buzz bissingers gucci addiction

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i'm surprised he didnt' just take hundreds of photos of himself in leather ballhuggers holding giant Price Is Right price tags

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:34 (eleven years ago) link

there are several things I want from my pants and none of those things is "an erection"

Darth Icky (DJP), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:36 (eleven years ago) link

you're doing it wrong then

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:36 (eleven years ago) link

somehow I don't think I am

Darth Icky (DJP), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:36 (eleven years ago) link

OH

MY

GOD

go to party leather (ENBB), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:37 (eleven years ago) link

what the shit

go to party leather (ENBB), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:37 (eleven years ago) link

is "do a sushi" a common colloquialism

A$AP Rovi (J0rdan S.), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:37 (eleven years ago) link

as a simple exercise im gonna do a find and replace of 'buy/purchase' with 'masturbate'... lets see the results

I went on favorite websites day and night—Gucci, Net-a-Porter, Neiman Marcus, Saks Fifth Avenue, Burberry, Ralph Lauren, Vince, Shopbop, ShopStyle, and, later on, Mr Porter and Moda Operandi. I masturbated in the morning when I should have been writing, and it did ramp me up to help me write. I masturbated in bed at night, happy that the melancholia of the day was over and I had somehow gotten through it and deserved a little extra. If there was an item that I had somehow warded off in the morning, I masturbated. If something caught my eye, gave me the slightest rush, I hit the "masturbate now" button. I masturbated with my cell phone while waiting to have lunch with someone, or dinner, or a drink. I masturbated while I was having lunch with someone, or dinner, or a drink, happy when they went to the bathroom so I could finish the transaction without interruption.

乒乓, Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:37 (eleven years ago) link

OK, for some reason in the middle of all of this Elmo's double post at 11:22 is killing me.

Buzz.

go to party leather (ENBB), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:38 (eleven years ago) link

If something caught my eye, gave me the slightest rush, I hit the "masturbate now" button.

the existence of this button would destroy civilization

Darth Icky (DJP), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:39 (eleven years ago) link

Using the name "Buzz Boy," he hosted a daily radio talk show on WPHT Philadelphia 1210 with Steve "Steve Man" Martorano.

On Oct. 8, 2012, Buzz endorsed Mitt Romney for president.

☠ ☃ ☠ (mh), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:40 (eleven years ago) link

the greatest evidence of buzz bissinger's psychosis is not that he has spent $600,000 on leather clothes, but that he can afford to spend $600,000 on leather clothes and still chose to host a daily radio talk show in philadelphia

A$AP Rovi (J0rdan S.), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:42 (eleven years ago) link

hahahahah

call all destroyer, Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:42 (eleven years ago) link

otm

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:42 (eleven years ago) link

I bought dozens of boots, some with a flat or low heel that any man can wear, some with five-inch heels that only a man with real balls could wear.

getting kenan vibes

Heyman (crüt), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:44 (eleven years ago) link

lol

go to party leather (ENBB), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:44 (eleven years ago) link

still chose to host a daily radio talk show in philadelphia

― A$AP Rovi (J0rdan S.), Tuesday, March 26, 2013 4:42 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark

as someone from philly, this is otm + it hurts me

乒乓, Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:45 (eleven years ago) link

I was getting a 'balls' vibe

☠ ☃ ☠ (mh), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:45 (eleven years ago) link

hahahaha curtis

A$AP Rovi (J0rdan S.), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:45 (eleven years ago) link

okay you guys, I really do try to be open-minded and accepting/tolerant of the harmless foibles of others, but:

Think it's easy to be different in America? Try something as benign as wearing stretch leather leggings or knee-high boots if you are a man.

the knowledge that I am not as liberal or accepting as I would like to be is drowning in a sea of belly lols

Darth Icky (DJP), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:46 (eleven years ago) link

I expect you to be wearing exactly that the next time I see you.

go to party leather (ENBB), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:47 (eleven years ago) link

I could totally get away with wearing stretch leather leggings to YYYs

however I am certain my balls would melt

Darth Icky (DJP), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:48 (eleven years ago) link

Think it's easy to be a woman in America? Try wearing pretty much anything.

☠ ☃ ☠ (mh), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:49 (eleven years ago) link

it's not so much a man wearing these items

it's really only 100% that it's BUZZ assface BISSINGER wearing them that makes me deliriously happy

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:49 (eleven years ago) link

I like turning around and seeing the poor lost souls in the gulag of the higher rows. I hope they hate me, chattering chipmunks trying to figure out who the fuck is this poseur, or however it's said in Fashion Italian. Then again, I don't see them dressed to kill, in an $8,000 Gucci pony-hair jacket that no one else in the U.S. has and wax-coated black jeans, shiny and sheeny and sizzling.

his jeans are on fire?

