FUCK
― don’t bore us, get to the aeon of horus (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 9 September 2019 16:57 (five years ago) link
clearly a Virgo
― brigadier pudding (DJP), Monday, 9 September 2019 16:58 (five years ago) link
"it appears your dick is in retrograde"
― FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Monday, 9 September 2019 16:59 (five years ago) link
for the record, a Scorpio -- born w/mercury retrograde actually!
― sarahell, Monday, 9 September 2019 16:59 (five years ago) link
look it’s just a bit cold okay and anyway this is a bad angle xp
― don’t bore us, get to the aeon of horus (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 9 September 2019 16:59 (five years ago) link
Texas, ever at the forefront of progressive legislation, has criminalized unsolicited dick pics!
https://jezebel.com/it-is-now-illegal-to-send-an-unsolicited-dick-pic-in-te-1837802763
― fremmes with neppavenettes (rip van wanko), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:00 (five years ago) link
I had a few friends that were in a burlesque troupe which of course attracted some undesirable elements. So they got quite a few dick pics.
So they would doxx the dudes and ask their FB friends to troll the fuckers to death.
You'da thought the dick-transmitters would have been smart enough to spoof their numbers, but...nope.
― FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:01 (five years ago) link
They should be illegal!
all my sexts were sent in texas/ that’s why i hang my dong in tennessee
― don’t bore us, get to the aeon of horus (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:01 (five years ago) link
Xxpost
― FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:02 (five years ago) link
what I want to know actually -- is do dudes take a new picture of their dick prior to sending, or do they have a pre-curated dick pic portfolio?
― sarahell, Monday, 9 September 2019 17:02 (five years ago) link
it's called "dickollage"
― brigadier pudding (DJP), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:03 (five years ago) link
was it over or under 6" that should tell you
― fremmes with neppavenettes (rip van wanko), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:04 (five years ago) link
Much in the way that you see an actor's headshot and think "man, you don't look like this anymore.."
― FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:04 (five years ago) link
it isn't like the dude held a tape measure up to it ... I have no idea!
― sarahell, Monday, 9 September 2019 17:05 (five years ago) link
now I'm tempted to post Nick Offerman's old headshot to the thread as it's thematically appropriate
― brigadier pudding (DJP), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:05 (five years ago) link
Xxpost maybe he used the metric system too cmon now
― FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:07 (five years ago) link
Xpost lol i just looked it up and...yeah
the previously existing "critique my dick pic" tumblr leads me to believe that there could be definite reuse of pictures. if you make the effort to craft a good photo, why not get some mileage out of it?
otoh maybe it's more like learning the rules of good photography and once you've learned the correct lighting and angles, the mise en scène, you can just manufacture good pics on demand
― untuned mass damper (mh), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:26 (five years ago) link
idk, maybe it's like having a bad hair day -- sometimes you just aren't going to get a good result atm, so you use a pre-existing pic? Though the context, at least my sense of it is, that it is supposed to be contemporaneous to illustrate the fellow sending it is hard for the recipient?
