Now that rock stars are old enough to be dropping like flies...

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Create a cruel tabloid headline of the future!

― dave q, Thursday, 26 September 2002 06:31 (twenty-two years ago) link

' STOP MAKING SENSE - Rocker Byrne has Alzheimer's'

― dave q, Thursday, 26 September 2002 06:33 (twenty-two years ago) link

"IT COULD BE NICE TO BE ALIVE- Beasties Perish In Plane Smash"

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 26 September 2002 06:52 (twenty-two years ago) link

"Now Bob Dylan, too, is blowin' in the wind..."

― Justyn Dillingham (Justyn Dillingham), Thursday, 26 September 2002 07:06 (twenty-two years ago) link

Johnny Cash: "There Goes The Man In Black"

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 26 September 2002 07:09 (twenty-two years ago) link

"Denny Laine Back In Wings"

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 26 September 2002 07:09 (twenty-two years ago) link

mick jagger: "quadraplegic, and unable to tour: now we can all get some satisfaction"

lou reed: "vicious - you hit me with an anvil"

― geeta (geeta), Thursday, 26 September 2002 08:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

BOWIE LAID LOW
NAS DESPERATELY ILL(MATIC)
WE WON'T FORGET ABOUT DRE

― michael wells (michael w.), Thursday, 26 September 2002 08:27 (twenty-two years ago) link

David Lee Roth Jumped

― Siegbran Hetteson (eofor), Thursday, 26 September 2002 08:52 (twenty-two years ago) link

BRITNEY SPEARED - megastar pop bint knifed by obssessive fan

― blueski, Thursday, 26 September 2002 09:23 (twenty-two years ago) link

BRITNEY SPARED - megastar pop bint survives knife attack

― blueski, Thursday, 26 September 2002 09:26 (twenty-two years ago) link

GAHAN WITH THE WIND - Mode frontman cops it for real this time!

― blueski, Thursday, 26 September 2002 09:26 (twenty-two years ago) link

WACKO JACKO TACO ATTACKO - King Of Pop chokes to death on mexican snack

― blueski, Thursday, 26 September 2002 09:32 (twenty-two years ago) link

DEAD ZEPPELIN - Jimmy Page gets turned over

― blueski, Thursday, 26 September 2002 09:34 (twenty-two years ago) link

JARVIS SHOCKER - Pulp frontman invents electrical tweed suit with fatal results

― kinski (kinski), Thursday, 26 September 2002 10:17 (twenty-two years ago) link

MOG-WHY? - Stuart Braithwaite hangs himself with last remaining strand of hair.

― kinski (kinski), Thursday, 26 September 2002 10:21 (twenty-two years ago) link

Brittney Hears The Voice of God.
Elvis Does the Death Wiggle.
Celine's Heart Will Go On, but not Her Body

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Thursday, 26 September 2002 10:22 (twenty-two years ago) link

Keith Richards No Longer "Not Dead Yet"

― dave225 (Dave225), Thursday, 26 September 2002 10:24 (twenty-two years ago) link

NASHVILLE SKYLINE-AIR TO GROUND MISSILE HITS DYLAN PLANE

― Ronan (Ronan), Thursday, 26 September 2002 10:29 (twenty-two years ago) link

NICK CAVES IN

― blueski, Thursday, 26 September 2002 10:50 (twenty-two years ago) link

GENESIS NEMESIS / GENESIS: THE END

― blueski, Thursday, 26 September 2002 10:59 (twenty-two years ago) link

BOWIE LAID LOW
Oscure Joke: Shouldn't that be BOWI LAID LOWE?

― Lord Custos Alpha (Lord Custos Alpha), Thursday, 26 September 2002 11:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

New York Times, Dec 7th, 2277
"EVEN IF ELVIS WAS STILL ALIVE BACK IN THE 80s AND 90s, HE'S MOST CERTAINLY DEAD BY NOW. ESPECIALLY IF HE WAS STILL EATING THOSE PEANUT BUTTER, BACON AND BANANA SANDWICHES"

or maybe a bit more succint:

"ELVIS AARON PRESLEY: DEAD. JUST FRIGGIN ACCEPT IT"

― Lord Custos Alpha (Lord Custos Alpha), Thursday, 26 September 2002 11:04 (twenty-two years ago) link

Lemmy Kilminster: Dead Men Tell No Tales

― Siegbran Hetteson (eofor), Thursday, 26 September 2002 11:38 (twenty-two years ago) link

LEMMY OUTTA HERE!

