This is the thread where we Americans list the things that happen regularly in America so that the Non-Americans can know what it is exactly that they should hate us for.

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- using "faggot" in every sentence
- always be killing people
- stealing money from poor people
- constantly reading the massively circulated vice magazine
- listening to "float on" by modest mouse

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:08 (twenty-one years ago)

yo man.. why you always be killing people?

cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:11 (twenty-one years ago)

i read it in vice? heard it in the modest mouse song?

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

GID BESA MERK

thorJESUHOY (Thor), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:13 (twenty-one years ago)

- not knowing every detail of the internal political workings of countries 10x smaller in size and population than our own

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:14 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.paperrad.org/america/20.jpg

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

yes Jon! I do that daily! thank you!

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

DEAN CRAMPIN MY SYTYL3

thorJESUHOY (Thor), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:17 (twenty-one years ago)

-being fully aware of the VIRULENT RACISM that occurs daily and just not giving a fuck

thorJESUHOY (Thor), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:18 (twenty-one years ago)

- having more money than a bunch of whiney socialists

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:19 (twenty-one years ago)

- constantly annoying internerd crepes by posting large images! many times!
- drinking pabst blue ribbon (it is mandatory to do this)

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:21 (twenty-one years ago)

yes, but they are only dollars, so they don't really count;)

chrltnldo (gareth), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:21 (twenty-one years ago)

-BEING NUMBER ONE

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:22 (twenty-one years ago)

(I'm not even sure what that means)

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:22 (twenty-one years ago)

right on hstencil! i am always being number one! every day!

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:24 (twenty-one years ago)

- getting our teeth cleaned

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:24 (twenty-one years ago)

-the obvious answer which we have all missed WE HAVE NOISE & THE NOIZXE DUDES

thorJESUHOY (Thor), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:26 (twenty-one years ago)

-really enjoying oral sex, sometimes paying for it

cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:27 (twenty-one years ago)

-letting our women vote, and wear pants

cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:27 (twenty-one years ago)

-getting our teeth straightened
-drinking weak-ass coffee and beer

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:28 (twenty-one years ago)

- letting the jews run our country, not letting the nazis get 30% of the vote

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

-buying japanese

cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

-being everything Europeans wish they were

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

-inventing everything Europeans wish to buy

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

- calling football "football"

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:30 (twenty-one years ago)

- saving your ass 3 times in one century

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:30 (twenty-one years ago)

-apple computers

cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:31 (twenty-one years ago)

-windows xp

cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:31 (twenty-one years ago)

- not being ugly douchebags who dance to fey music

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:31 (twenty-one years ago)

-the fucking lightbulb, the telephone, the internet

cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:32 (twenty-one years ago)

-inventing le rock n' roll so the French, British and Germans could all make crappy versions of it (at least krautrock is sometimes interesting).

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:32 (twenty-one years ago)

- welcoming your huddled masses

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:33 (twenty-one years ago)

(sub-question: would rock n roll exist without slavery?)

cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:33 (twenty-one years ago)

- moden electricity, the automobile, the airplane

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:34 (twenty-one years ago)

- modern electricity, the automobile, the airplane

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:34 (twenty-one years ago)

- listing nazi swag on ebay
- the ice cream cone

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:37 (twenty-one years ago)

- modern electricity, the automobile, the airplane

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:37 (twenty-one years ago)

vice magazine is from kanada.

gygax! (gygax!), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:37 (twenty-one years ago)

-modern ethnicity

cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:39 (twenty-one years ago)

- stealing vice magazine from kanada and making it america's official magazine

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:40 (twenty-one years ago)

- hip hop, jazz

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:41 (twenty-one years ago)

-modren electricity

thorJESUHOY (Thor), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:41 (twenty-one years ago)

- not listening to the libertines

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:42 (twenty-one years ago)

-allmusic.com

thorJESUHOY (Thor), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:42 (twenty-one years ago)

- modem eccentricity

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:42 (twenty-one years ago)

***NOT THE NEW ONE***

thorJESUHOY (Thor), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:42 (twenty-one years ago)

- modern ethnicity, the automobile, the airplane

cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:42 (twenty-one years ago)

- blue jeans
- COMPUTERS
- modern democracy

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:43 (twenty-one years ago)

-modem ethnicity

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:48 (twenty-one years ago)

(altho maybe minitel beat us to that)

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:48 (twenty-one years ago)

- blue's clues
- comptrollers
- modest mouseocracy

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Reg: All right ... all right ... but apart from better sanitation and medicine and education and irrigation and public health and roads and a freshwater system and baths and public order ... what have the Romans done for us?

Xerxes: Brought peace!

Reg: (very angry, he's not having a good meeting at all) What!? Oh ... (scornfully) Peace, yes ... shut up!

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:49 (twenty-one years ago)

-veggie burgers

cutty (mcutt), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:51 (twenty-one years ago)

ALL BURRITOVILLE, ALL THE TIME

lauren (laurenp), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:54 (twenty-one years ago)

- drug culture

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 19:58 (twenty-one years ago)

-good drug culture

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 20:06 (twenty-one years ago)

dude, we have no mdma. that's not a good drug culture from where i'm sitting.

lauren (laurenp), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 20:11 (twenty-one years ago)

MDMA WAS POPULARIZED IN TEXAS!

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 20:12 (twenty-one years ago)

I KNOW BUT GO THERE NOW AND TRY TO FIND SOME! AND GO ANYWHERE IN THIS COUNTRY AND TRY TO FIND MDMA POWDER, NOT E PILLS.

lauren (laurenp), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 20:15 (twenty-one years ago)

you'd think Texans would be proud of this.

