BESTIALITY - which would you fuck?

(She says Tiger btw. I am still weighing up my decision.)

i voted other (please specify): Please be aware that by confirming this action, you are registering your wish to see this user removed from the site. Once the user has 51 such votes from individual users, they will automatically be banned from the site.

Suggest this user to be banned.

^gtfo iltmi

Panda Bear. Noah Lennox is pretty hot.

that's a real live white-furred seal-eating panda bear, score one

giraffe

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A5T9l7f2yto

Why does fucking an ostrich seem so much more screwed up than any other animal?

Was tempted to go through the list finding pictures of bands for each of them, but got bored by antelopes.

Surely you wouldn't go for dangerous animals, anyway? Unless you sedated them, which is a whole other thing.

Also, this thread is reminding me of the horrible sleeve for Ariel Pink's 'Round and Round' single:

http://cdn.imposemagazine.com/__data/ariel-pink-round-and-round.3.jpg

You found a girl you can discuss bestiality fantasies with, eh? I wish you both the best.

Also LJ I am pretty sure pandas eat bamboos, not seals.

what a horribly formed "joke"

I don't know that this is the right time to be whipping that out as I am p sure no one even tried at a "joke."

oh - that was in reference to the thread, not your post

I bet this thread is gonna have the highest votes-to-comments ratio in ILTMI history.

"whipping that out"

I voted shark.

I'd give him my arm and then my wiener.

Physical contact

Most alpacas do not like being grabbed. Some alpacas tolerate being stroked or petted anywhere on their bodies, although many do not like their feet, lower legs, and especially their abdomen touched or handled.

</3
;,,,,(

Missing the horribly formed George Best joke answer :-(

alpacas;me

ban l0u1s jagg3r

http://img20.imageshack.us/img20/6218/blj.jpg

yeah my bleary small-hours brain confusing panda and polar is by far the most embarrassing aspect of all this

I guess if I had to pick, I'd go with the classic sheep. There must be a reason that sheep-fucking made its way into the popular hick/Australian/Scottish imagination. Someone somewhere has successfully fucked a sheep. Most of those other animals would either take a pound of your flesh on first attempt, or simply do not have any orifice that would accomodate. Maybe sheep is the only thing that works.

And a cow is too tall.

