this is the thread where we admit to pathetic superhero/comix DREAMS

i had trouble sleeping last night, three hour batches, pure hell. anyhow at one point in one dream i was fighting the fantastic four (i haven't seen the movie or read any ff comix or thought about it lately so not sure what prompted it) and when i woke up my first thought was 'why was i fighting the fantastic four? i'm not a bad guy - i'm a good guy!' and my second thought was 'why the fuck was i dreaming about the fantastic four?'. the fighting wasn't big action faceoff or anything, more being at the same bar as them and talking shit about them to mutual acquaintances.

who else shared the magic night of superhero dreaming?

Say, I wonder what Mike Doonesbury's little brother is up to these days? He hasn't been around in ages! I don't think Kim's ever met him, and Alex hasn't seen him since she was a baby.

KILL ME NOW

WTF? I haven't even read an issue of the Morrison JLA in years! And where did this law and order stuff come from? I didn't even think that I was an advocate of the death penalty, let alone vigilante "justice"!

"Good Lord, an issue of JUDGE DREDD VERSUS THE FANTASTIC FOUR! And it looks like it's the FF that featured Everett True and Sid's Snake! What a find!"

And about five pages in I wake up.

I have WAY more dreams about awesomely weird bookstores and comic shops than I do dreams with actual comic book characters appearing in them. Unfortunately, I usually can't remember the amazing finds I make in them after I wake up.

A diffident, self obsessed 'beatnik' (DC Comics idea of a mixed up 70s dude). Superman rising out of a coffin during a service at a cathedral and starting a poison gas attack that kills everyone in the surrounding area. A gasmask wearing Batman leaping onto Superman's back outside the cathedral. The two of them tumbling to the floor. A panther let out from a zoo by Superman. The panther's cubs looking on as policemen machine gun it ("You want your mother... too late!") The panther cubs and police dogs tearing the policemen apart in a frenzy and then other police men gunning down the whole lot of them. They're enjoying firing on their colleagues. Close ups of the bullet holes in the corpses. Cut back to the beatnik. He's about to show a girl he is trying to impress a secret object he has, an object that relates to the mayhem that he is unaware is taking place across town....

Then I woke up.

Hey, anyone up for a thread where we collaboratively write the script for this? I'm going to hit the sack shortly, or I'd start it myself.

Heh. My power of flight rarely worked right when I had it in dreams-- it was usually something more akin to Jerry O'Connell's power from My Secret Identity, like I was swimming through air or struggling to defy gravity somehow-- not the graceful and effortless swoops one thinks of in regard to Superman and such. Once I was even Thor and had to hold on to that damn hammer to fly-- weird sensation being propelled along by it.

I dreamt I had to do some ILC moderating!

There was one thread that had 1000+ posts to it, and when I clicked on it, 80% of the posts were from one guy, and those were all pictures.

I am working as an usher at a Soho theatre where Trev and Simon from Going Live! are mounting a comeback show.

Unfortunately, we see a TV news broadcast that claims Trev and Simon have been kidnapped by terrorists while on holiday in Africa. We see a home video of their last hours subathing at their hotel. The newscaster says they have probably been killed.

I go round to TV chef Michael Barry's house for help, but he seems uninterested. He and my grandmother are making a vat of egg mayonnaise and fighting about who has the best recipe. Michael is going to use the egg mayonnaise as fertilizer to grow sushi.

A young Philip Schofield is at Michael's house, but I'm not allowed to speak to him, as he's doing an internship.

I meet Rich Johnston, who writes the internet comic column 'Lying in the Gutters', who says he's going to write a charity comic to let people know of Trev and Simon's sad plight.

Later, I walk along Charing Cross Road with my sister, and she reveals the whole thing was a hoax to get publicity for the theatre show. Trev and Simon are safe and well. I am the only person who has fallen for their trick.