X-Titles: S & D

New X-Men is my everything-I-wished-the-X-Men-could-and-should-be book, and I look forward to Astonishing every month. Other than that, I'm shockingly poorly-read when it comes to the other titles and the back catalog. I've never read an Ultimate title. I've got fond memories of the X-tinction Agenda arc, but I didn't regularly collect as a kid.

Madolan to thread to give props to Storm's-mohawk era X-Men and other oddities. :>

What I can see on my bookshelf from here (I'll think more about it and have a better answer later):

D: X-Men Visionaries: Joe Madureira, which I got for winning a contest at anotheruniverse.com. The problem with these Visionaries collections when the V is an artist is that there's no cohesive story, just a scattering of issues that make no sense out of context.

S: the Claremont-Byrne era in the Essentials volumes; I always forget if Uncanny is Claremont, and Adjectiveless is Stan Lee, or the other way around. I'm guessing the other way around, though. Anyway, the Essentials collections are a great way to get the high points of the pre-multititle X-Men cheaply. You've got the All-New, All-Different X-Men, the introduction of guys like Wolverine and Colossus and Nightcrawler, "Welcome to the X-Men, KITTY PRYDE ... HOPE YOU SURVIVE!", the Brood, the Shi'ar (were they introduced earlier, or did Claremont create them?), Phoenix/Dark Phoenix, "Days of Future Past" and the whole mythology of the Mutant Registration Act and the Anti-Mutant Dystopia ...

This is Memphis-era Elvis, this is "In the Ghetto" and "Suspicious Minds" before pills and sandwiches and fame took their toll.

Undecided -- Mutant Massacre TPB:

On the one hand, I can't help blaming this for all the crossovers that followed. I mean, it even crosses over into POWER PACK, for heaven's sake.

On the other, it's a pretty good story in its own right, better than those later crossovers with the exception of the good 10% of Inferno. If you believe the Memphis Elvis X-Men still had breath at this point, this was their last gasp.

On the third hand, either the printing quality is crap or the art was crap to begin with -- my copy (in TPB) is very muddy and washed-out.

Cyborg-spider Cameron Hodge was a great villain.

Um?

DO NOT DOUBT CYBORG-SPIDER CAMERON HODGE!

Heh. Don't mind me - I'm a supersnob, and am ever-so-slightly more fond of CH as a human back-stabbing nebbish (and he was involved w/ Angel becoming Archangel, wasn't he?) than as the X-Tinction Agenda drool-pooling mastermind. Which is to say I'm not too fond of what the early issues of _X-Factor_ had to offer, except for some Walt Simonson art.

UM, the early issues of X-Factor are WHEN he was a backstabbing nebbish, though.

I really need a translator. What I Meant To Say: I don't like CH (or early _X-Factor_) much at all, but I like the early CH better than the latter CH.

I have a lot of nostalgic goodwill for early X-Factor because I was so excited about it at the time, but I think nostalgia is all it is; where XF is concerned, I'll stick with PAD's run.

When I was a kid I loved the Claremont X-Men, but where the 2000ADs I was reading at the time can still be enjoyed today - even more so, in fact - Claremont just seems to have been grown out of... so all that's left for me is New X Men, particularly the Quitely issues, and the sublime X-Force/X-Statix, which hiccupped around the Di-only-not shenanigans but never really lost track completely.

I have a particular fondness for the road trip era of X-Force.

In addition to S: PAD's X-Factor (which is usually available in quarter bins anyway), also S: Excalibur. Not the whole book, definitely, but I liked (not quite loved) the bulk of Claremont's run on it, which was certainly helped by Alan Davis's art, even if he's one of those Everyone Has The Same Face guys (like Byrne), which made the Hey She Looks Like That Chick plot slightly irritating. Of course she looked like that chick. You know who else looked like that chick? Captain Britain. You know who else? Margaret Thatcher. You know who would look like that chick if he wasn't blue? Nightcrawler. You know who refuses to appear in this book? Wolverine, because he's the best at what he does, and what he does isn't very pretty, but the face that everyone in Excalibur has is.

