official i love cricket ten-point plan for rehabilitating new york city

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GIVEN THAT new york has officially® DIED a HORRIBLE DEATH with the recent stock market crash and PROBABLY all the real estate is going to be WORTHLESS and EVERYONE WILL MOVE AWAY

and GIVEN THAT i love cricket has a PROVEN TRACK RECORD in creating master plans for REHABILITATING disgraced CELEBERITIES and other PUBLIC FIGURES

THIS IS THE THREAD for BRAINSTORMING a TEN POINT PLAN to be presented to MAYOR BLOOMBERG and other NEW YORK LUMINARIES such as MAHMOUD AHMADEINJAD, TV ON THE RADIO, GAWKER® EDIOTR NICK DENTON, DEREK JETER, ALEX BALDWIN and GRAY of GRAYS PAPAYA at a special I LOVE CRICKET / PHIL COLLINS NEW YEARS EVEN BAR-B-Q / BOOZE-CRUISE

Mohammed Butt (max), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:24 (sixteen years ago)

NO IDEAS ARE TOO FAR-FETCHED... NO CONCEPTS TOO WILD... LETS BLOW THEIR SOCKS AND MAKE THIS CITY GREAT AGAIN

Mohammed Butt (max), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:25 (sixteen years ago)

turn all the skyscrapers into helter-skelters

J4gger Dynamic Pentangle (Just got offed), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:26 (sixteen years ago)

ok sorry dude that idea is too far-fetched

Mohammed Butt (max), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:26 (sixteen years ago)

:(

farms on all the rooftops

J4gger Dynamic Pentangle (Just got offed), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:27 (sixteen years ago)

WHAT ABOUT: a blog.... thats also a restaurant?????

Mohammed Butt (max), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:27 (sixteen years ago)

^^^^give this man the keys and godspeed him

J4gger Dynamic Pentangle (Just got offed), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:28 (sixteen years ago)

im sure this goes w/out saying but our plan will of course include cocaine fistfights and puerto rican spanish reeducation classes for all eligible gentrifiers

update prefs (ice crӕm), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:29 (sixteen years ago)

lou reed and laurie anderson to be installed as tourist attraction

J4gger Dynamic Pentangle (Just got offed), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:30 (sixteen years ago)

MAYBE: build a new bridge?!?!? really anywhere

Mohammed Butt (max), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:30 (sixteen years ago)

turn all the bars into subways and all the subways into bars

Mr. Que, Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:31 (sixteen years ago)

this one may be a little left field but... mayor ed koch! http://jewsforhillary.files.wordpress.com/2008/05/koch-ed1.jpg

update prefs (ice crӕm), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:31 (sixteen years ago)

bring em back!

update prefs (ice crӕm), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:31 (sixteen years ago)

a new bridge between the top of the empire state and the top of the chrysler
made of 9/11 debris

J4gger Dynamic Pentangle (Just got offed), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:32 (sixteen years ago)

fuk u lj

Mr. Que, Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:32 (sixteen years ago)

HERES A CRAZY IDEA: what if we..... FORGOT 9/11?????????????????!!!!!?!?!?!!!?!?!?!

Mohammed Butt (max), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:33 (sixteen years ago)

TWO SIMPLE WORDS: more nazis!!!!!!!!!

Mohammed Butt (max), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:34 (sixteen years ago)

ok the bridge is made of dead british ppl

J4gger Dynamic Pentangle (Just got offed), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:34 (sixteen years ago)

YAY

Mr. Que, Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:35 (sixteen years ago)

ten new statue of liberties BUT EVEN BIGGER!

update prefs (ice crӕm), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:36 (sixteen years ago)

fuck that, just ship Paris over and install it off the coast as a big theme park

J4gger Dynamic Pentangle (Just got offed), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:37 (sixteen years ago)

remove gabbneb, install dr morbius and brooklyn borough president, install marty markowitz as king of ny

update prefs (ice crӕm), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:40 (sixteen years ago)

HMMM: lets paint all the taxis... in HOLOGRAMS

Mohammed Butt (max), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:41 (sixteen years ago)

EVERY SUNDAY: citywide musical chairsss

Mohammed Butt (max), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:41 (sixteen years ago)

