This is the thread where we are making up all kinds of weird conspiracy theories about music

You guys are all aware that Paul McCartney died in November 1966, right?

Well, there are still some hidden facts. It is being said he was killed in a car accident, but this is actually a cover story. The truth is that he was killed. By Ringo Starr.

You know, out of four Beatles members, only Ringo used an alias. Why should he do so if it doesn't mean he has something to hide?

Obviously, Ringo did have a motive for killing Paul. He was of course jealous. Jealous about Paul's singing voice and songwriting abilities.

Now, some people may remark that why should Ringo be jealous of Paul only, and not the others.
But then.... Use your brain! Don't let the mainstream media fool you. Neither John nor George is alive today, right?

Of course, Ringo killed John and George as well. He was horribly jealous of John's talent, and hired Mark David Chapman to kill John and get the blame.

Now, in the case of George Harrison, he had less solo success and got fewer of his songs on the albums of The Beatles, so Ringo wasn't all that jealous to begin with. But then, George's solo career, after a dip since the mid 70s, would really take off in the 80s, with the "Cloud Nine" album and Traveling Wilburys, whereas Ringo's solo career has never really taken off after the "Ringo" album. Which is why Ringo first hired a guy to try to kill him in late 1999. This still failed, however, so Ringo then secretly attended a Bilderberger meeting and got help from Illuminati, HAARP and the Freemasoners to poison his food so that he would finally get rid of George as well.

This is really easy to see, if you just put two and two together, and you guys need to be more critical of the mainstream media if you don't see this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nlQHoelGzbM&feature=plcp

I think there's a scream in the background of Ohio Players' "Fire" that rumor had it was a murder in the studio during the recording...that's a particularly stupid one (but i guess no more stupid than Paul Is Dead)

Merzbow once sent Stevie Nicks a fossilized turd as fan mail.

You can hear Yoko Ono ringing the studio doorbell on Spontaneous Music Ensemble's 'Karyobin'.

Glenn Gould and Leonard Bernstein had a bedpost notch competition going for a few years in the 70s.

Alan McGee was initiated as a freemason in 1993.

Dennis Hopper and Miles Davis undertook a Performance-style "soul swap" on the set of 'The Hot Spot'.

Mike Love was right about Pet Sounds and all that other arty shit.

If you play the radio edits of gangsta rap records backwards, you can hear words like 'bitches' and 'dick' and references to doing drugs and shooting people.

Jeru Tha Damaja now earns his crust selling bicycles at Hackney Wick of a Sunday.

Kraftwerk were abducted by alien reptiloids after their first three albums. Everything from "Autobahn" onwards was written and performed by robots.

a certain group of individuals were so inspired by hearing the disparate brilliance of Stockhausen and James Brown that they decided to form their own band, and that band grew up to be... Geir Hongro.

A friend of mine actually considers that true of Annie Lennox after the first few Eurythmics LPs.

The Kraftwerk robot thing I mean.

Scott Walker spent a "lost decade" in moldy pubs watching fat men play darts.

The Inner Dialogue album was written entirely by ex-Nazi Neuro-Linguistic Programming experts in the CIA's employ. Most soft psych/harmony pop albums of the late 60s were, in fact.

There are many ways that one might achieve success in the entertainment industry. One is by pledging fealty to a secretive group of Satanic plutocrats and committing ritual murder to seal the deal. Once one has been accepted into this order, a certain measure of success and celebrity is guaranteed, but one's art must in some way elevate the glory of Satan. The Rolling Stones' murder of Brian Jones is perhaps the most well-known victim of this sort of Satanic blood sacrifice, but there are many others. Clues to the existence of this cult and the nature of its murderous demands may be found in the lyrics of bands and artists like Blue Oyster Cult, Alice Cooper, the Flaming Lips and Andrew W.K.

made judicious use of flag post

Contenderizer OTM.

U-God has wings.

The real reason for Metallica's vehement opposition to file-sharing? None of them ever learned to use a computer.

Bruce Springsteen is a Soviet secret agent planted in the 60s to lead a Communist revolution through the youth of America. The plan included using songs developed an NKVD developed psychological program of science of mass-deception by using American imagery within the songs to stir up emotional nationalism while covering up their socialist underpinnings.

Punk was actually invented by a cabal of mediocre middle-aged producers, jealous of the success of Yes, ELP, etc. Useful idiots were picked from the street at random and brainwashed into thinking they could form bands with no musical ability, while Bill Grundy was blackmailed into provoking outrage on air. This enabled a wrecking ball to be taken to the mid 70s music scene. The plan backfired because the producers' own group was shite and failed to make a dent in the charts.

Strangely, I think the latter is no description of a conspiracy theory, but merely an actual conspiracy.... :)