awful awful thread

o f*ck a ˁ˚ᴥ˚ˀ

>:O

found this horse butt ascii art

ZZZI????$OZO$??7I$OOZZ?7I$ZZZOZ77ZOO8OO$ZZ7ZZOOZZ$$7?I7$77$7$$OOZOZ77Z$7$$$ZZZ$7
8888Z$ZZO8O8ZOOOOO8OZZOO8ZZZ$$7$$$$77I7777777$$$Z$I$$777$Z$ZZZ77Z7$$Z$$$$$$$ZZZ7
7$$$$Z$$$$$OZZ8ZZZZZZ$$$ZZ$$$$Z77$7ZZZZZ$$$$$7II$$7ZZZZ$7$$$$Z$ZZ$ZZZ$ZZOO$$ZZZZ
D88888888888OO8Z$Z$$$Z$ZZ$$ZZZZIZZ$ZZZZZZZ$ZZZOOOO$OO88OZZZOZZZZZZZZ$$ZZ$$ZZ$ZZZ
ZOZZZZZZ$Z$$$$8$7$$$$77$$$$$$$$7$$$$$$ZZZZZOZOZZZZ$ZZOOOOOOOOOO$7$$$$Z$7$$$Z$ZZZ
OOOOOOOOZZZZZZOO$$Z$$$$$$7$77$Z7$$$$Z$$$$Z$$$$$$$$7ZZZZZZ$$$$7$7I7777$77$7$$7$$7
8OZZZZZZZ$ZZZZZZZ$$$$$Z$$$$Z$Z$$$$Z$$$$$$$$$$$Z$$$7$7$$$$$$$$$7III7II???I77$777I
ZZ$ZZZZ$$$$$$$ZZZ$ZZ$ZZ$$?I$$$ZZ$$$7+++++++7ZZOZZ$$$$$$Z$$$Z$7I++I+??++I77III77I
ZZZZZZ$Z$ZZ$$ZZZ$$7$+=+==+==+====~~~~=====~~~~~~?ZZZ$Z$$$II?+===+==++IIII7777777
ZZZZ$ZZ$$$$$7$7$$$?=======++=~~~~~~~~~~~~===~~:::~~Z7+++=~=::~~~==?IIII$$777$7II
Z$ZZOZZ$$$$$$$Z$Z=====~~====~=~~~~~~:~~~~~===~~:~==+=+++==~~===++???I7Z$7ZO888OZ
ZZZZ$ZZZZZZZZZ$$====~~==+=~~~~~~=~~~~~~~~~~~~=++??+?++=~===+=+++?I77$O888OZZOOOO
ZZZZOZ$ZZZZ$$$+===~~:~===~~~~~~::~~~:~~:~~=~~++?++=~==+??II?II77$$ZOOOO$$ZZZZ$OO
777$7777777$7+===~::~++?~~~~~::~::::~::::=+?7$7?77+???7?I$$7I$ZZZZZOOOZOOOZOOZOO
$$$7$$$$7$$$7===~:~~=?+=~~~~~:,::::::=:::~+7ZO877DMZ7IZI$$III$$$$$ZZZOOOOOZOOZOO
OOZ$Z7$$ZZ$$===~~~~=+?++~~::::::::::::::~~=?OOD$$O$+O7I$7$77$$$7$$ZZ$ZZZZOZZZZZZ
ZZOOOZOZZZ?===~~~~:~?+==~~:~:::,::,:::~::~=?Z88O8Z?+=?$II7ZZ$$Z$$Z$$$ZZ$ZO$ZOZZZ
OZOZOZZZ$$~===~~~~:~I+=~~=::::::,:::::::::=+ZOOOOO?=~~==7=7$Z$ZZOZZZOZZOOZZZZOZZ
ZZZOZOZOZ+~~=~::~~~~??==~~::::::~:::::::::~+ZZZO8O+=~~~~~+=IZOOOZZZZZOOOZOZZZ$OZ
Z$Z$$$7$7~~~=~::~=~~?+?=~~:::::::::,,:::::~+$88D8Z+~~:~~~~~+?$ZZZZZ$ZO88D8ZZOZOZ
8ZZ$ZZZO==~==~::~~=:???+~~::::~~~::,::::::=?$8888Z+~~~~~~~~~=$$ZZ$OZZOOOZZ$OOZO8
OOOZO$$O==~~=~:~=~~:?+??~~::::~:=::,,,:::=?+Z88D8$=~~~~~==~~=$ZZZOZZOZ$ZZO$OZZOZ
$ZZZOZOZ=~~~=::~~~~~?=++~~::~~::+::~~~:~~~+?O88D87=~~~~=++===$OOZZO$OOOOOOZ$Z$ZZ
OOOZ$Z$O~~~~=~:~=~~~?==+~~::~+:::::::~::~~=?DO888I~~~=~+==~=+7$ZOZOO$ZOZ$OOOOZO8
Z$$ZO8$Z~~~:=~:~~~~=I====~~:~~==~~::::~~~++?DOODOI=~+~~~=~+=+$ZZZ$$Z$ZZZZ$ZOZ$ZZ
ZZZZ$Z$Z=~~~~~:~==:~?~~===~~====++~~~~~~=~+I88DDO?~~~=~+====+ZOOO$OOOOOZOZOOZZ$O
OZOOZZOOI:~=~=::=~=~?=~===~~~~?+++=~~~=~=++?ZN8OI=~~~==+=+++?ZZO8OOZOOOZ8ODDDOOZ
88Z$ZOOOZ~~~:+~~~=~=+===+=+=~~===+++==~=+++?7NOI===~=+==+?+??$7ZOOZOOOOOOZZZOOOO
OZ8Z8$ZOZ~+~::=~~~++?=~~=~=~~~~++?+I+===?++?$87+===~====++???$OOZZ8ZZ8OZZO8OOOOZ
8ZZZOZZ$Z~+=~:~=~=~??++~==~===~+I?+??=~===?ZZOI+======++++??IOOZO$$ZOZOZZZ$OOZ$Z
OO$ZZZO8O~:++=?+=~~~~?+~++==+===?++???++=+Z78O?=======+=+???IZZO$$ZZO88ZZ7$IZZ8O
OO8OZZOOO~~~==II+=~=~?+===+=~~====+++???++I7M$?=======??+I??IO8O8Z8ZZOO8OO88OO$O
OOOZOOOOO~~~=+?=I+=~~I?+++===+=++++++??+??7ZD$?+==++++=+?+IIIZZZOZZOO8OZOOZOOOO8
OZZ8ZZ$OO?~~=+??77?+==???=++~==+=??III+?I?OMZZI+++++=~==+??I$OOZ8OZZOOZOO8$OZZZ8
OO8OOOZO8O~=~=??DDZ7??II?+?=~:==++III++$IO8MO$7?=++~~==+++?7ZO8OOOOOOO8ZOOZZOOOO
ZOOOO88OZZ+====78DDDO77$?==~=~~==??+++IZDZOO8Z$I+=~~=~=++??$Z8ZOZZO8ZZ$Z8O8$ZOOO
ZOO78OOOOOO~===?8DDD8DOO7+=~=~~:=+=~++7ZZOZ8Z8OZ7+~~~==+~+IOOZZZZOOOOZZZDZZO8O8Z
OZZOZO8OOOO==+=7DD8888ZZZ+==~~~=+?===7Z$7DOOONZZ7?=~~=?+=+7OZZZZZZ$Z8OOOOZOOOZZZ
8ZOZ8O$OZZ$====7888888ZOZ$+=~~=~??~=?78DDNNNNND77?======~+D888OOZOO8ZOOOOOOOZZ$O
OZZZ$8O$ZOD=~=+IO8OO8O7OZO?=~~:~:::~+DNNNNNNNNDD?+~~~~~~~?NDNND8OZOZ$8888OOOO8OO
OOOZZOODZ8O===7~OOOOOOOOOZO+~~~~::::=DNNNNNNNNNN=~~~::::~DNNNNNNMNND8OOOODZO8OOZ
O8Z8Z$O8OOO=+=78OOZOOOZOO$$+~:::~:::~NNNNNNNNNNNN~:~::::+NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOO8O88DN
O8OZZOOD8$II++ZD8Z88OOZZO$D8~:~~~~::~NNNNNNNNNNNN+~:::::?NNNNNMNNNNNNNNNNDOO8DNN
OO88$ZZOZO?$?~O88O88I8Z88ONN=::~::::~NNNNNNNNNNNN+~::::~?NNDNNNNNNNNNNNN8NNNNMNN
                                                                 

Inspired by a conversation with the gal I'm romancing.

