Bartenders or bartendresses?

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Whom do you prefer and why?

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 26 April 2004 21:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Bartenders exhibit greater bartenderness.

― Aimless (Aimless), Monday, 26 April 2004 22:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Bartendresses generally wear better dresses and I'm not so sure about the tenderness issue.

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 26 April 2004 22:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Political correctness is a bane of humanity.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Monday, 26 April 2004 23:23 (twenty-one years ago)

...just as wolfbane is the bane of wolves.

― Aimless (Aimless), Tuesday, 27 April 2004 02:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Get a wench behind the bar every time.

regards,

REB

― Rik E Boy (Rik E Boy), Tuesday, 27 April 2004 05:24 (twenty-one years ago)

I have a wrench behind the bar at work. It's for changing gas bottles.

― Matt (Matt), Tuesday, 27 April 2004 12:37 (twenty-one years ago)

What do change them into?

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 27 April 2004 16:38 (twenty-one years ago)

other gas bottles

― Matt (Matt), Tuesday, 27 April 2004 21:56 (twenty-one years ago)

That's, like, magic. Transubstantiation, but in a good way.

― Michael White (Hereward), Wednesday, 28 April 2004 15:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Can you turn water into wine?

― Michael White (Hereward), Wednesday, 28 April 2004 21:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Not only that he can charge £18 for it...

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 28 April 2004 21:14 (twenty-one years ago)

That's a wee bit dear for me. I'll have another, lass.

― Michael White (Hereward), Wednesday, 28 April 2004 21:23 (twenty-one years ago)

get out of my restaurant, prole

― Matt (Matt), Wednesday, 28 April 2004 23:44 (twenty-one years ago)

*Grumbles and shuffles out* "Fancy shmancy swine."

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 29 April 2004 14:26 (twenty-one years ago)

I can turn wine into water, but there doesn't seem to be much of a commercial need for this.

― C J (C J), Friday, 30 April 2004 14:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Much the same applies to my talent of turning water into swine.

― Aimless (Aimless), Friday, 30 April 2004 15:20 (twenty-one years ago)

"It is illegal to make liquor in private and water in public."

Can't remember who said that but it sounds like the voice of experience.

Aqua Pigs!? Sounds like something out of Miami Vice.

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 30 April 2004 15:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Aqua Pigs sounds like a brilliant television series based around the everyday lives of sloshy water-filled farm animals. They'd be like those water-snake toys, those slippery tubes which you can't hold onto because they keep sliding out of your hand, but made in the likeness of Pinky and Perky. Mercifully though they would be unable to speak.

I think there's some mileage in this idea, it just needs someone with clever marketing skills.

― C J (C J), Friday, 30 April 2004 16:13 (twenty-one years ago)

"Aqua Pig Powers! Activate!

Form of... an ice dildo.

Form of... a snuffleupagus."

I think the drugs are beginning to wear off

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 30 April 2004 17:52 (twenty-one years ago)

CJ,

Although there seems to be a lack of commercial need for your wine/water trick.......

I have a grand idea!

If one were to make a video of you performing this simple (for you) task then we were to upload it to a web page and charge for the privlige of downloading and watching......

Oh well, I can dream can't I ???? :)

― Ðµdë §téè£, Friday, 30 April 2004 21:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Bloody cheese smuggler!

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 30 April 2004 21:44 (twenty-one years ago)

I hate when I post while sober, re-reading it now that makes no sense at all..... sorry CJ :(

BTW

Michael White, if the cheese is bloody then you are obviously trying to smuggle too much at once!

― Ðµdë §téè£, Saturday, 1 May 2004 02:31 (twenty-one years ago)

That sounds very much like the voice of experience.

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 3 May 2004 13:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I once brought a huge slab of Brie - the size of a cartwheel - back from the Mamouth hypermarket in Calais. It was a hot day and by the time we got home the cheese had melted, oozed out of its wooden packaging, and moulded itself perfectly to the shape of the boot of my car. It took weeks to chip it all out, and I never did get rid of the smell.

This hasn't got anything to do with cheese smuggling as such, it's just the only cheese story I have. I don't get out much.

― C J (C J), Monday, 3 May 2004 18:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I think there's some mileage in this idea, it just needs someone with clever marketing skills.

Market it to the heroin/oxycontin niche?

the size of a cartwheel

A small pond of cheese. You should have had a fondue tailgate party, but you should have used Caerphilly.

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 3 May 2004 20:53 (twenty-one years ago)

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