Role Call

Heah sah.

Yo.

(Is this thread, then, to be no more than a monosyllabic bleating? I fear it shall be so. I do.)

If pronounced correctly, my post contains three syllabubs.

Well...

I expected more people but if there aren't, you know what that means...

SECONDS ON THE CHOW LINE!!

Adsum

Er, sorry, seem to have nodded off just for a moment there, dear oh dear, did someone ask a question?

No, no, Rex. You were having a bad dream. You just go back to sleep. I'll help you be more comfortable. Here...Let's get those boots off and...*takes a breath and passes out*

Here, but I have a question.

Do I need to reply for each of my identities?

Your identities? You mean Satan, Lucifer, Ahrimanes, Belial, Sammael, Zamiel, Beelzebub, Mephistopheles, Adaddon, Apollyon or Mammon?

Naw. "еdë §téè£" will be fine. This is a simple roll call. We don't need to frighten the children.

pooey

I'm here!

I have just returned from a jolly holiday sur le continent, which was very nice except I now have an ear infection from having spent too long frollicking in the sea. My ear really hurts so please don't start any shouting or rowdy behaviour. Thank you.

Welcome home CJ!

As for your ear mix up a solution of very warm water and hydrogen peroxide... about 50-50 mix.

It may sting a little with it being infected and it certainly will sound like rice crispys inside your head but that will clean out all of those annoying nastys that have taken up residence in your ear. A baby nose sucking syringe works the best. Just dribble it in and let it work.

I have had several bouts with swimmers ear in the past and this will clear it up.

I concur.

Zen,

If you have a canker, then might I suggest a polticeto be applied to the affected area.

To make the poltice you will need:

1 pound fresh raw pork chitterlings ground fine

7 Tbls dried seaweed

pinch of mustard seed

1 lentil

1 half gallon Jack Daniels Sour Mash

Mix first four ingrediants in a large bowl until everything is completely incorporated.

Set mixture aside

Drink Jack Daniels Sour Mash until you cannot say Jack Daniels Sour Mash.

Canker ....... what canker??????

CONCUR, Dude, I said CONCUR! Not canker!

I DID, however, follow your advice and drank a quart of "Jack".

Oh...My...God...My head hurts. I think it is because I left out the lentil.

Doctor еdë §téè£, you are amazing. I have been awake nearly all night because the earache was so bad, but first thing this morning I ventured out to the nearest chemist and bought the requisite hydrogen peroxide. It did sting a little - I didn't stop screaming for half an hour - but it's already so much better. Thank you, thank you. I'm even getting my sense of balance back - there's nothing worse than stumbling around drunkenly banging into things when you're not even drunk, is there? I may have to try some of that JD, now. Purely medicinal, you understand. Hic.

Glad that it helped you out CJ. Bad ears can really be a pain in the arse.

Self medication....... perfectly acceptable around these parts!

You know, switching from Mad Dog 20-20 to JD is the first sign of maturity. Awwwww, our little CJ is getting all grown up! :)

Did you get the rice crispys effect? or was all you could hear is pain?

When I do my ears it sounds like you stuffed "pop rocks" into my ear then filled it up with Mountain Dew. Which I have tried before and it DOES NOT work as well as the H2O2. Just makes a sticky mess that really freaks out the other drivers.

Hope ya get to feeling better soon.

hey boo!

Still alive. Posting activities may resume once I have put all our possessions into boxes, moved them about 40 miles, then taken them all out of the boxes again. The thought of just leaving everything has crossed my mind several times.

I now know why my parents have never moved house. We started this foolhardy escapade in November. We're hoping to finally be in our new house at the end of next week. But those wonderful beasts called solicitors are still refusing to tell us a completion date.

As for the rest of the Ormskirk Clan, well I think I packed Lynskey away in a box last week. The others are around somewhere. Robins box has an address label on it for "The Other Side of the World". Jarlmai's box is to follow us along in a few months time. We'll be leaving Matt behind though, along with the fridge and cooker. I'm sure the new owners will find a use for him.

Glad to see everyone else is alive and well if a bit worse for wear from the JD and dodgy ears. Much sympathy there, horrible affliction.

there?? where??

Celeste?????

Can it be true?

And just when all hope was nearly lost?

But I do hope that you nailed down Porl's box securely?

Re: Lynskey's box.

I hope you have used sufficient bonds to keep him in there.

God only knows what whould happen if he got loose.

Weebleman: Yes, I'm still around. I know you'll ask, so I'll promise here to get the rest of the old AAD archives properly sorted "after the move" (along with everything else that I'm doing during that hazy undetermind period.)

Zen: Lynskey's box is secure. Plenty of gaffer tape, so he can't escape before the move. As for the mayhem that may occur after our arrival in Stalybridge... well we'll see.