A lot of people thought the Cross-Time Caper ran too long, and they were probably right, but I always liked those Sliders-type storylines (except I didn't like Sliders). I'm not sure where the book lost the mark, but lose it it did for awhile, until Warren Ellis picked up the slack -- his run was inconsistent, but he did a good job with Kitty Pryde and her relationship with Constantine-rough-draft Peter Wisdom. (The Pryde and Wisdom mini wasn't as good, though.)

To date The Mutant MAssacre remains the best-plotted, tightest and most sensible crossover event the X-Books have ever produced (and you didn't REALLY have to buy all of them to figure out what was going on).

I remember really liking how the main teams simply didn't meet each other in the Mutant Massacle.

YES. And also each title had a self-contained storyline that made a larger picture once you put them all together, ie A CROSSOVER THAT MADE NARRATIVE SENSE.

Younger readers will be laughing and pointing now but in the old days such wonders did indeed walk the earth.

In terms of S&D, it's a hard one. Individual stories are so not the point of the X-Men, it's all about the big sweeping arcs, which makes crossover-mania particularly pointless.

I'd second most of the stuff recommended upthread - the Peter David X-Factor is pretty fun, X-Statix is great, New X-Men excellent etc etc. I can't get right behind the Claremont/Byrne run, everything in it is SO over-familiar and (unlike with Lee/Kirby) the overwrought emo writing stops me getting much of a sense of wonder from re-reading the stories. I'd prefer to recommend the slightly less celebrated mid-80s Claremont, including the Mutant Massacre I suppose. Not that the Uncanny X-Men book itself was great (though its ideas are a bit less strip-mined than the Byrne and Cockrum runs) but the other stuff he did I think might still be good, especially -

- Asgardian Wars: his cod-epic dialogue actually HAD A POINT in this big X-Men/New Mutants crossover, plus everyone gets something to do and the art is great.

- X-Men/Alpha Flight: can't remember much about the story though it was a fairly quiet character piece sort of thing, but the Paul Smith art was gorgeous.

- New Mutants 18-35 or so aka the Sienkiewicz run and just after, then IIRC it gets stranded in Secret Wars II awfulness and a time travel story, but actually most of the first 50 NMs are good, Claremont was obviously more relaxed on them. The Sienkiewicz run is - with a not-read-them-for-years caveat - GREBT though, several quite dark psychological stories with totally mental avant-pop art. The split personality Arab/Israeli one is particularly intense I think.

Can we put in a word for the original run? It's patchy, but there is some great stuff in the first Essential volume - I love the introduction of the Juggernaut, the tension building as he mows through their rather lame defences and Xavier tells his story - and some tremendous Kirby art. Once he leaves it's mostly pretty rubbish, though.

I was actually going to offer an S towards the UXM era Tom mentions. I got into the X-Men in the mid-80s, so I have a fondness for the Paul Smith era (all, um, 8 issues of it), and the first JR JR run (from #175-210, especially most of the pre-#200 stuff). I'd also like to put my ample weight behind Jim Lee's UXM sporadic run (fill in on #248, then a 3-issue run from #256-258, and then a legitimate "run" between #271 and #277, I think), which might not be the best in terms of story (especially on the heels of that interminable Seige Perilous hoohah), but definitely ranks high in my book in terms of sheer BIFF! BANG! POW!ness.

AND THE ANNUALS! 3 of them (#9, #10, #12) w/ fantastic Art Adams work, and #11 has some snazzy Alan Davis same-face action.

I'd also like to rep for the "time travel" bits of _New Mutants_ that featured Jackson "Butch" Guice & John Beatty on the art tip, my favorite Guice stuff up until his CrossGen work. (Well, he did pretty good stuff on _Flash_, too.) Especially #50, with Warlock & Cypher & the crew (MAGIK!) facing off against THE MAGUS!

