We're creating a virtual manager for our band

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The idea is that when it comes to long-range business propositions, we'll say 'speak to our manager'. We then provide an email address to a fictitious, hard-nosed manager which is in fact us. Then we talk business through this tough character.

What should we call him/her? Here's some names we came up with(googleproof all your suggestions somehow so we don't get caught out later on)

* Vinni G0lding
* Harvey Weintr@ub
* Lis@ Schrecker
* Kesselworth Ruschetsky
* Preston Q. Sch1ffelbein

All suggestions gratefully received.


ratty, Saturday, 14 January 2006 04:05 (nineteen years ago)

b1ll barr0w

jim p. irrelevant (electricsound), Saturday, 14 January 2006 05:29 (nineteen years ago)

Gr4nt Pet3rs

Redd Harvest (Ken L), Saturday, 14 January 2006 06:02 (nineteen years ago)

Lis@ Schrecker is great -- a hard-nosed Aryan chick ain't nothin' to mess with.

NoTimeBeforeTime (Barry Bruner), Saturday, 14 January 2006 06:42 (nineteen years ago)

Yeah, that's a good one. The name kind of says "don't fuck me about".

Pashmina (Pashmina), Saturday, 14 January 2006 12:09 (nineteen years ago)

petr3 wass3rmann

ken c (ken c), Saturday, 14 January 2006 12:22 (nineteen years ago)

I second Lis@ Schreck$r

joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Saturday, 14 January 2006 23:13 (nineteen years ago)

Biff Tannen

A BOLD QUAHOG (ex machina), Sunday, 15 January 2006 00:24 (nineteen years ago)

J0hn Hard1ng (subtle use of the word hard)
Amy S1lverstein (at the risk of sounding anti semitic, people take Jewish managers seriously)
D0n Butte (references D0n Arden, plus character-building surname)

Matt #2 (Matt #2), Sunday, 15 January 2006 02:23 (nineteen years ago)

W.F. Stant0n

Use of middle initial in name = level one fancy (i.e. Ulysses S. Grant)
Use of first initial in name = level two fancy (i.e. F. Murray Abraham)
Use of both first and middle initials = level 3, maximum name sophistication

Guitar Phase (Matt Chesnut), Sunday, 15 January 2006 07:31 (nineteen years ago)

What happens if they ask for a phone number?

gbx (skowly), Sunday, 15 January 2006 21:00 (nineteen years ago)

huh. You've got me there. I guess we have to provide Lis@ Schr*cker's number. And very quickly, we will be undone. Hmmm, let me think about that. Any suggestions??

One thing is clear though - Lis@ Schr*ecker is the name, by popular consent.

ratty, Monday, 16 January 2006 01:14 (nineteen years ago)

I think you'd also better have a good disguise ready, and have a plan to avoid wacky hijinx when "Lisa" has to meet industry people at one of your band's shows -- quick costume changes ensue!

Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Monday, 16 January 2006 03:27 (nineteen years ago)

Maybe it would work BETTER for Lisa to be unable to attend shows. After all, the industry people are probably going to want to install their own sinister, corporate replacement who will do their bidding. How convenient that the band and their original manager have recently had an unfortunate falling-out over the latter's shady dealings with Neo-Nazi organizations....

Doctor Casino (Doctor Casino), Monday, 16 January 2006 03:56 (nineteen years ago)

I assume you're half-joking, but in all seriousness, I think for your purposes actually knowing about the music business will go much farther than having a fake manager. I mean it'd be better to have a drummer who knows more than industry-folk expect than a "manager" who knows less.

Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Monday, 16 January 2006 04:28 (nineteen years ago)

I am half-joking of course. I have a certain amount of expertise, fortunately, but not as much as the fictitious Lis@ Schrecker. Like many musicians I'm not hard-nosed enough. Perhaps, in future, I will ask myself, 'What would Lisa Schrecker do?' That might allow me to get into the mood to talk turkey. Perhaps I should also dress the part.

ratty, Monday, 16 January 2006 04:59 (nineteen years ago)

I just noticed that Michael Jackson's publicist is named Raymone K. Bain. That feels so fake! The first name sounds like Michael's trademark "shamoan" and the rest like a pun on Cobain.

joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 07:23 (nineteen years ago)

despite reading and re-reading this thread, i still dont understand why you need to create a person to handle your business affairs. i find it more impressive when bands have their shit together and dont require a manager.

maria tessa sciarrino (theoreticalgirl), Wednesday, 18 January 2006 20:19 (nineteen years ago)

Exactly. And nothing would be more UNimpressive, I'd think, than having a "manager" who seems somewhat less than competent for a person calling herself a manager.

Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Thursday, 19 January 2006 02:08 (nineteen years ago)

Well I don't know about that, I think whether this issue is important or not relates to whether there you get pleasure out of a light-hearted thread like this one or not. On the other hand, the idea of a power name in business is an interesting topic in its own right.

Winterman and Goldstein manage The Vines, among others. Is there a Winterman, or a Goldstein? I understand that there is not: both characters are ficitious.

Of course, if you have a power name company like Winterman & Goldstein, or, say, Lisa Schr&cker Management, you would still need business skills as an artist. That would be a given. The point of the power name would be to deter people after a freebie.

ratty, Thursday, 19 January 2006 05:50 (nineteen years ago)

W.T.F C0ck3nd

the kit! (g-kit), Thursday, 19 January 2006 10:43 (nineteen years ago)

Of course, if you have a power name company like Winterman & Goldstein, or, say, Lisa Schr&cker Management, you would still need business skills as an artist. That would be a given. The point of the power name would be to deter people after a freebie.

sure, i agree with this. but you dont need to create a fictional character to maintain the guise of business skills. just have them, fer chrissake. if people are going to take advantage of you, they'll do it regardless of whether you have a "manager" or not. the point is not to let it happen in the first place.

as for whether i "get" this thread or not, let's face it: the main joke of this thread is not that funny.

On the other hand, the idea of a power name in business is an interesting topic in its own right.

how? you're going to have to sell me on this.

maria tessa sciarrino (theoreticalgirl), Thursday, 19 January 2006 15:19 (nineteen years ago)

Don't play dumb. You don't expect me to believe that Maria Tessa Sciarrino is your real name, do you?

Abbadavid Berman (Hurting), Thursday, 19 January 2006 15:49 (nineteen years ago)

thats my story and im sticking to it, pal. HA!

maria tessa sciarrino (theoreticalgirl), Thursday, 19 January 2006 16:42 (nineteen years ago)

I think this thread is funny.

jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 19 January 2006 18:04 (nineteen years ago)

I think the reason you peeps lik Lis@ Schr3cker so much is that it sounds a lot like B0bbi Flekm4n.

Redd Harvest (Ken L), Thursday, 19 January 2006 18:26 (nineteen years ago)

I don't know who that is.

jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 19 January 2006 21:35 (nineteen years ago)

my unpopular beat combo was briefly courted by winterman et al

jim p. irrelevant (electricsound), Thursday, 19 January 2006 22:20 (nineteen years ago)

I don't know who that is.

Fran Drescher's character in This Is Spinal Tap.

Chris F. (servoret), Friday, 20 January 2006 03:09 (nineteen years ago)


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