A question about egg nog.

I have just gone through a quart of the stuff. Of course I embellished it's already marvelous flavour with a strong helping of Canadian Mist whiskey.

I love eggs. I try not to think about where they come from.

(You KNOW where they come from, shithead.)

Yes I do and that's why I cook them 'well done', just to know that they are dead.

(You are disgusting.)

Oh my.

I hereby apologize to any eggs, chickens or cows I may have offended in my previous posts. I am quite drunk. I realize that's no excuse but the captain of the Titanic was supposedly sober and damaged a perfectly good iceberg.

In fact...I'm begining to formulate a theory...

SOBER PEOPLE ARE DANGEROUS!!

I stay drunk most of the time. I avoid danger. I eat my food with my hands as knives and forks scare the hell out of me. Seriously...what if you were really really drunk and were eating with a fork and thought:"I wonder what would happen if I jammed this fork into my left eye?".

Ineberation has it's dangers, sure, but sober people have caused far more harm in this world than drunks.

Here is some advice for any young drunks reading this: Keep your toilet clean. Puking into a dirty toilet compounds the situation.

And for those of you who smoke the weed? Remember...Never eat more than you can lift.

I once pursued the idiotic notion that I could make nog from penguin's eggs.
What a fool I was.
Have you ever tried to sneak up on a penguin? They stare at you with that smug look whilst shifting that egg from foot to another while YOU fall on your ass trying to avoid sliding into the cold sea and the jaws of a killer whale who has never seen television and may have a taste for human flesh.

Orcas...They should all be shot. Antelopes too. If you have ever been mowing your grass with a rotary lawnmower and encountered a pile of antelope shit and before you knew what was happening, spewed it in the faces of your wife and children, you'd hate them too.

Jeez, I had to sleep on the couch for a week over that deal.

I wonder if grebe eggs would make a good nog.

*sigh* Since I am out of egg nog and left with only whisky, I'll just have to drink the whisky and pretend it's noged.

Hey, I was just kidding in the previous post. I don't have a wife.
I WAS serious about the whiskey and the penguins though.

I like a man who's confident enough to admit he's serious about whiskey and penguins. It shows character, though from what I gather, Zen has never been shy about showing his character.

Is nogging the addition of eggs? I always thought it resulted in a race towards the egg (assuming of course we are only talking about vanila nogging).

I used to think naugahide was made from dried egg nog. That was when I drank my absinthe straight.

No...Silly...

Naugahide comes from the wild nauga, now a protected species, which explains why our modern day kitchen chairs are covered with dried egg nog.

As I pondered your original post I kept wondering to myself "what is going thru his head...... what kind of sickness resides inside his noggin...." and such as that.

Then it hit me, noggin... eggnog... noggin... eggnog... Nog... Gin.... Egg.... Nog.....

Noggin is another word for the head.

People have been known to put Gin in Eggnog.

EggNogGin.... Egg head (a smart person) with Gin

Drinking Gin makes you smarter than you were before!

But then there is Zen, I guess he is the exception that proves the rule?

I am a drunken idiot.

Dude, however is realativly intelligent and sober most of the time. (I would say that he is handsome but although I am drunk and idiotic, I am not a liar.)

His previous post made, to me, no sense whatsoever. It's probably my fault...I need to be drunker.

Maybe you need to give up the banana daiquiri's?

Could you request a prescription for a nut based drink?

Just walk right up to him and ask......

"How about a hickory daiquiri Doc?"

That's a horse of a different cruller. He prefers scones.