― blueski, Thursday, 26 September 2002 12:46 (twenty-two years ago) link

Phil Collins, 132 years old and still making records....

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Thursday, 26 September 2002 14:17 (twenty-two years ago) link

... World Kills Self.

― dave225 (Dave225), Thursday, 26 September 2002 14:25 (twenty-two years ago) link

DEADDIE VAN HALEN

― Aaron A., Thursday, 26 September 2002 14:27 (twenty-two years ago) link

FLEA FLEES.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Thursday, 26 September 2002 14:32 (twenty-two years ago) link

JOHNNY ROTTING

― Aaron A., Thursday, 26 September 2002 14:47 (twenty-two years ago) link

Living In A Box Found Dead In A Box

― Stewart Osborne (Stewart Osborne), Thursday, 26 September 2002 14:49 (twenty-two years ago) link

MOMUS MORTUS!

― Aaron A., Thursday, 26 September 2002 14:50 (twenty-two years ago) link

BEETHOVEN ROLLS BACK OVER (when Berry dies of course)

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 26 September 2002 14:55 (twenty-two years ago) link

David Crosby dies.

― Simp Chimpleton (Rahul Kamath), Thursday, 26 September 2002 15:03 (twenty-two years ago) link

Actual headline from the New York Post when Jerry Garcia died:

HEAD DEADHEAD DEAD!

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 26 September 2002 15:16 (twenty-two years ago) link

PUFF DEADY

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 26 September 2002 15:18 (twenty-two years ago) link

Dead Can't Really Dance. They Just kinda...lie there...

― Lord Custos Alpha (Lord Custos Alpha), Thursday, 26 September 2002 16:05 (twenty-two years ago) link

This thread opens up all sorts of opportunities to say something flippant about Warren Zevon; I may be a sick, sadistic fuck, but even I have to draw the line somewhere.
________________________________
"Surgeon General reports 'Life Will Kill Ya' "

― Lord Custos Alpha (Lord Custos Alpha), Thursday, 26 September 2002 16:08 (twenty-two years ago) link

...And You Will Know Us as a Band with Several Dead Members.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Thursday, 26 September 2002 16:09 (twenty-two years ago) link

Kurt Cobain was always such a braggart...always shooting his mouth off...

― Lord Custos Alpha (Lord Custos Alpha), Thursday, 26 September 2002 16:11 (twenty-two years ago) link

808 In State

Eminumb

Soul Coffin

Limp Bizkit

Dead Or Alive....um, dead i'm afraid

― blueski, Thursday, 26 September 2002 16:22 (twenty-two years ago) link

Pyrestarter! - Prodigy wildman gets put out

Dead Rot Chilly Peppers

R.I.P Macca - and we never thought he'd croak again after the Frog Chorus

― blueski, Thursday, 26 September 2002 17:07 (twenty-two years ago) link

For Q-Tip: "Breathe. And Stop."

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 26 September 2002 17:23 (twenty-two years ago) link

Did anybody do a tasteless thing around Layne Staley and "Man in the Box" when he bought it?

― wl (wl), Thursday, 26 September 2002 17:37 (twenty-two years ago) link

Eminumb had me laughing out loud.

"NO KIDDING THIS TIME, HE REALLY *IS*" -- Paul McCartney actually dead.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 26 September 2002 17:45 (twenty-two years ago) link

Richard Hell Bound

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 26 September 2002 17:49 (twenty-two years ago) link

The Cure Failed

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 26 September 2002 17:50 (twenty-two years ago) link

This Mortal Coil Shuffled Off!

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 26 September 2002 17:53 (twenty-two years ago) link

Stroke Suffers Stroke

(must....stop....now...)

