lost love?

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i suppose this one needs some background.
last year i met this guy and fell in love. he lived in atlanta i lived in dallas. to make a long story short...it was unexpected and amazing. he would visit me, i would visit him. i ended up moving to atlanta to see if we would work out. although, i thought that we were going to, he suddenly got scared and thought otherwise. he ended our relationship as quickly as it started. we both live here in dallas now. he has a new girl that hes seeing.

i of course, have taken a while to even begin to get over him. i still love him with all my heart, but have to move on.
but i had this weird little dream the other night (its been 4and half months since we ended out relationship)

the dream:
i was visiting him in his apartment, in another state. his younger girlfriend (a totally different one than he has right now) (younger as in he's 22 shes about 17-19 years old) sits on the couch. he sit very near in a chair. i sit down next to her. there are also other girls around. i try to be nice but the emotions in me bubble up and i become a sassy-bitch to her. he suddenly takes me by the hand and pulls me to the other side of the room. i immediately apoligize because i know that i was in the wrong, as i am apologizing, he gets down on one knee (as if to propose) and says...no, its ok...i miss you.... i not wanting him to ask me to marry him intterrupt him from the actual asking of the question and say really? you do? i am surprized, i am excited. i want to be with him, but not to marry him. he stands up, embraces me and there in front of his new girlfriend proceed to passionatly kiss. i wake up.

now this dream is weird to me for a couple of reasons, it is sooo true to my character. i would give lip service to this girl. where i am normally a calm and polite woman, guys that break my heart and their new love prospects bring out the bitch in me. im not jealous during a relationship, only after when i have beem rejected and hurt. i would even though i wouldnt intend to, be a bitch. wrong i know but nver the less true. and i do love this boy immensly but am not ready to marry him.
how should i take this dream?
is it just what i am hoping for?
can dreams tell the future...i mean, it sounds silly to me....but...maybe again just hopefull wishing. why was this dream so true to my character?
what do you see in it?

amy huber, Tuesday, 13 April 2004 20:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Sorry the text looks to dam long and I want to go to bed.

allsnap, Wednesday, 14 April 2004 04:22 (twenty-one years ago)


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