LETS: swap staten island and the bronx

Mohammed Butt (max), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:42 (sixteen years ago)

every escalator and elevator to have speed-date mandate

J4gger Dynamic Pentangle (Just got offed), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:42 (sixteen years ago)

have you guys ever seen the movie "the wall" well... the whole city... but like that

Mohammed Butt (max), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:54 (sixteen years ago)

delicious coffees

update prefs (ice crӕm), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:57 (sixteen years ago)

nap stations

update prefs (ice crӕm), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:57 (sixteen years ago)

free subways

update prefs (ice crӕm), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:57 (sixteen years ago)

fuckbooths

J4gger Dynamic Pentangle (Just got offed), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:57 (sixteen years ago)

with fresh linen every hour

J4gger Dynamic Pentangle (Just got offed), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 19:58 (sixteen years ago)

build a giant glass dome over manhattan

the lord of overstock (ciderpress), Tuesday, 23 September 2008 23:30 (sixteen years ago)

SELF-CLEANING WATER TAXIS DESIGNED FOR SEX

Tracer Hand, Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:03 (sixteen years ago)

how about....

CITYWIDE JEU DE PAUME LESSONS FOR UNDER-14s

Tracer Hand, Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:04 (sixteen years ago)

http://www.archnewsnow.com/features/images/Feature0008_01x.jpg

////////YAY\\\\\\\\\ (ice crӕm), Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:04 (sixteen years ago)

or...

PAID ELEVATOR ELVES

Tracer Hand, Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:05 (sixteen years ago)

yearly blackout holiday

////////YAY\\\\\\\\\ (ice crӕm), Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:05 (sixteen years ago)

UNDERGROUND FARMS you can use your metrocard at

Tracer Hand, Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:06 (sixteen years ago)

BODEGA BUCKS

Tracer Hand, Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:08 (sixteen years ago)

The song "From LA To New York" to be played over city tannoys constantly.

Carrie Bradshaw Layfield (The stickman from the hilarious 'xkcd' comics), Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:12 (sixteen years ago)

things costing less, generally

////////YAY\\\\\\\\ (ice crӕm), Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:13 (sixteen years ago)

Cricket and America, together at last.

You are wrong (Autumn Almanac), Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:15 (sixteen years ago)

CENTRAL PARK to be raised to the ground (except for the cute zoo) then cut and fill to achieve a flat surface (with a slight east-west camber to assist with drainage) replanted with grass mowed in a chequerboard pattern and with a centrally located clay pitch 22 yards long x 10 feet wide.

First person to hit a six becomes Mayor.

It's true! It's true! (SeekAltRoute), Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:25 (sixteen years ago)

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/razed

Tracer Hand, Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:30 (sixteen years ago)

first person to take an 8-wicket haul becomes king

J4gger Dynamic Pentangle (Just got offed), Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:32 (sixteen years ago)

UNDERGROUND FARMS you can use your metrocard at

― Tracer Hand, Tuesday, September 23, 2008 8:06 PM (27 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

best idea yet

Mohammed Butt (max), Wednesday, 24 September 2008 00:34 (sixteen years ago)

one month passes...

call me crazy but: what if we made jolly old englande the sixth borough?!

max, Wednesday, 29 October 2008 12:12 (sixteen years ago)

suggest ban

Mr. Que, Wednesday, 29 October 2008 13:57 (sixteen years ago)

staten island has been the worst borough for way too long

max, Wednesday, 29 October 2008 15:01 (sixteen years ago)

three weeks pass...

lee abrams of the tribune co with some intriguing ideas... how can we transplant these to be part of the official ILC 10p plan?

THINK PIECE: WHAT IF... AND THE CREATIVE/BUSINESS BALANCE
First, there are two outstanding examples of re-thinking that deserve extreme credit:

WEB DRIVING: The Chicago Tribune created one of the first Web drivers that will actually work.

CLASSIFIEDS: While we'll never get to pre Internet levels, the Sun Sentinel has created a pretty remarkable new look.

For either of these, shoot me an email at labr✧✧✧@trib✧✧✧.c✧✧ and I'll forward to you.

