About Hell

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I just don't understand the big deal about Hell. I've been hearing about "heaven" so long, Hell sounds like Disneyland. I just hope, that when I die, I'll go to Hell. I mean, really, who wants to sit and have tea with a dead Pope all day."No worry?" Where's the fun in THAT? Fuck it. I'm going to Hell. Whose on?

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Thursday, 18 September 2003 23:28 (twenty-two years ago)

I'll only come with you if we can go there in a handcart.

― Wouldn't you like to know (Amused), Friday, 19 September 2003 16:31 (twenty-two years ago)

just as long as I don't have to push

― Weebleman (StillSimon), Friday, 19 September 2003 17:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Where ya been, "Ed."? Seen any of those mythical wombats lately? Could you help me with my contractions? Do you have tan lines? Do you...Oh, no, wait, that's just too private...never mind.

Welcome back.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Saturday, 20 September 2003 00:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Shut up about hell aready.

Hell is not big and it's certainly not clever.

Anyone would think you owned it.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Saturday, 20 September 2003 23:29 (twenty-two years ago)

I do have tan lines!

― Wouldn't you like to know (Amused), Monday, 22 September 2003 07:47 (twenty-two years ago)

the best part of hell by far are the long braided velvet pulls for room service. they're *everywhere* and each one's attached to somebody's glottis. nobody can eat the food, but hey it's on the per diem.

― hurley (hurley), Tuesday, 23 September 2003 23:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Maybe he does own it. I have long believed Zen Clown to be the devil in disguise. At any rate I'm going there and when I get there, I'm shagging Jimi Hendrix.

― Wouldn't you like to know (Amused), Thursday, 25 September 2003 09:44 (twenty-two years ago)

I saw him on fire on the Isle of Wight once . . . strange that.

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Thursday, 25 September 2003 15:22 (twenty-two years ago)

You're Wong. That wasn't me.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Friday, 26 September 2003 01:22 (twenty-two years ago)

That's the worst joke ever made on this forum. Well done.

― Matt (Matt), Friday, 26 September 2003 09:07 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't know about that, perhaps we should start a new thread about the worst jokes ever posted here. I'm sure it would get very long very quickly.

― Wouldn't you like to know (Amused), Friday, 26 September 2003 09:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Alternatively, we could start a thread in which we collectively write a dissertation on the subliminal auto-erotic motivations of the worst jokes ever told on this forum. It wouldn't grow quite as long, quite as fast (please feel free to make use of the straight line) but it would most welcomely give us another chance to rehash the more delectable portions of spam emails about various body parts. As a further bonus, I bet I'd learn another new word or two from Rex.

― Aimless, Friday, 26 September 2003 16:08 (twenty-two years ago)

The proposed list under current discussion might get very long, but it won't be very big around.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Friday, 26 September 2003 23:07 (twenty-two years ago)

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