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 20:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Sparks

gygax! (gygax!), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 20:18 (twenty-one years ago)

LAUREN, I WILL BRING U MDMA

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 23:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Take it to Craigslist.

dean? (deangulberry), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 23:25 (twenty-one years ago)

M4F 22M

HI I SAW U AT NO FUN FEST U R CUET

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 23:32 (twenty-one years ago)

M4?

HI I SAW YOU AT NO FUN FEST. YOU WERE WEARING AN OCTOPUS ON YOUR HEAD AND HAD ON FLOURESCENT CLOTHINGS (?) UNDER BLACK LIGHTING AND WERE HAMMERING AWAY ON A HOMEMADE INSTRUMENT. HOLLA.

gygax! (gygax!), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 23:34 (twenty-one years ago)

T/S: CAROLINER, RUBBER O CEMENT, ETC. VS. FORCEFIELD, FREAKZONE, ETC.

Whiskeytown Littlecock (ex machina), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 23:37 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.markprindle.com/kearney-i.htm

gygax! (gygax!), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 23:41 (twenty-one years ago)

you: were a weird-looking chick with quotation marks tattooed on your shoulders at No Fun Fest looking sorta drugged out.

me: someone who saw you.

what needs to happen: internet crepe.

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 23:43 (twenty-one years ago)

gygax! somebody (I can't remember who) recently asked me about getting in touch with Brandan. Do you know how one can?

hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 23:44 (twenty-one years ago)

i would ask mr. jack cole who i believe still might be doing the world of pooh reish ackshun.

gygax! (gygax!), Tuesday, 27 July 2004 23:50 (twenty-one years ago)

id like to rep the one thing i have to rep:
the ice cream cone was invented in norfolk va.

p.s. i like european rock bands pretending to be black better than american rock music. forever.

PLUS: native americans were eating mushrooms FIRST. (i made up this fact)

emma cleveland (emma cleveland), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 21:20 (twenty-one years ago)

rock and roll

latebloomer (latebloomer), Thursday, 29 July 2004 15:00 (twenty-one years ago)

p.s. i like european rock bands pretending to be black better than american rock music. forever.

BOO.

hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 29 July 2004 15:02 (twenty-one years ago)

i had this conversation with ian.
try to name 10 good american rock bands from the 60s and 70s.
its WAY harder than naming good british, or german ones.

i mean. U! S! A!

emma cleveland (emma cleveland), Thursday, 29 July 2004 18:30 (twenty-one years ago)

captain beefheart and his magic band
creedence clearwater revival
black flag
blue oyster cult
minutemen
steely dan
descendents
the association
the zombies
the byrds

i really can go on and on and on.

gygax! (gygax!), Thursday, 29 July 2004 18:33 (twenty-one years ago)

minutemen from the 60's and 70's?

cutty (mcutt), Thursday, 29 July 2004 18:34 (twenty-one years ago)

The Standells!

thorJESUHOY (Thor), Thursday, 29 July 2004 18:36 (twenty-one years ago)

the zombies = not american

dean? (deangulberry), Thursday, 29 July 2004 18:38 (twenty-one years ago)

d'oh! gygax! must've gotten their OBP confused.

hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 29 July 2004 19:35 (twenty-one years ago)

are you still upset that i pwn'd you yesterday?

gygax! (gygax!), Thursday, 29 July 2004 19:51 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah, coming up with a 10 american list isn't that hard for us folks who don't hate teh punk rock.

Ian c=====8 (orion), Thursday, 29 July 2004 19:57 (twenty-one years ago)

xpost to gygax! - I don't see any rings on these fingers.

here's another 60s/70s AMERICAN list:

Art Ensemble of Chicago
The Beach Boys
Big Star
Captain Beefheart & His Magic Band
Circle X
Cromagnon
Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young (sorta cheating but hey)
Devo
The Electric Eeels
The Electric Prunes
ESG
The Fabulous Highlighters
Factrix
Rev. Dwight Frizzell
The Godz
Grateful Dead
Hackamore Brick
Hall & Oates
Herb Alpert's Tijuana Brass
The Isley Brothers
Jefferson Airplane
Joe Byrd and the Field Hippies
Love
Lynyrd Skynyrd
The Meters
Moby Grape
The Monks
Montrose
MX-80 Sound
New York Art Quartet
Pearls Before Swine
Pere Ubu
The Ramones
The Red Krayola
Revolutionary Ensemble
Rocket from the Tombs
Silver Apples
Sparks
Steely Dan
The Stooges
The Styrenes
Sugarhill Gang
Television
The Thirteenth Floor Elevators
The Velvet Underground

throw in solo acts and it'd expand even more.

hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 29 July 2004 19:59 (twenty-one years ago)

more:

Crime
Flying Burrito Brothers
MC5
Nitty Gritty Dirt Band (first LP only)
Parliament/Funkadelic
The Fugs
Ya Ha Wo 13
The United States Of America
The Modern Lovers

gygax! (gygax!), Thursday, 29 July 2004 20:07 (twenty-one years ago)

all those are fine sans MC5. Also forgot Seger Sound System/Silver Bullet Band.

hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 29 July 2004 20:16 (twenty-one years ago)

The Germz.

Ian c=====8 (orion), Thursday, 29 July 2004 20:56 (twenty-one years ago)

applause gygax.
it can be done! but i like british wankery. a lot.

emma cleveland (emma cleveland), Friday, 30 July 2004 04:39 (twenty-one years ago)


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