Drinking the masterworks, bar none.

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The Introducing Thread has degenerated into a drinking session, and without them letting anyone know. Rather than invite everyone to go over ------> there, let's crack open the kegs and throw the pub open to all!

Below is the copied start of the degeneration. May thoughtful and considered mayhem pour forth. (Or froth, as the case may be.)

― PuzzleMonkey (PuzzleMonkey), Thursday, 18 March 2004 21:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Original SubThread

Group hug time.
-- Mikey G (...), March 18th, 2004.

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Group hug time.
-- Mikey G (...), March 18th, 2004.

okay, but watch out for the Guinness ;)

-- yesabibliophile (yesabibliophil...), March 18th, 2004.

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Cheers, Ms Bilbiophile. Although I'm more of a wine man myself. Actually, I'm going to shoot off at a tangent here, but you sometimes need to compliment what you're reading with the correct drink.
For example, Jane Austen requires a dry white wine, chilled overnight. To get the most out of Thomas Hardy you need a pint of strong ale called something like Cooper's Arse, served by a bearded man with an ooh ahh accent.

What the hell am I going on about?

-- Mikey G (...), March 18th, 2004.

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Actually Mikey G to enjoy Thomas Hardy you need to be drinking Thomas Hardy Ale!!!! But it has to be aged 5 years. It tastes like port that way.
-- scott seward (skotro...), March 18th, 2004.

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To enjoy Bukowski, you need to be drunk (to the point of puking) off of a $5.00 jug of vodka mixed with whatever remotely passes for a "mixer" in your fridge.
I'd like us all to get together and see how we mix. Some people would be sipping chilled white wine, murmuring about Jane Austin, while I'd be in a drunken rage, hollering about what a fucking god Selby is, breaking chairs across people's backs.

It would be so funny.

-- Vermont Girl (amylstende...), March 18th, 2004.

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Beware the guy in the corner reading Hemmingway. He'll get wasted, try it on with the girls, then blow his head off.
-- Mikey G (...), March 18th, 2004.

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VG, that will be me sitting in the corner murmuring to myself, drinking a vanilla diet pepsi. (not the same corner as the Hemingway guy is sitting in tho'.) Nobody can sneak up on you when you're sitting in a corner.... and you can still see everything that's going on. Spooky, huh?
-- pepektheassassin (tr3joyc...), March 18th, 2004

― PuzzleMonkey (PuzzleMonkey), Thursday, 18 March 2004 21:26 (twenty-two years ago)

We should send Hemmingway Guy to the Korova Milk Bar, I hear there's allways a spot of ultraviolence on offer there.

― PuzzleMonkey (PuzzleMonkey), Thursday, 18 March 2004 21:28 (twenty-two years ago)

good gods! I just didn't want to spill Guinness all over my Dylan Thomas - not start a bar brawl!

― yesabibliophile (yesabibliophile), Thursday, 18 March 2004 22:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Whilst you frag the lesser mortals with various remnants of the furniture at hand, I shall profer all my favorite Devil's Dictionary quotes, quaff Salmon-Billecart champagne right from the bottle, and duck, bob and weave to avoid the more painful blows. Wait, that sounds a lot like last night.

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 18 March 2004 22:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Gimme a shot, else this first-edition L'Amour gets it between the eyes!

― I'm Passing Open Windows (Ms Laura), Friday, 19 March 2004 02:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Corn likker and Agatha Christie?

― Ann Sterzinger (Ann Sterzinger), Friday, 19 March 2004 03:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Michael White, Sir, you remind me sooooo much of Major Charles Emerson Winchester III of M*A*S*H! And I mean this in a good way.

― pepektheassassin (pepektheassassin), Saturday, 20 March 2004 07:03 (twenty-two years ago)

re: Michael White -- > Mjr. Winchester III ~ jesusgods, pepek, that's dead on!

