Those NME "momentous announcements"

[Back to Earth; sigh] Anyway, Conor McNicholas seemed to be doing a decent job at Muzik...

1. Ever since the Gallaghers did a hilarious interview with them a few months back they've been dying to like Oasis again, and to Get Behind Them. Oasis proceed to release undeniably crap record, but NME childishly refuse to admit it was a disappointment.

2. Prone to sweeping statements like "This is the best record since... / the best debut since... / the most important band since", generally about bands even devout NME followers will have forgotten about in a month's time.

3. Every album seems to get 9 / 10.

4. The letters page has become so terrible: the letter's are little more than variations on "I like this band, how could you slate them?" or "I hate this band, how could you praise them" or "I think this band ARE worthy of your hype, thank you for pointing me in the right direction NME". The responses are always unbearably smug (if someone points out a blatant contradiction in NME's argument, they always say 'Sure were hypocrites, but at least we have soul, unlike you, you pedant.')

5. The way they give out about the Mercury Music Prize's choices, even though most albums on it received glowing praise from the NME. And if anyone writes in to the letter's page pointing this out, they'll get the usual smug reply (see above).

Letter A goes: "Thanks for that great feature on the Sklaags, NME! I think they are the greatest band ever!" While Letter B says: "Hey NME, stop putting the Sklaags in your paper! They are shit!"

Last year many were predicting that the NME would've vanished down the media plughole by Christmas, but somehow, seven months later, it still clings on. How much longer can it sensibly last?

It's times like these where I really miss the old MM. Or hope that Tom would add more updates to FT...

It needs to stop trying to guess the NEXT BIG THING. It's just embarassing. I mean, really. The Vines won't have a top ten single if they record the next England world cup song. And it needs to stop being "shocking". Wow, the Coral take drugs? I care... why? And it has the same journalistic standards as the fucking Daily Star. And all the writers are cunts. Especially Steven Wells, Mark Beaumount, April Long, and Imran Ahmed. The last one on that list couldn't write a fucking parking ticket, let alone a music article.

i'm gonna stick my neck out here and ask why steven wells and mark beaumont are so hated as writers? i don't know enough about their critical histories to defend their tastes, but i've always found their writing to be very readable, always entertaining

anyway the only thing the nme is good for anymore is bile. and everyone knows that even that is not to be trusted

Oh and Dom, if you think "and then they lez up" is very creepy, can I ask WHY ON EARTH you hang out on ILX where that very same phrase is CANON?

his article on christian rock was funny and the stalking article showed good thinking.

Never thought he was a Lester bangs wannabe as his tastes are very very diferent. I don't think he likes the velvets for instance.

Mark beaumont i nevah thought much of really.

I agree w/ sarah. Capital letters ROOLZ!

1981.
Dammit, that's when it went all wrong for EVERYTHING.

And I'm sure capital letters were THE WAY FORWARD back then too.
(mark s check those old copies!)

Yes to both. I need to finally get around to writing something new for FT.

Err... from what I can gather, Coldplay have released an album that they really like, The Strokes don't wear underwear, there's a music festival on... and that really is about it. If one of those was the monumentous announcement then there you have it. There isn't much at all in this weeks issue other than lots an lots and LOTS of pictures of The Strokes (including a gloosy pull-out poster).
I don't mind the writers, I don't mind the reviews, I just wish there was more to read generally, and there just isn't anymore.

and then they all lez up (wells) - 'ironic' lechery

?

and then they all lez up (wells) - 'ironic' lechery

it was yr "?" that did you in

A book should be put out with a collection of his writings. I would definetely get it.

and was that review, in your view, perfect?

i did a handful of concert reviews for them (last year, in a toronto concert correspondent stylee) before they turfed the majority of their web-side content department (ie. i lost my job when my editor did)

the review wasn't perfect, nah. but it was concise, witty, wry and coyly r*ckist: all the things that nme are good for

You could argue this is the fault of the bands as much as the paper, but if the NME actually bothered to cover anything other than its increasingly small coterie of favourite bands (live reviews excepted) maybe it would be different. And most importantly I hate the way that for a paper that supposedly prides itself on championing new music, the ON interviews have been reduced to 200-word press releases for idiots.

Wells = great political writer, shite at actually capturing the essence of a record beyond "this ROCKS, this SUCKS", but brilliant at humour. He should stop writing about music and start savaging major public figures for a career.

''Wells = great political writer, shite at actually capturing the essence of a record beyond "this ROCKS, this SUCKS", but brilliant at humour. He should stop writing about music and start savaging major public figures for a career.''

he has started writing fiction and he does have a publishing thingy called 'ATTACK BOOKS!' if i rememeber correctly. I wouldn't be surprised if he left NME for good to concentrate on this.

Talk about facts I was much happier not knowing. Thanks NME!

When all 3 existed there seemed a competition for the same ground. Now, for example, Muzik, Kerrang, Mixmag and Uncut know exactly who their readers are and none of them are likely to jump ship to the NME.

