The Mental Health Hotline

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I've been trying to help you with yours, now maybe you could help me with mine.

I dream I dial this number, and a voice says, "Welcome to the Mental Health Hotline. If you have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, please press 1. Repeatedly. If you have Multiple Personality Syndrome, press 2, 3, 4 and 5. If you have Paranoia, we already know what you want. Please hold while we trace this call. If you have Schizophrenia, listen hard and a little voice will tell you which button to press. If you have Clinical Depression, it doesn't matter which button you press, because no-one's going to answer anyway."

And then I wake up. What do you think it means?

― Dorien Thomas (Dorien Thomas), Tuesday, 6 April 2004 20:04 (twenty-one years ago)

You need a larger email base to send to joke after joke enough to use up your Storage limit.

― tyrone Shea, Monday, 12 April 2004 18:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Classic Penis Envy. Your use of the word "larger" is significant.

― Dorien Thomas (Dorien Thomas), Friday, 16 April 2004 21:57 (twenty-one years ago)

i would also venture to suggest that the employment of the word "storage" strongly points toward an anal fixation. Short of years of analysis I would prescribe vigorous anal stimulation, thrice daily.

― Dr. Martha, Saturday, 17 April 2004 23:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Dr Martha picks up on a significant point that, I confess, had eluded me. I concur. Though I do not volunteer, of course.

― Dorien Thomas (Dorien Thomas), Monday, 19 April 2004 18:07 (twenty-one years ago)

one year passes...

Stop nicking lyrics you liar, you are a thief and a sponge merchant

― Prcini lover, Tuesday, 26 July 2005 21:55 (nineteen years ago)

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