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 26 September 2002 17:57 (twenty-two years ago) link

Peter Murphy's Dead. He's Dead, He's Dead, He's Dead.

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Thursday, 26 September 2002 18:29 (twenty-two years ago) link

Skipping 63 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

Morrissey: The Queen Is Dead

Rocket To The Crypt

Manics Meet Preacher

Tragedy strikes Midnight Oil: Peter Garrotted, Hirst hurt'n, No-Moginie, Rotsey rotting, Hillman now Bones.

― Poppy (poppy), Saturday, 28 September 2002 18:06 (twenty-two years ago) link

Gary Cherone: There's a hole in his heart

― Siegbran Hetteson (eofor), Saturday, 28 September 2002 18:12 (twenty-two years ago) link

FAITHFULL NO MORE - Marianne overdoses on her Sisters Morphine

THERES NO OTHER WAY - Charmless man, 'Damon Albarn' departs the world hara-kiri style, proclaiming that Modern Life is Rubbish. Country rejoices!!

MADONNA A GONER

NIKKI SIXX FEET UNDER - Infection from penis tattoo kills Motley Crew bassist

― kinski (kinski), Saturday, 28 September 2002 19:12 (twenty-two years ago) link

NOT GETTING BETTER: Shed 7 go to heaven after coach crash..um, in Devon.

― kinski (kinski), Saturday, 28 September 2002 19:21 (twenty-two years ago) link

BRUCE STINGSPLEEN: Rocker dies after swallowing killer bee

LISA GERRARD: Dead can't dance

― kinski (kinski), Saturday, 28 September 2002 19:30 (twenty-two years ago) link

DEAD KENNEDY DEAD AT KENNEDY: Jello Biafra dies of heart failure at airport

― Nate Patrin, Saturday, 28 September 2002 19:52 (twenty-two years ago) link

Here's one thats painfully obvious....
Pete Townshend: "Grew Old Before He Died"

― Lord Custos Alpha (Lord Custos Alpha), Saturday, 28 September 2002 23:40 (twenty-two years ago) link

CLEANING OUT HIS COFFIN
Eminem dies in alcohol-related crash after being dared to drive; world feels so empty

― My name is Kenny, Sunday, 29 September 2002 01:34 (twenty-two years ago) link

THE SHOW MUST GO ON - OR MUST IT? scientists exercise the new cure for death (tm) on freddy mercury, tragically he lasted only five minutes before he had a sheer heart attack.

― di smith (lucylurex), Sunday, 29 September 2002 05:08 (twenty-two years ago) link

BELINDA CARBOMBED. GINA: "SCHOCKED!" REST OF BAND: LIPS SEALED.

― Jody Beth Rosen, Sunday, 29 September 2002 05:45 (twenty-two years ago) link

FUN BOY THR... TWO.

― Jody Beth Rosen, Sunday, 29 September 2002 05:54 (twenty-two years ago) link

good one jody -- some stil-americans and other emmigrants who can afford not to cashing in on cheap housing subsidies in UN (who cares about them) mandated illegal shouldn't even be war zone type meditarraneana believe heaven's not only on earth but set up next to a concentration camp

― george gosset (gegoss), Sunday, 29 September 2002 08:25 (twenty-two years ago) link

"JOEY IS A PUNK CADAVER- Ramones Frontman Gets Sedated"

Yes, I know...

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Sunday, 29 September 2002 10:34 (twenty-two years ago) link

YES WE REALLY ARE THE ROBOTS! - German electronic pioneers Kraftwerk have had their brains transplanted into robotic forms of themselves from the 1970's. They hope to complete their long awaited new album by 2080.