How's that going for you? Does she know about this thread?

"Suggest ban" should be removed from the TMI board.

I pick cow + stepladder.

your display name betrays you

heh. Yeah, I think I should go without a display name unless I'm feeling just terrifically awfully clever.

The manatee is not an option. It ain't got no job.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tM_lrK4upvw

http://www.bizarrerecords.com/galleries/stretch/MissPiggy.jpg

^^^ Parkinson would hit it

heck, Parky would hit anything...
http://i.telegraph.co.uk/telegraph/multimedia/archive/00644/news-graphics-2007-_644034a.jpg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVE60zwXx1k

Not only do they use tools, they actually have their own version of a fleshlight.

a friend of mine, when he was a little kid, had a rabbit that used a kitten this same way.

Surely the rabbit didn't loll back on its haunches, kitten in hand, and rub one out. That has to be purely primate behavior. Otherwise everything I know is wrong, and I am going to quit my job and walk the earth.

You know, most of the time when gross YouTube clips get posted to a thread, I think "what the hell" and click play anyway. This time I'll pass...

well, rabbits don't really have hands

xp The best part is that the soundtrack is several children giggling like mad at it. If you can tap into that state of mind, this clip is nothing but good.

well, rabbits don't really have hands

My point exactly.

What exactly did the rabbit DO to the kitten, though? I'm curious now.

let's put it this way, it was non-consensual and the kitten ran away soon after. my friend thought that since both animals were gray, that they could be best friends, and so he put the kitten in the rabbit's cage before he and his family left for a weekend vacation.

Oh ok, I see. Doggy style. The monkey is a big fan of oral, I take it.

you know who else is a big fan of oral?

The makers of Altoids?

http://www.homepagedaily.com/uploads/20070802/747f61d0-97da-4be8-8a67-78099d7126a8/thumb150-sad%20kermit.jpg

your mom!

Mine was better.

according to your mom

There's a kind of a story there, but maybe later.

Bestiality vs. Your Mom jokes

Not feeling this thread at all, to be honest. Yeah, that's what my mom said, I know.

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Sealion woman!
She drink coffee, she drink tea!
Sealion woman!
Wears silk stockings with golden seams!

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

lol some of you actually voted in this

number of votes in this poll vs. number of sb's LJ got as a result of starting this poll

Turtle 1

:/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pnVOt2LK2Gg

lol some of you actually voted in this

― so you want Mark Ronson to cry into your ass (acoleuthic), Monday, June 28, 2010 12:03 AM (9 hours ago) Bookmark

NICE TRY

puma.

I voted shark.

I'd give him my arm and then my wiener.

― ride like the whinge (Zachary Taylor), Friday, June 18, 2010 6:56 AM (5 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

'gal i'm romancing' is the only regrettable aspect of this thread fyi

how many gals ago was it?

there ought to be a "buffalo gal" joke in here but i'm not doing the work

see this is my breakdown of your contributions to this thread, in order of most regrettable -> least regrettable:

insinuating that pandas eat seals > starting an ilx thread about which animal you would fuck >>>>> reviving this thread after 3 years with no new developments/pix >>>>>>> not voting in your own poll > no option for 'coelacanth' ;_; >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> 'gal i'm romancing'

(this is subject to revision pending any new and exciting post-revival hijinks)

acoelacanthic

Gal was a misspelling of gull, which is regrettable.

unreg has got me there tbf

The raccoons are beginning to scatter out, to investigate the chinks and fissures in J.'s threadbare vagina. They scamper into crevasses, they stand on their hind legs and pivot easily on their lush, soft, bushy behinds and look about in all directions. I suppose those mountains of sweetmeats and pastries attracted them; their liveliness made it seem that the food either couldn't be consumed or was insubstantial. And now, in the immemorial manner of raccoons, they're beginning to investigate.

http://web.archive.org/web/20060429233213/http://www.atf.gov/kids/graphics/art_contest/dsc_554820%25.jpg

r u sayin u would fuck that ^

Oh my god how did you dig that up

I miss my Hunter Age 3 t-shirt

Thought this revive would be about this: https://twitter.com/rey_z/status/856101892010758145

Voted Brown Bear. And wait til you hear what i would like to d-

no hoover no cred

Why does fucking an ostrich seem so much more screwed up than any other animal?

― fuck it, we're going to Olive Garden® (Z S), Thursday, June 17, 2010 8:55 PM (nine years ago) bookmarkflaglink

Zach is the ginger??