songs for a ROCKIN' christmas?

There's a great Rocket from the Crypt song called "Cancel Christmas," which I find particularly useful for those moments of unburnished hate against the goons of the world in their December mode.

My favorite Christmas song is the one where Fred gets run over by a reindeer that hates his self-concious jumping onto things the second it's "okay" to do so. Or is that not a song?

I don't know what my favorites are 100%. "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)" by Darlene Love, probably, and "Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town" by Bruce Springsteen. I don't have any favorite Christmas albums, though the closest would be Phil Spector's. I really like that new Christmas song Britney Spears did. Oh, and "Santa Baby" by Eartha Kitt. Not Madonna's version though, it's annoying.

"Jingle Bells" by Bing Crosby and the Andrews Sisters. It rocks. Booker T. and the MGs also did a killer "Jingle Bells". As for albums my favorites are the Phil Spector one and the Three Suns' "Ding Dong Dandy Christmas" which has some fantastically strange accordion/xylophone/organ arrangements. Stevie Wonder's "Ave Maria" makes me cry. Also anything from those Rankin- Bass Christmas specials.

Whoever said that just because thanksgiving's passed it's okay to talk about christmas can suck my nuts. Except, not you Fred, I wouldn't like that. But like, do we start talking about Groundhog Day on Jan 2nd? Maybe we SHOULD. Maybe if people put up Groundhog Day decorations (would you like to buy a life-sized neon WOODCHUCK for your lawn, anyone?) I wouldn't have to see another goddamned glowing elf in March ever again.

I dig "What A Wonderful World" - the original, though Nick Cave and Shane MacGowan also nail it on their duet. Ray Charles' xmas album is pretty fine or, as one hilarious review that I just have to keep quoting put it, is "a brilliant fusion of American sounds that presents as cogent an argument as any for the cultural preeminence of the U.S. in the twentieth century." The Qualities released a nice doo-wop single on Sun Ra's label in the '50s, on which Sunny plays harmonium, and which got released on his Singles box. "Happy new years to you!" Of course the music to A Charlie Brown Christmas by the Vince Guaraldi Trio is a must-have. Britney's song is indeed good, and after the "Stronger" video, all I want under my tree is HER. Wally fuckin' jesus pillow. And the song really is good, too! Could all chicks in pop stop what they're doing right now and make songs like this and "Independant Women Pt. 1"?

Above all else, this is a time to be crotchety, so How The Grinch Stole Christmas (not the new one, for petesake) is about as good as it gets, with the exception of John Fahey's holiday albums of solo guitar. Because not even the Grinch is as crotchety as John Fahey.

Dead Kennedys - Too drunk to fuck

SLADE! SLADE! What is wrong with you people?

Oh yeah, you're not British. Except for you DJ Martian: you have no excuse.

Slade were the liberation of Christmas: from the bloody Kings Singers to Noddy Holder leering about stockings in one glorious swoop.

since someone just mentioned Slade, as an UK-type living in the US, i caught someone in my office playing "Cum On Feel The Noize" really loudly and proclaiming it a 'classic', but.. it wasn't the Slade version! Or, indeed the Oasis one. It appeared to be some cheesy late- 80s version, and my colleagues seemed to think it the original article. Blasphemy! Can anyone tell me who did that version?

ohyeah - Xmas song? How about the "Minder" Christmas song, "What Are We Gonna Get For Xmas For 'Er Indoors", or similar? I have it on mp3 somewhere, ohdear.

The Charlie Brown Christmas record by Vince Guaraldi is the only Christmas album anyone born since 1960 needs. If the piano tone on that album doesn't make you cry, you had a much happier childhood than I did. I'm getting misty right now just thinking about it...all that tree needed was a little love...isn't that true for all of us?

I can only think of a trifling number...Clarence Carter - "Back Door Santa", The Fall - "No X Mas for John Quays", Mr. Garrison "Merry Fucking Christmas", and the RYL one (the name escapes me right now, but I'm sure Ned would be happy to fill you in). That should give you a pretty good idea of my attitude towards most Christmas music.

