Please delete my thread - DUD dealing w. irrational, insulting people

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

DUD. Dealing with insulting, irrational people: an anecdote and a query.

I am a huge fuck-up.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Monday, 18 April 2005 03:42 (twenty years ago)

It crashed my PC and lost me three hours of research! Yay!

― Autumn Almanac (Autumn Almanac), Monday, 18 April 2005 04:30 (twenty years ago)

It lost me a semester of respect, tons of self-respect, and a lot of friends.

I suck.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Monday, 18 April 2005 05:33 (twenty years ago)

Crashed my PC too. Very very unhappy.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Monday, 18 April 2005 06:21 (twenty years ago)

an open discussion doesn't have to make you a ~fuck-up
but it's true we are still living in a "gotcha politics" world
so it is about what sartre said I guess
about speaking to the face of the world/
or just pretending to, I don't know

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Monday, 18 April 2005 06:32 (twenty years ago)

Also -- is there a way to didsable the search function for a day or two? I have 32 enemies coming to dig up dirt on me here, and 8000+ posts of it. Yikes.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Monday, 18 April 2005 07:49 (twenty years ago)

Remy, if I were in your position my bowels would probably have liquefied and I'd feel that it's almost possible to turn back time and undo the thread by sheer force of will. But: 1. you are not the dick in this situation; 2. the thread is unreadable now anyway; 3. hugs.

― beanz (beanz), Monday, 18 April 2005 08:26 (twenty years ago)

thx, much.

― same initials (initials), Monday, 18 April 2005 08:30 (twenty years ago)

You're not a dick Remy. You're a great guy. We all have our personal tales of horrific internet butterfly effect karma. It's a learning experience for everyone.

― moley, Monday, 18 April 2005 09:06 (twenty years ago)

Swear to god, if I ever found out who the person was who has put Jer in this situation, I'll rip them a new one. What a spiteful petty horrible HORRIBLE thing to do. It makes me sick and angry enough to think if theres even ONE person like that on this board its almost enough for me to want to leave here. For serious.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 18 April 2005 09:49 (twenty years ago)

Don't leave please, Trayce.

I can only echo the above comments, and those on the thread, Remy. Some poeple are such fucking knobs, it's infuriating to contemplate it.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Monday, 18 April 2005 09:52 (twenty years ago)

Yeah, and whatever that image is, when I tuned images on in my settings, it made my entire computer crash!

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Monday, 18 April 2005 09:54 (twenty years ago)

Oh btw I wasnt talking abt the image in the thred in case anyones confused.

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 18 April 2005 10:11 (twenty years ago)

does remy still want the thread deleted?

i have got rid of the lame images that were possibly put there in good faith to hide the contents of the thread.

i had a quick scan down and don't think it merits deletion, but remy's it's your right to have it fully deleted if you would prefer.

― Jaunty Alan (Alan), Monday, 18 April 2005 10:22 (twenty years ago)

The guidelines allow for the deletion of threads that create shitstorms in your personal life, don't they? Especially if you create them yourself?

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 18 April 2005 11:04 (twenty years ago)

that's what i meant by saying it was remy's right. (BTW the threads been de-googled - not much help, but it's something)

― Jaunty Alan (Alan), Monday, 18 April 2005 11:23 (twenty years ago)

It's only helpful if the people who've already seen it aren't just passing around the URL :\

― Allyzay Subservient 50s-Type (allyzay), Monday, 18 April 2005 12:05 (twenty years ago)

I assume that "LA-types" aren't very technically sophisticated.

― Open your eyes; you can fly! (ex machina), Monday, 18 April 2005 13:20 (twenty years ago)

Yes, and jer very badly wants this deleted or maybe made unreadable except for logged in users or anything

PLEASE

― Open your eyes; you can fly! (ex machina), Monday, 18 April 2005 13:20 (twenty years ago)

again, the poster wants this deleted asap. i put the images there until a mod could delete it. please do so

― Open your eyes; you can fly! (ex machina), Monday, 18 April 2005 14:17 (twenty years ago)

It's gone now, I missed the whole thing (away for the weekend)--I saw the first like 200 posts so I know what the thread was about--I'm assuming that the people involved were made aware of the thread?

― teeny (teeny), Monday, 18 April 2005 14:43 (twenty years ago)

Yes, at least one person did post on the thread, and apparently others saw it.

