Remake/Remodel: DC Rebirth so you don't have to

lol @ the chutzpah

* Old man Johnny Thunder stares out of a window for 8 pages

Rorschach pulls off his 'real' face to reveal that his ACTUAL real face looks like the mask that he wears over what we all thought was his real face. It's possible that this is, in fact, a third mask with a real human face underneath but we'll have to wait and see.

Oh, and he wasn't actually killed by Ozymandias because, um, Earth Prime...?

(These are not real spoilers, btw, despite being similarly stupid.)

I can only assume the final issue will feature Ozymandias delivering an issue-length monologue on the virtues of corporately-owned IP while pissing directly into the face of an Alan Moore analogue.

Without wishing to troll, the Legion is dumb dated bullshit and can fuck off

― Mince Pramthwart (James Morrison), Wednesday, December 27, 2017 9:04 PM (one month ago)

I now have a more developed response to this post, which is... I (sadly) sort of agree with the sentiment (if not the spirit or expression).

I've been reading The Curse, a collection of prime Levitz-Giffen '80s Legion material (it covers #297-313, plus a few Annuals). Coming on the heels of "The Great Darkness Saga," the plotting is looser and not as virtuosic in as that storyline (how could it be?); but this works in the book's favor in certain ways, making it lighter and more accessible. Issue #308 seems to be a creative high point, featuring the best Giffen artwork that I've ever seen (every page is terrific); though to be fair, Giffen only draws the main story and not the second half of the book (a "Meanwhile..." sidebar that ends on a genuinely funny joke).

But it also makes me realize how tightly my appreciation of the Legion is tied to this particular era/creative team. It's not really about the characters themselves -- as even after reading a fair amount of Legion material, I find I have a hard time remembering who they all are, their powers and backstories, etc. (Maybe because there are so many of them, and each gets so little "screen time," you have to read the series for years to keep track or get invested -- thus the stereotype of the lifelong Legion superfan?)

Also, while I originally got off board after the "Five Years Later" era, I have read reviews, summaries, page scans, etc. of the various reboots and relaunches; and nothing really gets me interested. So while of course it's common for old & "evergreen" properties to be successfully revived for a new era, and anything could always happen, I feel like chances of it happening for the Legion are very remote... at least for me. That "Legion feeling" seems to be a certain kind of geeky lightning in a bottle that probably can't be recaptured, especially by today's DC, even if the "retroboot" team is supposed to be a close analogue of the original.

The Abnett & Lanning Legion is the only one I care about after the Five Years Later stories.

They were in the Reboot, right? Is there a collection of their stuff I should check out?

They’re first run was around the turn of the century. The reboot stuff wasn’t nearly as good. I think DC just started to collect them but I’m not sure how far they’ve gotten so far. I think they’re publishing them as The Legion by Abnett and Lanning

Their first run. I hate fat thumbs and autocorrect

I've been reading The Curse, a collection of prime Levitz-Giffen '80s Legion material (it covers #297-313, plus a few Annuals).

this was FOUR HUNDRED AND FIVE MONTHS before Rebirth FYI and ffs

lol

LOL — this is the de facto “active DC thread” (and didn’t seem worth reviving some old thread for). But apologies to the Distinguished Competition....

the stupidly titled rolling 2018 thread exists, if you don't want to use the LSH thread for whatever reason

Mods, please add the subtitle 'aldo's slow-motion nervous breakdown' for the sake of clarity plz.

And then I can adopt the same style when/if I ever do my own 'mental illness as expressed by obsessively reading every title published by Marvel' companion thread.

This title followed the format of previous "Aldo Reads" threads iirc

They can all get modded to mental breakdown titles if you like.

(I am still hate-reading everything btw with the emphasis very much on the hate for the most part.)

At least DC has some highpoints now. First time in years.

This has been a doozy of a week.