Oh yes. The new and improved Daymaker Grange will be in Sunny Stalybridge. Known to the locals as "The Bridge" and the trendy visitors as "StalyVegas".

If there is anything in this world more beautiful than Celeste, I am not aware of it.

and as a frame for her, Stalybridge looks charming.

I particularly like the canal, which is something Ormskirk seemed to lack

I've just got back from building one, as it happens. I'll show them, with their pub with a long name and their high flying semi-pro footie team *grumble*

Pub with the longest name AND pub with the shortest name.

Stalybridge has many things Ormskirk doesn't. A canal and a river, hills, people with accents which don't send shudders down the spine.
I think though I'm most looking forward to being able to look out of my window onto open moorland rather than other peoples houses.

I'm glad you all approve of Stalybridge. Here's hoping it lives up to expectations.

Celeste.

I Hope Stalybridge does not dissapoint you. If it does, I may just have to come over there and kick it's butt. I can't walk very good but I have a very hefty cane. I am very dangerous. Give Porl a kiss for me. Just a brotherly peck on the cheek. Nothing serious. I am easily embarresed.

BTW: If you see Matt? Give him a swift kick in the ass.

Marty

Oh. Weebles? You WILL hold my coat won't you? I'm counting on you son.

(One of the advantages of advanced age is that one can go around saying "son" and "lad" and "dear" and "darling" without much fear of getting slapped.)

of course I will Zen ( even though that was in another country).

Celeste- Is it just me or does the reference to open moorland remind anyone else of the latest crime scene? Isn't that where they bury the dead grebes?

I belive for every grebe that falls...A flower grows.

Where is Michael White?

MICHAEL? SHOW YOURSELF!

No, no. don't show EVERYTHING!

Jeeze. Sorry I asked.

Sorry, I was napping. Did someone say something about a G&T? Yes, thank you, I will have one. Now, what were we on about....?

"Now, what were we on about....?"

Michael, I wish you would pay attention.

Celeste and Porl have bought a house with a wonderful view of the countryside.

Celeste is a goddess who has apparantly offended a higher god and has been condemed to exist as a human and live with a beast.

The beast, Porl, has other identities because he is involved with an international crime syndicate that provides farm animals for illicit activities.

I really don't know these people but I think if I ever get to Stalybridge, they will have a cage in the cellar for me to stay in.

Unfortunatly we won't have a cellar, I really really wanted one, it would have made a great place for Porl (As a studio you understand, not that I'd be locking him in there when he annoyed me... honestly.) But we've learnt that hunting for houses involves lots of compromises (small house in a nice area? or large house in an inner city slum? Hmm... let me think about that...)
However there will always be a corner, or a sofa for you to stay my dear Clown. Or you could just turf Jarlmai out of his room and stay in that... whichever you deem as the safest option.

The crime syndicate should do well though all the moorland across the road will come in very useful.

I might consider sleeping WITH Jim if, of course, he were properly restrained and sedated.

England, however, is a long way away from me and since it seems that you do not have a suitable cage...I'll probably stay home.

I hope the move is going well, Celeste - I don't envy you that at all. Stalybridge looks gorgeous though, so it'll all be worth it in the end.

Oh. Er. Yes. Sorry. Things are so wintry over here in Cape Brrrrreton that it's a constant battle to chip the ice that's formed on the ice on the keyboard. But I made it. Only six months late. I promise to visit a thread based in 2005 in the next six months. Tell me, though, how is that nice young man Owen Oyston keeping these days?

Delightful to see you old bean. I can't speak for Mr Oyston but I'm sure you're as excited as we are abou the European football championships and Big Brother's decision to "get nasty" this summer.

Hello Pooster. A cursory check of the AAD archives shows you to be a hoary headed, venerable grandee. I doff my ridiculously large, feathered hat to you with a flourish and await another pearl of temulent wisdom sometime over the next 6 months.

Pay no attention to Michael, Poo. He's a Yank and we all know how wormy those people are.

Zen,

Even though the "W" and the "Y" are both on the same row their use is not interchangeable..... have a drink and try again.

You mean he's a yormy Wank?

Michael? I think this man just insulted wou.

I don't feel as insulted as you should. Anyway, what does 'yormw' mean?

Damned if I know. I am a blithering idiot.

Or is it blathering.

Damn! This oral communication system confuses the hell out of me...

Martian is so much more succint. I don't grok any of this.

Oh Zen, can you 'c'?

Zen hasn't 'c'een one since August 23rd of 1998..... or so the rumor going around says he hasn't.

Dude saw one once.

It was frightened so badly, it ran off into the woods and hasn't been ceen cince.