Master Baiters

Go on then- impress us

just want to note at the jump that any american itt that says "wanking" is getting an sb from me

^ discerning sb choice, and very fair imo

But 'pud pulling' is a-ok?

there was i, spurting over the whole of county limerick

anyway-

back of a car while being driven to football practice

"Dialing zero?" "Tickling the Elmo?"

choking the chicken

Airplane toilet.

ah cmon

there was i, spurting over the whole of county limerick

The most interesting part of that whole freaking book.

I remember in my high school years Dan Savage recommending to girls, who are too young at under 18 to buy their own sex toys IRL here in the states, to take apart a Tickle Me Elmo & use it's shaking inner motor as a DIY vibe. I vote no on proposition That.

two test tickles etc

An empty cigar tube filled with wasps makes a good vibrator.

When I worked as a janitor at Wal-Mart, I would go play with myself every once in a while in the bathroom. Not because I was horny or bored, but because I was tired and I needed the energy surge.

we got a thread on that too somwhere iirc. hardly outlandish

The sad reality of modern American working conditions^^^

the secret sexy lives of wal-mart employees

"I'm beat. I'd better go jill off." It's not really the most erotic story I've heard. Esepcially if she yawns while she's at it.

My favorite place was out in the woods near my home. When I was about 16 or 17 or so, I used to go out there and sit by the river, thinking and watching the little fish and the crabs. One day my mind went into strange places, like it often did, and I got really, really horny. I was wearing a long gauze cotton skirt, so I quietly put my hand underneath it and had some fun with myself. The experience was so enjoyable that I've incorporated that place into some of my sexual fantasies ever since.

"I'm beat. I'd better go jill off." It's not really the most erotic story I've heard. Esepcially if she yawns while she's at it.

It was just the first thing I could think of.

Much, much better except for the mention of the crabs

xpost

werk jerk

I want to know what the fucking fuck happened to the rest of this fucking thread.

Backtracking. Oops. I was misinformed as to what thread to go to.

My total bad, very sorry for all the profanity. No reason for all that.

oh boy! kenan's here!

http://images2.fanpop.com/images/photos/4300000/The-Circle-Is-Now-Complete-star-wars-4387162-1280-800.jpg

Someone who shall remin nameless told me that there were awesome things going on on the masturbation thread, and then we were both baffled when there were no posts about anyone's nephew or anything like that, and assumed that the thread must have been cut to hell. And that made no sense at all. Bit then it turns out that there was a lot of being wrong involved.

The person in question shouldn't tell me any such things unless the person is certain of them, and I should check.

I just hadn't ever clicked on the sex drought thread. Because no matter how long it was, or how updated it was, it sounded like it would be a bunch of fucking whining.

Someone who shall remin nameless told me that there were awesome things going on on the masturbation thread, and then we were both baffled when there were no posts about anyone's nephew or anything like that,

well, i can sorta address the nephew thing. when i was 10 or so, my family stayed overnight at my uncle's house for some reason. my uncle had recently started his hedgefund manager journey towards being fabulously wealthy, and to celebrate he had bought a laserdisc player. i was staying in his basement, which was loaded with electronic goodies. around bedtime, i was checking out some movie on laserdisc, when my uncle came downstairs to remind me to absolutely avoid checking out the upper channels on his absurd 1993 cable package, because they contained porn, and i should definitely not be checking out the free channels above channel 400 to check out the free porn, so don't no matter what, do not check out the free porn above channel 400 after everyone else goes to bed, "good night!"

totally weird, and i didn't make the magic happen that night because i hadn't hit puberty and i didn't really understand what was going on, for the record, but kind of a strange invitation to do so by my uncle.

lol that made me remember sleeping over at friend's house who had skinemax. he was a deep sleeper and i was quiet anyway

I just hadn't ever clicked on the sex drought thread. Because no matter how long it was, or how updated it was, it sounded like it would be a bunch of fucking whining.

― kenan, Thursday, September 23, 2010 4:07 AM (2 hours ago) Bookmark

heyyyyyyyy hope you ~get fucked~ my friend

I got on a kick of jerking off while driving right around the age of 17/18. The more crowded the road, the better. Not too long after that, I started smoking and no longer had a free hand.

I remember in my high school years Dan Savage recommending to girls, who are too young at under 18 to buy their own sex toys IRL here in the states, to take apart a Tickle Me Elmo & use it's shaking inner motor as a DIY vibe. I vote no on proposition That.

― Mormons come out of the sky and they stand there (Abbbottt), Wednesday, September 22, 2010 12:49 PM (5 days ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

don't really know why but i lold at this especially "proposition That" all day. proposition That.

bf shot one off in the baptism for the dead dressing rooms (<- abbott-relevant)

I got on a kick of jerking off while driving right around the age of 17/18. The more crowded the road, the better. Not too long after that, I started smoking and no longer had a free hand.

― Johnny Fever, Monday, September 27, 2010 8:10 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark

done this before tbh

Whoaaa Matt P, I hope he was watching Johnny Lingo! "Mahana, you ugly, get down from that–" *ahhh*

Oh wait, the dressing rooms. It's sad that the Holy Spirit can never be there ever again.

Jerking off in the car is for highway driving only, imo.

Presumably also best done in an automatic.

my high school was called masterman and we had a debate team and they called themselves the master baters hah hah young people are so clever

wonder how many bait shops in florida are called master baiters

I'll look into it. (No, I probably won't.)

There's a pet supply shop right around the corner, though, named PET PRO'S. Dammit people, learn how to use an apostrophe-S correctly!

I realize this is off topic, but poor grammar angers me.

I should go jerk off on their front door.

duh the shop is owned by a pet pro, think abt it

(hope you havent already jerked off on their front door, cause its unwarranted)

I think I'd have trouble getting excited about their front door.

masturbating while partner sleeps c/d

done it. *shrug*

O cold bathroom-floor tile.

Oh wow. It's been a while, but you've found something that I'd talk about, but my girlfriend reads this board, so I'm not going there. And don't ask me later, because I'll only lie about it.

http://www.thegamingvault.com/uploads/2010/09/036.jpg

"and that's the end of that chapter"

masturbating while partner sleeps c/d

I do it too.

It happens

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-soKXSOXiuA

Choice quote: "I know it's your freedom, but fuck, man."

you got all this porn and shit on your damn computer dawg... and you jackin your shit