― jel -- (jel), Sunday, 29 September 2002 11:43 (twenty-two years ago) link

Fergal Sharkey - SIX FEET UNDERTONES

― NickH, Sunday, 29 September 2002 12:42 (twenty-two years ago) link

FOR SQUIRRELS NOW TO SQUIRRELS [already happened/probably never used]

DON'T IT MAKE HER BROWN EYE BLUE: Crystal Gayle sodomized by horse

― Andy K (Andy K), Sunday, 29 September 2002 13:36 (twenty-two years ago) link

Your second suggestion is SICK AND WRONG. Well done.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 29 September 2002 13:57 (twenty-two years ago) link

LIVE AFTER DEATH
Bruce Dickinson revived
"I wasn't fookin breathin man"

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Sunday, 29 September 2002 17:06 (twenty-two years ago) link

PETER PERRISH - Only Ones frontman dies in house fire

― zebedee (Jeff W), Monday, 30 September 2002 08:39 (twenty-two years ago) link

three months pass...

Megaded - Mustaine hanged by own parachute

Badly Mauled Boy - Lion goes for the hat

Bright Eyes - Burned in a fire

Radio-Wed - Thom Yorke marries childhood sweetheart

Radio-Bred - "It's a boy" reveals Thom

Radio Ble - Frontman lacerates chest on cutting edge

Radiodead - 108 yr old rock star dies in freak bingo accident

― mei (mei), Saturday, 4 January 2003 12:10 (twenty-two years ago) link

NO LONGER 'WITH' US - Faux-Punk/Pop Moppet Avril Lavigne dies from COMPLICATIONS after a freaking Sk8ing accident.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Saturday, 4 January 2003 12:22 (twenty-two years ago) link

HE REACHED FOR HIS REVOLVER
Mission of Burma guitar man Roger Miller commits suicide because wife does not grant him divorce.

KISS OFF: PAUL STANLEY ARRESTED FOR KILLING GENE SIMMONS

HAPPY
Keith states he is ecstatic Mick Jagger's bloated body found washed up on French Riviera beach.

HOW CAN I LAUGH WHEN MY BED IS BURNING?
Bald Headed Mindnight Oil Singer Dies in Hotel Fire

― KID WHSKEY, Saturday, 4 January 2003 13:26 (twenty-two years ago) link

HEAD LIKE A HOLE - Trent Reznor found dead w/ self-inflicted gunshot wound. Hopefully he is now closer to God.

― fletrejet, Saturday, 4 January 2003 15:12 (twenty-two years ago) link

Di,

>>Morrissey: The Queen Is Dead
Rocket To The Crypt<<

Absolutely brilliant!

Kid,

>>HE REACHED FOR HIS REVOLVER
Mission of Burma guitar man Roger Miller commits suicide because wife does not grant him divorce.<<

I've got a BIG problem with this one! It should have read: "Mission of Burma guitar man Roger Miller commits suicide because LOUDMOUTH BITCH OF A WIFE does not grant him divorce."

― Ralley Haines, Sunday, 5 January 2003 17:24 (twenty-two years ago) link

Maurice Gibb, Bassist for the Bee Gees, Dies at 53

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Sunday, 12 January 2003 09:12 (twenty-one years ago) link

ROBERT PLANTED

― weatheringdaleson (weatheringdaleson), Sunday, 12 January 2003 10:21 (twenty-one years ago) link

Maurice Gibb's message gets through with one hour to go!

― dave q, Sunday, 12 January 2003 11:20 (twenty-one years ago) link

two years pass...

PAUL IS DEAD - NO, SERIOUSLY, HE'S REALLY DEAD; NO, WE MEAN IT, HE IS NOT ALIVE ANYMORE

GOD IS DEAD - ERIC CLAPTON INVOLVED IN HORRIBLE ACCIDENT

BEATLES TO REUNITE! - PAUL AND RINGO DIE

― musically (musically), Monday, 12 December 2005 18:38 (nineteen years ago) link

http://www.drudgereport.com/siren.gifDOVES CRY -- PRINCE DIEShttp://www.drudgereport.com/siren.gif

― älänbänänä (alanbanana), Monday, 12 December 2005 18:46 (nineteen years ago) link

He was born, and 87 years later, he was dead: Damo Suzuki

In related news: Fan describes wang spotting incident

― Mickey (modestmickey), Monday, 12 December 2005 18:49 (nineteen years ago) link

2089: NEIL YOUNG SAYS, "ARCHIVES NEXT YEAR"

― bonymaronie, Monday, 12 December 2005 18:52 (nineteen years ago) link

Highway to Hell: AC/DC die on a freak car accident.

