"Use other words please."

"dish"

"base knock"

"walk off"

"Outing" applies on this thread, too.

"northpaw"

j/k, really I meant "savvy"

"little things," of course

Oh man, Astros pbp guy Brett Dolan uses "pillow" instead of "base" sometimes and I shudder every time.

"slow cheese"
"ribbies"
"dingers"

Yes, anything involving cheese.

"Electric stuff" (however it could be said that St. Louis Cardinal Mike Maroth has "acoustic stuff)

I'm guessing minor league announcers would be a gold mine of stuff, you'd hear "Great googlely moogely, he smashed that ball" or something.

Other good ones I've heard:

On a 3-2 pitch: "Well, enough of this shilly shally, time for the payoff"

During shots of anxious managers: "He's pacing like an expectant father"

"He tomahawked that ball"

"filthy"

"he put some mustard on that"

"Electric stuff" (however it could be said that St. Louis Cardinal Mike Maroth has "acoustic stuff)

BANJO PITCHER

He was throwing some slow cheese while playing pepper, so the batter really put some mustard on it when he hit it.

...aaaand, he puts the squeeze on it for the out.

"he got all of THAT one"

"tim mccarver in just a moment"

"caught it RIGHT in the breadbasket!"

"tim mccarver in just a moment"

WINNER!

90% of all home run euphemisms

"he can (fill in the blank) with one swing of the bat"

"Scuffling"
"Right in his wheelhouse"

"An A-Bomb for A-Rod!"

but really, d5 otm with northpaw (I swear I just heard that for the first time the other day)

"crooked numbers"

"picket fence"

"a-rod"/"k-rod"/"f-rod"/etc

i presume you mean not just the rod family, but any consonant hyphen first syllable of last name combo?

(i.e. j-roll, b-rob)

The recent ESPN proliferation of "on the bump" (for on the mound) is VERY annoying.

SPEAKING OF ESPN: "Fill thine horn with oil and go."

The hell is that?

& I'll admit, I haven't had the pleasure of hearing "northpaw" used yet.

yeah, me neither. slow cheese is a new one to me, too.

The hell is that?

Steve Berthiaume, possibly a reader of the Bible. The other night, he said it three times within the span of one segment. It's what he often says when someone hits a home run.

"He wasn't/isn't a world beater..."

"Fastball right down Broadway"

"SCATTERED (x) hits through (x) innings"

"NO-NO," so fuckin' stupid

I still hate "slurve"

and honestly "stray-rod" wasn't THAT funny media, get over it

i like "no-no". always brings doc ellis to mind.

Referring to a player as a "piece."

Referring to a slider as a "slide-piece."

Referring to a player as a "piece."

-- Andy K, Tuesday, June 26, 2007 9:36 AM (34 minutes ago)

I do this quite a bit. Usually followed by "...of shit" (eg, Neifi, Armando, etc.)

"IT IS WHAT IT IS"

We could just cut & paste a Yankee radio broadcast, & it would be chock-full of SHUT THE FUCK UP sort of things.

<i>"SCATTERED (x) hits through (x) innings"</i>

This phrase approaches funny as the number of innings decreases, though. E.g.: "Weaver scattered seven hits over one-third of an inning in an 8-3 loss to the Royals."

That's when "clustered" becomes useful, though no one -- that I know of -- has thought to use it.

"frozen rope"

maybe it's just hockey but i am tired of hearing "highly coveted" re: draft picks and/or players.

also i hate (and this one must be baseball specific): Halfties. Which may be made up (I found it when doing an urbandictionary search for frozen rope)

"can o' corn"

"ball one as he balloons the fastball upstairs"

calling bases "sacks", ie, "ground ball to the second sacker"

hanging offspeed pitch = "that was like a rising soap bubble"

barely related Uecker quote: "The bases are loaded, like I wish I was"

hard hit single: "that ball had some serious english on it"

hmmm, "english" would mean to me that it had a serious curve to it. like in pool when you strike the cue on one side of the vertical axis to give it some spin?

actually the ball in question did have some spin on it.