Uh... I may be overlooking something but I think the only Christmas song I own is the Flaming Lips' "Christmas at the Zoo." Well, that and the Low _Christmas_ EP, but that really did feel like a gift, once I bought it. Otherwise, I do not regard this as a deficiency in my collection.

Oh - but thre is a Soul Coughing promo containing "Suzy Snowflake," their Christmas song, that I wanted once. So there's something at least. I didn't buy it though. I wanted it for the live version of "Screenwriters' Blues" because it had no swearing ("the radioman laughs because the radioman fucks a model too") and was potentially easier to play on the radio. Too bad it BIT.

h01:

I'm guessing you were listening to the Quiet Riot version, which indeed is the only version I've ever heard, me being an American type living in America.

I'm not in the mood for Christmas music at all. It's staggering how bad most Christmas music is. Why the Archies never made a Christmas record is something I'll never understand.

Kris.

We forgot Slade, Tom, because Merry Xmas Everybody is the most overrated Christmas song this side of Jingle Bells. I mean it's not a terrible song, it's an alright song, but it's not even remotely up there with Darlene Love (as Dave Letterman says EVERY FUCKING YEAR on New Years Eve: that's the only Christmas song as far as we're concerned), or the Boss, or even Britney Friggin' Spears. I was making this holiday tape for my mom this weekend and I put the song on there, since: A) it's a song she knows and probably likes enough. B) Christmas songs are really fucking short and I was running out of ideas for the 90 minute tape.

So anyhow, I do this, then later I'm thumbing through Platinum Christmas to get more ideas for the end of the tape, and I accidentally-I-swear put on Steps' version of Merry Xmas Everybody and all I could do was kick myself because, quite frankly, my mom probably would've liked that version a lot better because it's more "fun". I totally failed in my mission and NO WAY was I going to retape 7 songs just to put a different version of a song neither of us are particularly crazy about on. Oh well.

I think I'm going to write a list of the ten most important Christmas songs on my website, because I'm a little listless and tired right now and I need something to distract me. The problem is, I'd have to think of ten that I really, really like, not just the three I keep naming over and over on this forum.

I'm more or less with Tom on the Slade question. I like all the trashy rocking Xmas numbers, because they instantly bring Christmases past. Paul McCartney's artlessly chugging 'Simply having a wonderful Christmas time' is great for this reason too.

*But* if you want to get all cool on us (and let's face it, Xfm's new charity compilation isn't the place to start; indie at Christmas being a definite no-no) then someone's already done the work for yo!. Have a look at the exotically named Falstaff Dvorak's two volumes of Christmas mix tapes at: http://www.artofthemix.com/FindAMix/getcontents.asp?strMixID=7496 and http://www.artofthemix.com/FindAMix/getcontents.asp?strMixID=7497

I don't know how many records this man owns but it must be more than a burglar would know what to do with.

Nick xx

P.S. Ra Ra Ra is kind of active again for anyone who's interested (http://nickdastoor.pitas.com)

I'm frankly *staggered* that Nick D, only recently restored to the Northern Hemisphere, should neglect to mention Mary Margaret O'Hara's "Christmas EP" from 1991. The Pogues/Kirsty MacColl and, erm, Greg Lake have always had a little goosebump effect on me (Lake's comment that "punk was essentially the end of honest rock'n'roll" also brings me out in a rash), but nothing matches "Bring On The Dancing Horses". It sounds overwhelmingly Xmassy to me, was released at approximately the right time of year and mentions the Messiah at the end.

Mike.

Oh yes well, MM'OH E.P. obviously great (does anyone know if the third Henrys album has much of her on...?) *but* the subject was 'Songs for a ROCKIN' Christmas', Mik

The scary thing about RYL's Christmas contributions is that they did a whole *album* and called it _The Christmas Travesty_. Then there's the Goatboy's solo efforts:

"Oh the weather outside is frightful But the scythe is so delightful So when the blood starts to flow Let it go, let it go, let it go."

*cue bad metal chords as played on a bad synth*

Simply...having...a...wonderful...christmas....time....

Sorry, I have nothing to say, I just wanted to notify the world that my brain has exploded from reading that song being referenced here, hence making me think of the travesty that is that song, thus putting it in my head.