― yesabibliophile (yesabibliophile), Monday, 22 March 2004 15:26 (twenty-two years ago)

This isn't really the forum to discuss it, but I must say I rather like sherry. Not the sickly grandma stuff, but a chilled white fino.

Erm, book to go with it, how about Three Men on a Boat?

― Mikey G (Mikey G), Monday, 22 March 2004 15:30 (twenty-two years ago)

I read "The Bridges of Madison County" on a flight between Seattle and LA. I was half drunk when I boarded the plane, and then continued drinking...and reading...and I was in tears when the plane landed. I was very, very moved. It's a great book if you are very drunk and on a plane with no access to anything but more booze.

― aimurchie (aimurchie), Monday, 22 March 2004 16:48 (twenty-two years ago)

I think you have to read the work of Donald Barthelme with a large Vodka Gibson.

― Jerry the Nipper (Jerrynipper), Monday, 22 March 2004 16:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Let's see... In this alleged bar, everyone is given a list and told to tick off all the books they've read.

Vermont Girl is the first to finish. She jumps the bar and proceeds to take tequila shot after tequila shot.

― Vermont Girl (Vermont Girl), Monday, 22 March 2004 19:36 (twenty-two years ago)

yesabibliophile gets lost in her thoughts about which books on the list she read aloud to her lovers, whilst sipping away on her Guinness and stroking her Dylan Thomas...

― yesabibliophile (yesabibliophile), Monday, 22 March 2004 21:08 (twenty-two years ago)

Geez, Vermont, the only thing I've read on your LIST is the Anne Tyler. I'll NEVER get out of this corner! Pass me another diet Pepsi....

― pepektheassassin (pepektheassassin), Monday, 22 March 2004 21:43 (twenty-two years ago)

pepektheassassin
yesabibliophile

Mesdames, I was bemusedly reading your delicious and judicious little billets doux whilst I sipped a lovely little glass of Sancerre and thought to myself, "Yes, but I would have undoubtedly successfully avoided anything so un-aesthetic as actual warfare. Cuts into the reading and drinking time rather, doesn't it?" All my best. BTW, I have wooed many a lass with 'In My Craft or Subtle Art.' Capital stuff, eh?

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 22 March 2004 22:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Vermont Girl nods and raises her glass to all people coming over from "Donald Barthelme's Syllabus."

― Vermont Girl (Vermont Girl), Tuesday, 23 March 2004 20:39 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm here at a table by the jukepbox with a pint of Smithwick's atop the Gerard Genette book I should be reading, reading the David Gemmell book I can't put down. Cheers!

― otto, Tuesday, 23 March 2004 21:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Since D. Barthelme's all the rage lately, I put down The King Beyond the Gate, and fish 60 Stories from my velvet satchel. I pick my teeth with the Genette book, then order another Smithwick's and wonder, What music's appropriate while reading "The Emerald"?

― otto, Wednesday, 24 March 2004 00:21 (twenty-two years ago)

'Another Green World' - Brian Eno.

― Jerry the Nipper (Jerrynipper), Wednesday, 24 March 2004 00:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Everyone here has passed out except me. Lying in puddles of their own Guiness and tequila. I think I'll pick up everyone's books, grab another diet Pepsi, some peanuts and pickled eggs, and go home.... g'nite all.

― pepektheassassin (pepektheassassin), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 15:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Hey, don't leave! I've had a bottle of wine and I'm feeling frisky.

― Mikey G (Mikey G), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 15:25 (twenty-one years ago)

[coming to] Oh man... [slowly blinking] Where am i... [looking down at shirt] Oh man, I puked on myself... [wiping at it with bare hand, looking around the bar] Hey... Hey... Can- (cough cough) Can someone get me a glass of water? Please? I got the worst cotton mouth...

― Vermont Girl (Vermont Girl), Wednesday, 31 March 2004 17:09 (twenty-one years ago)

*yawn* O bloody hell. This is embarrassing. I go to sleep with Dylan Thomas and wake up with E.E. Cummings.

