what happens when perfection becomes the norm????

eating

if I removed shitting I would never have an opportunity to post to ILX

so wait, if you choose to eliminate eating from your life, you remove both eating AND shitting, right?

or do you continue to shit food that you didn't eat.

yah in this well thought thru & totally logically scenario u still produce waste 4 sum reason. u just dont have 2 eat/be hungry

sleeping

your question would be more explicable in english xp

i would prefer not to sleep

if i chose eating or voiding i would be perpetually troubled over where the food goes or where the poop comes from, respoectively

I'm imagining a futuristic 'beam the poo out of the body'. Assuming nothing goes wrong with that, I vote shitting. I've never injured myself sleeping or eating.

In fact, I'd be happy to do more of those, but I've never thought to myself, It'd be great if I could shit more.

sleeping- would have 7-8 hrs a day more time at the best of times, and it wouldn't torment me to be without it for days on end at the worst of times.

impossible choice, all three are highlights of my day

shitting is shit

I thought about sleeping but I realize I really like having to separate the ennui. better to have never been born at all etc. etc.

Sleeping, because removing it frees up the most time.

impossible choice, all three are highlights of my day

― caek, Friday, February 26, 2010 4:50 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark

For real though - shitting. The other two rank too high on my nonexistent list of life's most pleasurable activities to get rid of.

The same for me. Eating and sleeping are great fun, shitting is okay, but I could easily live without it.

sleeping isn't great fun, you don't even know when you're doing it! it's wasted time, and if you could remove the need for it then i wouldn't miss it one bit.

http://wallscometumblingdown.files.wordpress.com/2008/09/gordon-gekko.jpg

cousin of death tbh

I hardly ever remember my dreams - and when I do they're in black & white without sound - so I have to concur.

(that was supposed to be a xpost to darraghmac, but I agree with NV's point as well to some extent)

I usually remember my dreams and they're great. Sleeping is awesome. You are all crazy.

given an extra 5-8 hrs a night, i could leave aside some time for MUCH better imagination time than my dreams provide tbh

Sleeping for me = I go to bed, fall asleep, wake up eight hours later feeling slightly more tired than when I went to bed. Sleeping sucks.

You're doing it wrong.

(xxpost) If I spent the extra eight hours playing Pong, it would still be more entertaining than my dreams.

being awake non-stop forever would suck

if by suck you mean rule then yes

the need for sleep is eradicated under the premise, so no it would certainly rule. imagine the online Pro Evo sessions

pretty hard to imagine what it would be like to not need to sleep.

Imagine being able to post to ILX 24 hours a day!

if there was no sleep everyone would just end up working hours and hours longer, which would be good for people who like their work but terrible for people who don't especially, which is quite a lot of people.

^^^

i don't know how dogs would fill in their days.

I'm in favour of letting sleeping dogs lie tho

in my fantasy it's all free time tbh, including no more time spent with SO

snubbed other

differentiation is important. going to sleep&waking up w/ someone is awesome. dreams are great. can't believe any parent could possibly be anti-sleep.

in all fairness, can't see the snubbéd having too much of a problem with the new proposals either.

Sleeping is awesome, and I like dreaming too. I think I'd go crazy if I'd have to be awake and do something all the time. Often I just want to rest and do absolutely nothing, and when it comes to that sleeping is much more pleasurable than just lying on the bed awake and staring at the ceiling.

I love sleep more than just about anything else on earth except maybe eating. So sorry, shitting, you have got to go.

eating!

as long as i can still shit if i stop eating

like have u considered eating is the one that costs money and interrupts your day a lot of times each day

Food is the only sensual vice I have left. No way in hell I'm giving that up.

eating is probably the purest, most untrammeled joy available to humanity other than being outdoors on a sunny day - it is a pity 'shitting' is an option because I cannot do anything but vote for it

Eating is really nice - it's the only one of the three that I'd consider a pleasure of any sort.

eating is probably the purest, most untrammeled joy available to humanity

Unless you dine chez LJ...

