Ormskirk Spring Festivities

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Although snow covers the ground here in Erewhon, it is time to begin planning the celebration of a new beginning....Spring.
That beautific time of year when growth is renewed.
Easter. Ah, Easter...When Jesus comes out of his hole, sees his shadow, and we have 12 more months of Christianity.
Dash all that...there are plans to be made, parties to plan, legs to be shaved, grebes to fatten, fuckwits to exclude, mothers to hug, dogs to train, wood to be gathered, bobbies to be paid-off, Arabs to kill, all and more before we can have "real fun". It's the end of February, boys and girls, lets get cracking!

The festivity council is open for suggestions.

We are assuming that all contributers understand that REAL human dismemberment may upset the children.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Friday, 28 February 2003 04:40 (twenty-two years ago)

If my pet pig continues to exhibit a blatant disenterest in truffles, there will be ham for all at the ressurection rave.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Friday, 28 February 2003 04:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Excellent! It's the time of year when I make Robin do a "special dance"!

― Matt (Matt), Friday, 28 February 2003 12:46 (twenty-two years ago)

if real human dismemberment is a problem for anyone (including our younger viewers), i suggest we just import a victim from a third-world country.

― hurley (hurley), Friday, 28 February 2003 19:45 (twenty-two years ago)

One where they've got lots of spares? I vote Lichtenstein.

― Matt (Matt), Saturday, 1 March 2003 23:09 (twenty-two years ago)

sorr, we just popped the last lichtensteiner into the gumbo. how about the people's republic of leeds??

― hurley (hurley), Monday, 3 March 2003 15:17 (twenty-two years ago)

I've heard of leeks in gumbo but I didn't know they had a republic.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Tuesday, 4 March 2003 02:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Leeds, man, Leeds. The proud city of my fathers youth. I believe our boy Robin is the one to talk to about Leeds.

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Tuesday, 4 March 2003 16:32 (twenty-two years ago)

He's too busy dancin'

― Matt (Matt), Tuesday, 4 March 2003 16:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Where is this leeding?

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Tuesday, 4 March 2003 16:51 (twenty-two years ago)

if you snapped off the mains for just a minute or so, maybe robin could stop "dancin'" long enuff to fill us in on this leeds business. and if you cared a whit about the carpets you'd have put cotton buds in his ears (and maybe not fed him so much cobcorn).

― hurley (hurley), Tuesday, 4 March 2003 18:07 (twenty-two years ago)

When Robin dances, is he nude?
We could have a "special tent" at the Fair.
We could sell tickets for admission and charge even a higher price for egress.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Tuesday, 4 March 2003 18:45 (twenty-two years ago)

When Robin dances he is wearing a very special costume woven of shimmering lengths of muslin. Robin's dance is very holy, and sombre. Do not exploit his dance for financial gain. Do not mock his dance. Watch the way he points. He points to Leeds.

― Matt (Matt), Wednesday, 5 March 2003 00:42 (twenty-two years ago)

But alas, the muslin comes off in the end, as the late Dame Peggy Ashcroft found out (the hard way)…

― Rex (Rex), Wednesday, 5 March 2003 00:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Ah, well, it was just a thought. Being an American I guess Capitalism is an ingrained trait. I suppose *I* could dance naked and there would be profit to be made from selling blindfolds.

Let's not forget the cotton candy and sauteed grebes.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Wednesday, 5 March 2003 01:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh!

And hovercraft rides!

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Wednesday, 5 March 2003 01:13 (twenty-two years ago)

wasn't that the bit where robin sprang forth, fully formed, from dame peggy's nostril (or perhaps an enlarged pore near the nose -- my slo-mo is broken)?? good stuff.

― hurley (hurley), Wednesday, 5 March 2003 15:22 (twenty-two years ago)

wait, someone mentioned Leeds?

― gareth (gareth), Wednesday, 5 March 2003 18:07 (twenty-two years ago)

i don't think so. i'll have the girl read the transcript back.

― hurley (hurley), Wednesday, 5 March 2003 18:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Ermm,
Easter, human dismemberment, truffles, Robin's "Special Dance", Lichtenstein, leeks, shimmering lengths of muslin, Dame Peggy Ashcroft, candy floss (I'm translating to English), sauteed grebes, and hovercrafts.

Nope. No mention of Leeds. But I'm from Sheffield, so in my opinion Leeds is never worth a mention.

― celeste (Celeste), Wednesday, 5 March 2003 20:30 (twenty-two years ago)

haha, well i'm from bradford so my opinion carries even less weight

hey, is lynskey around here today? i just wanted to say i wasnt holding him to blame either, you misunderstood:( i shall dig out a picture of west lancs from my photos as an apology!

― gareth (gareth), Thursday, 6 March 2003 19:15 (twenty-two years ago)

He's in Leeds

― Matt (Matt), Friday, 7 March 2003 00:29 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm in Leeds.

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Friday, 7 March 2003 00:47 (twenty-two years ago)

"candy floss (I'm translating to English)"
Talking down to the "Yank" are we young lady?
Just for that I am infusing the helium balloons with German beer farts.
There will be no "funny voices" and it will be all your fault.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Friday, 7 March 2003 04:35 (twenty-two years ago)

How dare you! Celeste never talks down to anybody. Except Jim, and Robin, and me....hang on....fucking right, no funny voices and it's all Cel's fault! To the stocks!

― Matt (Matt), Friday, 7 March 2003 12:09 (twenty-two years ago)

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