Nightwang becomes a male stripper.
Bats makes out with Green Lantern.
Bats nearly makes out with Wonder Woman.
The main Green Lantern plot is about Tinder for superheroes.

But most importantly...

Wonder Woman's pet giant kangaroo is back in continuity.

"...can't swipe left... on YELLOW"

Should I mention the kangaroo is called Jumpa?

Jumpa is featured in the kid-oriented "DC Super-Pets" books, FYI - http://www.capstonekids.com/characters/DC-Super-Pets/index.html

lol, the Flash has a turtle sidekick named Whatzit???

fastback or gtfo
http://foxsuperpowerlist.files.wordpress.com/2016/09/turtle-mimicry-fastback-dc-whos-who-7-1985.jpg

tbf (and before sic does an ACTUALLY) terrific whatzit is a golden age funny aminal character for dc in the 40's so there's provenance
http://www.cosmicteams.com/cosmic/img/FunnyStuff_01_1944.jpg

Speaking of Fastback – the Zoo Crew are featured in the big Super Pets “Character Encyclopedia” (it’s a fun book; better than the storybooks); along with tons of other animal characters that I assume all originated somewhere in the DC canon.

Wow, you guys... were not kidding about how good that Kite Man shit was. Damn!

hell yeah

Read this in a bookstore, it's a legit fun Expanse-style take on Green Lantern with no Geoff Johnsisms whatsoever.

https://www.avclub.com/green-lantern-earth-one-spotlights-how-dc-comics-is-lo-1823995385

Wow - AV Club does a double whammy of an autoplay video and a pop-up prompt to subscribe to their newsletter!

reserved it from my library

OH NO THEY DIDN’T

Back in the present, Rorschach II is freed by "Jane Doe", who is revealed to be the Pre-Zero Hour version of Saturn Girl, the cause of the voices in Rorschach II's head.

that’s not real

no, that’s def real

or is it

Can't wait to see that twist adapted in Suicide Squad II

Geoff Johns exiting his DC President/Chief Creative Officer role.

so long, fucko

Sadly, it’s worse for us as it means more Geoff Johns comics

#DCUDOOMPATROL premieres February 15, only on #DCUNIVERSE. pic.twitter.com/CHF5U3SLQs

— DC Universe (@TheDCUniverse) December 21, 2018

Tearoom of despair

https://www.cbr.com/doomsday-clock-dr-manhattan-dc-universe-connections/

I'm quietly optimistic about Doom Patrol, the Titans series was at least 50% good and the Doom Patrol ep the best of the bunch.

those poster look pretty fkn cool tbh

shamefully admit i am interested in that Doom Patrol series. still too lazy to subscribe to a network though

Especially an all-DC one.

cosign on all the above; i imagine they'll do some sort of big tech package deal where it comes with something like youtube tv eventually though.

Looks like there’ll be a Warner streaming service in the fall. I expect they’ll roll it into that when it launches

I find it unlikely the upcoming Warner service, the upcoming Criterion service AND the DCU service will all be running individually by the end of 2020.

Did Clark Kent have adventures as Superboy in the current/mainstream continuity, or is it still the post-Crisis thing where he didn’t?

Guess this, uh, “clears it up”:

In current mainstream DC continuity, Superman does not begin his public superhero career until adulthood. However, as a teenager he joins the Legion of Super-Heroes,[51] and used the name "Superboy" while visiting the 31st century.[52] Thus, most of Kal-El's pre-Crisis on Infinite Earths stories with the Legion are once again considered canonical. In addition, Clark wears his Superboy outfit when he works as a clandestine superhero in and around Smallville.

Yeah this was 'clarified' when Superman and Superman watched Superman blow up then Superman left Superman to be the only Superman and Superboy became 'Superboy' and not Superboy leaving the way clear for Superman to have been Superboy.

The only trouble with that wiki answer is that although that Superman was Superboy in the future with the Legion, there currently isn't and never was a Legion because reasons, although the Legion members may exist but just not remember they never existed.