Honestly, I don't think Paul McCartney has done one worse song in his career. Even Martha My Dear.

Surely someone out there has heard H-Town's Christmas song?

H-Town, a trashy R&B trio who's sole claim to fame was a turgid clunker of a track called "Knockin' Da Boots", quickly recognized that they weren't going to have major success beyond this one single, which features the infamous phrase "Some body-rockin' knockin' da boots" repeated approximately 500 billion times.

So, they decided to release a Christmas version of "Knockin' Da Boots". This new mix was, by all accounts, identical to the original only the famous phrase was transformed into, "Some body-rockin' knockin' da boots (*whispered* Christmas!)" I have to say, nothing quite says Christmas to me like a horny man begging a woman for some action.

I can't find reference to this version of the song on the web, so I'm starting to suspect it might have been a private radio station mix, which in no way diminishes the inherent humor. I also recognize that this doesn't qualify as a ROCKIN' Christmas song, but hey.

The dread Quiet Riot did "Cum On Feel The Noize".

Dan's comment opens up a world of possibilities. "Who Let The Deer Out?" for one.

Nick - "ROCKIN'", yes - but I thought folks were taking it a little too literally. I'd include MMO'H if we take "ROCKIN'" to mean, erm, 'jolly good' or even 'stellar'. I don't think Fred's original question insisted on power chords. But you know this - you mentioned FabMacca.

But hey - let's not argue. It's Christmas for goodness sake! Seasons greetings to one and all!

Oh, I liked the song Destiny's Child did last night at Rockefeller Center. It was some sort of psuedo Twelve Days of Christmas, except they only did 8 days. Which is kind of a rip off, now that I think about it; why don't their baby get them stuff for the other 4 days? Cheap bastard.

i know! i was thinking, "wow, it sounds like their baby finally did right by them," and then, BOOM!, what happened to the last 4 days? though, you never know, perhaps those four days were eliminated because it led to too many verses and not enough time for the girls to sing the chorus.

What no roy wood? i personally *do* wish it was xmas every day, doesn't everyone? song has small children, large saxs, and some faded old glam "star" that never did anything else. And what about bowie & bing and john & yoko and all the other crap on "now that's what i call christmas" One year my sister and i listened to Now xmas *every nite* from about the middle of october, in a vain attempt to hasten the arrival of pressies, so all these horrendous songs are now scorched deep in my memory, jonah lewie anyone? in dulce jublio by mike oldfield, I shiver at the thought...

+XTC's "Thanks For Christmas" is my fave cause its super cheesed out. +I love Paul McCartney's "Simply having..." cause its so corny. It sounds so lumpfisted that its a perfect juxtaposition to the super- sheen Xmas songs you normally hear. +There's a version of "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree" that rules but I don't know who does it. I've heard several versions but there is one that's superior. Its got that nice guitar lick after the "...have a happy holiday" line. +Run DMC "Christmas in Hollis". Old skool comes no finer. "Oh mah gawd, a ill reindeer!" ....Brilliant. +And "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)" flat out rules.

I can't believe we've got this far and nobody's mentioned Saint Etienne's "I Was Born On Christmas Day" yet ...

When I remember how sad and melancholic Christmas can be, when you're reflecting on how the world has changed since childhood, yet you can still get a real sense of euphoria from it, despite everything, that's always the song I think of. It must be great if even Tim Burgess doesn't fuck it up :).

Oh, and if we're talking about quaint museum-piece pseudo-exotica, I must get in a word for The Would-Be-Goods' "Christmas in Haiti".

I very much agree with a lot of the suggestmions thus far. Big fan of the Charlie Brown Christmas album. Umm... just recently downloaded "Carol of the Bells" by Mermen. Easy-going guitar, bass, drum version. Happy holidays, everyone.

Tis a pitty that The Gap has already snached up and abused The Dandy Warhols' cover of "Little Drummer Boy" for the X-mas ad. Not unlike the way they destroyed "Get Busy Child" for everyone who bought the album 9 months earlier....

And while I'm @ it...anyone notice any of these?

Stereolab for Volkswagon Kid Loco and Vangelis for Victorias Secret Air for Revlon

I won't even go near Kodak.....