Darth Icky (DJP), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:50 (eleven years ago) link

I apologize if everyone else has already covered all of this, I just need an outlet since I can't scream with laughter at work

Darth Icky (DJP), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:50 (eleven years ago) link

i think the real joy of this piece is seeing everyone's reactions in real time

call all destroyer, Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:51 (eleven years ago) link

dressed to kill in a pony hair jacket

tee hee

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:51 (eleven years ago) link

xx-post - You kind of have to wear leather leggins to that show now. Seriously though.

go to party leather (ENBB), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:51 (eleven years ago) link

leather leggings are fun and cool, just... maybe not a wise choice if you're a man pushing 60

open the blood gates (elmo argonaut), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:52 (eleven years ago) link

ilxor males need to adopt buzz as their style spirit animal

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:53 (eleven years ago) link

Still looking around at the crowd, noticing across the runway at least twenty-five attendees from China, the Wild West for high fashion, I feel the insecure contradiction of pride and self-doubt. I look good. I do belong, but briefs from Jockey are taking away a little edge: At least no one can see them. Everything else I am wearing—the jacket, the pants, the scarf, the boots—has been chosen in careful consultation with my sales associate at the Gucci flagship store in New York, whom I think of as the Divine Stylist, except for the Jockey shorts.

I think he should have done another readthrough on this section because omg that last sentence lololololol

the pheromones of hot clothing (DJP), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:53 (eleven years ago) link

know that if I happen to meet any of u in person i expect, nay demand, leather leggings and pony hair jackets

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:54 (eleven years ago) link

it's really only 100% that it's BUZZ assface BISSINGER wearing them that makes me deliriously happy

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, March 26, 2013 4:49 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark

yeah thats what really makes this wild

turds (Hungry4Ass), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:54 (eleven years ago) link

He'd already established he picked his own underwear; that tag makes it sound like he's talking about the Divine Styler's underwear, by which I mean alternative hip-hop artist Marc Richardson

the pheromones of hot clothing (DJP), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:55 (eleven years ago) link

I want to take that tv thing he did years ago, remember when he went on that stupid Costas show, the townhall meeting where he yammered on and on about deadspin username 'ballsdeep' (which was funny in itself)??

I want to take that and paste over his suit with his ridic gucci leather clothes, and just have goodbye horses playing faintly in the background

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:57 (eleven years ago) link

honestly the most compelling thing about this is the oscillating tone. is he proud? ashamed? aroused? well yes, he's most certainly aroused. but is he contrite? possibly. embarrassed? self-aware? horny? very very horny. yes. insatiably horny. buzz.

open the blood gates (elmo argonaut), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:57 (eleven years ago) link

he's virile MUTHAFUCKAS

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:57 (eleven years ago) link

LEATHERY AND VIRILE

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:57 (eleven years ago) link

towards the start he writes something like "i'm writing this so i can maybe force this habit into remission and help others who have the same problem" and by the end he's all "you know what, fuck it, this is who i am, i'ma do me" *hair flips*

open the blood gates (elmo argonaut), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 20:59 (eleven years ago) link

some of these have been posted but here you go for future reference: http://philadelphia.cbslocal.com/2012/11/07/buzzs-outfits/#photo-1

call all destroyer, Tuesday, 26 March 2013 21:00 (eleven years ago) link

NO TEA NO SHADE BITCHES. BUZZ OUT

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 21:00 (eleven years ago) link

getting kenan vibes

― Heyman (crüt), Tuesday, March 26, 2013 3:44 PM (12 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

man i didn't want to say anything but

congratulations (n/a), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 21:01 (eleven years ago) link

just a guy getting in touch with himself

max, Tuesday, 26 March 2013 21:01 (eleven years ago) link

at sex clubs in macau

max, Tuesday, 26 March 2013 21:01 (eleven years ago) link

his wife mustve been psyched to see an article that simultaneously calls her a slut AND frigid

max, Tuesday, 26 March 2013 21:02 (eleven years ago) link

I bought dozens of stretch jeans and leather leggings and leather pants that sculpted my lower body the way I wanted, with no room for speculation.

dear lord

the pheromones of hot clothing (DJP), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 21:03 (eleven years ago) link

I stand in front of the three-way mirror wearing a mock-up and am fastidiously measured by one of Gucci's finest experts on tailoring. A second person assists him. Both of them step back for perspective. This is why Italians should run the world.

what does this mean

open the blood gates (elmo argonaut), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 21:05 (eleven years ago) link

italians should run the world, because tailors

open the blood gates (elmo argonaut), Tuesday, 26 March 2013 21:05 (eleven years ago) link


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