BEIJING — If you have a moment, I’d like to tell you about an international incident I just witnessed.The United States was playing China in baseball, which was sort of weird because the Chinese do not really play baseball. The Chinese are here because … well, they were already here. The host country automatically qualifies in every sport. It is a reward for dealing with thousands of sports writers. The Chinese formed a national baseball team in 2005 so they could represent themselves well in these Olympics.
Anyway, by the time the game ended, the U.S had won, 9-1; Chinese pitchers had beaned five American hitters, including star Matt LaPorta in the head; the U.S. had plunked two Chinese hitters and nearly knocked two Chinese catchers out of the game; and the umpires had been replaced by members of the U.N. Security Council.
The biggest blow was to LaPorta’s head. LaPorta, the big catch for the Cleveland Indians in the C.C. Sabathia trade, went to the hospital and suffered a minor concussion.
“I don’t think they have maybe the right understanding of when to hit a guy, how to hit a guy — if you’re gonna do it,” U.S. player Jason Donald said. “The way they did it tonight just shows a lack of respect for the game and very little knowledge on their part of how to play the game.”
The retort from China’s manager, Jim LeFebvre: “We do not throw to hit people. We do not teach that in China or the U.S. The ball just got away from him.”
Ah, I do love the Olympic spirit. Pardon me while I wipe away a tear.
What the heck happened here? Well, in the fifth inning, LaPorta collided with Chinese catcher Wang Wei. The Chinese then replaced Wang with his backup, Yang Yang.
(I’m going to get this out of the way now: Yes, Yang Yang replaced Wang. No, I don’t know if Yang’s nickname is Yin. What are you — 6 years old? We’re talking about an international incident here! Get focused.)
In the sixth inning, American Nate Schierholtz was closing in on home plate when he saw Yang in the way. Schierholtz then decided to see if he could snap Yang in two. Schierholtz scored, but the NFL fined him $15,000 for helmet-to-helmet contact.
“If you come in and have a collision at home, you never hit someone in the chest,”
LeFebvre said. “It was an illegal slide. The umpire should have ejected him, and that’s where the game got out of control.”
The retort from U.S. manager Davey Johnson: “His viewpoint on the catcher blocking the plate was a lot different than mine.”
If you have ever watched a baseball game (and from all indications, Chinese fans haven’t) then you know what came next. In the next inning, Chinese pitcher Kun Chen drilled LaPorta.
Unfortunately, the instructional manual “How To Hit A Batter Like A Real Pro!” has not yet been translated into Chinese. Chen made two mistakes. One was hitting LaPorta high — the pitch skimmed LaPorta’s shoulder and hit him in the head. His other mistake was ignoring Lefebvre’s wishes by hitting LaPorta.
So now the Chinese manager, who is American, was mad at his Chinese pitcher and catcher, and the American manager was mad at the whole Chinese team, while the Chinese were still seething over what the Americans did, and so was the Chinese manager — who, once again, is American — and if you are wildly confused now, then you know what it’s like to be a Chinese baseball fan.
China is still hung over from its first-ever Olympic baseball victory. China Daily, which is both the nation’s English-language newspaper and the Chinese Communist Party’s house organ, breathlessly reported the news like this:
“China, a perpetual baseball minnow, defeated the mighty Chinese Taipei side.”
That is the same mighty Chinese Taipei that is 4-8 in the last two Olympics, but no matter. The Chinese are supporting their team.
Besides, when you don’t expect to win — ever — then it’s actually easier to cheer. For example, when your team is down 9-0, and backup catcher Yang Yang exacts revenge by hitting a home run off Tigers minor leaguer Blaine Neal, you go nuts.
Yang reacted as though he had just won a World Series between Earth and Mars.
He circled the bases with one finger in the air, then did some sort of dance move that ended with him touching home plate.
After the final out of the night, Neal tossed the game ball toward the Chinese dugout.
So it was a wonderful night all around for the grand old game of baseball, not to mention international diplomacy. For the last four innings, it really felt like a brawl would break out.
“No, I wouldn’t go that far,” Donald said. “This is the Olympics. It’s supposed to be about friendship across the world. We wouldn’t stoop to that.”
What if this was a pro game in the States? Would there have been a brawl then?
“There’s a good chance,” Donald said.
I can’t wait to read China Daily in the morning.
― Andy K, Monday, 18 August 2008 19:46 (seventeen years ago)