I deleted it, but saved a copy just in case remy needs it for evidence, or whatever.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Monday, 18 April 2005 14:56 (twenty years ago)

Thank you; this is important to him.

― Open your eyes; you can fly! (ex machina), Monday, 18 April 2005 15:02 (twenty years ago)

The guidelines allow for the deletion of threads that create shitstorms in your personal life, don't they? Especially if you create them yourself?

I don't want to be a total bitch about this, and I'm glad that the thread was deleted, but usually the rule is that you could request that a thread that got too deeply into your personal life (ie more deeply than you yourself had ever gone) UNLESS you were the one who put the information out there in the first place. In other words, if you created the situation/released the information, be a grownup and deal with the effect of your actions.

I guess I just want to make sure that I'm not off base in thinking this, and that everyone knows that this action was a bit of an exception because things had the potential to get really shitty. Still, it was Jeremy who made the decision to use his real name and put all this easily identifiable information out there.

― teeny (teeny), Monday, 18 April 2005 15:29 (twenty years ago)

I saved the thread as well (it was fairly obviously going to get pulled and I wanted to read it b/c it was interesting & remy is great) so if he wants a copy & sean is offline, mail me.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Monday, 18 April 2005 15:30 (twenty years ago)

Right, and SOME ILXOR made the choice of going to google people to try to cause shit for him.

― Open your eyes; you can fly! (ex machina), Monday, 18 April 2005 16:14 (twenty years ago)

Out of curiosity, how could googling the person (or, I suppose the excerpt from the persons writing) bring down the shit on Remy? (I'm not doubting you, I'm just curious abt the mechanism that caused this)

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Monday, 18 April 2005 16:23 (twenty years ago)

whatshername didnt find the thread via google

― fe zaffe (fezaffe), Monday, 18 April 2005 16:38 (twenty years ago)

trackbacks, no?

― DeAndre DeShawn Banhart (deangulberry), Monday, 18 April 2005 17:11 (twenty years ago)

UNLESS you were the one who put the information out there in the first place

And AGAIN the paradoxical head of the FAQ is raised:

Do I have copyright over things I post on ILx?

Yes.

...
Can threads be deleted? What is locking a thread?
...
- Personal threads. If a thread is started discussing a registered user or their actions, that user has the right to ask for it to be deleted or locked. The thread does not have to be an attack on the user. This does not apply to threads users start themselves and later regret.

repeat back and forth ad infinitum and re-examine history of entire board to see why the latter part I quoted is and always has been utter tripe, in practice (which is as it should be IMNSHO)

― TOMBOT, Monday, 18 April 2005 17:56 (twenty years ago)

deleting threads which contain googleable, personal details posted in a state of drunkenness, rage, depression or other unsound mental state, or that turn out to be complete shitfests for the poster, has never been beyond the purview of the moderators and that's as it should be, we are not politicians or celebrities here and it's detrimental to the tiny grip on sanity that ILX maintains to remove people's right to have things scrubbed the morning after in certain cases.

Anyway. TTFN

― TOMBOT, Monday, 18 April 2005 18:00 (twenty years ago)

So this should be changed to

Do I have copyright over things I post on ILx?
No.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Monday, 18 April 2005 19:02 (twenty years ago)

For the record:

It was an ILXor who emailed the girl in Jeremy's program, and it's likely he'll find out who it is in a meeting on Thursday.

― same initials (initials), Monday, 18 April 2005 19:54 (twenty years ago)

NICE ONE, ILE

For fuck's sake, can we PLEASE confine the mentalism to this particular sphere of the Interweb? Jesus fucking Christ.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 18 April 2005 20:10 (twenty years ago)

what sort of fucking twat would do that?

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Monday, 18 April 2005 20:53 (twenty years ago)

i mean no matter what one thinks of remy, even if he's rubbed some coward on ilx the wrong way, i can't imagine a shittier thing to do under these circumstances.

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Monday, 18 April 2005 21:10 (twenty years ago)

Jesus, for fuck's sake...

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Monday, 18 April 2005 23:05 (twenty years ago)

fuck, this sucks. Remy, my heart goes out to you--please don't take my question above as anything other than opening discussion, my best goes out to you and I want to do whatever I can to make it better.

― teeny (teeny), Monday, 18 April 2005 23:24 (twenty years ago)

See why I said I was pissed off?