The question is, reading everyone's comments, who are the NMEs readers.

So imagine how betrayed those old accordionists must feel.

NME was better in the old days = ACCORDIANISM.

Great news folks: in the NME this week the momentous announcement has finally arrived a week late:

Steve Lamacq's Evening Session on Radio 1 Tuesday to Thursday will be axed at the end of December. The Monday show will survive.

This man has inflicted awful music on a generation of youngsters for the past decade. Just how bad is Lamacq's legacy and influence over music. the 90's legacy is slowly going - no more Chris Evans on radio/tv, no more Select magazine and now Lammo has had 3 evening shows axed.

[crack open beer DG !]

It will be replaced with a broader based music show, details to follow. What would you like to hear in this slot?

...the second announcement Pulp have lost their record deal with Island/Universal.

"Dual Shocking at Reading"

''...the second announcement Pulp have lost their record deal with Island/Universal.''

Just borrowed their last alb from the rec library and you can see why it's happened though i really like it but there are no 'hits' are there?

dom...are you being sincere?

NME unveils further design changes
http://www.pressgazette.co.uk/story.asp?sectioncode=1&storycode=41021&c=1

it's all gone wrong

oh dear... cold(bore) / (dull)play and NME

The first issue showcasing the new design runs alongside a partnership between indie band Coldplay and NME to give away a collectable seven-inch vinyl of the band’s comeback single Violet Hill - the only physical release of the single. It also comes with a double A-side track A Spell A Rebel Yell, that will only ever appear with the NME.

http://bp1.blogger.com/_K4e8KJXQxe0/SB2LM9Yvd-I/AAAAAAAAAmw/uolbf2nUjS4/s320/P1030755.JPG

I am going to send DJ Martian one of these for his next birthday.

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PermalinkTim_Holmes 6 days ago 1 point
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When it goes perfect bound we will know the end has come.

[cold(bore) / (dull)play]

Life on Mars!

When it goes perfect bound we will know the end has come.

This is a witty publishing joke that I didn't immediately get, isn't it?

not really, no.

that rebel yell song is the best thing coldplay have ever done and probably will ever do. sounds like an OMD b-side from 1986.

have an open mind...

re: that rebel yell song is the best thing coldplay have ever done and probably will ever do.

gulp...i have to agree..

listen:
http://hypem.com/search/coldplay%20rebel/1/

A Spell A Rebel Yell

80s U2 Unforgettable Fire and at times Jesus and Mary Chain hushed vocals and some swirly shoegazer sound effects

try again
http://hypem.com/search/coldplay%20rebel/

It's time once again for the NME future 50

NME: this week
http://bit.ly/JT1BJ

The new issue of NME, on sale across the UK on Wednesday 5 August (and in London a day earlier), is a Future 50 special, featuring the 50 acts pushing things forward in 2009.

La Roux is on the front cover doing a Visage impersonation, but what are other other 49 bands / artists / innovators

xpost should La Roux do a cover of Fade to Grey

That wasn't an xpost.

That's never an xpost.
xpost

Ooh this was fun last year.

xpost ha "don't argue with me"

La Roux should cover...

CABARET VOLTAIRE - don't argue
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jS0QC1m4SO0

"I'm a whole new kind of pop star"

new = miserable naive purveyor of insubstantial synthpop?

also said it before but lol word count per 2 pages
http://www.nme.com/images/thums/218_magspread_laroux_L30809.jpg

http://www.nme.com/images/thums/218_magspread_laroux_L30809.jpg

i wish people would stop calling la roux synthpop. it's insulting.

softsynthpop then

La Roux should do a cover of this: with the lyrics "A New Kind Of WoMan"

John Foxx - A New Kind Of Man Live
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6_1EkxerLQ

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_pgq84N6OLYc/SngSo2xe8vI/AAAAAAAAAEw/RzaDaMoaHQQ/s1600-h/magImage.jpg

Visage - Mind Of A Toy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C7fytJURpos

Animal Collective have been named the most innovative force in music, according to NME's "The Future 50".
http://bit.ly/qzH66

Meanwhile, Go Girl magazine are going with Hannah Montana is cool, plus a free sparkly stationery set.

http://www.gogirlmag.co.uk/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYpuCzw2RWs

And Performing Songwriter are doing a big splash on Pink.

http://www.performingsongwriter.com/

Building Magazine runs down the top 150 contractors and housebuilders of 2009. No mention for Florence and the Machine, perhaps surprisingly.

http://www.building.co.uk/issue.asp?navcode=500

Meanwhile, the September 1924 edition of Punch opts for "Ramsay Macdonald is a Communist".

http://www.learningcurve.gov.uk/coldwar/G1/images/c2_s4.jpg

more your amusement: one liners on all 50 encouraged

NME Future 50 via
London dominates NME Future list of cool | thelondonpaper.com
http://bit.ly/iCmfT

