masturbating with your off hand

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

just thinkin baout things

Poll Results

Option	Votes
a nice change of pace	11
classic	6
dud	6
does the baby even know the difference?	3
i have never done it	1

― carne asada, Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:16 (fifteen years ago)

prediction of most clear-cut poll in ILX history.

(I've tried, couldn't get it to work :'( )

― FC Tom Tomsk Club (Merdeyeux), Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:27 (fifteen years ago)

missing option: "use both hands as I need to use my 'on' hand to surf with"

― an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:29 (fifteen years ago)

kind of thought "use both hands as" was going to end differently tbh

― living like the Na'vi will never happen (HI DERE), Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:30 (fifteen years ago)

"one hand on the keyboard, one on the speed control for the vibrator"

― an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:31 (fifteen years ago)

more like "my enormous girth requires it"

― living like the Na'vi will never happen (HI DERE), Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:32 (fifteen years ago)

I've got big hands.

― an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:33 (fifteen years ago)

"my enormous length requires it" (I wish)

― an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:33 (fifteen years ago)

No option for "I'm ambidextrous?"

― Sammo Hungover (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:33 (fifteen years ago)

or "I'm frequently masturbating two people at once"?

― an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:38 (fifteen years ago)

*makes self scarce*

― Do the english boil pizza? (acoleuthic), Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:39 (fifteen years ago)

haha i was about to post "i was manually stimulated in turn by the girl i pulled and a boy who was also in the room....."

― velko, Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:41 (fifteen years ago)

The next time someone uses the phrase "off hand comment" I'll think of this thread.

― an executive by day and a wild man by night (snoball), Thursday, 14 January 2010 19:43 (fifteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

― System, Tuesday, 19 January 2010 00:01 (fifteen years ago)

grandma grandma
use
your
left
hand
feels
like someone else.
feels
like someone else.

― Joint Custody (ian), Tuesday, 19 January 2010 02:41 (fifteen years ago)

haha i was about to post "i was manually stimulated in turn by the girl i pulled and a boy who was also in the room....."

― velko, Thursday, January 14, 2010 2:41 PM

*fears being struck by another's jet*

― ♖♕♖ (am0n), Tuesday, 19 January 2010 03:06 (fifteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

― System, Wednesday, 20 January 2010 00:01 (fifteen years ago)

Keeping things fresh is a key component to a long lasting relationship

― carne asada, Wednesday, 20 January 2010 00:15 (fifteen years ago)

off hand might get tired faster, it's out of shape

― harbl, Wednesday, 20 January 2010 00:32 (fifteen years ago)

i have never done it 1

Please for the love of god, just live a little!

― Joint Custody (ian), Wednesday, 20 January 2010 06:44 (fifteen years ago)

yeah, not even possible
it would be like The Whitest Kids You Know - Slow Jerk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1C400obR_g

― CaptainLorax, Wednesday, 20 January 2010 07:33 (fifteen years ago)

not gonna watch that video sorry dude.

― Joint Custody (ian), Wednesday, 20 January 2010 08:02 (fifteen years ago)

it's very funny and you are already in tmi.. i'm sure you've seen much worse

― CaptainLorax, Wednesday, 20 January 2010 08:23 (fifteen years ago)

holy fukstix how long do i have to put up with this shit b4 i just go get a sexchange so i can actually be the pivot girl whose ambidextrious hands actually get her sumwhere in Life,...

― conawaaaysniper, Wednesday, 20 January 2010 11:30 (fifteen years ago)

one month passes...

so i burned the shit out of my right index finger tonight & had to get it wrapped up at the hospital, and i would be lying if i said that this thread didn't enter my mind rather quickly

― Yo cassidy is so hot. He blowin up really big. His freestyles are si (J0rdan S.), Thursday, 25 February 2010 05:53 (fifteen years ago)

Hang on, you burned the shit out of your hand while masturbating? A friction burn?

― might seem normal but is actually (snoball), Thursday, 25 February 2010 11:13 (fifteen years ago)

may have been trying the 'spicy' diet from this thread

Do carnivore, vegetarian, and vegan semen taste different from each other?

― Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ (dyao), Thursday, 25 February 2010 11:15 (fifteen years ago)

I started using my off hand enough that now my dominant hand is my off hand

― We jus' havin' fun, so don't act like you don't want my money, hon (EDB), Friday, 26 February 2010 16:30 (fifteen years ago)

I wank left-handed even tho I am right-handed in all other pursuits.

― I'm so 3000-and-8080 (The Reverend), Friday, 26 February 2010 17:06 (fifteen years ago)

it's nice to switch up but I can never get a full head of steam going

― Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ (dyao), Friday, 26 February 2010 17:07 (fifteen years ago)

not sure if you want a full head of steam going with either hand tbh

― hard out here for a shrimp (J0rdan S.), Friday, 26 February 2010 19:47 (fifteen years ago)

I think I've tried switching off before, but I can't remember the degree of success. Anyway I'm set in my ways now. I don't feel the need to keep my solitary sex life spicy or anything.

"Ten Ways To Heat Up Your Morning Shower!"

No thank you.

― moisture is the essence of wetness (kenan), Saturday, 27 February 2010 11:12 (fifteen years ago)

btw, the video Lorax posted above is actually very funny. It's true.

― moisture is the essence of wetness (kenan), Saturday, 27 February 2010 11:16 (fifteen years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.