Aaargh! Okay...thats it. Rap is now officially NO LONGER COOL!

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I can vaguely enjoy some Japaneese rap because its exotic.
I can almost-but-not-quite forgive Vanilla Ice because he had good taste in what to steal.
I can even let Chevy Chases rap record slide, because it is so far out of print that I know I'll never ever have it inflicted upon me ever again.
But this is asking waaaaaay too much of my patience and understanding.
Freinds don't let friends compose rap songs for their Silicon Valley-based software firms "corporate song"

Lord Custos 2.0 beta, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Okay, on second thought...the chorus (!) kinda scans well. But I dread actually HEARING this being played. The crews (?) "lead MC" looks like a 60 year old management drone and he probably has less Riddim than Chevy Chase.

Lord Custos 2.0 beta, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

No....masochistic urge...making me look for a download section at their website...must resist...

Lord Custos 2.0 beta, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

a Helen Reddy rhyme! they're doin some next shit over at Asera...

Tracer Hand, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

next shit ?

Lord Custos 2.0 beta, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

biz markie was on that stone list = this is not news

mark s, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

helen Reddy rhymes are very "next" I'm told

Tracer Hand, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

A friend went to a cryptography conference where the head of some big cryptography company rapped 'Cryptographer's Delight' to the tune of 'Rapper's Delight' - with the actual Sugarhill Gang.

DV, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

HOLY SHIT. That would be the best cryptography conference EVER.

Dan Perry, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

The next year they had Starship.

DV, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

.. just curious .. what year would those conferences have been? Just trying to gauge the degree of patheticness.

Dave225, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

1975.

Sterling Clover, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I can almost-but-not-quite forgive Vanilla Ice because he had good taste in what to steal.

i'm guessing that's because of the "under pressure" sample at work in "ice ice baby".

here's some more rap you can "almost-but-not-quite" forgive (due to sampling of queen and/or bowie)!!:

"Flash Gordon":
DJ Shadow's "Basic Mega-Mix"
Public Enemy's "Terminator X to the Edge of Panic"

"We Will Rock U":
DJ Shadow's "Basic Mega-Mix"
2 Live Crew's "Word II"
7A3's "7A3 Will Rock You"
Grandmaster Flash & the Furious Five's "We Will Rock You"
Ice Cube's "When Will They Shoot?"
Kool Moe Dee's "Rock You"

"Another One Bites the Dust":
B-Legit's "Gotta Buy Your Dope from Us"
Grandmaster Flash & the Furious Five's "Adventures on the Wheels of Steel"
Hammer's "Let's Get it Started"
Kurtis Blow's "Christmas Rap"
MC Shan's "Down by Law"
Wyclef Jean's "Another Bites the Dust"

"Changes":
Das EFX's "Changes"

"Sail Away Sweet Sister"
Das EFX's "Changes"

"Memory of a Free Festival"
Dario G's "Sunmachine"

"Fame"
EPMD's "It Wasn't Me, It was the Fame"
House of Pain's "Shamrocks and Shenanigans"
Public Enemy's "Night of the Living Baseheads"
Sir Mix-A-Lot's "My Posse's on Broadway"

"Let's Dance"
Lace Da Boom's "And One"
Puff Daddy's "Been around the World" god bless this wonderful wonderful thing.

marek, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Have you guys not heard of the contemporary dance atrocity that is "Infogrammes Rocks My World"? Or the grating marketing frat fuck that is Electronic Arts take on "Louie Louie" called "EA EA"?

As far as corporate anthems go, the Asera rap would at least be fun to listen to, in a bystander-near-a-chemical-fire sorta way.

Brian MacDonald, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

man that was some amazing cut n paste from the sample faq, post of the year!!!

ethan, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Thanks marek, I'll look into those.

Lord Custos 2.0 beta, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

As far as corporate anthems go, the Asera rap would at least be fun to listen to...
I know I'm going to regret it, but the morbid curiousity is killing me. If anyone can secure an mp3 (of at least 96 bitrate) please email me a copy. Thanks in advance.
Was the "Ea Ea" song any good?

Lord Custos 2.0 beta, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

The EA song should have been to the tune of Nelly's "EI".

Dan Perry, Thursday, 9 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Rap was EVER cool??! Let's get this straight. Rap SUCKS, no matter what. It's just some guy saying "Fuck fuck fuck I wanna fuck you mother-fucking baby" I don't know what SHIT, and maybe I'm not cool but I really hate it!!!

Anna Rose, Saturday, 11 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

anna what is yr line on this question?

mark s, Saturday, 11 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

fuck fuck fuck I want to fuck you motherfucking baby would be the greatest sample ever to use in a house or techno track.

Ronan, Saturday, 11 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Rap was EVER cool??!

Rap is always cool! Some of its practitioners are not, granted.

Ned Raggett, Saturday, 11 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

rap is cool. huh huhu huh hhuh

ron, Saturday, 11 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

But what about the Arab rap in Three Kings?

Ally, Sunday, 12 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Come on, by the logic of this question rap ceased to be cool as soon as someone's dad said, "anybody can do that! check it out: 'I'm the rappingest rapper that ever rappa-rappa-rapped/yo yo yo rappy rappy rappy rap!' - see?".

(PS My Dad never did this, but I did say "Know why they call it Breakdancing? Because you're liable to break your neck!" and looked around the dinner table expecting big laffs. Now he pretends he was always "down" with hiphop and says stuff like "Wow, the Pistons really DISSED the Celtics last night!".)

fritz, Monday, 13 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I mistyped there, my dad made the breakdancing joke, not me. But I think I did try and use his line the next day at recess and got even less laffs than dad.

fritz, Monday, 13 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

'Know why they call it Breakdancing? Because you're liable to break your neck!'

Or SLIP YOUR DISCO!!! Ha ha ha! How come nobody says that any more?

dave q, Monday, 13 May 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)


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