― yesabibliophile (yesabibliophile), Sunday, 4 April 2004 14:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Dylan Thomas went to sleep with Dylan Thomas and woke up with e.e.cummings. (Blarrk!) Sorry. Hope I missed your shoes.

― Dorien Thomas (Dorien Thomas), Wednesday, 7 April 2004 19:41 (twenty-one years ago)

I gotta start going lighter on the Bukowski, man. Hmmmm, maybe some Fizgerald? Wait, what am I thinking!? Gotta think of something, 'cause if I get stuck with GBS again I'm gonna lose it.

― Michael White (Hereward), Wednesday, 7 April 2004 22:00 (twenty-one years ago)

(stepping carefully over barely-moving bodies and across the puddles) Man, Bukowski would have me on the floor, too. Anybody care for a Pepsi? .... I thot not.

― pepektheassassin (pepektheassassin), Saturday, 10 April 2004 14:06 (twenty-one years ago)

FAREWELL thou thing, time past so known, so dear
To me as blood to life and spirit; near,
Nay, thou more near than kindred, friend, man, wife,
Male to the female, soul to body; life
To quick action, or the warm soft side
Of the resigning, yet resisting bride.
The kiss of virgins, first fruits of the bed,
Soft speech, smooth touch, the lips, the maidenhead :
These and a thousand sweets could never be
So near or dear as thou wast once to me.
O thou, the drink of gods and angels! wine
That scatter'st spirit and lust, whose purest shine
More radiant than the summer's sunbeam shows;
Each way illustrious, brave, and like to those
Comets we see by night, whose shagg'd portents
Foretell the coming of some dire events,
Or some full flame which with a pride aspires,
Throwing about his wild and active fires;
'Tis thou, above nectar, O divinest soul !

(Thanks to Bobby Herick)

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 12 April 2004 21:30 (twenty-one years ago)

*checks the cuffs of jeans for erk stains-finds none, hitches up bra & straightens blouse* well, I need a gallon of water and something lovely to read, I think I hear Neruda calling me... Do I have time before the mass wedding begins Vermont Girl?

― yesabibliophile (yesabibliophile), Thursday, 15 April 2004 13:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't know when the wedding is going to take place, dude. I'm beginning to think marrying every single person who enjoys books as much as me might not be a good idea. At least I had fun at this bachelorette party and puked all over myself. Besides, I meant to marry Neal Pollock in a couple months...

― Vermont Girl (Vermont Girl), Thursday, 15 April 2004 14:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Amy shamelessly getting a picture of herself onto the boards! I think you need to trim that chest hair, dear.

― Mikey G (Mikey G), Thursday, 15 April 2004 15:16 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd just like to point out my mad photoshop skillz: That bow tie he's wearing is all CGI, baby. I think it really dresses him up.

― Vermont Girl (Vermont Girl), Thursday, 15 April 2004 17:27 (twenty-one years ago)

*LOL* (Wish I had some photoshop skillz)

― pepektheassassin (pepektheassassin), Thursday, 15 April 2004 19:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Amy, what're gonna do with the meat tenderizer?

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 15 April 2004 20:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Originally, it was for Neal to whale away on his "private parts" with.

― Vermont Girl (Vermont Girl), Friday, 16 April 2004 10:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I suspected as much. Now, what's the plan?

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 16 April 2004 16:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Sounds like one hell of a bang-up love affair you got going with Neal, VG! (stop groaning, it had to be written, even if it is 2/3 of a pun. P. U.)

Well, this chapter in my autobiography won't be nearly as luridly interesting as it would have been given it would have my first bisexual mass wedding ceremony!

A toast to Miss Amy and the Neal! *raises Guinness*

― yesabibliophile (yesabibliophile), Sunday, 18 April 2004 15:47 (twenty-one years ago)

... Which brings us back to the "What to talk about when we talk about love" thread....

― pepektheassassin (pepektheassassin), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 00:43 (twenty-one years ago)

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