― sarahell, Monday, 9 September 2019 17:30 (five years ago) link
stock cock photos
― brigadier pudding (DJP), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:35 (five years ago) link
that’s why i always plop my wang next to today’s newspaper
― don’t bore us, get to the aeon of horus (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:35 (five years ago) link
*plop* there it is
― brigadier pudding (DJP), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:36 (five years ago) link
I didn't sleep much last night, sorry everyone
evocative
like the fish market wrapping tomorrow's catch in yesterday's paper
― untuned mass damper (mh), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:37 (five years ago) link
dickollage! lolllllllll
― sarahell, Monday, 9 September 2019 17:37 (five years ago) link
I lolled very hard at this
I would prefer not to take the risk of having preexisting penile portraiture hanging around on my phone for very long tbh
― a wagon to the curious (Noodle Vague), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:44 (five years ago) link
― brigadier pudding (DJP), Monday, September 9, 2019 1:36 PM bookmarkflaglink
Scuse me sonny, you know where I can find some
― FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:44 (five years ago) link
I am now hearing the Blondie song "Hanging on the Telephone" in a new way
― sarahell, Monday, 9 September 2019 17:51 (five years ago) link
also OPP = Original Penile Portraiture
― sarahell, Monday, 9 September 2019 17:54 (five years ago) link
You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dickpics
― brigadier pudding (DJP), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:56 (five years ago) link
the ploppening
― fremmes with neppavenettes (rip van wanko), Monday, 9 September 2019 17:58 (five years ago) link
I gave my love a dick picThat had no bone
― a wagon to the curious (Noodle Vague), Monday, 9 September 2019 18:00 (five years ago) link
You said it belonged to me, made me stop and thinkThen I noticed yours was red, mine was baby pink
― FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Monday, 9 September 2019 18:07 (five years ago) link
he sent dick pics in a feverharder than a pepper sproutwe've been talking about Houstonever since the fire went outbecause unsolicited dick pics are now illegal in the state of Texas
― sarahell, Monday, 9 September 2019 18:08 (five years ago) link
I got a letter from the government the other dayI opened and read itIt was just a dickpic
― FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Monday, 9 September 2019 18:22 (five years ago) link
I find the most disarming response to these texts is usually "where's the rest of it?"
i've found "sorry, wrong number" to also be effective
― sarahell, Monday, 9 September 2019 18:42 (five years ago) link
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LCRZZC-DH7M
― a wagon to the curious (Noodle Vague), Monday, 9 September 2019 18:55 (five years ago) link
You could also try "... DAD????"
― brigadier pudding (DJP), Monday, 9 September 2019 19:14 (five years ago) link
Q: why would anybody do this
― Non stop chantar (crüt), Monday, 9 September 2019 19:19 (five years ago) link
Toxic masculinity?
― FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Monday, 9 September 2019 19:19 (five years ago) link
No ish with consensual sharing, obviously sending unsolicited pics should be illegal everywhere
― a wagon to the curious (Noodle Vague), Monday, 9 September 2019 19:37 (five years ago) link
what if you’ve got a really great hog tho
― don’t bore us, get to the aeon of horus (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 9 September 2019 19:40 (five years ago) link
My girlfriend-at-the-time got one and was really upset by it and actually tried to report it to the police and they were like "we can't arrest a dick" and told her to just "ignore it".
Then she got another one from same dude an hour later. Cops still didn't care. And I had even identified the likely culprit through reverse engineering and background check dbs. Still no dice.
I have no idea what the law is here though.
She blocked the number once she realized how useless law enforcement was.
― FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Monday, 9 September 2019 19:49 (five years ago) link
i think it's one of those things that revolves around the issue of "solicited" -- it's like consent -- does it have to be "consistent and enthusiastic"? Like is it required for someone to explicitly say, "please send me a picture of your penis" or is it acceptable in the course of flirting?
― sarahell, Monday, 9 September 2019 19:53 (five years ago) link
seems like it’s only polite to ask ‘hey luv mind if i send you a pic of me spam javelin’ ahead of time imo
― don’t bore us, get to the aeon of horus (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 9 September 2019 19:58 (five years ago) link
that seemed to be the consensus on this thread at the beginning, but I doubt that is the case now
― sarahell, Monday, 9 September 2019 20:00 (five years ago) link
Even when I sent my naughty pic to my gf, i didn't do it without warning, but that's cos im ugly and i wanted to lower her expectations first
― FUCK YOUR POTATO (Neanderthal), Monday, 9 September 2019 20:03 (five years ago) link
I've only sent dick pics when explicitly solicited. would feel weird to send one unbidden, even in the context of a long-term sexual relationship
― Seany's too Dyche to mention (jim in vancouver), Monday, 9 September 2019 20:28 (five years ago) link