Also, I am the only person who liked the New Mutants portion of the Fall of the Mutants storyline and its immediate aftermath.

Actually, I'll back you up on that & rep for the Louise Simonson / Bret Blevins NM stuff between FotM & Inferno. I'm bailing as soon as I get a whiff of N'astihr (sic!), though.

Bret wasn't the best artist in the world but he did a great "traumatized teen sobbing over the cooling corpse of a fallen teammate". Too bad about those character designs, though.

The Dark Phoenix Saga, when I first read it as a kid, seemed like the best team superhero story ever. All subsequent X-stories had to live up to it, and few did.
I loved the Paul Smith & JRJR runs in the 80s on Uncanny.
I loved the first Claremont-Miller Wolverine mini.
I loved PAD's X-Factor.
I quite liked BWS's Weapon X.
Excalibur never lived up to the Moore-Davis and even Delano-Davis Captain Britain it was essentially a spin-off of.
I always hated all the Cockrum stuff.
And nobody has really mentioned it, but the first Jim Lee run on Uncanny, before they gave him his own X-Men comic, was fantastic. Only for about 6 issues, though...

Actually, a correction from my post - Jim Lee's UXM run went from #267-277 (or so I was lead to believe) (and I know there was filling in done in some spots).

Okay, SWEET JESUS. I picked up the latest (? part four of "Oh No The Fury Oh No") issue of Uncanny last night at Borders, and the "previously, in the X-Men" page was so ludicrous I had to call my girlfriend in to read it, and then I didn't want to read the actual issue. (Which was both less ridiculous than I expected, based on the "previously," and maybe less good.)

I should retype it here. In fact, I'm going to go get it and do that.

PLEASE DO!

Dude, you're sooooo behind - the LATEST issue has the X-Folk getting trounced by Viper in Murderworld to rescue the Queen of England! In think the issue you have features super-terrific Sage suckerpunching The Fury.

But yeah, what Tom said.

Here we go -- I was going to highlight the parts that struck me as just surreally ridiculous, but I don't think I even need to (there is one thing that I will comment on in separate post, because it honest to God haunts me):

PREVIOUSLY in UNCANNY X-MEN "THE END OF HISTORY":

#444 PART ONE OF FOUR

At the newly rebuilt Xavier Institute for Higher Learning, a new team of X-Men has been assembled: STORM, BISHOP, SAGE, MARVEL GIRL, NIGHTCRAWLER, CANNONBALL, and WOLVERINE. Led by Storm, this new team is code-named the X-TREME SANCTIONS EXECUTIVE (or X.S.E.) because of their internationally-sanctioned duty to resolve mutant threats arising anywhere in the world.

The newly assembled X-Men's first mission pits them against the mysterious WEAPONEERS OF AL-KHALAD who threaten the people of the Central Saharan Republic. The X-Men dispatch these villains without incident. However, things don't go as well for Nightcrawler and Wolverine, who attempt to contain a volatile new mutant threatening a high school -- but the local authorities refuse to recognize their credentials. The two X-Men teleport inside the school, but moments later the school explodes!

#445 PART TWO OF FOUR

Nightcrawler is able to teleport all the students to safety ... except for the young mutant, whom Wolverine was forced to kill. Local law enforcement are ready to lock up the two X-Men and throw away the key, but they're saved by Storm and Carol Dancers, a.k.a. WARBIRD of the AVENGERS, who secure their release.

Back at the mansion, Nightcrawler is disconsolate over the loss of the young mutant, and Storm attempts to comfort him ... with a bit of waltzing.

Meanwhile, Bishop, Marvel Girl [for non-X-Men readers like myself I will point out that Marvel Girl these days is Rachel Summers, with Jean being dead for a bit] and Cannonball travel to Braddock Manor in the United Kingdom, home of BRIAN BRADDOCK, the former CAPTAIN BRITAIN, and his wife MEGGAN. Upon arrival, they find the house deserted. Moving into the subterranean caverns beneath the house, the three X-Men are suddenly attacked by a cybernetic monster known as THE FURY! It easily bats Marvel Girl into orbit and puts down Cannonball ... perhaps for good!