'delicious' is the most profound word imo

Life without sleeping means life without dreaming and life without dreaming would be suicidally intolerable.

Sleeping and eating are both awesome but then I do too much of both (fattey is always late to work) so maybe it would be good to remove the temptation.

If this is a special superpower that only I have then I would totally remove sleep and have my sekrit extra 8 hours a day to laugh at the normals (watch me spend them all playing Text Twist or something instead of taking over the world ;_; ), but if everyone gets this modification then estela otm about just having to work like 18 hours a day, so goodbye shitting instead.

if he doesn't believe it already he is beyond help

shitting serves no artistic, (...) function.

Giant inflatable turd blown from moorings and brings down power line

expelling things from your body is great

No it's repellent and any joy taken from it is banworthy. Dear god, what have I unbecome. Spots

I hope you will not make such bold claims in future, harbl

I agree with Harbl, shitting can totally be enjoyable. It's just that sleeping and eating are even more enjoyable.

if I removed shitting I would never have an opportunity to post to ILX

― Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ (dyao), Friday, February 26, 2010 1:20 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark

I immediately thought of tuomas posting from phone booth jpeg...

Anyone not voting sleeping is 100% totally incomprehensible to me.

Mxtips vgerfie lodsfd.

i dearly wish Spots. had been 100% totally incomprehensible to me.

finnish is such a sexy language xpost

Anyone not voting sleeping is 100% totally incomprehensible to me.

― Gravel Puzzleworth, Friday, 26 February 2010 13:00 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

every moment spent oblivious to this vale of tears is a moment to be treasured

;_;

if you ate better food you'd find something to live for OM NOM NOM NOM

It would be tragic if you used up the extra eight hours a day just to eat and then excrete.

well sir while i defend to the death etc etc

So basically the removal of the need to sleep would require the invention of a combined dining chair/toilet. /me runs to Patent Office...

Imagine being able to post to ILX 24 hours a day!

― might seem normal but is actually (snoball), Friday, February 26, 2010 7:57 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark

you know, as much as I would like to kid myself that I would fill in the extra 8 hours with something productive, I know deep down inside that this is what I'd end up doing anyway

I voted eating cause cooking for yourself all the damn time and worrying about groceries and eating healthy and all that is damn stressful. if you threw in a personal chef you might change my mind.

also if you removed sleep then how would you cap off your drunken nights? laying in bed slowly becoming sober and realizing with great horror just what it is you have dragged home for the night

that's a seriously good point.

Does passing out drunk count as sleep or being unconcious?

You realize the next day when you look in the mirror that no, it does not really count as sleep.

Voted sleeping. Eating is too much fun, and while shitting isn't my idea of a party or anything, eating without shitting is torture, motherfucker. Gonna sew your asshole closed and keep feedin' you... and feedin' you... and feedin' you...

i was figuring maybe your body could use all the food you eat? instead of "mmm, great, food, energy! oh wait here's half of it back. sorry i er kinda made it gross."

Yeah it's fantasy land anyway, so sure. But I can't think of what else your body would do with whole-kernel corn that's not been chewed properly.

sweat it out

That's gonne be one hell of a zit.

or maybe your body becomes able to digest /everything/ and then you give it off as excess heat

How about a substance that removes unwanted facial and body hair? Never shave again, have some more corn on the cob!

How much fantasy land are we in? Are we adhering to the law of conservation of mass and energy? Because if not, all unused food could turn into nothing. Nothing would be nice.

The Christian Right would come out strongly against this new Nothing, or "No Poo" as some call it, though the already existing community of people who are against using commercial shampoo would object. They'd be a footnote, though. Pat Robertson would say on the 700 Club that No-Pooers are tempted by their new vacant, pristine orifice into unspeakable experimentation with it. He'd be difficult to argue with on this point.

I voted eating cause cooking for yourself all the damn time and worrying about groceries and eating healthy and all that is damn stressful. if you threw in a personal chef you might change my mind.

― Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ (dyao), Friday, February 26, 2010 8:48 AM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

also if you removed sleep then how would you cap off your drunken nights? laying in bed slowly becoming sober and realizing with great horror just what it is you have dragged home for the night

― Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ (dyao), Friday, February 26, 2010 8:52 AM (Yesterday) Bookmark

both of these posts are some real talk

the thing about shitting is that i would honestly read way less -- so many of my hour-plus long reading binges are because i start reading on the toilet & continue once i'm done

and i dont read much to begin with

if i didn't have to sleep i would watch so many movies -- i think it would be kind of great tbh -- as it is right now, so much of my movie watching is thwarted by me falling asleep on the couch/in bed or anticipating falling asleep in the couch/in bed

xp Same reason I wouldn't want to teleport to work.

Maybe that's how the "no shitting" option could work - food is teleported out of your stomach. Leading to a new verbal threat "I'm gonna teleport the shit out of you!"

i was just thinking today what a waste of time shitting is. a bowl of all bran in the morning will minimise the time you spend on the bog 4 real.

yeah i don't spend a long time on poop either, but i still appreciate it

clarifying question on this well thought thru & totally logically scenario: If I choose "eating" does that mean I don't have to eat anymore, you know, to live, but I could still eat for fun if I wanted too?

If so, that's my choice. Because 90% of the time, eating is a big drag. You're puttering along, playing the videogames, reading the books, building the model cars, whatever, and suddenly you have to eat or you die. Every day. Yeah, some people are really into the act of eating and get pleasure out of it, that's cool. But others get more pleasure out of all the activities that must be interrupted in order to feed the demanding belly that is never satisfied. If I didn't have to go shopping for food, prepare food, eat food and clean up after eating, (oh yeah, and LISTEN to people talking about food when they're not shopping for food, preparing food, eating food or cleaning up after food or talking about TALKING about food) I could have learned about 25 other languages by now.

my vague thinking was that u never eat at all just absorb nutrients through osmosis or something. so i guess u basically dont get 2 eat ne more

ppl have broken it down p well i think. eating is the most annoying 2 me just think of all the money u save & the time only real downside is that eating is a social thing the only time i really enjoy it is like long leisurely dinners w/friends wld miss that.

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

You're puttering along, playing the videogames, reading the books, building the model cars, whatever, and suddenly you have to eat or you die

just all of a sudden like that? you got me worried now.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

There's a JG Ballard short story where these dudes have surgery so they don't sleep and they go a bit nuts. Sadly JGB is dead now, so we're not sure if he was ever going to write stories about people who stopped shitting or eating, but it's pretty good reasoning for not eliminating sleep.

Also, after having no sleep last night (which is sadly becoming a regular occurrence), I certainly wouldn't want to eliminate the little I do get.

Although, eating costs money, makes you fat, takes up time sure, but there is the fantastic shared experience of dining on good food with other, that I guess all the DVD/computer game obsessed shut-ins could gladly do without.

That Ballard story goes by the title "Manhole 69".

I love the bit where the chief surgeon is leaving the research facility. An assistant asks him where he's going and he replies "Where do you think? I'm going home to get a good nights sleep.". Also there's a bit in the story where they realise that the dudes are going to need a 4th meal a day, and there's a discussion about what to call it. So I guess that time gained from not needing sleep might get taken up by extra eating and shitting.

I note that Ballard never outlined their toilet habits, and they may very well have eliminated shitting also.

Which begs the question, if you had to eliminate *two* of these, what would they be?

Also there's a bit in the story where they realise that the dudes are going to need a 4th meal a day, and there's a discussion about what to call it.

This has been settled. The fourth meal of the day is "pizza." It doesn't matter what you actually eat for this meal, it's still called pizza. As in, "Hey, it's like 1:30. Let's go get some pizza."

That's true. There was a crappy restaurant near my old house that said

BREAKFAST - LUNCH - DINNER - PIZZA

on the window!

uhm I think you mean 'za

This is not my original idea, btw. I believe credit goes to La Lechera.