AEI ranks "The 21 greatest conservative rap songs of all time"

Oh lord jesus.

21. Justin Bieber featuring Busta Rhymes – Drummer Boy (2011)

The first song on the list — ranked this low mostly because of its disregard for the second criterion mentioned earlier, musical quality — is a collaborative effort by teen idol Justin Bieber and past-his-heyday rapper Busta Rhymes.

...The list continues on Monday, May 13.

holy shit, are they rolling this out over the rest of the month or something?

ranked this low mostly because of its disregard for the second criterion mentioned earlier, musical quality

Like, why didn't they just go with a top 20 in this case?

thing is, idea that rap can and does express conservative ideas could use an airing. but since conservatives have forgotten the difference between thinking and trolling i doubt this will be it.

Bookmarked

I'm gonna be sad if "It's All About the Benjamin's" is not number one. Celebrates entrepreneurship AND namechecks a founding father.

*bates breath*

good to know:

As I will show by analyzing the twenty-one greatest conservative rap songs, selected based on a mix of ideological purity (primarily), musical quality, and popular appeal, all three legs of President Reagan’s “three-legged stool” are represented.

just the thing you've been waiting for—online music criticism that values "ideological purity (primarily)"!!!

(ha, just noticed autocorrect put an apostrophe in Benjamins.)

just the thing you've been waiting for—online music criticism that values "ideological purity (primarily)"!!!

― Excelsior twilight. Harpsichord wind through the trees. (bernard snowy), Sunday, May 12, 2013 5:09 PM (1 hour ago)

actually i could stand to read some music crit from like, a class analysis perspective or something

Lol @ president reagan's stool

AKB1 | May 10, 2013 at 11:27 pm

I like rap music ..... and I like cultural conservatism ....

But, which one's best?

actually i could stand to read some music crit from like, a class analysis perspective or something

Last time that happened we got a really clusterfucky thread about Pulp's "Common People." Be careful what you wish for.

YOU GUYS

http://www.aei-ideas.org/2013/05/the-21-greatest-conservative-rap-songs-of-all-time-part-7/

Oh dear.

Excellent

It is hard not to read this juxtaposition of characters as a modern rendition of Luke 7:36-50.

haha this is the kind of thing i thought it was clever to write for stylus when i was 17

when this countdown is done I'm going to post this playlist on Share My Playlists:

http://open.spotify.com/user/djperry1973/playlist/2Bbc7zGzC4pWN3CK1xgRwF

dear god I'd never heard "Drummer Boy" before

"gather round the mistletoe real quick"

a stripper named Hope (a reference to President Clinton’s activities in the Oval Office?)

I sense a trend!

http://gawker.com/republican-congressman-loves-the-conservative-message-507569466

VeryWell

Stop co-opting counterculture/minority art. It's not for you, it never was. You look like idiots to those who were into it way before you/who it was meant for, and your base doesn't appreciate/understand it. Sorry. Next?
12 minutes ago

Dave J.

Is there a way we could pay him to co-opt (and consequently destroy, through the act of making it profoundly uncool) Chief Keef's stuff?
7 minutes ago

Rubio/Tupac Hologram 2016

okay so "Brenda's Got A Baby" espouses conservative values apparently by being a story about a poor dumb black girl who is used for welfare cheats and raped by a relative

um

hooray

O_O

guys this list continues to be batshit

dude added "Tha Crossroads" and "Jesus Walks" why because Christianity

also Bieber's "Drummer Boy" remains the funniest fucking thing

has CREAM or Survival of the Fittest shown up yet?

i wonder if trinidad james' celebration of austrian hard money ideas will get its due

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d0nERTFo-Sk

fiat curren$y

has CREAM or Survival of the Fittest shown up yet?

Check the Spotify playlist upthread!