Below are a few videos. The first is simply a "must watch", the second is a very interesting ad that a major UK paper is using, and the third is one of those 'so bad, it's brilliant retro pieces.
While we're in the midst of a massive re-thinking of newspapers with the clear intention of, regardless of the pain, insuring ours are viable and vibrant for a long time, TV is an area I think we need to think about. Practically every business on the planet is going through economic hell. Would you have thought that GM and bankruptcy would be a possibility a few months ago? Media businesses almost always react at a point that is teetering on too late, rather than evolving when they are strong. The old line "Don't fix it if aint broke" makes no sense. It's like saying: Let it break...then we'll fix it.

Below are some TV "What if's" that tie into the idea of What if, we re-invented our news, re-invented our imaging and re-invented our overall presentation that frames regular programming with something SO stunning and fresh that it instantly positioned the other stations as corny and dated. I think the timing is NOW to think about that.

We gotta shake ourselves out of the focus group induced TV Coma, and think about evolving. NO-ONE else is...and I don't think you'll find too many people who think that the time isn't right to bring local TV into the 21st Century.

Compare these videos (and use your imagination) to what we normally see on TV:

Technology video:

http://nickgs.com/archive/Technology.wvx

Guardian Ad:

http://adsoftheworld.com/media/tv/guardian_new_thinking

Retro Cool:

http://www.archive.org/details/StoryofT1956
Part of the scenario is that there's SO much pressure to meet revenue goals that the content re-invention is off the radar. Cant worry about that when there are more pressing issues. Well, as with our newspapers, it's never been more important to re-invent CONTENT and HOW WE EXECUTE, in ADDITION to the extreme revenue pressures, so we are:

a) Aggressively adapting to the existing climate

...AND

b) Are in position to grow mightily when the ecomomy improves.
If we do these two things...I mean REALLY do them, we will be SO far ahead of the game when things turn around.
Now, "what if" we re-thought TV news and imaging:

*BLOW IT UP. OK, not where it's performing well, but I think maybe we need to isolate a station that is NOT doing well and do a complete

re-think. In watching news, they all look the same. A TV expert could point out differences, but to an average eye, they're pretty similar in timbre and vibe. I am thinking Dramatic change. No tweaks...but something that is blatantly noticeable. Not unlike a dramatic change to a newspaper. The other option is more tweaks where it all becomes an exercise that doesn't move the needle and is more of the same. NO-ONE is noticeably stepping out and CHANGING/EVOLVING news (well, with the exception of what Steve Charlier is doing). What an opportunity!

Components might include:

*DRAMATICALLY DIFFERENT NEW SOUND & VISUALS: NEW V/O...NEW music..NEW graphics. But--utilize a swat team of OUR best, in coordination with NON-TV types who will bring a whole new perspective to the screen.
The existing problem is;

--Cliché ridden. The look and sound is so clichéd. It borders on funny. the "fake drama" is plain stupid.

--In a world of I-Max and George Lucas, TV looks lame. It doesn't have to. It's not more expensive. It's a matter of breaking out of tradition.

*A WIDE SPECTRUM OF NEW HOOKS: MANY new ideas to drive the Wow factor:

*TOP 10. Number the stories. Give them a "handle" "In tonight's Top Ten: #1 Obama announces he's a Muslim; #2 Pirates sink US Sub; #3 etc......

*A TIMER. So you KNOW that at :20, _____will happen. Adds immediacy and tension. On the screen is a countdown clock.

*CRIME CENTER. It's simple...we have a Weather Center and a Traffic Center, why not a crime center with a dedicated crime expert.

*LEFT/RIGHT: We are in a polar political society. This is Pure 100% argument starting tension. A local Shana Alexander thing. No shortage of topics.

*CLASSIC NEWS: A 5 years ago, 10 years ago flashback segment. Classic works in EVERY media...why not TV. Mine the archives!

*CHICAGO (for example) BY NUMBERS: A segment reviewing the days numbers.

--Traffic Delays
--Restaurant Heath Closings
--retail sales

etc....a rainbow of numbers that define the day.

*THREE DAY OUTLOOK: We do it in weather...do it in news. What is coming up in the next three days. A forecast. Driving viewers forward.

*HOME MOVIES: A daily local YouTube.

*CHICAGO (for example) SAYS: A question of the day with responses on the web and a DEEP and mapped poll result segment every day. A fascinating daily poll on what Chicago (for example) is thinking.

