I am thoroughly frustrated with the ongoing scheduling conflict for my grandchildren's birthdays. I was lucky enough to have one grandson born on the 20th of September (age 9) and a granddaughter born on the 18th of September (age 2). I have two sons, one has the two girls and the other has the two boys). In addition another grandson was born on the same day as my other granddaughter - January 14th (one is 17 and one is 6). To me this was a blessing as the grandchildren are in Salt Lake City, Utah and I am in Tucson, Arizona. I go back to SLC for all of their birthdays and have done this for the last 6 years.
This year our youngest son with the two girls, ages 2 and 6 was recently divorced. His wife left the marriage of 11 years and the 6-year old girls is struggling. The two year old's birthday is coming up on the 18th as is the 9 year old boy's on the 20th. Instead of working together - even though our younger son calls to try to work out a schedule - our oldest son and his wife have scheduled their son's party at the same time. I am tired of choosing where I am going and how to handle this. I have not heard a thing about the 9 year olds' party so I have told my younger son I will help him with the 2-year olds' party. I cannot be in two places at once and my daughter-in-law (oldest son's wife) tells the 9 year old I would rather be at the other party - this has happen in the past.
How do I handle this - I do not know what to do - my grandchildren are very important to me. I do not want them to think I am favoring one or the other. The "daughter-in-law" seems to try to cause conflict in our family and I have tried to ignore it - I am staying at their house this time (I take turns going back and forth when I visit). HELP - Grandma
― Frances Terrill, Wednesday, 15 September 2010 22:07 (fifteen years ago)