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 18 April 2005 23:53 (twenty years ago)

that's someone that needs to get their IP address blocked, eh?

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 00:11 (twenty years ago)

hear hear!

Do I have copyright over things I post on ILx?
No.

-- Mr Noodles (infinitecow...) (webmail), April 18th, 2005 4:02 PM. (Mr Noodles) (later) (link)

That doesn't hold water.

― Open your eyes; you can fly! (ex machina), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 01:54 (twenty years ago)

It's not exactly a leather glove now is it?

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 02:33 (twenty years ago)

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 03:35 (twenty years ago)

Agreed. How does one enforce an unwritten social contract?

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 14:27 (twenty years ago)

also copyright doesn't mean that if you're a novelist (say), you're allowed to go burn all existing copies of your books no matter who owns them.

― s1ocki (slutsky), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 15:11 (twenty years ago)

I agree with Teeny and Tombot. I missed this thread and I'm sure this was a shitty and horrible situation for Jeremy to be in, but at the same time I wouldn't want it to set a precedent because there are some posters who could end up having half the board because of what they said when they were drunk or upset.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 19:55 (twenty years ago)

Half the board deleted, I mean.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 19:55 (twenty years ago)

Thx, all.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Tuesday, 19 April 2005 22:04 (twenty years ago)

the "unwritten social contracts" that hold this joint together are fodder for probably at least a 20 pager of a single-spaced 2-column pdf if I ever find a course in my curriculum that might apply.

― TOMBOT, Tuesday, 19 April 2005 22:22 (twenty years ago)

also copyright doesn't mean that if you're a novelist (say), you're allowed to go burn all existing copies of your books no matter who owns them.

Although I believe it does give you the right to prevent your publisher from publishing/distributing them (depending on what your contract is like I suppose).

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 20 April 2005 22:15 (twenty years ago)

It's Thursday here. I'm v much hoping to find out who this fuck is.

― A Viking of Some Note (Andrew Thames), Thursday, 21 April 2005 10:07 (twenty years ago)

can't be done. but as far as I know, everybody's early suspicions are spot-on. I'm not going to say any more.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Thursday, 21 April 2005 17:24 (twenty years ago)

Pity I didn't have any early suspicions.

― A Viking of Some Note (Andrew Thames), Friday, 22 April 2005 04:37 (twenty years ago)

you pissed off the wrong lady remy!

― j blount (papa la bas), Friday, 22 April 2005 06:42 (twenty years ago)

If UK copyright law applied, I'd *assume* the situation with ILX posts would be similar to the situation regarding letters. If you send somebody a letter, you retain copyright over the words in the letter, but the recipient owns the physical object and can do what they want with it so long as they do not infringe copyright - including, destroying it.

Ergo, if a mod deletes a thread that doesn't infringe the posters' copyright. If a mod were to copy a thread and publish it elsewhere, it would.

― caitlin (caitlin), Friday, 22 April 2005 06:59 (twenty years ago)

i moved those noisy threads to the noise board.

― Jaunty Alan (Alan), Friday, 22 April 2005 08:03 (twenty years ago)

So Kacka was Remy's classmate?

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Friday, 22 April 2005 12:46 (twenty years ago)

I'm so confused!

― Shatterproof Glass (dymaxia), Friday, 22 April 2005 15:48 (twenty years ago)

ILX needs a password-protected board for juicy gossip threads. It might last a whole 24 hours!

― Curious George (1/6 Scale Model) (Rock Hardy), Friday, 22 April 2005 17:36 (twenty years ago)

I no unnerstand.

― Shatterproof Glass (dymaxia), Friday, 22 April 2005 18:54 (twenty years ago)

No. I don't think this is the person w. whom I have a problem, actually.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 22 April 2005 21:04 (twenty years ago)

Also: the person who forwarded the thread to my classmate is a regular ILX poster. I happen to know the name they assumed to forward the email implicates (but doesn't positively identify) them.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Friday, 22 April 2005 21:08 (twenty years ago)

you should share this information here, for utilitarist hivemind ratiocination

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Friday, 22 April 2005 21:32 (twenty years ago)

If Remy wants something done he can make his case to the mods (maybe he already has, just not to me!), if he doesn't, that's his business too.

― teeny (teeny), Friday, 22 April 2005 22:27 (twenty years ago)

THREE-FOURTEEN-ONE-FIFTEEN. IT'S CODE, GEDDIT?