(Short answer: no but I hope they do)

Omg "Regulate" as a libertarian vigilante fantasy

one of my college buddies had to deal with the author of this on an email list while the dude was working on his econ PhD and describes him as "a complete dickhead"

Econ PhD and complete dickhead redundant, though, surely?

it was a mailing list full of econ grad students and this dude stood out, apparently

=0

Loving this

actually i could stand to read some music crit from like, a class analysis perspective or something

― 'scuse me while i make the sky cum (k3vin k.), Sunday, May 12, 2013 10:21 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

haha for some head-shaking lolz in this vein i highly recommend the maoist internationalist movement's album reviews: www.prisoncensorship.info/archive/etext/movies/‎

For a minute i thought Eminem was bringing the Revolution to MTV

thank you for that hoos

It's hard to call "Tank Girl" misogynistic since she goes around kicking gendered males in the balls, literally and figuratively. But Tank Girl and Jet are very attractive and the male figures are just not so hot: they are either militarists (ugh) or kangaroos (?).

it really is a joyous internet site

I am reposting the entire review of Aenima because it is amazing:

Tool
Aenima
BMG Music
1996

reviewed by MC5, November 1, 1999

"This sort of behavior is left to the psychotic, dogmatic, fundamentalist believers you see on your T.V. everyday letting off bombs and killing people in the name of God. Beliefs are dangerous. Beliefs allow the mind to stop functioning. A non-functioning mind is clinically dead. Believe in nothing," says the Tool CD art jacket. On the basis of this, we would hope this is another anarchist band. Our suspicions are reinforced by the Internet FAQ, which says they like their t-shirt slogan, "all Indians, no chiefs."

We at MIM believe anarchists should stick to music, poetry and art, because their political prescriptions and analysis are often lacking. We agree with the anarchists on their long-term goals of stateless society, no bosses, no coercion necessary. In the arts, the sentiments of the people are more relevant than specific analysis and plans, so our unity with the anarchists in music is usually greater than in other areas. Tool conveys a general rebelliousness and opposition to religion and that is a good thing in the context we are in.

Fans claim to see something profound in Tool's hard, psychedelic rock probably referred to as the all-encompassing "alternative." One fan--(no we can't assure you it's not a corporate set-up)--one fan at http://www.zork.net/~alhambra/east/ claims that Tool is the only band that unleashes his yin energy.

Tool refers to the "science of crying" or "lachrymology" as its inspiration. The proper word is "brooding." That is Tool. Brooding is something that imperialist country people should do, because there is much to stop ignoring. We do not mean that they should be "in touch with their inner child." No, we mean that people should be suspicious of being happy in the midst of oppression and exploitation in the U$A.

There is something of Satanic imagery behind Tool as well. We also like Tool because according to its official FAQ it met partly through Tom Morello of "Rage against the Machine."

The title of the album and first song called "Stinkfist" go together well. "Aenima" or "Aenema" (spelling controversy being deliberate) is a combination of "anima" and "enema." In MIM's opinion, the Amerikan people do have a stick up their ass that needs to be pulled out. Only a piece came out in the U.$. Civil War, but even pulling out just that bit made things much better.

"Hooker with a Penis" is a common anarchist refrain about the commoditization of art, instructing us listeners that we sold out by buying their album. It's a good point: we should be reviewing someone without corporate backing. When we at MIM review what is already popular, we may be relating to music and pointing a direction, but we are not building. "Aenema" went platinum. Hence, MIM is only relating to where the masses are already at. Let's point out the good things in Tool and move on.

The song with the same name as the title seems to be saying Los Angeles in particular should go down the drain. It would be OK for anarchists except that it makes Arizona out to be better than Los Angeles.

The album ends shouting "crying open my third eye." The eye imagery is connected to the eye on the back of the dollar bill. We like the connection of crying open an eye to see the ruling class.

The official Tool web page trails off into the mists the way the psychological side of Satanism does as well. Like a lot of music web sites, this one points to a web site against censorship. Another web site against scientology and L. Ron Hubbard is the next sharpest statement made. Since Tool is pointing toward psychology almost as a replacement for religion, it is not surprising that Tool does not approve of L. Ron Hubbard. The album is a lot like the web pages and discussion. It fades in and out of recognizable political consciousness. However, we will give Tool the credit of not being aimless. The music is also highly entertaining.

haha DJP I was gonna use that as a dname

unleashes his yin energy

you guys haven't even found their movie reviews yet

you linked the movie reviews!

oh did i

haha woops

if ugh does not change his dn to "militarists" then surely there is no god

http://www.prisoncensorship.info/archive/etext/movies/long/shrek2.html

holy shit

These are all amazing.

i knowww i was so disappointed when i realized i'd read all the ones i was ever gonna read

Voices of Hollywood actors considered sexy go into "Shrek 2"---Antonio Bandera for example--but the rich and beautiful people do not appear in the film, which is an animation.