#446 PART THREE OF FOUR

Through the cybernetic sunglasses Sage uses to communicate with the rest of the X-MEn, the Fury is able to possess her, and sends her on a rampage through the X-Mansion! By working together, Storm, Nightcrawler, and Wolverine are able to defeat Sage and free her of the Fury's influence ... and the four X-Men set off at once to England to help their friends take down the Fury once and for all!

The thing that haunts me: XSE STANDS FOR "X-TREME SANCTIONS EXECUTIVE"! WHAT THE FUCK!

Sage suckerpunches The Fury:

Panel 1:

SAGE approaches THE FURY.

SAGE (thought balloon): For all its POWER, the Fury is really quite stupid. It cannot invent strategy. It merely follows its PROGRAMMING.

Panel 2:

Closeup of the Fury's electronic eye.

SAGE (tb): It RESPONDS to perceived THREATS.

The Fury (internal readout thought balloon thingie): F001000100//:00110F$#%%^!. Global 101 System Reboot.

Panel 3:

SAGE faces THE FURY.

SAGE (tb): What threat is posed ...

Panel 4:

Closeup of THE FURY's eye again.

SAGE (tb): ... by a mere WOMAN?

THE FURY (irtb): PROXIMITY sensors detect contact. Posture: non-hostile. Danger to unit: MINIMAL.

Panel 5: blah blah

Panel 6:

SAGE punches through THE FURY's heart and shows off her ass.

[If you built a killer robot in the Marvel Universe, wouldn't you have it attack spandex-clad women on sight?]

I am SOOOOOOOOOOOO glad I didn't give in & actually buy an issue of this nonsense.

I await the day that Captain America tries to comfort Diamondback ... with The Charleston.

If only the Mandarin had thought to possess Tony Stark through his cybernetic cufflinks!

In the next issue of THE PULSE: Following Jessica Jones' miscarriage during a life-or-death struggle with THE COMMUTER, Luke Cage attempts to comfort her ... with the Lean Back.

It's another SILENT BOOK MONTH at Marvel, as everyone who has ever been an Avenger assembles to mourn the death of Captain Marvel -- and comfort each other through voguing.

It's quite telling that I chose to fixate on the "comfort ... DANCE!" thing out of all this hoohah.

xpost - OH NO TEP NOT YOU TOO!

Though, really, we're only a shuffletap away from the long-awaited _Dazzler / Footloose_ crossover. Written by Chuck Dixon, art by Bart Sears, edited by Arthur Murray.

I could be persuaded to buy a Dazzler solo series. I --

Oh dear. I just realized I can picture the panel in the Dazzler: the Movie graphic novel where naked Dazzler checks herself out in the mirror to bemoan the couple of pounds she's put on in her hips or something.

Oh, teenage Tep. Oh dear.

Now THAT'S graphic!

She was all made out of light and everything, so it was like a naked silhouette, but STILL.

Haha I was totally going to make fun of the comfort dance (we can dance/we can dance/everybody look at your hands) but Tep and Daver beat me to it!

Also, X-TREME SANCTIONS EXECUTIVE sounds like the dude who does all the firings at your company, only with a gigantic enegry cannon.

STORM: When I move you move.

NIGHTCRAWLER: Just like that?

Jordan, I hereby dub you Master of Your Domain. Use your power wisely, and don't forget to flush.

Any of you suckers take a look @ Gambit or Jubilee? I have heard the bad things about them, but am hoping for a 7th opinion.

I'm waiting to see what Jordan says about Gambit, since he's already committed to picking it up. Jubilee's one of those titles that could be fantastic in the right hands (both writerly and editorial) but is much more likely to be mediocre (I have no idea who's writing it and what the quality of X-editorial is these days).

Well, that killed that off, didn't it?