1: Animal Collective
2) The Knife
3) Trent Reznor
4) Dizzie Rascal,
5) Omar Souleyman (AGE)
6) The XX
7) Jack White
8) VBS TV
9) Little Boots
10) La Roux

And the rest:

11) Blocks Recording Club

12) Dan the Automator

13) Mattias Arrelid

14) Bradford Cox

15) Norwich

16) Nick Zinner

17) Mike Sniper

18) Pop Justice

19) Twitter

20) The Big Pink

21) Platform Magazine

22) Ray Tintori

23) The Dream

24) Gigbaby

25) Salem

26) Micachu

27) Bandstocks.com/Patrick Wolf

28) Take That’s stage show

29) Sonic Boom

30) Beck

31) Greg Kurstin

32) Sweden

33) Seb chew

34) Hyperdub

35) Rostam Batmanglij

36) Lady GaGa

37) Project Natal

38) Aldene Johnson and Hannah Marshal

39) Opera

40) Stephen McGregor

41) 3OH!3

42) Blackout Crew

43) Sonar Festival

44) Star and Shadow Cinema

45) Cooly G

46) Diesel-U-Music Radio

47) Yo Gabba Gabba

48) Invasion

49) Xenomania

50) Gaggle

Haha that's such a "we don't know what we're supposed to like any more" list.

sonic boom? in 2009????

i mean i love the dude but

15) Norwich - are the supporting Norwich City, Grant Holt and Bryan Gunn?

Psychedelia Smith maybe?

Psychedelia Derbyshire? Sonic Boom? Is it 1989 again?

I bet Omar Souleyman is confused as hell to be on that list.

Also, The Lex is gonna explode when he sees 45).

25) Salem - agree with Salem one of the most interesting new artists around, when will they unleash their debut album ?

but no listing for the sublime American band: Twisted Wires

If only Sonic had worked on his dancing, maybe he could have moved up a place?

dan the automator???

beck? how is this the future

NME blog: The Future 50 - The Innovators Pushing Music Forward
http://bit.ly/4d6Kk

only heard of half the list, maybe that's a bad thing. thought they'd be up on Toddla T by now. good that The Knife are so high.

shouldn't Fever Ray be included for 2009 not the Knife?

reminder of last year's list (lots of 'what is this, THE PAST?' type remarks then too surely)

50. Nova Dando & Petra Storrs (Designers)
49. eMusic
48. Franki Chan (DJ)
47. Ian Rogers (Software developer)
46. Adem
45. Spank Rock
44. Owen Pallett (Producer)
43. James Rutledge (Remixer)
42. Strange Place Club (Promoters)
41. The Hype Machine
40. Honey Owens (Atlas Sound/Valet and Rad Summer)
39. The Horrors
38. David Brewis (Producer, Promoter, Field Music)
37. Mike Skinner
36. HeartsRevolution
35. NASA (Supergroup)
34. Tony Allen (Percussionist)
33. Ladyfest (Festival)
32. Diplo
31. Sam Kilcoyne (Founder Underage Festival)
30. Huw Stevens (DJ)
29. JME
28. The Futureheads
27. Bjork
26. Samuel Dust (Late of The Pier)
25. Tetonik Kids of France
24. Alex Hancock (Head of music for Skins)
23. Danja (Producer)
22. James Ford (Producer)
21. Santogold
20. Jonathon Ive (iPod designer)
19. The Canadian Government (Subsidies to bands)
18. Kate Moross (Designer)
17. Dirty Projectors
16. Last.fm
15. Geoff Barrow (Portishead)
14. Italians Do It Better (Label)
13. Wiley
12. Dev Hynes (Lightspeed Champion)
11. Club Smell
10. Crystal Castles
09. Alex Turner
08. Damon ALbarn
07. Rick Rubin
06. Saam (Video director)
05. Burial
04. Fucked Up
03. Radiohead
02. MIA
01. David Sitek

19. The Canadian Government (Subsidies to bands)

Gordon, slip the Wurzels a tenner and you're a shoe-in for 2010.

Last year's list had the Futureheads on it???

11) Blocks Recording Clu

These guys have been doing this since at least 2004. Remember that mental version of 'Hey ya!'?

I think the ILXor count has fallen from one to zero compared to last year's list. :-/ Or perhaps we're up to many, if we count the residents of Norwich, Sweden, and Twitter.

I saw the video for Summertime Clothes on MTV2 and it is clear to me that Animal Collective aren't gonna make it because they have made the mistake of mixing their music to be virtually inaudible on TV.

lol @ nme.com blog comments: "the intern you got to write this must have been wanting to get home early"

NME's Future 50 mocked by a blog
http://bit.ly/10vLjn

unfunny

That wasn't even really mockery, it was just... words

I like how they put Twitter and VBS in there but not Spotify. Spotify needs to be sorting out its Bungs Department asap.