*VIEW FROM THE STREET: Every day, an average person is interviewed about top stories. We've heard what the experts think, lets open it up to REAL people. This could be red hot. What the average citizen's take on the topics is.

*WEEKLY THEMES: Religion in America with a different faith studied every day; Restaurant week with a different star chef interviewed every day; You get the idea. Take a hot topic and THEME the week. (yeah--we're talking about many of these on the print side too...)

*CASUAL STYLE: What with the suits and ties? I'm not suggesting sloppy...but business casual...maybe even eccentric as the Crime expert could be in a Columbo styled rumpled sweater.
...but CHARACTER, not straight laced uptight "TV News people"

*PRESENTATION:

*One anchor. (plus "experts" in weather, crime, etc...) Maybe the only way to kill that mindless happy talk. He or She narrates the footage rather than reads the prompter.

*QUALITY: All of this tied together with a level of seriousness instead of trying to be funny and cute. I'm thinking a 60 Minutes vibe. Hard core presentation, but the new features keep it interesting and not journalistically ponderous.

*ATTITUDE: That we ARE going to completely and totally revolutionize local news. WITHOUT COMPROMISE...WITHOUT "TV experts" telling us it can't be done......without egos getting in the way.

Are the above points valid? I don't know, but that's not the point. The idea here is to start re-thinking TV. Instead of relying on the old playbook and assuming it's right. It may be right until someone has a better idea. I think we should be in the "better idea" business.

...on the newspaper side, a nice AFDI from the Hartford Courant:
HARTFORD COURANT OBAMA COVERAGE:
CHANGE08
We're devoting one of our two open nation/world print pages to Obama-related coverage every day, under the page topper CHANGE08. This includes a package of short items under the header OBAMA WATCH. We're referring daily from A1 to the CHANGE08 page and its corresponding web content, as well as to daily coverage in the Features sections.
HISTORIC PAGES
We plan to run an "8-pack" of historic election pages from the Courant archives -- one each Sunday, from November 30 through January 18 -- starting with our coverage of George Washington's election in 1789. Each Sunday, a four-page broadsheet insert will feature a cover introduction and strip ad, an historic page spread across the inside double-truck, and a back cover ad. The "8-pack" -- Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, FDR, Kennedy, Nixon, Reagan and W -- will connect to expanded online content, including all 44 historic election pages from the Courant. Circulation, marketing, NIE (as well as advertising) are all actively involved. This is a big opportunity for us, and the content of these pages is fascinating (statewide town-by-town results, for example, of the Lincoln-Douglas race). The cover introduction to each Sunday section will reference the changing nature of the newspaper's coverage (until Harding in 1888, presidential elections were reported on page 2). The pages also place the recent redesign in the context of constant, dramatic change in the look of the paper.

10-DAY COUNTDOWN
Beginning Sunday, January 11, a strong daily A1 and CtLiving cover presence of Obama-related stories, boldly labeled and linked to the web. We may follow a Connecticut social studies class in a serial narrative of short, daily dispatches on A1 (akin to our Charlie Company series from Iraq), with strong web presence, student blogs, photos, etc., as they travel to DC for the inauguration .

OBAMA PHOTO SPECIAL SECTION /KIDS' LETTER IN ITOWNS
Sunday, January 18, our version of Chicago Tribune's "Obama, A Life in Photos" OR Tribune-wide special section. Special editions of iTOWNS, featuring kids' letters to Obama.

MLK DAY /SPECIAL SECTION
Monday, January 19, a special section (or A1 plus inside A pages) highlighting the racial history of Connecticut, barriers broken, etc. , OR a special section chronicling King's life and career through historic pages from the Courant archives (it's been 40 years since his death).

POETRY
Tuesday, January 20, we commission a poem by Marilyn Nelson, African-American poet laureate of Connecticut. We would run other famous inauguration poems, plus lots of "vox populi" with links to web. A readers' poetry contest online, with selections in print????

INAUGURATION DAY
Wednesday, January 21, we blow out the front page and A section with coverage of the inauguration. (a keepsake A1 and section)

COMMEMORATIVE SPECIAL SECTION
Sunday, January 25, a photo-driven special section commemorating inauguration and first days of Obama presidency.

