Geico Caveman (shudder).

as long as they they continue poorly dubbing him in english.

the new one with the "punk" song at the Renaissance Faire where he makes a "I'm really into my own song, a lot" face at the end

oh god i hadn't seen that. also there's one break where the bass player does a "cool guy" pointing gesture.

E-surance is making me very very angry.

this is like, the single worst rock group i've ever heard in my entire life

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sm_sEc2vDok

WE'RE EVOLOVE.

"alternative *shrugs*"

One horn section away from being Save Farris