― Not Saying, Friday, 22 April 2005 22:35 (twenty years ago)

*shenanigans*

― efil4zelffor (deangulberry), Friday, 22 April 2005 22:47 (twenty years ago)

the code is out, now it's up to the powers of logic and deduction of ilx users, alongside those of the mods detective!

te dum te dum etc (pink panther theme)

(i can harldy wait for the parlour scene)

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Friday, 22 April 2005 23:44 (twenty years ago)

chk yr email again, teeny.

― Remy (x Jeremy), Saturday, 23 April 2005 00:29 (twenty years ago)

hm, nothing in the inbox or the spamtrap...send it to teenydreams at gmail if you please.

― teeny (teeny), Saturday, 23 April 2005 02:15 (twenty years ago)

resent. I tried to webmail it earlier ... is that addy innacurate?

― Remy (x Jeremy), Saturday, 23 April 2005 03:02 (twenty years ago)

haha i figured out what the code was just by the 1 and 3 positions

― Open your eyes; you can fly! (ex machina), Saturday, 23 April 2005 03:15 (twenty years ago)

Just to play devil's advocate, if you were some quietly shitty ILXor who wanted to be passive-aggressive in a moment of spontaneous asshattery, yet wanted to protect your identity, what name might you assume?

However, I trust the judgement of Remy on this matter! I haven't seen the evidence at hand.

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Saturday, 23 April 2005 04:15 (twenty years ago)

It was C-N-A-O!

― efil4zelffor (deangulberry), Saturday, 23 April 2005 04:21 (twenty years ago)

no... it was I...Elalls.
g'bye crool world

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Saturday, 23 April 2005 04:25 (twenty years ago)

resent. I tried to webmail it earlier ... is that addy innacurate?

both the email I use on the board and the one connected to webmail are valid, so maybe it's a problem with webmail? I have replied now, thanks.

― teeny (teeny), Saturday, 23 April 2005 16:37 (twenty years ago)

Reveal the secret to me too, Remy! I'm totally curious now.

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Saturday, 23 April 2005 17:04 (twenty years ago)

alex tell me when remy tells you.

― j blount (papa la bas), Saturday, 23 April 2005 19:09 (twenty years ago)

James, tell me when Alex tells you, please. (we can do a chain letter)

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Saturday, 23 April 2005 19:39 (twenty years ago)

pash, hit me with the info when blount tells you

― Gear! (can Jung shill it, Mu?) (Gear!), Saturday, 23 April 2005 23:16 (twenty years ago)

We totally suck at technology.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Sunday, 24 April 2005 01:25 (twenty years ago)

we totally suck ~~at technology~~.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Monday, 25 April 2005 12:07 (twenty years ago)

Remy never emailed me so I never got to start the chain. :(

― Alex in SF (Alex in SF), Monday, 25 April 2005 18:51 (twenty years ago)

smoke signals

sorry remy

― hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 26 April 2005 08:00 (twenty years ago)

HI DERE VOLMUME 4

― RANDS, Tuesday, 26 April 2005 18:05 (twenty years ago)

SPILL IT!

― charleston charge (chaki), Tuesday, 26 April 2005 20:51 (twenty years ago)

You guys totally suck at one cryptanalysis

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 28 April 2005 03:47 (twenty years ago)

C-N-A-O

― rogers broseph (deangulberry), Thursday, 28 April 2005 05:07 (twenty years ago)

lmao

― Open your eyes; you can fly! (ex machina), Thursday, 28 April 2005 06:45 (twenty years ago)

rotplus1everyother1

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 28 April 2005 11:33 (twenty years ago)

so doesn't it seem obvious that this happened contemporaneously with Trayce 'pick'ing Remy on that anonymous-crush thread started by someone who 'pick'ed Trayce (guess who)?

and if this person is the same as specified above - shocker/loser - am i the only one who thinks that one of the people in the telephone game above is an alter ego of same?

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Thursday, 28 April 2005 17:16 (twenty years ago)

Um... what? I dont see how this is related to me at all?

― Trayce (trayce), Friday, 29 April 2005 12:39 (twenty years ago)

(fwiw I still have no idea who started that thread and mentioned me, tho I'd love to know!)

― Trayce (trayce), Friday, 29 April 2005 12:40 (twenty years ago)

This thread has been locked by an administrator

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.