On balance--never before has it been so critical, and so lacking:

NEWSPAPERS: What if we REALLY balanced;

*Great writing
*Story selection that was always dead on the mark
*Stunning design
*Edgy and noticeable marketing
*Realistic staffing levels
*Competitive focus (beyond getting the story first...I'm talking re-claiming news dominance to the mainstream)
*Web Interaction that was, well, really web interaction
*Technological advances that rival the pure tech businesses
*Ad Sales that were revenue machines.

TV:

*Best possible shows (obviously)
*Theater of the Mind Audio
*Cerebral visuals
*A 2008 approach to news that is CLEARLY differentiated from what literally everyone else is doing
*Original content that resonates
*Ad Sales that were revenue machines

We do SOME of these, but What if...we did them all.

We have to.

Finally:

This will likely rankle some traditionalists, but it's an interesting piece on why USA TODAY. Two ways we can look at this:

a) Mc News. Terrible. I refuse to read about them.

b) Well, they might be doing a few things right.

"B" is probably the smarter approach as they ARE pretty popular....and it never hurts to study success.

:) Mrs Edward Cullen XD (max), Tuesday, 25 November 2008 15:40 (sixteen years ago)

*WEEKLY THEMES: Religion in America with a different faith studied every day; Restaurant week with a different star chef interviewed every day; You get the idea. Take a hot topic and THEME the week. (yeah--we're talking about many of these on the print side too...)

^^ love this idea, if it was about all of new york--"religion week" = everyone in new york has to choose a religion and worship it; "restaurant week" = everyone in new york has to open a restaurant... could be big big big

:) Mrs Edward Cullen XD (max), Tuesday, 25 November 2008 15:41 (sixteen years ago)

*CHICAGO (for example) BY NUMBERS: A segment reviewing the days numbers.

--Traffic Delays
--Restaurant Heath Closings
--retail sales

etc....a rainbow of numbers that define the day.

this idea probably wouldnt work for new york because... why would new yorkers care about chicago?

:) Mrs Edward Cullen XD (max), Tuesday, 25 November 2008 15:42 (sixteen years ago)

*CASUAL STYLE: What with the suits and ties? I'm not suggesting sloppy...but business casual...maybe even eccentric as the Crime expert could be in a Columbo styled rumpled sweater.
...but CHARACTER, not straight laced uptight "TV News people"

this is really key--lets move nyc into the 21st century and make it business casual... maybe even eccentric--would love to see bloomberg in a cardigan

:) Mrs Edward Cullen XD (max), Tuesday, 25 November 2008 15:43 (sixteen years ago)

*A TIMER. So you KNOW that at :20, _____will happen. Adds immediacy and tension. On the screen is a countdown clock.

^^ if theres one thing new york needs its a TIMER

:) Mrs Edward Cullen XD (max), Tuesday, 25 November 2008 15:43 (sixteen years ago)

We do SOME of these, but What if...we did them all.

We have to.

^^^^^ LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS ATTITUDE

:) Mrs Edward Cullen XD (max), Tuesday, 25 November 2008 15:44 (sixteen years ago)

*QUALITY: All of this tied together with a level of seriousness instead of trying to be funny and cute. I'm thinking a 60 Minutes vibe. Hard core presentation, but the new features keep it interesting and not journalistically ponderous.

sort of thinking nyc needs this attitude adjustment--no more "funny and cute"

:) Mrs Edward Cullen XD (max), Wednesday, 26 November 2008 16:02 (sixteen years ago)

two weeks pass...

fyi im working with a design team on putting the presentation together... hope youre all excited for the new years eve cruise w/ phil and mayor bloomberg

beyonc'e (max), Saturday, 13 December 2008 17:01 (sixteen years ago)

let me know if u have any last minute suggests!

beyonc'e (max), Saturday, 13 December 2008 17:01 (sixteen years ago)

did someone already say light-up sidewalks like in that michael jackson video?

♪☺♫☻ (gr8080), Saturday, 13 December 2008 23:38 (sixteen years ago)

it'd help identify the dog shit

Let a Man Come In and Do the Popcorn (PappaWheelie V), Sunday, 14 December 2008 20:41 (sixteen years ago)

we need to grant ten Jazz musicians the permission to make one monthly broadcast and then double the sending period

TOMBOT, Monday, 15 December 2008 20:00 (sixteen years ago)


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