Or, if they were good boys and are going to heaven:
AC/DC w/C.

― Caroline loves stars, Monday, 12 December 2005 19:31 (nineteen years ago) link

The men here are obsessed with other men...mentioning endless names of only men.

They think that men are the only sex in the world.

Men here don't think women are people.

I am sorry, but the music industry is sexist.
I don't care about all these male stars...

I don't care about who is a star.

My mother is a musician then alot of the men you are mentioning.

― mariesa sabriel, Monday, 12 December 2005 19:35 (nineteen years ago) link

you're on a roll!

― Susan Douglas (Susan Douglas), Monday, 12 December 2005 19:36 (nineteen years ago) link

My mother is a better musician and far more accomplished then most of the men you are mentioning here.

I am a better musician then Neil Young....
and a better writer.

I don't care about all these men....

― mariesa sabriel, Monday, 12 December 2005 19:36 (nineteen years ago) link

lay off the Neil, tho.

― Susan Douglas (Susan Douglas), Monday, 12 December 2005 19:38 (nineteen years ago) link

ALL SHOOK DEAD -- Westerberg Taken Down to Hospital Too Late

MALKMUS STOPS BREATHING

― A|ex P@reene (Pareene), Monday, 12 December 2005 19:41 (nineteen years ago) link

PETTY GIRLS MAKE GRAVES
"American Girl" Troubadour, Wife Survived By Two Daughters

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Monday, 12 December 2005 20:06 (nineteen years ago) link

(I demand a bonus point for the fact that Tom Petty indeed is married with two daughters)

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Monday, 12 December 2005 20:08 (nineteen years ago) link

46 Grave.

― nickn (nickn), Monday, 12 December 2005 20:49 (nineteen years ago) link

fifty cent shot.

― Stephen C (ihope), Monday, 12 December 2005 21:22 (nineteen years ago) link

Hey, why don't you support the local artists in your neighborhoods instead of sitting her starstruck.

I am not a immature. I am not starstruck and never was.

Who cares about these people?

I could care less.

Anyone got a flyswatter?????

― Matt...suck, Monday, 12 December 2005 22:14 (nineteen years ago) link

I once was singing this professional gig ...it was a christmas concert and I was paid...
there was a harpist from Curtis Institute.

anyway....
the pastor had terminal cancer..
I sang this very high note at the end of this piece...
500 people were sitting there and .tv. cameras....

the man dropped over...right at my high note...

everyone rushed over to the pastor....

this was in Philadelphia...

It was awful...\

All I could say that night, I knocked them dead.

― mariesa sabriel, Monday, 12 December 2005 22:18 (nineteen years ago) link

The Dead Boys... alive and well at 98, explain how low carb diets, regular jogs and a healthy dose of laughter worked for them!

― Doggin it, Monday, 12 December 2005 22:23 (nineteen years ago) link

you are a fuckin' bizarre one, mariesa.

― M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Monday, 12 December 2005 22:34 (nineteen years ago) link

Mariesa, I don't think you really understand the point of this thread.

― Mickey (modestmickey), Tuesday, 13 December 2005 03:56 (nineteen years ago) link

but we love you, anyway

― jim wentworth (wench), Tuesday, 13 December 2005 04:19 (nineteen years ago) link

Daltrey Didn't Quite Get His Wish

Aneurysm Breaks Matthew Wilder's Stride

Mayer No Longer Invincible

Marchant Dies, ILM Traffic Declines By 64%

Clayton-Thomas Dies, Child Born to Carry On

― Joseph McCombs (Joseph McCombs), Tuesday, 13 December 2005 06:32 (nineteen years ago) link

EKG Soudsystem

― jed_ (jed), Tuesday, 13 December 2005 07:49 (nineteen years ago) link

ECG, obv.

― jed_ (jed), Tuesday, 13 December 2005 07:52 (nineteen years ago) link

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