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3

For this reviewer, the real heroes in "Moulin Rouge" are not the
prattling "bohemian revolutionaries" like the idealist Christian. The real
heroes never appear. They are the scientists, public health activists,
and above all proletarian revolutionaries who helped drive down the death
rate due to tuberculosis worldwide.

otm

There was a brief period in early 2000s where the MIM was known as the Revolutionary Internationalist Movement, and my friends and I took to referring to their review style as "RIM jobs"

man, I loved their phones

can I just

Using the past to serve the present as Mao instructed artists, the directors of "Shrek 2" rattle off cultural references like machine-gun fire.

"We only hope that there is a Shrek 3 in which the newly-weds rampage through the rest of the society and culture." What a time for optimism the 2000s were!

http://www.aei-ideas.org/2013/05/the-21-greatest-conservative-rap-songs-of-all-time-part-16/

neverending joy at this list

bahahahahahaha

I am posting the final paragraph of the "Dear Mama" entry before it is edited:

We know, by now, how it all ends: Mr. Shakur becomes successful, and gets the chance to give back to his struggling mother. It could all have been different; and his father deserves nor receives any credit for putting him in a position where he had the opportunity to produce some of the greatest rap songs of all time.

(waiting with bated breath to see if they post my relatively innocuous snide comment)

Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process Mr. Carter’s forceful insistence on due process

http://www.aei-ideas.org/2013/05/the-21-greatest-conservative-rap-songs-of-all-time-part-17/comment-page-1/#comment-278778

hooray, my innocuous lol made it

ahahaah at the dear mama thing.

we should have a poll.

i have always had a hard time believing that mim is not an elaborate hoax.

YOU GUYS THE LIST IS DONE

http://www.aei-ideas.org/2013/05/the-21-greatest-conservative-rap-songs-of-all-time-in-1-post/

I mean, holy lol

http://open.spotify.com/user/djperry1973/playlist/2Bbc7zGzC4pWN3CK1xgRwF

it was all a dream, I used to read Townhall Magazine

Life has treated him well, thanks to his skillful hard work (“Now I’m in the limelight / ’cause I rhyme tight / Time to get paid”), and this earned success is cause for celebration, as it has brought an end to his participation in a culture of dependence on Big Government: “Celebratin’ every day, no more public housin’.” But it doesn’t end there: Mr. Wallace now helps the less fortunate with private charity (“And I’m far from cheap, I smoke skunk with my peeps all day / Spread love, it’s the Brooklyn way”). And this dream is open to all who dare dream: “You know very well who you are / Don’t let ‘em hold you down, reach for the stars.”

it was all a dream, i used to read Commentary magazine

hahaha

can i just

3. Daddy Yankee – Gasolina (2004)

Ramón Luis Ayala Rodríguez, or Daddy Yankee, is the only artist on this list to have actively campaigned for a Republican presidential candidate (John McCain, in 2008). Named one of the 100 most influential people in the world by Time magazine in 2006, Daddy Yankee’s song focuses more specifically on one particular policy area than any other song on this list. In Mr. Rodríguez’s own words, it is about “energy independence.” But it is not a flimsy all-of-the-above with massive transfers of wealth to campaign donors who invest in Solyndras that he is referring to with that term. “Drill, baby, drill” is his policy proposal, which, of course, dovetailed well with former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin’s use of that chant during the 2008 campaign. It is hard not to think of the female voice in the song as a Governor Palin avant la lettre when she sings “Dame más gasolina.” And when Mr. Rodriguéz requests a tribute to the internal combustion engine (“Zúmbale mambo pa’ que mis gatas prendan los motores”), she is the one who responds (“Ella prende las turbinas”). Given all this, listening to this song a decade later, it is hard not to hear a call for more fracking.

that was breathtaking

this is all just http://www.ilxor.com/ILX/ThreadSelectedControllerServlet?boardid=77&threadid=82861

i missed this one:

Transforming the government into a middle-class insurance company that regulates light bulb type and soda cup size inevitable distracts it from its core functions. Upholding the rule of law, enforcing property rights, and effectively exercising a monopoly on violence are among those core functions. Warren Griffin III, or Warren G, and Nathaniel Dwayne Hall, or Nate Dogg, describe what society looks like when those functions fall victim to rampant government expansion in this song from the soundtrack to the movie Above The Rim. More specifically, Mr. Griffin falls victim to a carjacking in his own community.