Springsteen -- Santa Claus is Comin' to Town. He pants a lot in that version and turns a song that isn't a rocker into one. Somehow.

Time to resurrect this thread. Several of the suggestions above are very good, I also suggest Kurtis Blow's "Christmas Rappin'"

Christmas With The Devil - Spinal Pap (er - Tap)

Yello's Jingle Bells (Santa Club Mix), nobody can sit still while this one is playing..... if you like techno type music.

I must have been on crack or just in a bitch-ass mood when I answered this last year, what was I thinking? I like xmas music...

More Christmas music on this thread. You pays your money...

I KNOW I was in a bad mood last year when I answered this thread, don't feel bad, Nic.

who knows? hey, can i test something?

ihttp://www.authentichistory.com/images/1970s/watergate/watergate_puzzle.jpg

i reckon this is more apropos

http://www.davidpatterson.com/Christmas97/tree.jpg

elvis telecom did a great mix called "christmas cookie crumbs" that should cover all your rockin' xmas needs.

http://www.quartzcity.net/~chris/blogpicts/christmas_cookie_crumbs.jpg

Disc 1:

1. XTC - "Psychedelic Christmas"
2. The cast of Twin Peaks - "The Twelve Days Of Christmas"
3. Patsy Raye - "Beatnik's Wish"
4. The Ravers - "Punk Rock Christmas"
5. Tuscadero - "Holidays R Hell"
6. Dead Moon - "Christmas Rush"
7. Jon Spencer Blues Explosion - "Big Yule Log Boogie"
8. Shitbirds - "Christmas Is A Comin' (May God Bless You)"
9. The Chills - "Christmas Chimes"
10. The Wombles - "Wombling Merry Christmas"
11. Thinking Fellers Union Local 282 - "Fat Christmas"
12. Sparks - "Thank God It's Not Christmas"
13. The Sensational Alex Harvey Band - "There's No Lights On the Christmas Tree Mother, They're Burning Big Louie Tonight"
14. Mystery Science Theater 3000 - "(Let's Have) A Patrick Swayze Christmas"
15. John Baker - "Christmas Commercial"
16. Man Or Astroman? - "Frosty The Snowman"
17. The Moog Machine - "O Holy Night"
18. August Darnell - "Christmas On Riverside Drive"
19. Hypnobeat - "Jingle Club"
20. The Raveonettes - "The Christmas Song"
21. The Walkmen - "Christmas Party"
22. Martin Mull - "Santa Doesn't Cop Out on Dope"
23. Patty Duke and Norman Vincent Peale - "You Can Keep Christmas"
24. Half Man Half Biscuit - "All I Want For Christmas Is A Dukla Prague Away Kit"

Disc 2:

1. Six Million Dollar Man - "Christmas Lights"
2. The Flaming Lips - "Christmas At The Zoo"
3. Madness - "Inanity Over Christmas"
4. Mark Mothersbaugh - "Rudolph The Space Deer"
5. The Go Go's - "I'm Gonna Spend My Christmas With A Dalek"
6. Fountains Of Wayne - "I Want An Alien For Christmas"
7. Patty Marie Jay - "Space Age Santa Claus"
8. Pink Floyd - "Merry Xmas Song"
9. The Dickies - "Silent Night"
10. Grandaddy - "Alan Parsons In A Winter Wonderland"
11. Katie's Kitchen - "Cooking A Delicious Holiday Ring Mold"
12. James Brown - "Santa Claus Go Straight To The Ghetto"
13. Saint Etienne - "I Don't Intend To Spend Christmas Alone"
14. Giant Sand - "Thank You Dreaded Black Ice, Thank You"
15. Thin White Rope - "Christmas Skies"
16. Calexico - "Gift X-change"
17. Martin Mull - "Santafly"
18. Bad News - "Cashing In On Christmas"
19. unknown - "Rocking Disco Santa"
20. Steve Martin & Paul Simon - "Silver Bells"
21. Sally Kellerman - "O Little Town Of Bethlehem"
22. Spectrum - "Santa Claus"
23. Assistant Manager of the Haybridge - "Merry Christmas"