There are some Two-way words, like it’s okay for Curt Gowdy to say ‘Roberto Clemente has two balls on him.’ But he can’t say, ‘I think he hurt his balls on that play Tony, don’t you? He’s holding them. He must have hurt them by God.’

RIP

TILT

Scouting lingo : "(type of pitch) sits at (speed of pitch)"

"Speed guy" (why not "base stealer"?), often heard on Baseball Tonight and on MLB Network.

Not sure how that caught on.

first-to-third speed often > base stealing

anything but "difference-maker"

Pretty sure I heard aaron Boone use both "points on the board" and "both sides of the ball" last night. Wrong sport, dipshit.

"professional hitter" (aka "marginal veteran")

Referring to a slider as a "slide-piece."

GAHHHH

"unanswered runs" and its variations always bugs me.

"crooked numbers"

― Andy K, Sunday, June 24, 2007 10:42 PM (4 years ago)

ugh ugh ugh, hate this one -- esp when it comes out of Chip Caray's mouth.

"toe the slab"

gary thorne just referred to a 'great piece of hit-and-run' after his color guy (bordick?) used 'great piece of hitting' twice in an inning

"oppo"

on the occasion of e5 losing a bat into the crowd:

"that helicoptered right into that guys dome"

Campaign

"And it's a three-RBI homer."

Calling base hits "safeties." Shut up, Chip Caray, every rain delay is your grandfather pissing down on your head.

ron darling "totally different facing roark whos a paint masterson"

can't believe you're questioning a yale product like that

just be happy you weren't told about the time he started against frank viola and the johnnies

calling players on rosters 'pieces'

"cheese at the knees"

"nibble"

calling players on rosters 'pieces'

― mookieproof, Wednesday, November 11, 2015 6:13 PM (two years ago)

also 'arms' and 'bats' for pitchers/ hitters

Can we at least sort out the pitchers from the catchers

The Philly Inquirer's 1921 use of "moist deliverymen" to describe spitball pitchers just sent a shudder through my entire body pic.twitter.com/uW63UYW62v

— Emma Baccellieri (@emmabaccellieri) March 12, 2019

"NO-NO," so fuckin' stupid

― Dr Morbius, Tuesday, June 26, 2007 9:39 AM (eleven years ago)

otm

Montas not missing many bats early on.

— Martín Gallegos (@MartinJGallegos) May 22, 2019

"elite"

(already complained about that one on the phrases-that-annoy thread)

"I'm Ted Fucking Williams--I'm a fucking elite hitter."

It just doesn't work.

elite as an adjective? as a noun it's unavoidable and p useful in my profession (vidya games. it's what you call specialized badguys who aren't bosses but aren't nobodys)

As an adjective, meaning great, or one of the best. It just somehow seems pretentious to me.

https://i.imgur.com/UOdfGUg.jpg

stop saying 'moved' instead of 'traded'

We've had three "professional hitters" in the last three minutes.

— Craig Calcaterra (@craigcalcaterra) October 2, 2019

Matt Stairs tribute

Is the subtext that the remaining hitters are amateur hour bush leagers?

actually i think the subtext is that they’re not very good at anything else

'part ways'

I keep seeing 'cosine' used to mean 'I also agree with this', but it has to be 'cosign', no?

I assume it's a joke?

^ cosine

it's for when you only agree tangentially

discus

the existence of 'live batting practice' and 'live hitters' implies . . .

"frozen pizza" = referring to motionless batters who are called out on strikes

Pretty sure I heard aaron Boone use (. . .) "both sides of the ball" last night. Wrong sport, dipshit.

― kind of shrill and very self-righteous (Dr Morbius), Thursday, September 9, 2010 11:14 AM (thirteen years ago)

this battle is being lost but utterly otm

a 298/89 K/BB ratio across 314.2 innings

not technically incorrect, but: those are the actual numbers. save 'ratio' for when you call it 3.25-to-1

Brandon Young flirts with perfection

absolutely not