Genetically Engineering Meat Sacks on Pets so as They may Sustain Us

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

In a nutshell, we genetically engineer cats, dogs and other typical household pets so they grow large sacks of meat somewhere on their torsos. These sacks have no nerves attatched and so their removal is painless. The meat these sacks produce is different from the animal itself so therefore kitty or rover could sustain themselves from the flesh as well as his dutiful master.

These meat creatures will fulfil the role of both the pet and the sunday roast for the average family, however expensive.

Once armed with the financial clout that these lunchballs will have made us in retail we can once again resume our glorious plan of building a rocket so big and dangerous that it can destroy our sun.

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Sunday, 5 January 2003 20:04 (twenty-two years ago)

What colour is the sky over your world?

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Monday, 6 January 2003 04:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Blood red

― Weebleman (StillSimon), Monday, 6 January 2003 23:12 (twenty-two years ago)

What's a sky?

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Tuesday, 7 January 2003 15:23 (twenty-two years ago)

How much meat from a gerbil's sack?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 8 January 2003 10:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Enough to feed the gerbil and a small baby. Maybe gerbils could produce some sort of paste that babies found agreeable. Apple and Parsnip.

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Wednesday, 8 January 2003 15:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Do fat people have pet elephants?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 8 January 2003 15:47 (twenty-two years ago)

hahahahaah fat people hahahahha elephants hahahhaha you see hahaha thats funny cos hahahah elephants are big and haaahahaa so are fat people.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Wednesday, 8 January 2003 16:26 (twenty-two years ago)

Not as funny as the crossbreed

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Wednesday, 8 January 2003 16:28 (twenty-two years ago)

And not as cross

― Weebleman (StillSimon), Thursday, 9 January 2003 22:28 (twenty-two years ago)

And not as well bred.

― Zen Clown (Zen Clown), Friday, 10 January 2003 06:37 (twenty-two years ago)

What about bread sacks?

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Friday, 10 January 2003 12:20 (twenty-two years ago)

On iwantoneofthose.com you can buy a HOT BEAR who has a heating 'wheat sack' inside him. Our invention has already been invented!

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Friday, 10 January 2003 12:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Hey! Hands off my patent, Southall!

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Friday, 10 January 2003 13:11 (twenty-two years ago)

"In a nutshell, we genetically engineer cats, dogs and other typical household pets........"

Surely it would be better to do away with the restrictive nutshell? Unless it was a really big, genetically engineered nutshell, of course. Big enough to live in.

Hey, (ding!) why don't we grow houses out of nutshells?

― Pete Andrews, Friday, 10 January 2003 15:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Sorry Lynskey!

― Nick Southall (Nick Southall), Friday, 10 January 2003 15:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Well I'm not! Not sorry at all.
It'll be a cold day in Hull before you get an apology out of me, I can tell you.

― Pete Andrews, Friday, 10 January 2003 15:59 (twenty-two years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.